We have begun to look at the theme of Christians ministering one to another in the fellowship of the gospel. And last night we looked at the principle, one another text from John's gospel and the words of our blessed savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. A new commandment I give unto you that ye love one another as I have loved you. And we continue this afternoon to think of some more one another's. And in fact, this afternoon, you're getting three for the price of one, because we're looking at the very last verse of Ephesians chapter four that we read together earlier, which says this, and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." Now, it's early in the morning, and a woman called Mrs. Stephen slips out of bed to wake her children for their breakfast. It's an important day. One by one, they make it to the table, even little Stephen, who is not yet in school. And they are finished and ready for school, and their mother gives the final instructions. Be home early, for tonight the gospel meeting begins, and we're all going. And they do get home, and supper is ready. She calls the children from the living room, ready before the gospel meeting. But the children sense that there is something on their mother's mind, something troubling her, something that gives her a worried look on her face. And so she finishes getting ready, the little ones, and they make their way. They take a shortcut, as they usually do, to the meeting place because they're a little bit late, but not too late, as the mother points out. Because as they go on this route, they pass the place where their father lost his life. It's the first time they'd seen it, but they didn't want to forget it. It was important to them. And so in the building that they get to, they're shown to their vacant seats. And Mrs. Stephen, she says, sit down to the children, whispers sternly to the young one, Stephen Jr. And the preacher begins his sermon. His sermon has the subject of forgiveness. And the audience seems transfixed, almost hypnotized as they listen intently. And this preacher says, I am the chief of sinners. And Anna, the eldest child, though not a recommended thing for children in church, but she whispers to her mother, Mom, who is the preacher? She had already noticed the tears in her mother's eyes. She says, that's brother Paul of Tarsus. He is the one who helped to kill your father. Forgive one another. Be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ's sake, hath forgiven you. Now, this verse at the end of Ephesians chapter four comes in the first chapter of three of the practical application of the doctrines that Paul had announced in the first three chapters, which includes, and you hath he quickened, who was once dead in trespasses and sins, that by grace ye are saved through faith and that not of yourselves. It is the gift of God, not of works, lest any man should boast. and expounds these doctrines and then comes to apply them in these chapters. And how much application there was in this chapter that we read together from chapter 4, culminating in this last verse, Be ye kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, as God, for Christ's sake, has forgiven you. Now does this verse describe the average person in your circle of acquaintances and particularly amongst the unbelievers. Is it not true that the world is an unkind place? That rather than tenderness and mercy and kindness, you're likely to meet with callous disregard and ruthlessness. And in our society, we're more likely to meet with those who are desperate for compensation following some sort of accident, injury, offense, loss. And one wonders whether the word forgiveness has been deleted from the dictionary. Here in this text, we're exhorted to do three things. be kind one to another, be tender-hearted one to another, and forgive one another, just like Jesus Christ. And these are the basis, then, for our meditation on the fellowship of the gospel this afternoon. We take them one by one. We'll finish with forgiveness. But the other two are foundational also to coming to thinking about forgiveness, be kind one to another. Believers in the Lord Jesus Christ are to be kind one to another with that same principle that we had last night of loving one another as Christ loved us and so showing that we are believers in the Lord Jesus Christ. But that includes being kind one to another. You might even ask, is it possible to love one another without being kind? I think it's possible to be kind to people without loving them. But what does this word kind mean here? It means disposed to do good to someone else. A kind man or woman is useful and helpful to others. It's a characteristic of the loving person to, as Paul says in 1 Corinthians 13, to suffer long as you love and to be kind. The Greek word here for kind is krestos. It appears seven times in the New Testament and it will be helpful to look at each of the times that it occurs. Several ways of being translated. So rich a word this word krestos is. It has a wider meaning to show the way that it's rendered in these other verses and can give us a much bigger picture of what kindness really is that we are to show to each other. In Matthew 11, verse 30, we find Christos used in the words of Christ, where he says in verse 30, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Easy, same word as kind. Because Christ's yoke to the believer is kind. My yoke, says the Lord Jesus Christ, is kindly. you will know that a yoke is a wooden frame. It could be placed around an animal and its shoulders to put it to work, but also a human being could have a yoke on the shoulders to carry weights, equal weights either side to make it easier to carry. However, this did not rule out the possibility that if the burden was so heavy, that the yoke would not be of sufficient help to the person wearing it. They could be bowed down. The yoke itself, the wood itself of the yoke could be heavy on its own without the burdens either side. And so in order to make the carrying