Now, as Neil Mathias has said, we're continuing this little series that we're having on Thursdays on the life of John the Apostle. And perhaps for those of you who may be first-time visitors, I should explain, although it may be tedious to the members of our own congregation that I say this again and again, I remind them of Paul's words that it's not tedious for me to repeat this and it's good for you We began with a riddle yesterday and today's riddle is, do you know where in the New Testament those words come from? It's not tedious for me to repeat myself and it is good for you. Please don't email me with the answers. Those of you who were here yesterday, we had phone calls in the afternoon about the riddle, which was obviously a mistake. Sunday mornings in our church we are thinking about the teaching of John's Gospel chapter 1 through 12 and then during Easter week we're going to jump over to chapters 18, 19, 20 and 21. Wednesdays We are thinking about the teaching of the Lord Jesus in the upper room in chapters 13 through 17, and it just seemed to us the ideal time to kind of stand outside of all this teaching that the Apostle John gives and try and find out a little about John himself. And I hope this has been as interesting and stimulating to you as it has been to me, one of the first things that we talked about. was the very strong likelihood that John the Apostle was actually the son of the Virgin Mary's sister, that actually he was a cousin of the Lord Jesus. And when you put some of the pieces of the Gospels together, that's what the Gospels seem to come up with. And he is the person who describes himself as the beloved disciple. He began life being given a nickname by Jesus. Was it last week we were thinking about this? What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you think about the Apostle John to almost everybody? The less you know about the Bible, the more likely it is that this is what comes to your mind. He's the one who talks about love. He is the Apostle of love. But Jesus didn't give him that nickname. We gave him that nickname. The nickname Jesus gave to him was Son of Thunder. And so one of the things that we're exploring is how on earth was this son of thunder turned into the apostle of love? He had a temper and the Gospels make it pretty clear he had a violent temper. He flared up in some instances violently against people. So he wasn't by nature the apostle of love. He was the apostle of love only because of what these words meant to him. He was the disciple that Jesus loved. Didn't Jesus love the other disciples? Well, of course he did. So what was there about Jesus' love for the apostle John that changed his life? And the passage that we're going to read together today, in some ways, as with next week, takes us to the very heart of the matter. It's in Mark chapter 14 verses 32 to 42 and we begin to read, they went to a place called Gethsemane, this is following the Last Supper, and Jesus said to his disciples, sit here while I pray. And he took with him Peter and James and John. and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And he said to them, my soul is very sorrowful even to death, remain here and watch. And going a little further, he fell on the ground and prayed that if it were possible the hour might pass from him. And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet, not what I will, but what you will. And he came and found them sleeping and he said to Peter, Simon, are you asleep? Could you not watch one hour? Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. Now Mark's gospel, we know from the history of the church, is almost certainly Mark's version of Peter's memoir of Jesus. We know that Mark acted as a kind of scribe for the Apostle Peter, and I think that's the reason why Peter, as it were, is singled out here. Not that the other two, James and John, should not be singled out, but this is really Peter's confession. When Peter was preaching about Jesus in Gethsemane, this was the part he selected. Because he wanted people to see what God had done in his life, changing him from the man who fell asleep to the man who encouraged others to be wide awake spiritually and on the lookout. but John was there too and John was asleep also and the same words apply to John verse 38 watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation the spirit indeed is willing but the flesh is weak and again he went away and prayed saying the same words and again he came and found them sleeping for their eyes were very heavy and they did not know what to answer him now here's a question how did they know that when he went away and prayed the second time, he used the same words. Well, he came the third time and said to them, Are you still sleeping and taking your rest? It is enough. The hour has come. The Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise, let us be going. See, my betrayer is at hand. In my final year in the Divinity Faculty of the University where I studied, I had in that last year one particular professor whom I saw almost constantly. I saw him for two hours every week with an entire class of other students. I saw him two hours every week with two other students. I saw him two hours every week absolutely on my own. Now the downside of all this extraordinary exposure was, I think I still have the two and a half pages of notes that I took down from this particular professor's lips. It was not the most educative experience of my life. But reflecting on that, few hours with a whole class, few hours with just two others, few hours on my own. reminds me of the way in which Jesus handled the disciples, the way in which he drew them on. There were times when in