All right, I want to start today with a video that was actually just recorded this past week. Paul David Tripp is one of the speakers you guys have seen before, but they did an interview for him at a breakfast for the Hope for Orphans Ministry, which is the ministry that puts on this rooted material. And so I want to play just some clips of him talking about the gospel and then talking about our role as parents and how, kind of where we left off last time as parents, we're called to seek to reflect the love of God that we see in the gospel towards us as children. We've seen that in the Old Testament, we see it in the New Testament, but he talks a little bit more about that and so I want to let him kick us off this morning. that I'm meant to make the invisible authority of God, the invisible presence of God, the invisible grace of God visible in the lives of my children. I'm the look on his face. I'm the tone of his voice. I'm the touch of his hand. What could be a holier calling than that? And I'm the tool on hand. Are you ready for this? for the forming of a human soul. Oh my goodness. I mean, what would rise in greater value and importance than that? So that ambassadorial calling is very important. And so I want to represent God well. I want my children to know I love them, to know that I'm a man of grace, that I'm faithful and patient and kind, because that's who God is. I want that, but I also know this. It's very dangerous for them to attach their identity to me. It's dangerous because there is a Messiah for my children. It doesn't happen to be Paul Tripp. I'm a poor, broken, horrible example of a Messiah. I'm a man in radical need of rescue every day. Unlike the Messiah, I need constantly to be rescued from me. And so I want, rather than children to look at me as a painting and say, if I could just be like Dad, I want to be a window to the glory of the Lord Jesus Christ. And I want their attachment to being to Jesus. And I want to point them to Jesus and to the astounding grace and patience and love of the ultimate adoptive father, Jesus. I want my children to love Jesus. And one of the ways to do that is to depict to my children my need of Jesus and my rest in Jesus. Enough of self-righteous parenting It crushes your children. Stop saying, in my day, I would have never. In your day, you were an idiot too. Just own it. You did the dumbest things. It's just wrong. If you've yelled at your children, Don't cover yourself with self-justifying arguments as you walk down the hallway. Let the conviction of the Holy Spirit roll over your soul and go back to your child and say, your dad just did what he shouldn't do and in doing that, your dad demonstrated how much he needs the forgiveness and the empowerment of the Savior, the Lord Jesus. I'm more like you than unlike you. Recognize that there's few struggles in the life of your children that you still can't find someplace in your own life. All the time. The goal of parenting is not control of behavior. If all you do is set up a neat system to control the behavior of your children, when your children leave the home, they have nothing. Every year, thousands of supposedly Christian young people go off to residential universities and forsake the faith. I would propose to you they're not forsaking the faith they never had in the first place. It's the faith of their parents. What comes out is the true condition of those children's hearts. Parenting is about the heart. Because the theology of human functioning in the gospel is that we live out of the heart. The heart being the causal core of your personhood, the center of your thoughts and emotions and desires and intentions, your will. And so I'm always aware that lasting change in a child's behavior always travels through the pathway of the heart. I'm looking for opportunities to get at heart issues with my children. And I understand that they're blind to their own hearts because that's what sin does. Sin blinds you. And the most significant aspect of the blindness of sin is unlike physical blindness where a physical blind person knows they're blind Spirits of the blind people are blind to their blindness. And so I want to be an instrument of seeing in the life of that child. You know this is true, when you ask Johnny why he hit his sister Susie, he'll never say to you, because I'm a sinner. I've got violence resident in my heart and I need to be rescued for me. Parent, where can I find the savior? Never heard my kids say that. In fact, when Johnny, this is important, when Johnny, when I asked Johnny why he hit Susie, who does Johnny talk about? Susie. Parents here are about to say, as long as your child is convinced that the biggest issues of his life, the biggest dangers of his life exist outside of him and not inside of him. He is no longer interested in parenting, let alone God's grace, because he's telling himself, I don't need it. And so I want to lead my child to understand the worst news ever. My biggest problem in life is me. Because until you accept the worst news ever, you'll never be excited about the best news ever. This is the way the gospel works. Only people who accept the bad news of the gospel run toward the good news of the gospel. That's the way it works. And so I want to get a child, I want to turn the camera away from situations, away from locations, away from other people, turn the camera toward the child, help the child to look at things they wouldn't possibly look at without me. That's the first thing. The second thing is that the central life-shaping issue of the heart is worship. You see, often when we hear the word worship, we think Sunday