task a delight, the yoke must be adjusted to the shoulders, shaped individually, so that it did not chafe. and the burden must not be too heavy." Now, of course, the Lord Jesus Christ was speaking symbolically about this particular yoke, about his kindly yoke. But you know, the Jewish leaders in those days had an unkind yoke that was placed on the shoulders of believers in those days, of Jewish believers, It was the sum total of the obligations of the law, which a person must take on their shoulders, take on themselves, and be bowed down with these burdens. And yet this was an alteration, a misinterpretation, even an augmentation of God's holy law that they brought to the people. And they placed them on the shoulders of the people, metaphorically here. And it was an unkind joke, unwarranted legalism. And the yoke that the Lord Jesus Christ brings and urges the oppressed people to whom he spoke, it was a good, it was a kindly, it was a comfortable yoke. There was still a burden, but it was one that could be worn. And it was a yoke that brought peace and joy, not misery and hardship. The Lord Jesus Christ knew how to be kind, so his yoke is easy. to wear. And then secondly, Luke chapter 5 and verse 39, No man also having drunk old wine straightway desireth new, for he saith, The old is better. Again, this word Christos. Better is kind in the sense that it is fit for use, able to be used. And the character of the wine that is matured is kinder to the palate, so it's said. I have no experience of it, but I'm told that. Kindness is a characteristic, therefore, of a mature Christian person. And I wonder what sort of maturity we have when we apply this to ourselves, of kindness. I speak now to fathers, because there is the story of a little boy who was playing in the room and his father was very near and he ran into his father where his father was praying alone and he wanted to be with his daddy. And the father said to him angrily, go away, don't bother me. And the child found his mother and asked her, what's daddy doing? And his mother knew that her husband was involved in his devotions And she said, Daddy is reading his Bible and praying. Well, why does he do that, says the little boy? Well, it's because he wants to be like the Lord Jesus Christ, seeking to support her husband. And immediately the little boy said, well, he wasn't much like Jesus a minute ago. An unkind rejection of a little lad. could have been handled so much more kindly. And if we want to be like the Lord Jesus Christ, then we need to develop this spirit of kindness, that as we mature, we'll become better. Thirdly, again in Luke's Gospel, in the next chapter, chapter 6 and verse 35, love ye your enemies and do good and lend. hoping for nothing again, and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the highest. For he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. And Luke records this attribute of the kindness of the Lord Jesus Christ who has spiritual children. and calls them to be kind as he is kind. We can also think of Old Testament examples of kindness. We can recall the man Boaz. Because when Ruth and Naomi realized that Boaz was a near kinsman and that he was going to help them, Ruth said this, blessed be he of the Lord who has not left off his kindness to the living and the dead. And Naomi said to her, the man is near of kin to us, one of our next kinsmen, a kind man. And then in 1 Kings 3 and verse 6, Solomon acknowledges God's kindness to David his father. Thou hast kept for him this great kindness that thou hast given him a son to sit on his throne as it is this day. And then we're familiar with Psalm 117. For his merciful kindness is great toward us, and the truth of the Lord endureth forever. Praise you, the Lord. Yes, our God is a kind God. And fourthly, in Paul's writings in Romans 2, verse 4, he asks, despises thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering? not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance. And that word goodness of God is this same Krestos. Kindness. The kindness of God leadeth thee to repentance. Goodness that is the means of leading you and me to repentance. I am often staggered by this. God is kind to us who believe. He is so kind that even when we were dead in our trespasses and sins, in our rebellion against him, in our fist-waving against the Almighty God, what did he do? He was good enough to lead us, to equip us, even to receive the gift of repentance. The waking up process of his Holy Spirit of regeneration is indeed God's goodness. It's his kindness. Oh, are you aware of that? My brother, my sister, you would not be here as a Christian, as a professing Christian, had not God acted. We speak much about him stimulating us by his Holy Spirit and bringing us to see our need of confession of our sin, of conviction of sin, But we don't even have the natural ability to repent. It has to be a gift from the Lord God. How kind our God is. So kind that he helps us to repent. I wonder why it is then that perhaps some who are yet not Christians here in this place have not yet repented and turned to the Lord Jesus Christ. Is it time that you woke up to the fact that the Lord God is calling you to faith in him? and will give you that gift of repentance if only you submit to him and realise it will be for your good. Fifthly, 1 Corinthians 15.33, be not deceived. Evil communications corrupt good manners. And that good there again is kind. Christos. Kind manners. And good manners are as much a part of the Christian life as good will, good faith or even good hope. I wonder how kind we are. The Christian man, the Christian woman should be a kind man, a kind woman, a kind young person. Kind in behaviour, kind in speech, kind in attitude. Christian ethics are not only about campaigning for a law abiding society and justice. It is about living a good and a kind life. It's about being careful in our speech, as this verse says. Let's avoid evil communications, my friends, evil conversations, evil behavior, but rather let us be kind in