his teaching he was speaking to all of them, what we are thinking about on Wednesdays, such an occasion. Originally there are 13 of the room, then Judas leaves, there are 12, and the Apostle John is there with the whole class of disciples. And then there are occasions, we'll come to one of them next week, where Jesus engages John, as it were, absolutely individually and individualistically. And there are several occasions when Jesus takes John just with two others. It's always with James, his brother, and Simon Peter. And you remember what those occasions were towards the beginning of Jesus' ministry when Jesus took the parents of the little girl who had died and with them took his three close disciples and got everybody else out of the room where the little girl's body was lying and there Jesus raised the daughter of Jairus from the dead. And then there was a second occasion, in some ways almost the opposite, where Jesus took his disciples, James and John and Peter, up a mountain and before their very eyes it was as though who he truly was inside burst through outside, even seemed to affect the clothing he was wearing. And he just shone, he was transfigured before them. And he was visited by Moses and Elijah. Two amazing experiences. In which, as I think I may have said, it was almost as though just for a moment Jesus was taking them into the secrets of his real identity and momentarily switching on the light. And then, of course, soon the light would go off, but they had seen who he really was. Now, if that was true of the first two occasions when Jesus took these three alone with him, almost the opposite was true of this occasion. In a way, on this occasion, it wasn't so much that Jesus was switching on the light as he was actually switching on the darkness. And here the disciples have left the upper room. Presumably by the time they get to the Garden of Gethsemane, the darkness is beginning to set in. Jesus takes them with him and he says to John and Peter and James, I want you three to come with me. And then he says to them, now, I want you to be with me, but just stay here. I've got to go a little further. I've often thought that those words in Mark's Gospel here, he went a little further, are not only locational, are they? They are spiritual. And what happened in the time that followed? Was it half an hour? Was it an hour? We've no way of knowing. In the time that followed, in many ways, brought the Apostle John to the very heart of the meaning of Jesus' life and ministry and has the power to do the same thing for us in different ways. What happened here? Well, first of all, John was a witness of the deep sorrow of his Savior. And you see how Mark tells this. He says that John and the others saw it. Do you notice the word that's used? Jesus, we are told, verse 33, began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And then he said, so that they could see what was true about him before he said anything about it. I wish in some ways there was language, simple language in the English language to express the verbs that Mark uses here in the gospel when he says that Jesus was greatly distressed and troubled. They're tremendously strong words. It's language that describes You know the kind of experience you have when you get such a shock or such overwhelming news that you can't keep your mind still. Some of you know what it is to have your mind racing and you can't bring it back. It's like a needle in an instrument that's going here and there and you just cannot calm down because of the impact of news that you've had. It's a language that's used about Jesus here. It's language that describes somebody who, as it were, is on the verge of total meltdown. A situation has arisen that... and isn't this true sometimes when you get a shock? Now a shock isn't just information, isn't it? It's news about something that's happened. You get all kinds of news about things that have happened. But when you get a real shock, it affects you physically, doesn't it? You feel the physical impact of it. Now that's the language that is used here about the Lord Jesus Christ. It's so important for us to understand that because, you know, you can go through the whole of your life in the world of the church and the world of the Christian faith and never actually discover who Jesus really was and is. To have a kind of plaster Jesus. You know, Jesus who never moves. A Jesus who of course is perfectly holy, but in your thinking about him, perfect holiness means that he's far removed from you. He's obscure. He's still. He's always a statue. Incidentally, just in passing, That's why it's never a good idea. It wasn't because the reformers were nutcases, extremists, that they said we've got to get rid of these statues of Jesus. It was because they understood Jesus never was, never is, never shall be a statue. You see? You notice how people sometimes get very excited because of these strange things that happen. Tears coming out of statues. You see what that says about How much they think about Jesus as a statue. And you see the marvellous thing here is that the Lord Jesus was bringing John and James and his friend Peter to see the deep distress of soul that he was going through. So much so that they not only saw it, but they heard him say, verse 34, My soul is very sorrowful even to death. Even to death. Some of you have tasted this experience. I will never forget the night my brother died. Lying in bed and feeling the pressure of that news. I really wondered if I was going to die myself. I really wondered if I was going to make it through the night. That's what he's speaking about here. That the pressure of what he is about to experience is so powerful upon