morning, a gathering, or if you go to a real cool church, Saturday night. And what you need to understand is for we human beings, and this includes your child, worship is first your identity before it's your activity. your child is a worshipper. They don't just worship on Sunday, they worship their way through every moment of every day. You can almost argue that the only thing a human being ever does is worship. Because every word of your child, every decision of your child, every action of your child is rooted in the worship of something. That's the exegesis of the gospel. that is so incredible in Romans starts with this issue, Romans 1.25. You only have two options. You are giving your life in worship and service of the Creator, or your life is shaped by worship and service of the creation. That's the only two ways any human being has ever lived. And so the central issue is worship. what right here right now is ruling the heart of the child. And the Bible connects character deficiency to idolatry. That means those moments when my child has been rebellious or been selfish or been violent are opportunities given to me by God to talk about the most significant issue in all of the human existence, worship. Are you listening to me? Don't get mad. Don't stomp down the hallway irritated. Think of what's happening. If your eyes ever see or your ears ever hear the sin, weakness and failure of your children, it's never an accident. It's never a hassle. It's never an interruption. It's always grace. God loves that child. He's put him in a family of faith and he will expose their need to you so you can be a tool of his rescue and redemption. It's grace. It's grace. It's grace. Why would you get mad? I think that we need to own the reality that we get ripping mad because we actually have children that require parenting. And in that way, those moments expose the gospel. And that's the brilliance of God choosing people who need grace to give grace to children who need grace. Because in those moments, when you have to surrender your leisure or surrender the job that you're doing at that moment to the needs of your children, you are being graced. God is rescuing you from you, the great wise father is parenting everybody in the room. If you don't understand the centrality of the heart and you don't understand the central issue is the issue of worship, you will believe that you can do with the law what only grace can accomplish. And you will think, if I can only set up a neat set of rules with an accompanying set of enforcement, my children will be okay. If all your children needed was that, Jesus would have never had to come. I'm going to hurt your feelings here, but I think it's important to say, if you have reduced your function to be a lawgiver, a prosecutor, a judge, and a jailer, What you're doing is neither Christian nor parenting. It's just not. It's a failed system. And it's shocking to me how easy it is for us to abandon what we celebrate in services of worship in our homes with a relationship with children. If this is the way the Father rescues and redeems you, wouldn't that be your model for your children? from the audience here. Do you see any concerns with a science-driven and a Christian-sensitive approach to training parents in the church? No, I've said it already. We need to be aware of and knowledgeable of just the effects of the fall on our children. and the huge emotional, psychological disruption of not being with my natural birth parents. And we need to learn from people who study that. I think that's appropriate. On the other hand, we need to carry with that the significant and important things that the Bible says about how human beings function, about the impact of sin, the way that the heart works, this issue of worship, and so there's a way in which it's It's wisdom, the best of wisdom of the world, you know what I mean by that? And the best of the wisdom of the Word that combines together. It's very, very important. And I want to say this, I think we, Luella and I just didn't think in those ways. We just thought, you know, it's true on one hand that God just brought Nicole into our house in a different way and she was from the foundations of the earth chosen to be our child and it would just be the same. And in that way we were not believing in the richness of what we say we believe. This is a broken world and in its brokenness you better understand the impact of that brokenness on human being thinking and desiring and choices and functioning. and to couple with that the beauty of the truths and the grace of the gospel. Before we get into our handout here, I just wanted to give you guys an opportunity. What was something that he said that maybe stood out to you, or maybe was just a really helpful, he's got a real way with words and expressing things, but anything that struck you in particular, or maybe something a little different than you thought about it before? Yeah. I loved how he said that Bob's parenting all of us. Like when we're teaching our kids, he's not only parenting me, but he's also parenting my children. Yeah. That's great. What else? I thought maybe he had a hidden camera at our house or something, I don't know. What else? Yeah? The goal of parenting is not controlling behavior. It's a hard one to remember. