Hello, so since a lot of us have not met yet I thought I would just take a second to kind of give the 30-second version of kind of who I am and where the Lord has led us from maybe not quite as far back as birth but you know where the Lord has led us to here. So My wife is Rebecca, and we've got three daughters. We live in St. Peter's, and I've been pastoring a church for about five years. don't get the wrong impression, I was the administrative pastor at a church, so one of a team, but pastoring in St. Charles for about five years. And about a year back, we felt pretty clearly the Lord was calling us to step out of that role because of some of the unhealthy elements that we saw at work that we were not able to overcome. And so that was a challenging, that's an understatement. That was probably a life-altering season for us. And the Lord has been kind to us to lead us here with Warren. So I'm guessing everybody here knows Warren Kesselring. But Warren and I went to college together, and we've maintained a friendship over the years. We were roommates in seminary for a while, so we've stayed connected. I never had Scott when I was at MoBAP, but I remember seeing him around, and I knew him to be a trustworthy man. The Lord just sort of led us to a few different places around our house in St. Charles, and we just could not find a place that it felt like the Word was taken seriously. I mean, that's a big indictment. I should be careful, but I'm just talking more about the perceptions we had, right? It was hard to find a place where the Word was taken seriously and where community was warm. I was just telling other Eric that it was hard to find a church where the music wasn't enhanced with a light show, right? And so we were just like, Lord, where do we go? What do you have for us? What are we supposed to do during this season of heartbreak and recovery and all this kind of stuff? And so Warren and Athena graciously invited us here, and we've been really thankful to be a part of this body for the last number of months. So, Scott, thanks for letting me talk for a little bit up here. So I've never actually been to one of these, so I don't know what the format is. If I infract in some way, forgive me. All right. Cool. So I heard that you had been talking about, for the last number of weeks, discipleship, how to help one another as men grow in Christ. And so that's really exciting for me. It was my passion when I was at the church in St. Charles. It's something that my wife and I have made a lot of, we spent a lot of time thinking about how do we care for one another and cultivate Christ-focused community. And so I'm really excited to be able to share some of that with you guys. I don't exactly know the format here, so I'm just going to share some thoughts. I've got a verse that kind of pulls some of these thoughts together for me, and I just kind of want to share some of those. And if you've got any questions or feedback or pushback, you can feel free to just yell it out. I grew up in a church a lot like Rockport. We valued speaking the truth in love. We valued being doctrinally formed. And that was just kind of part of our ethos as a community. And then I went to college and I went and got myself reformed. And in these reformed camps, you tend to find people who value clarity and truth telling. And so that was kind of the pace that has always been set for me. And yet, if I'm being honest, my disposition is towards more gentleness, more, well, let's call it what it is, man-pleasing, right? I lean more toward a soft word. Sometimes because I think it will love my neighbor, and sometimes because it serves me to have a soft word instead of a hard word, right? Because then I don't have to get pushback, and then I don't have to fight so much, and we can all just keep things easy, right? The reason I bring this up is because I think that tension is something each of us experience. Some of us might lean one way or another. Maybe we're more of the speak-the-truth kind of person, and maybe we're more of the but-don't-forget-the-love kind of person, right? But I think each of us feel that tension, and that tension exists because the flesh is at work in us, speaking the truth and demonstrating love to one another. is ultimately what I want to focus on today. I just want to highlight the fact that neither of those is inherently righteous. When this becomes righteous is when the Spirit of God produces it in us. Whatever we naturally let out of our mouths, whether that's a hard word or a gentle word, those are not necessarily born of the Spirit. They could just be born of the flesh, and they look nice. Right? And so, ultimately, our goal is to keep that dynamic tension of those two existing together in a way that only the Spirit can produce in us. And so, when I think through how do we help one another grow in Christ, my mind usually goes back to how do we minister the Word to one another? specifically using those categories that Paul gives us of how do we instruct one another, how do we teach and admonish one another in the Word, and how do we do that in a way that is effective in the sense of encouraging, being hard at the right time, being gentle at the right time. And so that's really what my desire is for us to talk about today. I've benefited a lot from watching the way Scott and the elders handle the word in the pulpit and how they handle the word interpersonally. I've seen so much wisdom from the elders here, and it's caused me to be very thankful. And it's something that I want to see trickle more into my life and trickle out into a community of men where we can speak truth to one another in love and see Christ formed in us. And so I can't think of a better verse that captures a lot of these thoughts than Colossians 3 16. So if you want to turn there, My printer broke, so I have my notes on my phone. Don't judge me, please. I'm still regenerate, even though I'm reading the Bible on my phone. So let's start at verse 12, just because it's so good, it's hard to not read it all. So Colossians 3. Paul's been talking about the power of Christ, the transforming elements of the gospel, and then in the previous section he's been talking about practices that we need to put off, things in our flesh that need to be put to death, and now he's getting ready to describe to us things that