If you have your Bibles, turn with me to the book of Genesis chapter 29, and I will read from verse 31 to 35. Genesis chapter 29, verses 31 to 35. I commence reading from the English Standard Version. When the Lord saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren. And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben. For she said, because the Lord has looked upon my affliction, for now my husband will love me. She conceived again and bore a son and said, because the Lord has heard that I am hated, he has given me this son also. And she called his name Simeon. Again she conceived and bore a son and said, now this time my husband will be attached to me because I've borne him three sons. Therefore his name was called Levi. And she conceived again and bore a son and said, this time I will praise the Lord. Therefore she called his name Judah. Then she seized Bearing. May the Lord add a blessing to the reading of his word and the exposition of the same. Let us look to him in prayer. Father in heaven, we give you thanks for this time in this marriage service. when we can seize from all else and concentrate on the word that we are about to hear, the word that you're about to speak to us. And so may you direct our thoughts and our minds and our attention to yourself and speak, O Lord, that we might hear your voice and let the things that we shall hear speak to each one of us at our respective points of need. To the praise of your name and to the satisfaction of our hearts. Amen. I do believe that many of us who read our Bibles are very familiar with the story of Jacob. Jacob who had stolen from his brother the birthright blessings, and because his brother was seeking after his life for having deceived him in such a manner, he had to take off. He left and went to live with his uncle Laban. and there he discovers that his cousin Rachel was so beautiful and therefore he requested for a hand in marriage. But because Lebanon did not want the older daughter to remain single while the younger one gets married, he schemed to deceive the deceiver Jacob. And so the bridal price that Jacob had to pay was to work seven years in order to have Rachel. And at the end of the seven years of laboring for her, the wedding day arrived and the two supposedly got married. But when it was time for him to discover who it was that he had married, to his shock, he discovered it was the older daughter to Lebanon, Leah. Obviously he was very disappointed. Obviously he was very upset with his uncle and the uncle told him it was not right that the younger one should get married before the older. So if you are willing to marry Rachel, you have to work for me for another seven years. And he did. So he ended up with two wives. Now this passage does not in any way encourage polygamy. This passage is not in any way an endorsement that one is free to marry more than one woman. It is because of the hardness of man's heart and because of depravity and our fallenness that we find such a thing happening, but it is not the ideal at all. And so here is Jacob. He marries both Leah and Rachel. Now, from this marriage and particularly the experience of Lear, there are some lessons that we can draw as we reflect about marriage, as we reflect about life in general. You and me know very well that one of the best teachers that we have is experience. When nothing else can teach us some of life's most important questions, experience will. Because we learn from our own experiences, that makes experience a best teacher. But we know that we cannot experience everything that is there to be experienced in life. So we also learn from the experiences of others and from the life of Leah we are able to learn a number of things. What is it that we can learn from the life of Leah? Not in its entirety, but as we find it in its capsule form in the verses that we have read. Well, the first lesson that I would like us to observe there is the pain of unfulfilled desires. We learn from the life of Leah the pain of unfulfilled desires. Leah has the basic human desire and that basic human desire was to be loved. Every one of us, every human being, if they are breathing and they are honest with themselves, they will admit that we all desire to be loved and to be loved unconditionally, unreservedly, unmistakably, passionately, completely. Whether it is the love of the parents for their children, the love of Christians for one another, but better still, the love of the wife for the husband and the husband for the wife. We want love. We need love. We desire to be loved. There used to be an advert on TV several years ago in a boarding school where it appeared like one of their favorite spreads was not being put on their bread. And so the students rioted in that boarding school and the advert was talking about what they needed. We want buttercup on our breakfast. We want buttercup on our bread. And so on and so it was an advert. And we may well sing that song as well. We want love in our lives. We want to be loved in our lives. That is the basic human need. And where it is lacking, It obviously brings pain. And that was the experience