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like the last stage when we talked about, you know, the two secular studies and my experience has given me, how should I say this, some more insight that I might not have otherwise had. those explorations, it still points you back to the gospel. And if you dive head first into those waters, it provides some insights and techniques, but not the ultimate solution. So I think it's a good approach, just like we would do if we had any particular health issue. You're not going to query all the doctors. Now, before you advise them about my kidneys, are you a Christian? You're going to take his knowledge or her knowledge on face value based on their studies. But then, of course, pray along with it. And I think the same thing should be done in adoption. You study, encounter different ideas, and evaluate them with your family next to the word. Yeah. Anything else stood out to you guys? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he said something about, I'm not the messiah, I'm not the savior and the rescuer of my kids. I want to lead them. I pray God will use me to be that agent in their life. But I think Russell Moore said at the last Christian Alliance for Orphans, We need to get rid of our Messiah complex, and we need to embrace the complexities of the Messiah, you know, and the real Messiah, the Savior that we need. And I appreciate how we talked about how we need to keep pointing them that we need this Savior, too, as moms and dads. I think one of the continual themes through all variety of speakers has been really dispelling the notion of getting your kids to ideally attach to you. Yes, we want that, but that's not the primary thing. And I think that's new for a lot of adaptive families. I mean, we've been on the journey 20 years. I've never heard that before. And so that's really, seeing everything through the lens of scripture, which is what I love about this class, is that it's taking all the knowledge in the information and then putting it through that lens to filter it through. Yeah. Praise the Lord. Yeah. Just what you said at the end about like when they adopted their daughter just like I didn't even think that there would be a difference when we adopted. I didn't think I would ever feel I didn't know, you know, like I didn't really think there would ever be a difference between my biological children and my adopted children. It didn't cross my mind. And even understanding the gospel and adoption through the gospel, I had no idea that it would be different. I'm not the judge, jury, jailer, prosecutor for my children. And if it is, the system is broken. It comes back to that heart issue. Shepherd the heart. And the faith part of it, you should be pointing to Christ as the window portion of that. Otherwise, it kind of struck a chord of remembering a series that Kerry Hardy did about how to raise the Pharisee. It was not having that grace. focus of having grace but always trying to modify the behavior that will lead to that heart that's probably hard towards God. Because we haven't shown our children then the God of grace who gives us grace every day. Instead it's about grace, upon grace, upon grace. And I don't do that with my children. The one thing that stood out to me that you also don't hear a lot about is this whole concept of worship. And I think that might actually be a good thing to come back to is as parents, what are we worshiping and then what are we idolizing? Brian Borgen, I think his was the first book on parenting that I read that really talked about the idols of our own heart. And he talked about that when he was here also. I encourage you to read that chapter again in light of what he was talking about, because we want to help our children, but we need to first of all deal with some of the worship issues and idol issues in our own heart. So let's look at some of the scriptures we have here, and what we've been doing, for those of you that haven't been with us the whole time, is we're going through some of the material for Rooted, and the Rooted group is the one who put on this video here. But we're also working our way through the scriptures, and we're right now in the sections of Proverbs through Isaiah. And so just this first part here, I'm just kind of categorizing some scriptures as I see them. The heart of Jesus understands our struggles and offers redeeming, healing, and help. Who would like to read that part from Isaiah 40? Like a shepherd, he will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. you will gently lead the mother with their young. How can you say the Lord does not see your troubles? He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Those who trust in the Lord will find new strength." So looking at that passage there, what are some things that can help us seeing how the Lord relates to us as we think about relating what the gospel has done for us, what Christ has done for us, that can help us and how we want to model that to our children. It's interesting, the mother with their young, so he actually has this gentle-cared, leading mothers with their little ones. It's the image of like a lamb or a sheep with its little lambs coming along with it, but he's talking about his people here. that he has a gentle care for mothers, a special care in his heart for their little ones, but also for the mothers caring for them. What else in that text? It's like a rhetorical question, how can you say the Lord does not see your troubles? I like that first part there, he will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. And that's a physical, visible image there that we can seek to model with our precious little ones, that they're precious to us. We're like a shepherd, we're carrying them, we're holding them close so that they know that they're close to our heart. And then, if we ever feel weak, ever feel powerless, ever need new strength, that's that promise there. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. And I think what you do is you read that whole chapter, and that's one of the fulfillments of how he does that, Isaiah 40. But Isaiah 53, this familiar passage, but think about it in this context. A man of sorrows and acquainted with grief, He's well familiar with grief. He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows, and the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed. And so that's where I get that concept is that He's redeemed. The most important thing He came to do is to redeem us, but He also offers healing and help for our griefs. He's acquainted with them. Hebrews talks about how He knows our sufferings. He's been tempted in every way as we are, so He can give us help in our time of need. And so that's also why Christ came. Not just to save us from our sin, but the effects of sin, the griefs, the sorrows, our need of peace, our need of healing. Let's read Isaiah 61 out loud together. He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to comfort all who mourn, to console, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning. We can just stop there. This is ultimately Jesus speaking, so when he comes into the synagogue he grew up in, in Nazareth, he reads this scripture, and then he goes and he sits down, and all the eyes of the place are on him, and he says, this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing, and it says the people were marveling as these gracious words were coming from his lips. So Jesus is saying, Isaiah's talking about me here, Jesus was sent, this is what he was sent to do, some of what he was sent to do, to heal, the brokenhearted, to comfort all who mourn, to console, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and it goes on to talk about opening eyes to see and setting free those who are oppressed. And so then the Lord calls his people to extend his ministry to those needing help and healing. And I want to play an example from Michael Monroe. This is just a couple-minute clip. But he talks about how with his own child, how God helped him to see that his own child was struggling with griefs and sorrows and mourning. But initially, it just looked like a behavioral meltdown. And so I want to play a little bit of that clip also. Many of our kids simply don't have the practice of being able to identify the feelings that they're feeling and then articulate their feelings. And frankly, many of our kids come from histories where no one was there to listen anyway. And so we have to be very mindful of the fact that These feelings are inside of our kid and they're swirling about. And yet, they need us to help them identify those, give voice to those, and sometimes we have to really be willing to work through when Sad looks mad to help them do that. I remember one time when our eight-year-old boy had become very upset because something didn't go his way. Now, as is often the case, this happened right before we were getting ready to walk out to go to church. And it was a very inconvenient time. Everything inside me said, you know what? He's got to get it together. We've got to be at a church on time. And not only that, we've got to be on church on time, looking good. But I knew there was more going on in this case. My wife and the other kids, they went to church and I stayed back with him until he was able to calm down. It took nearly 30 minutes, and during that 30 minutes, let's just say he threw a pretty big tantrum. It was really an ugly scene, and yet, when we got to the end of that 30 minutes, and he was able to stay calm, I was able to stay calm, he was able to calm down because I, in part, had stayed calm. What I ended up finding out is that he had some really, really pervasive feelings of sadness, and that was what was driving the behavior, the unacceptable behavior. Once we were able to get him calmed down, we were able to remind him that we don't act that way, even if we're feeling sad inside. Instead, we use our words, and when we use our words, Mom and Dad are going to listen, and we're going to help you, and we're going to talk with you, and we're going to listen to you. But we can't use our actions. We can't be ugly. We can't be disrespectful. We certainly can't throw tantrums and fits like that. But I just think it's important that for us as parents and we encourage other parents to remember that sad can often look mad and we have to be there to both correct our kids behavior but to connect with them in a way that can get to that root cause that can then grab them by the hand and run toward that sadness and help them to begin to make sense of that so that we can help them in their healing journey and connect with them along the way. Alright so kind of bridging the section here where we talk about what Jesus came to do, and then the same book of Isaiah, in Isaiah 58 here, calls God's people, this is the worship, this is kind of the equivalent, the Old Testament equivalent of true and undefiled religion. He's talking about, I don't want your fasting and your worshiping when your heart is not right, but he says, these are the things I'm looking for, that you loose the bonds of wickedness Undo the heavy burdens let the oppressed go free and break every yoke bring to your house the poor who were cast out These are just some snippets of Isaiah 58 and healing shall spring forth if you extend your soul to the hungry and satisfy the afflicted soul then your light shall dawn in the darkness and the Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your soul in drought and strengthen so this is This is the type of religion, if you will, that God was calling his people