his being that he is concerned that he might actually die in the Garden of Gethsemane. And he's saying to them, now I want you to sit here and watch and pray. You've got to be with me in this. Now what did John learn from this? Well, he learned actually what he would say at the very beginning of his gospel, that the Word was made flesh. The Word was made flesh. And from this moment onwards, he could never, ever, ever, ever be in any doubt whatsoever that the Lord Jesus understood his deepest needs. You see? That's what Jesus wanted. He wanted his friend John to know that he is the kind of Savior to whom you can turn in every conceivable circumstance and say, Lord Jesus, you alone fully understand what I'm going through because you have gone through this and you have gone through deeper waters than this. So this is a story that helps us to see how the Apostle John learned to understand the sorrow of his dear Savior. But of course the second thing that he was to understand from this was the severity of his personal weakness. Jesus goes and he prays. Now my question, how did they know what he prayed? Ah, because they were still awake. They heard him begin to pray. And despite the fact that they heard him pray what he prayed, their eyes were heavy, they were burdened. You know how sometimes tension and anxiety, which they obviously felt, can almost have a soporific effect upon you. The shock was so great as they saw what was happening to Jesus that they couldn't stay awake. Do you notice that John failed Jesus three times as well as Simon Peter failing Jesus three times? We often point the finger at Simon Peter, don't we, on this night? Three times you did it. But you see, John did it three times as well. The disciple whom Jesus loved, he fell asleep and he fell asleep and he fell asleep. And he was beginning to discover the weakness of his trust in Jesus, the weakness of his love for Jesus. And yet the amazing thing is that Jesus comes. What would you do to somebody who let you down in this situation? You would never trust them again, would you? Once bitten, twice shy. Is that a South Carolina expression? Maybe not. Do you understand what it means? You've met people they could never love again because they were disappointed by those they thought loved them most and they are damaged goods, they feel, for the rest of their lives. And Jesus comes and it's all necessary. He picks them up from their sleep. He's profoundly disappointed in them. Let's not minimize that. He is overwhelmingly disappointed in them. But you see, he says to them, kick them out of the way. Remember the words that Jesus loved so much from Isaiah, a bruised reed he won't break, a dimly burning wick he won't snuff out. And he says to them, oh my children, I know your spirit is willing but your flesh is weak. I want you to notice some words that are here. Where we're told, look at the middle of verse 40. When Jesus came and found them again sleeping, for their eyes were very heavy, they did not know what to answer him." Now listen, that's just as well. That's just as well that they had no answer. Indeed, I think in some ways it was the beginning of a gracious work in them. Do you know what it's like when you speak to people who are sinful and who are weak, and you speak to them about the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, they have a very quick answer for you. A very quick answer. Do you remember how Paul says, when somebody really begins to understand the gospel, they begin to see that in the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ, listen to Paul's words there from Romans 3, Every mouth is shut. The whole world is held guilty before God. And that's a sign, you know, of God's grace in people's lives when they stop talking. When they stop talking back to the gospel. You discover this, I suppose, just because of what I do in life. I discover this quite a lot, that you meet a stranger, they ask you what you do. Why is that always the first question people ask? Tells you a lot about our society, doesn't it? Not who are you, but what do you do? I'll measure you in terms of what you do. And I've noticed if I tell people what they do, total strangers, they'll start giving me lectures about their brilliant understanding of religion, as though I was a complete ignoramus, as though I'd never opened a book. And they talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, you see. And you know they've never, ever, ever come to faith in Jesus Christ, because they're people whose mouths have never been shut. They've never found themselves, by God's grace, so convinced of their own spiritual weakness, need and sinfulness, that they look at Jesus and they've got nothing to say. Nothing to say. I always find that to be a and evidence of God's working when somebody who has sinned comes and says, I have nothing to say. All I can do is rest on the mercy of Jesus. Listen, I think it's true that there cannot be much depth in my Christian life unless I've known what it is to have nothing to say to Jesus in my own defence." And that's what John was learning. He was learning, however sore it was, and it must have been tremendously sore, he was learning that that really is the beginning of a new work of grace in somebody's life, when we learn the severity of our personal weakness, that we are absolutely helpless and hopeless. That actually, you see, he was learning, here is my dear Saviour and I know that He's come into the world to do something for us and there is absolutely nothing I can do to help Him. He's the only one who can save me. But then this third thing that I think John was intended to learn, the sorrow of his dear Saviour, the severity of his