of Leah. That was the experience of this woman in this marriage. The desire to have someone to love you and for you to love another person is a natural desire and a reasonable desire in all of us. But life was very tough for Leah. Life was so hard for this woman. It's not easy being married to someone that you know doesn't love you. See what we are told there in verse 30? So Jacob went into Rachel also, and he loved Rachel more than Leah. He loved Rachel more than Leah. And she probably lived like that for many, many years of their marital life. Now there's something that we are told with regard to these two women, and that takes us back to verse 17. We are told that Leah's eyes were weak. I do not have time to open up what all that means in the original language, except to say that there was something that is pointed out as a negative with respect to Leah. But Rachel, as opposed to Leah, was, as we are told there, beautiful in form and appearance. And so that seems to be the reason why Jacob may have been attracted to Rachel as opposed to Leah. And so he loved the younger one. She was beautiful in form and in appearance. And so in comparison to her younger sister, Leah had her self-esteem dented, her self-esteem damaged. It was at its lowest. And even as she found herself in this marriage, she knew very well that her much more attractive younger sister had won the heart of her husband as opposed to her. And that was painful. I want to believe and trust that Kingsley and Mary, what has brought you together in this union is love. What has made you to come together and to be joined together in this marriage is nothing but love. No doubt that Kingsley is a handsome young man. No doubt that Mary is a stunningly beautiful young lady and there was something that they saw in one another that made their hearts skip a beat. But there is love that has been developing and love that has been growing and love that should remain there. It must not diminish at all because it is painful when this love is not there. In any relationship, it is painful. And so this is a reminder to all of us, a reminder to those of you who are single. And I know there are not a few that are still single here. They are a reminder to all those of us that are married and whatever situation we are in, this is a reminder to us that we must marry the one that we love and love the one that we have been married to. That is a need that we all have to relate to. It is not just about the external beauty. It's about the whole round person that you love unconditionally. The whole round person that you know you are committing your life to and sustain your marriage on the basis of love. The second lesson that we pick out from the life of Leah is the futile search for answers to our disappointment. The futile search for answers to our disappointment. Leah knew that she was not the preferred wife in that marriage. And that is why polygamy is such a sinful thing. Because the husband can never, can never love equally all the women that he is married to. There is always someone that is preferred, and that someone even knows, and the others know that their most preferred one is this one. And so because she knew she was not the most loved in that marriage, what did she do? She began to think of ways in which she was going to win the love of her husband. And obviously she could have tried many things. A good meal. She went through all the recipe books that are out there, googled them if she had internet in those days, cooked the best meals, and still did not work. But there was something that God had given to her. which God withheld from her younger sister. Her younger sister could not have children. Leah was fertile and she could have children. And in the space of four beses, we are told that she gave birth to four sons. Reuben, Simeon, Levi, and Judah. And these are not ordinary fellows, no. We know that one of them became the forerunner, so to say, and the inaugural priest. And it is through his tribe that we had the Levitical priesthood. And it's only people who were born into that tribe emanating from Levi who could become priests. And then, there was Judah. And it is Judah who gives birth to a line of Boaz and a line of David and eventually the line that is traced to the Lord Jesus Christ. What an extraordinary thing that the line of Jesus, the earthly lineage of Jesus goes back to Judah, goes back to Leah, the ugly one, the not so pretty one. And that is what God made her to be. And so because of her ability to bear children, God-given ability, she used that as something that she could try to win the love of her husband. Look at the motives behind Leah's desire for children. And we see that in verse 32 as well as verse 34. What was the primary reason and the desire that she wanted to have as many children in the shortest time possible? Verse 32, And Leah conceived and bore a son, and she called his name Reuben. For she said, Because the Lord has looked upon my affliction, for now my husband will love me. Verse 34, again she conceived and bore a son and said, now this time my husband will be attached to me. My sister cannot