to, and I think in the New Testament we see it summed up more succinctly, that pure religion involves visiting, which includes the idea of studying, looking after, giving careful attention to the afflictions of those who have been orphans and widows, their distresses, their afflictions. We're to study those things, to be aware of, to examine, to look intently is the idea of that. It's not visit just kind of stopping by it's it's an actually getting down on their level and really seeking to to understand them and to to be aware of and Sympathetic to their needs just like Christ is sympathetic to our to our weaknesses And we looked at this verse last time Isaiah 117 learn to do good seek justice help the oppressed and defend and the cause of orphans. And so if you have your rooted study guide, I thought this is a good bridge into the next study on pursuing holistic health, some of the ways that we can do good in helping our kids actually can deal with their practical needs. I was thinking about the concept of what's the greatest commandment that Jesus affirmed in the Bible? Love the Lord your God with what? Your heart, soul, and your mind, or your strength, depending on the translation. And then the second is like it. So it's not unrelated to that, but it's also like that. You're to love your neighbor as yourself. And how do we love ourselves? Wholeheartedly. In fact, Paul talks about no one ever hates his own body, but he nourishes and Cherishes it and then so we're to love our our wives not just as ourselves, but as Christ loved the church And so that's the great challenge for us as husbands, but it's the challenge for all of us as believers We're to love our our neighbors in that same way that we nourish and cherish and and love our own bodies and that includes our body as well as mind soul and spirit and strength and and all those things and so the body and the mind and all of that is a part of is a part of this process here. If you look at page 55 through 56, I think just to give kind of a scriptural framework, if you will, to this idea of exercise, time outside, stimulation, there's just a few minutes we're going to play this clip from a Christian doctor who's also an adoptive parent here. Ecclesiastes is also in this section of scripture. Let's read this out loud together. There is a time for everything and a season for every activity. A time to heal, a time to build, a time to weep, and a time to laugh. A time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them. A time to embrace, a time to mend, a time to be silent, and a time to speak. a time to love. He has made everything beautiful in its time. Banish anxiety from your heart and cast off the troubles of your body. Remember your creator in the days of your youth. And then I don't have the references here, but the New Testament also talks about how bodily exercise is of some value and we're to honor or glorify God with our bodies. We need to have a sound mind. And also Jesus, even as he's teaching people, he was aware of and sensitive to their physical needs and wanting them to be fed and cared for and things like that. So with that in mind, let me play, this is the fourth video, just the first few minutes of it in the series. I'm Dr. Larry Bergstrom. I work at the Mayo Clinic in Scottsdale, Arizona. I have internal medicine, but my specialty practice is integrative medicine, which means I'm the holistic doctor. I treat not only the disease, but I tell people how to become healthy. That's really the goal of what I do. From a conventional medical perspective, everybody assumes that if you fix the disease, everybody's going to be okay. There's many people who come to the Mayo Clinic because they feel bad and all their tests are normal, for example, or they have a disease that we can't cure. The focus of conventional medicine is that we're going to cure that disease, and if we can't do that, we're sort of at a loss at times as to what to do as people. So I turn the question around, I talk to people about how to become healthy rather than just ameliorate your disease. I spend a lot of time talking about exercise, nutrition, and stress reduction, which really aren't part of conventional medicine. Conventional medicine is pills and surgery, so we tend not to talk about these other things, but that's really what we all should be doing. I have two children. Nathan is my oldest. He's 31 and my daughter Lauren is 28. My son lives in Arizona. He's the one with two grandchildren so I get to see my grandchildren. My daughter is married to a fellow in the Air Force so she lives with him in Germany. Susan is a RN. She worked in hospice, but she just retired this year. It's about health, so it's exercise, it's nutrition, stress reduction, which looks differently for children than it does for adults. But I think exercise is really important. My daughter had dyslexia and attention deficit, and we found that Running was an excellent treatment for her attention deficit. She did eventually need stimulant medicine, Adderall, but not until she was a junior in high school, but we were able to manage a lot of her squirreliness just by running. So being active is very important for children. like this. They need to be able to run and they need to be outside. They need to have a lot of stimulation. Diet, I think, is really important. Even though the studies say that this isn't true, my son freaked out when he got red dye and sugar. So we had to watch that sort of thing. He did better when he ate good food regularly. Stress reduction is an individualized thing. Many children, adopted children, have traumatic backgrounds, so that's