we need to put on. And this is all done not through self-will, but in cooperation with the Spirit. It's in the Spirit's power that these things are possible. So he says in verse 12, put on then as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness and patience, bearing with one another. And if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these, put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body, and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And it's that verse there, verse 16, that captures a lot of the different threads and pulls them together in a way that speaks to me. That we want to be people of the Word, where the Word of Christ is dwelling in us. We want to be teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom. And we want that ultimately to flow out of and produce in us thankfulness. Thankfulness to God for who He is and the work He's done to save us and to adopt us into His family. And so what I'd like to do is just go through a few reflections here as I scroll. So the first thing that this passage really points out is that if we want to encourage our brother, if we want to be an encouragement to one another in the Lord, we need to be dwelling in the Word so that the Word will be dwelling in us. Now, when we're in sin or when we're discouraged, when we're suffering, What we don't need is the wisdom or the dictates of man, right? I mean, I feel like I'm in a place where we know this. What we need from one another is the word ministered to our souls. And so the first call here is for us to be actively in the word, so that when it's time to speak to our brother, there's something to draw on, right? Something other than our own wisdom, our own thoughts. Because ultimately, over the last year, as we've gone through a season, my wife and I have gone through this season of regularly questioning what God's purposes have been, and why He has done these things. Why has God caused the lines to fall for us in this way, right? What we have needed every time has not been a friend to just pat us on the shoulder and say, you'll get through it, buddy. We also haven't needed a therapist to tell us how to cope with this deep hurt, right? What we've needed is people who will faithfully minister the Word to us. And we're thankful that we've found that. There have been plenty of times that we haven't, but there have been faithful friends who have ministered the Word to us. And so, When we're speaking to one another, when we're ministering the word to one another, we want to be careful that we are not calling our brother to submit to or to obey our own instincts, our own reflections, right? I mean, I can't think of a better example than the political debates on Facebook, right? Where Man, what starts as this righteous indignation about one thing or another immediately turns into calling everyone everywhere to submit to me. Right? Now, I would never say that, but the instinct in the heart is often to want to call folks to submit to us instead of reminding them who they need to be submitting to. So really, the point here is, I am no one's Lord, and I am powerful to save no one. And then by extension, that is also true of you. But who is powerful to save? Who can answer our deepest longings, and heal the hurts, and call us to heal when we wander off into sin? Jesus alone can do that. And so He is the authority that we speak, not our own. And then the next section here talks about speaking the word in wisdom to one another. So this is important as well. I think in In settings, I mean, Rockport is a good example, right? But in settings like these, where we are doctrinally formed, where we have learned to be students of the Word, it can become easy for us to simplify, oversimplify the ministry of the Word, right? So, at times, well, let me put it this way, I'll put it strongly. There is no phrase that has made me want to punch somebody more over the last year than being told that God is sovereign. Alright? Do I believe God is sovereign? Yes. Should that be an encouragement to me? Yes. But when it's associated with what I'm picturing as just like a little pat on the head, that is not an encouragement. It feels more like an insult in that moment. It feels more like I've poured out grief, right? Like in the vein of Job or whoever we're talking about. And all you've got for me is, hey brother, God's sovereign. Go be warm and be filled. Right? And that kind of ministry of the word is not what we're talking about. We're talking about ministering the word to one another in wisdom. We're talking about... Okay, so I'm going to tip my hand here. Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote a book called Life Together, where he lays out... Okay, let me back up a little more. We all know Dietrich Bonhoeffer, right? All right. So Bonhoeffer, he fled Germany, came to the U.S., taught theology for a while, felt guilty about fleeing his country and his people during the rise of the Nazi party, and so he went back, right as everybody else was leaving. and ended up laboring there, and ultimately being executed for attempting to assassinate Hitler, which is, I don't even have a category for godly assassination attempts. But thankfully, that's not what we're talking about. So what he did do is he wrote a book called Life Together. And he wrote that out of his evolving view of what the church should be he had watched the church in germany slowly but surely align itself with the nazi party and and thought surely this can't be who were called to be and so in this book he has more of the sense of uh... the the organic elements of community and connection within the body and it's it's really been helpful to me to draw out other elements that i just they were either lacking in my formation, or I just didn't notice them. I don't know which. But in there he spends a lot of time talking about our ministry to one another as a ministry of listening, and then a ministry of serving and bearing with one another, and then at the end he puts the ministry of proclaiming to one another. And part of what he's highlighting in there is that God has ordained... Okay, let me start over. The Scriptures are sufficient, right? Yes. Okay. And yet, that word means some things and doesn't mean other things. So, we also have a doctrine of the illumination of the Spirit, right? So, the