have children. My sister is barren. So, the more children I have, the more attached, the more loving my husband is going to be towards me. Did that work? No, it didn't. It didn't. A search for answers to a disappointment, that search was futile and we'll see in the third point that it was futile. Because there are some marriages that remain still strong where there is no child at all. Rachel herself did not have a child up to this time as her older sister was having them like impania, guinea pigs. And her younger sister was still barren, with no child. But Jacob still loved her. Barren, childless, he still loved her. It was a futile search on the part of Leah. More, more children. More and more children. And you will love me. You will be attached to me. No. That's not the foundation of marriage. It's not children that are the foundation of marriage. It is love. Because children are a gift from God. In their presence or in their absence, love must still be there and grow. And so if you begin to establish the basis for sustaining a marriage grounded on the fact that the more children I have, then the more loving my husband would be, then that does not make sense at all. You will soon discover that is a search for love in futility. as Leah soon discovered. But there's a third lesson very, very quickly that we should look to. And it is this, that there's only one place where we can find hope when all else fails. There is only one place where we can find hope when all else fails. And that we see clearly in the very first verse in the passage that we read in verse 31. I don't know how many of us noticed that when I began to read from this passage. Hear me read that again. When the Lord saw that Leah was hated, He opened a womb, but Rachel was barren. When the Lord saw, and therein lies our hope in situations such as Leah's, This is how God comes to the downtrodden. This is how God comes to those who are in painful circumstances. This is how God comes into the situations that look so miserable and hopeless. So that if we ask ourselves, can God work in broken families? Can God work in less than ideal marriages? Can God work where there is strife? Can God work where there is discord, where there is trouble, where there is resentment, where there is frustration and disappointment? Can surely God turn things around in such situations? And the answer is, yes, God can, when the Lord so. And the hope that it gives to us is this. Whatever your situation might be in marriage, God is not ignorant. God is not unaware. God is not totally ignorant of your circumstances. No, He knows, and He knows perfectly well, and that's why He gives us hope. He gives us something to hold on to, to smile about, and something to be an anchor to us in all the circumstances. And soon enough Leah realizes that it's not the number of children that will win the favor and the love of a husband, it's ultimately a relationship with the God who sees and the God who knows. Kingsley and Mary, let it be very clear to you. that there is tension sometimes in marriage, that problems can arise and you have been perfectly counseled as to how to deal with those situations when they arise. But sometimes they will come at a time when you feel like you do not have the resources to be able to cope with whatever situation has come about in your marriage and in your lives. Where is it that you are going to find the hope? It is in the God who knows. The God who sees. Yahweh! And that is the covenant name that is used there in verse 31. When the Lord, in all capital letters, the God who does not change, the God who loves covenantally and with a special love, those that he has called to himself, he knows, he sees, and that's where our hope lies. Now why do I say that Leah came to such a realization that there's only one place where I can run to. It is in the name that she gave to her fourth child, fourth son. And she conceived, verse 35, again and bore a son and said, this time I will praise the Lord. The other times, what was the motive? Oh, my husband, I hope you'll be attached to me. Once he holds this baby, he can see me on it. Nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah, nyah. And then anyway, lovely. Nothing. All roads lead to Rachel's bedroom. Children, close your ears for some vela. And that's all. And she realizes, oh no, it's not about the children. What is it that will give me fullest satisfaction in the absence of these competing demands between my husband and his love for me and his love for my sister? What is it that will give me full joy? She realizes it is God who sees, the God who knows. And that is the one that now she acknowledges here at the birth of Judah, this time. And that is important. This time, and that means she's comparing to the other times. You get the point? The other times, I was doing it to win my husband's affection, but this time, with or without my husband's affection, blessed be the name of the Lord. You hear the language of Job? The Lord gives, the Lord takes away, blessed be his name. And that's the only place where we find stability. That's the only place where we find hope. This