something you have to work on. But they need ways of learning to calm themselves down. And they don't always have, they've sort of been on their own, so they don't always have these internal controls. No one's really forced them, no one's, they only have internal controls they should put because no one else has shown them that. They weren't comforted when they were upset so they figured out how to turn their emotions off. They have to learn how to express those in a supportive environment. Running is a good thing. I teach people how to breathe in a certain way and I think young kids can figure out how to do that as well. There are certain breathing rates that turn off your sympathetic nervous system can certainly be taught to young children. So alternative medicine makes some definitions. Conventional medicine is Western, based on your diagnosis, all based on measurable things. So if you feel bad, we want to do a lot of tests, blood work, x-rays, examine you, and abnormalities in those tests will give us the name of your disease and then everyone focuses on treating the disease. Complementary medicine are things that you do that are outside mainstream medicine, but we do them along with conventional medicine. So an example would be an essential oil. So you may be taking high blood pressure medicine or other things, but we know that the way we're built that certain odors can create different sensations in your body. For example, lavender is relaxing. And you just breathe that in. Peppermint is good for headaches. There's a whole series of essential oils that have different effects on people. I'm all for that stuff. If it keeps you from taking a pharmaceutical, I think that's good. So, there's a lot in this whole subject that we could get into, and some of it I'm not an expert in, but I bring up these things because scripture actually speaks in terms of the section, your head is injured, your heart is sick, wounds, it talks about things that can help soothe. But I think the key is Isaiah 30, 26, the Lord binds up the brokenness of his people and heals the wounds inflicted and to think about what we can do to heal the wounds. And then Isaiah 57 at the end there talks about, the Lord says, I've seen his ways, but I will heal him. I will lead him and restore comfort to him. Peace to him, says the Lord, and I will heal him. And so just on this section here, I wanted to see if there have been things in this whole realm that you have found helpful in just the calming process. I remember hearing one mom talk about, one of her kids from a trauma background, that when they would get in this, it's almost like the circuit breaker was shut off and the only switch that you could begin to turn things back on for her had to do with breathing. learning how to do certain types of breathing. I don't know if anyone else has learned more about that, but there is scientific evidence, actually, that for certain kids, and it's not a universal thing, but for some kids, that's actually where it has to start with just practical, physical things to get them to a place where they, he talked about the other guy before him, it took a while before he was able to even have that conversation with his kid and really find out what was going on, but learning how to help your kids calm down. Anyone want to share anything helpful that you found in that process? Without sharing too much about your kids, but just helpful things. Well, I know that kids that come from neglect, she's been, her past life before being a mother was being an occupational therapist and did some stuff with pediatrics. And I always wondered about it, but with With one of ours, it's the idea of the deep pressure. I can just watch Jedi when I do that to him. He just calms down, relaxes. So to see it firsthand, you know, the things that she would talk about as sensory integration things, especially when development's happening. Those are real things for children, and depending on what the neglect was during some of those development cycles, it can definitely have that, but I notice that is something that it's just amazing to watch. I can take his arms and just start doing the deep pressure and he'll just almost go relaxed and things like that. So, you know, I always say take it with a grain of salt with some of these things, but there are some techniques that do work and depending on where they're coming from, there can be a lot of things that have to work through for some of that to help them develop the connections for different simulations. Yeah. So one of the things I've done just before we run out of time here is on the, and again, these are areas that I'm still learning about. And some of these I haven't. Like Jason said, there's some things that when I first kind of hear them, I'm a little bit skeptical. These are some things that I actually have think there's some helpful things to learn from, even if there's just like not the whole thing, but a certain part of it. And so these are some videos. If it's more helpful than writing using the URL, I've already got the notes of this online on the sermon audio page. You can just go there and click on them. But here's some. Some videos, these are some short ones. These are just three to six minute videos, but meeting physical needs to help regulate behaviors. Children from hard places, what they need to heal and be whole. Understanding sensory processing. Understanding neurotransmitters. I actually hadn't heard any of these terms until this year, but there's some helpful things there, even for us who, if our kids, that might not be a major thing. I think it is a helpful thing to be aware