our manners. This is the application of this very precious word of kindness. And it should be especially amongst us as believers to be kind one to another. Have we been unkind, not only in our attitude, but in our speech to others, in our communications with each other? We were challenged about love last night, but this is an outflowing of love, to be a kind person. Are we known as kind people? Yes, non-Christians can be good and kind. Therefore it's even more important that we who believe are kind people. There was an old lady who used to go and get her stamps every week from a local sub-post office which was run by believing people. And one Christmas she went to the post office and found long queues And a helpful man behind her said, look, over here, my dear, there's a machine where you can get your stamps. And you can save time. You won't have to stand so long in the queue. And there it is. You can get them for yourself. And she says, I know I can get them there. But that machine won't ask me how my arthritis is. It'll not ask me how the family is, how my son, who's far away, has been, and whether I've heard from him. That machine can do nothing that the person behind that till can do, who's always kind to me. 1 Peter 2 verse 3, if so be ye have tasted that the Lord is gracious. There's another rendering of this word, that the Lord is kind. Another angle on this word. So as well as goodness and kindness and better, here it is gracious. To be gracious is to be kind. Be gracious. What is it? Self-giving. It is self-denying. It's not self-getting. To be gracious is to be desiring the best for other people. How we can help them, how we can be near them, how we can assist them and aid them, how we can comfort them. Desiring the best for others and not desiring the worst. The Lord is gracious and he desires the best for his people because he loves them. And this text comes at the end of a short passage encouraging our growth here in 1 Peter 2, as newborn babes desiring the word of God, the sincere, the milk of the word. And those in that position know the grace and the graciousness of God as he feeds and nourishes them. ever kind to his blood-bought children, the kindness of God. And then there's our text that we have here in Ephesians 4 and verse 32 where Paul says that this kindness is amongst the people of God, amongst Christians who love one another, something that should be shown to one another. Be ye kind one to another. So kindness means always being on the lookout how we can help someone else. Kindness means always being on the lookout how we can praise someone in an appropriate way. Encourage them. It's the opposite to resentment and bitterness. Be full of love one for another at every opportunity this text is telling us. Unity implies kindness and love. Amongst those who have been unified by the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, we have been brought into the family of God by a kind saviour, and so he expects us not only to be loving, but to be kind. I wonder if we're prepared to work towards this, my friends, in our fellowships. Ask ourselves, not only are we loving, but are we kind? And if we want deeper unity, we need deeper love and deeper kindness between us. Be ye kind one to another. The text goes on. Be tender-hearted one to another. What a lovely word this is. Tender-hearted. And the word here means Pitiful, compassionate, and merciful. Not pitiful in the sense that we pity someone as if they were below us, but rather feeling with them, alongside them. It's an interesting Greek word, eusplanknos. Another place in the New Testament that it appears in 1 Peter 3.8. Finally, be all of one mind, having compassion one of another. Lovers, brethren, be pitiful, be courteous. It's a feeling of depth for another person. Sometimes we can be very surface in our feelings towards each other. We do not feel deeply what others are going through. And yet there are others who are going through struggles, weaknesses, pains, tragedies in their lives. And we are called to be tender-hearted one towards another. It appears in a parallel passage in Colossians 3. And there's a similar phrase that corresponds to this word here. It is bowels of mercies. Put on, therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, long-suffering, forbearing one another and forgiving one another. If any man have a quarrel against any, even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And this was so important to Paul that it comes here in Ephesians 4, but also in Colossians. And so what is he suggesting here? That the tender-hearted person has good or strong bowels. Now, I'm not being personal here, but the idea of bowels is what the ancients believed to be the seat of the emotions. The seat and the origin of compassionate feelings, somewhere deep down in the abdomen. And that's why they called it bowels of mercies. and who of us have not had that deep sense of emotional stirring in our bodies, in a physical sense, when we feel moved by a tragic situation. I know someone who, when they are moved, just goes like this, tapping the chest, because they are feeling something in the abdomen. Sometimes they will feel it and almost become sick in their stomach for a moment. not just nausea but a sense of a moving within the central part of the body, bowels of mercies, tender heartedness, sometimes a sense of deep yearning with a felt affection that responds in love or pity for the other person. And therefore Paul is encouraging us to feel real and deep, tender love for each other in the church and not be content with surface friendships. Do you have that problem amongst your churches? Surface friendships, we just know each other by just a nodding acquaintance. That takes time. It takes fellowship in the gospel. It takes time to talk with one another. It takes time and not just be prepared to nod or shake a hand and go away. Now I know there's a tradition here amongst you where you want to go away and think about the sermon. But do you ever then meet each other and