time, I will praise the Lord. I don't know where you are in your marriage. After 5 years, 10 years, 15 years, 20, 25, 30, 40 years, or 50 years, I don't know what you are expecting in the years ahead, but you know that there are things that you have to deal with in life, things that you have to deal with in marriage, and you can never deal with them until you come to a place where God is your all-sufficiency. God is your foundation. God is your anchor for your soul. He is the only one to whom you can run. And that is the place that Leah came to. And just to take you a little bit into the future as I conclude, if you know the Bible story of Leah, Rachel and Jacob. Eventually, Rachel would have children and God gave her two children, Joseph. As we come to the end of this chapter, there is a Joseph. And in the next chapter, the last born comes, little Benjamin. And Rachel dies soon after giving birth to Benjamin. The most beloved, the most beautiful wife is the one that God takes away first. And Jacob remains with Leah. And she's buried so far away from her husband who loved her much more than the other. And it is Leah who gets buried side by side with this husband who did not seem to love her as much. What does that say to us? There is nothing that escapes the notice of God, whatever it is that we might go through. And ultimately in this entire story, what God is saying to us is that He is faithful to His promises. He promised that it is through the seed of the woman that we shall all be blessed. He promised that it is through the seed that shall come from Abraham's own bosom that we shall be blessed. And that line is being kept by the God who is faithful. But in the midst of all that, there is an intricate play of romance, of disaster, of pain. And all those things work together for good as God is working day by day and week by week and month by month. We ought to recognize that God works in these kind of circumstances. Sometimes we cry. Sometimes we rejoice. But at the end of the day, ours should be the kind of spirit that later on began to develop in the life of Leah. My life is about God. This time, I will praise the Lord. And Judah is the one through whom the Messiah comes into this world. And the Messiah who will teach us and show to us what love truly is. Without Him, we can never know the fullest extent of God's love for sinners. It is through the Lord Jesus Christ that we see in vivid color that is undeniable that God loves us, that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish. That's how much God loves us, that He doesn't want us to perish, but that we should put our faith in His Son, His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. and that we will have to live eternally. Is the Lord Jesus Christ your Lord and your Savior? Have you surrendered your life to Him? Has He begun to teach you what it means to love someone and to be loved by someone? as He began to teach you that the supreme delight of your heart in this life and the life to come must be nothing but God and God alone. And once we have put God first in our lives, then it becomes so natural and so spontaneous that we will love those that God brings into our lives. And the best expression of love in this world, besides the one that the Lord Jesus Christ has shown to us, is the love between husband and wife. The love between husband and wife. And that is why in the Bible there is even one book that talks about the intimacy, the ecstasy, and the bliss of marital love and union, as we see it in the book of Song of Songs, which is rated PG25. Song of Songs. to teach us that we are to express ourselves in the deepest expressions of love in marital union. And may God bless our hearts with such a love and remind us that unfulfilled desires are painful. that it is futile to search for answers to our disappointment, except those answers must take us back to the one who loves us, and the one who sees, and the one who knows, and that is God himself. Amen. Let us pray together. Our Father in heaven, thank you for reminding us that we all have this basic need of love, to be loved and to love. And where this is lacking, there is pain, there is disappointment, there is frustration, there is everything that can go wrong. Help us, O Lord, to develop and deepen that kind of love. selfless, sacrificial, unconditional, not only in our marriages, but in our families and in our interpersonal relationships, one with another. And this, Lord, we admit can only be done by you, your work in our lives, the spirits prompting in our lives. And so we lift up to your throne of grace. Kingsley and Mary, that in the beginning of this union, you will only cause them to bask in the wonder and the amazement of their ever-growing and deepening love for one another to the glory of your name. And if there be those that are struggling in a dysfunctional relationship, in a dysfunctional family, in a dysfunctional marriage, Lord, your grace is ever sufficient. Let their eyes look to you, the God who cannot fail, to whom all things are possible. We pray and ask in the name of our dear Savior and Lord, even Jesus Christ. Amen.