of and to learn about. And then there's some longer videos on healing, the impact of hard places on the brain, beliefs, body, and behavior. That's a longer video, but helpful. There's especially a section there I put in there, the 30 minutes, the 43 minute mark. But there's also an occupational therapist that talks more about that and nutrition 101. So I give you some of these resources if they're helpful to you. But I want to close with this. what the Proverbs have to say about some practical wisdom from our Father as to how to relate, even in the way we interact with them, to those in need of healing. And this ties in not even primarily with our words, but even our physical bodies and our posture and the way that we're looking at them and relating to them. Let's just read these out loud together. A cheerful look brings joy to the heart. A cheerful heart is good medicine. The tongue of the wise brings healing. A trustworthy envoy or messenger brings healing. Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing. And then the last part there, my words are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body. A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body. And so just as you look at those verses, what are some thoughts that come to mind in what the Proverbs have to say that are good for us to think about in the way we interact with our kids as we go from here and as we go home? What's something that you see right there in the text that you can put into practice? I think a peaceful heart. And they say that because we have our grandson that if we remain calm and gentle and touch, take his hand, that we can draw now in this length of time that we've had. We can draw trust, and we have found that that's really a key to unlocking and getting into his heart. just that gentleness in whatever we do, whatever we say, whatever we say to each other, however we are reacting, but to remain gentle and calm. I find that it gives peace in his heart to be able to trust us. Yeah. I think, too, like one thing I've been really working on with one of my daughters has been helping her stay calm and regulated all day, not that I've accomplished that, but finding ways, like knowing what stresses her out, knowing what... gets her into that mode and helping her, and even sometimes that means changing plans or going to certain activities, because I know that that may set her off. She is a kid that needs exercise, but too much exercise lets her down. So it's like a balance, you know, of really knowing my child so well that I'm constantly kind of reading her and keeping, talking about a peaceful heart or healthy body, helping her to You know, as she's getting older, be aware of those things so she can help herself, too. Something we found helpful in helping them learn to train and calm themselves is an OT recommendation that we got about a year ago. It's just a little box of self-calming cards from Amazon, but it gives a ton of choices, and we have them in a basket accessible. So when she's feeling like she's gonna, that's okay, she'll say, maybe I should look in my basket. And we can look through. And some of the things are simple as I need a snack or draw a picture. But it helps her think, what can I do right now that's going to help me? And that's been really helpful for us. If kids can't read yet, does it have pictures also? It has pictures. And it even has Spanish on the flip side. They're just called self-calming cards. They were really inexpensive from Amazon. And they're a really good aid for us. Yeah, go ahead. This work talks about the tone being like a sweet, like a honeycomb. The idea of playing back a memory, what do I sound like? Not so much what I'm saying. What I'm saying may need to be said. But the tone is not that. Or I'm angry, or I'm upset, or I'm frustrated. The tone in my voice is very sweet. It's not a honeycomb. It doesn't matter what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah. And it's something I don't think we think as much about, even the way we look at, even just the impact of having fun, being cheerful, and how our words can, I mean we understand how our words can tear down, but really even just how the way we speak, how that can bring healing. It's just a good reminder for us as we understand the gospel, the spiritual is most important. We understand the body and the physical is also important in scripture and to not neglect that aspect because that's often the pathway to making spiritual progress. So our time is gone, but good things for us to think about, meditate on. And again, you can look at some of those resources on the back later if you have time. Let's see, Jason, want to close us in prayer? Our dear Heavenly Father, we thank you so much for the things that you're doing, that you've brought us together. We are thankful for Pastor Phil and his lady in here. We just pray that you have given us a lot to think about and resources. I just pray that your voice would help to keep these ideas fresh in our heads. I pray for wisdom and strength from you. I pray for each family in here. and the things that are going on that you would just continue to give strength and more importantly that you would give grace to each to lead out in their families and all the different situations. I thank you so much for the things that you're doing and the resources you've given us here. We're just praying out as we go into corporate worship to prepare our hearts for the things that we would be focused on there through the music and the preaching of your word. May we be encouraged. We just pray for all these things in the name of Jesus. Amen. Amen.