Scriptures are fully sufficient, and yet, we cannot hand someone a Bible, and then with 100% certainty, they get saved. They read it, and, uh, I'm saved, right? Because there's another element at play there. The other element is the need for the Spirit to come and open the eyes and enliven the heart, right? Now, these are the two categories I've lived with the majority of my conservative, reformed, Christian life, right? What Bonhoeffer has helped me see is that there's another element at play. There is the community of God. And so, I guess the way I might try to put this is, in Romans 10, Paul's talking. Do you remember what Paul says? How can they believe unless they hear? And how will they hear unless people are sent? And so, there's this causal chain where God is sovereign, and in His sovereignty, He employs means. And often, the means He employs people right and so it's there's not a tension between God being sovereign and our calling as people to minister the word to one another whether that's an evangelism or whether that's with a guy in the room right and so what this has helped me see is that ministering the word to one another in wisdom often requires not shying away from those human elements right so I I This is where this gets tricky for me, but it's where I think a lot of the life and the joy is. I still mean everything I said about we don't need one another's wisdom. We need the Word. Right? The other piece is we need the Word brought to us by one another. Right? So how do I illustrate? Okay, so I get on Facebook, I get a wild hair, and I just really flame those people, right? And afterwards, I have a pang of conscience, and I'm like, eh, maybe that wasn't the most constructive, I don't know. I'm gonna go ask Scott what he thinks. So Scott reads my post, and Scott says, well brother, the word says, answer a fool according to his folly. And I think that's what you did. And then I'm like, well, maybe I'm going to get a second opinion. So I find Nevin, and I say, Nevin, this is what I put. Was that appropriate? He says, well, brother, the word says, answer not a fool according to his folly. And so I don't think you should have done that. Well, now what? Right? I mean, they've both brought the word to bear on my life. except one of them is presumably an error, or both, I don't know, right? But do you see that tension? The Word is sufficient, and yet we are not. Our application of it is not. And as the recipient, our reception of it is not. And so there's need for wisdom. There's need for prayerfulness, that the Lord would go before us and create an opening for our words. There's need for care when we speak those words. And often, what I've found most helpful is to have those words brought to me in a way that is customized through the experiences of the godly person bringing them to me and brought to bear into my situation. Does that make sense? Okay. So my best friend in the whole world, his name is Ryan. You don't know him. He is not Reformed. He's a believer, right? Solid believer. But he is an airplane mechanic. Right? I mean, he's about as blue-collar as it gets. Like, not a lick of seminary. And so all through seminary, I'm trying to tell him about my classes and the things I'm learning, and he's like, I don't get it. Right? But he's engaged, and he loves the Lord. So fast forward to about a couple years ago, I was just pouring out these worries, these fears I had. I wasn't calling them worries. That is important in the story. I just needed an audience, a sounding board for my fears, right? Ryan listens patiently, asks a couple follow-up questions, listens some more, and then he just looks at me and says, you know, for a guy who believes in God's sovereignty, you worry a lot. And it was an arrow straight into my heart. Right? I don't know. I don't know all the different potential futures. Maybe quoting me a lengthy passage could have done me even better. My hunch though is we had enough understanding in that moment. We had enough background and history and shared connection in the word that a lot of that wasn't needed in that moment. It was just that snarky, just shot to the heart that laid me out. There was so much he didn't need to say that happened in an instant in my heart that called me to repentance. It called me to inspect where my hope lied. And then he followed that up with like, hey man, what does the Bible say? God isn't surprised by any of this. God isn't too small for any of this, right? But that's what I mean by a fitting word. That's my desire for the people of God to not just dispense scriptures to one another, but to listen long enough to know which scriptures to bring to bear on this man in this situation. And then to do that in prayerfulness and in love. Not to let arrogance drive us to speak. Not to let fear keep us from speaking when we ought to speak. And then this other really deceptive category, not to let fear cause us to over-speak because we want to be just like Scott. Sorry, I don't mean to pick on you, it's just, your pace of faithfulness is an encouragement to us. And one of the things I've seen is we often pick somebody that we want to emulate, and then we force-fit ourself into that role. Right? We collect this jury of people from our lives, that we want their approval, even if they're not here to give it. Right? And so there are these categories where we can, in arrogance, assume our words will heal someone, and they won't. Or we can, in fear, hold back when God has called us to speak. Right? And we can, in fear, speak far more than we ought to have. Right? And so in all of these, I think what the Lord is calling us to do is to dwell in the Word, to let God's Spirit dwell in us, so that we are being worked on. And then as we're being worked on, there's something to share out of that. To bring that Word to bear to our brother when he needs it. And to pray with him, to weep with him, sometimes to slap him. Like, it just depends what's needed, right? But we don't always know, and we need the Lord to tell us. And then we need to be open to, is today a butt kicking kind of day or a let's go grab a coffee and talk it out kind of day, right? But I think what has ministered to me the most is when the men of God around me have been dynamic enough to read me and read the word and bring a fitting word at the right time.