personal weakness, And thirdly, the suffering that was involved in providing him salvation. And that of course is really underscored for us in the prayer that Jesus offers, verse 36, and we know that Jesus prayed this again and again. He said, Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me, yet not what I will, but what you will. Now I think it's very important for us to, as it were, parse what Jesus is saying here. Remember how at school, you know, you get a sentence, parse this sentence, break it down into its constituent parts. Look at it carefully enough to see how this sentence is constructed. This is a sentence that we really need to parse. Jesus prayed, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me, yet not what I will, but what you will. first of all grasp this, Jesus did not want to drink this cup. The Heavenly Father wanted Jesus to drink this cup. That's something that makes Christians very nervous, doesn't it? Jesus doesn't want to do what the Father wants him to do. Well, it's not quite that. Let me parse the sentence. What's going on here? Let me put it this way. As somebody who was in perfect fellowship with his Heavenly Father, Jesus could not want the contents of this cup. We know what the contents of this cup were because the Old Testament, with some regularity, speaks about a cup. that comes from the hands of God. Let me read you some of the passages. Isaiah, for example, speaks about the cup of God's fury. That's a cup of trembling. He speaks about the dregs of the cup of My fury that causes trembling. That's exactly what was happening in the garden of Gethsemane. Here's what Jeremiah says about it. Take the cup of this fury at my hand. They shall drink. Now listen to this. They shall drink and be moved and be beside themselves. That's exactly what was happening to Jesus. Here's Ezekiel about the cup. You'll drink the cup deep and large and you'll be laughed to scorn and had in derision. That's exactly the language that's used in the passages that follow the Garden of Gethsemane. And here's Habakkuk. You are filled with shame for glory. The Lord's right hand shall be turned against you and shameful spitting will be on your glory. You see, this is going to be literally fulfilled in Jesus until on the cross He's going to cry out, My God, why have you forsaken me? That's what He saw in the cup and He could never, ever, ever, ever wish the contents of that cup. No one who was in fellowship with the Heavenly Father could ever wish to be alienated from the fellowship of the Heavenly Father. It would be sinful to want that. And yet, at the same time, the Father was saying, that's exactly what I want you to drink, my child. I want you to drink what you, in your perfect holiness, could never want to drink. And I want you to do that. Not because you aspire to the contents of the cup, but because you want to be obedient to me, your heavenly Father. And so he says in these amazing words, Father, not my will, my will is that I should never for a moment be alienated from your presence. Not my will, but your will. be done. Think about it this way, which I think the Gospel writers intend for us. Just press the fast rewind button in your memory of the Gospel story. Where have they come from? They've come from the upper room, haven't they? What was the last thing that happened? Jesus passed a cup round It's actually what they called the cup of blessing at the Passover. And he said, I myself will not drink of this cup until I drink it new in my heavenly Father's kingdom. We've no information whatsoever, and since this was a very secret meal, I think it would be fair to say that cup that the disciples had all drunk of, it was still lying on the table, and it hadn't crossed Jesus' lips. And now he was going into the garden of Gethsemane and the cup that he was taking from the hands of his father was actually a cup of cursing that he alone would drink in order that his disciples and the disciple whom Jesus loved, the disciple John, might drink the cup of blessing. Actually, the Old Testament had a picture of this that Paul picks up, you remember in Romans 8 when he says, he who did not spare his own son but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not also with him freely give us all things? And the very verbs that are used there are actually taken from the Greek translation of the Old Testament in the narrative of Abraham's willingness to sacrifice Isaac. And people have often thought, how could God tell this man that his son was going to die? How could God challenge Abraham to do something that was contrary to everything Abraham could desire? And you remember God put a halt to it. But the reason He put a halt to it was because what Abraham didn't need to do God himself was going to do on the cross in Jesus. And so the third thing that John, the disciple Jesus loved, learned in the Garden of Gethsemane was this. If he's prepared to go through this for me, I need never, ever, ever, ever doubt his love again. Heavenly Father, we thank you for moments when we feel that at least we can gather around the disciples who were in the outer circle around Jesus that night and catch some sense of what he was showing them, what he was teaching them, what he was doing for them. And we thank you today that we know that what he did for his beloved disciple John. He has also done for us. Help us, we pray, to bask, to bathe in his love. Now, bless us, we pray, as we go about the rest of the day, and grant that as in this way, through your Word and by your Spirit, we have been with the Lord Jesus, that it may be evident that we have been with Him and He has been with us. We pray for this blessing in His great name. Amen.