spend time with each other and share each other's needs and compassion for each other? That's what kindness and tenderheartedness is, being concerned for each other. My brother, my sister, Christ is concerned for you. He has a kindness for you and a tenderheartedness for you and a moving in himself for you. Therefore, can we not have that for each other? We should have it. Sometimes we're confined just to our acquaintance in the fellowship of the Lord's people once a week. A couple of the services, maybe the prayer meeting, the rest of the time, we're not concerned. We ought to be concerned. And this text is teaching that. Sometimes there is intense distress and suffering amongst us, and we need to be prepared to have a tender sense of concern for each other in this. And if we do, then we are obeying this injunction, be tender-hearted to one another. will show in the way of kindness and sympathy. So be kind one to another, be tender-hearted one to another. And now thirdly, these two others have been leading to this one, and that is to be forgiving to one another. But Paul doesn't say it just like that. He says, be forgiving one to another as Christ has forgiven you in God. forgiving one another, even as God, for Christ's sake, has forgiven you. And so one of the practical ways of one anothering is in, therefore, this area of forgiveness. There are times that, frankly, we can get on each other's nerves when our opinions do not always coincide with our fellow members' views. There are times when a hasty word is spoken or an out of place word that causes offence or even thoughtless actions that have not been considered and just are done and it causes offence and hurt. And in such situations this is where this forgiveness comes in. Asking forgiveness and granting forgiveness to another person are the way that peace is made between believers. And we have a pattern set for us already, and it is a perfect pattern according to this text here in Ephesians 4. We need to forgive as God forgives. Unconditionally, finally, and forever. He has remembered our sins no more. They are gone. They are buried in the sea of his not remembering anymore all our sins. That is the quality of forgiveness that comes from Almighty God through his Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, having borne away our sins in his body on the cross so that he can forgive in this unconditional way, consigning them to remembering no more. He's promised ever to do that. So, my brother, my sister, are you prepared to forgive like that? Have you forgiven like that in the past? What do we do? We say, oh yes, brother, sister, I forgive you, but under our breath we say, but I'll be watching out for you, because you might do it again. My friends, that's not true forgiveness. That is not the way that Christ forgives, and that's not a genuine readiness to forgive. The Apostle Peter, in that section of his first letter that I quoted earlier, about having compassion on each other, he says in the following verse, verse nine, not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing, but, contrary-wise, blessing. knowing that ye are there unto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. Peter says that true forgiveness is not retaliation, nor paying back. Rather, we are to repay evil with good, unkindness with kindness, blessing not cursing, accepting not resenting. This is how brethren and sisters are to love, says Peter. They do not have to go around saying all the time, I love you, I love you. No. They can show it. They can demonstrate it by being kind, by being tenderhearted, and most of all, by forgiving, having a forgiving spirit. When this is happening, then others will notice. The Apostle John tells us how the Lord Jesus Christ forgives in that well-known text, 1 John 1, 9. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. And forgiveness and cleansing, here they are in the same text, in the same verse. And the Lord tells us how to forgive, himself tells us. In Luke 17, Jesus says, take heed to yourselves. If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him. And if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent, thou shalt forgive him. Do I or do you come anywhere near this standard that Christ has set for us? Yet we should, if we claim to have renewed minds in the Lord Jesus Christ as Christians, having a truly converted heart that has become tender like Christ's. And that's the kind of heart that the Lord Jesus Christ calls us to have and wants from us, that we may be able to respond to the exhortation in this verse, be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ has forgiven you. And before we close, an illustration from the life of Corrie ten Boom. And she told of not being able to forget a wrong that had been done to her. She said she had forgiven the person, but what she did was kept going over it and over it and rehashing the offence, so much so that she could not sleep. And so Corrie cried out to God for help in putting the problem to rest. And his help, she writes, came in the form of a kindly Lutheran pastor. To whom I confess my failure after two sleepless weeks." And he said this, up in that church tower, nodding out of the window, is a bell which is rung by pulling on a rope. And he says, after the sexton let go of the rope, the bell keeps on swinging. First a ding and then a dong. and slower and slower until there comes the final dong, and it stops. And the pastor said, I believe that the same thing is true of forgiveness. When we forgive, we take our hand off the rope. But if we've been tugging at our grievances for a long time, we mustn't be surprised if those same old angry thoughts keep coming for a while, But, he says, they are just the dings and the dongs of the old bell slowing down. And so it proved to be. Corrie ten Boom says there were a few more midnight reverberations, a couple of dings when the subject came up in her conversations, but the force, which was her willingness in the matter to forgive, had gone out of them. because a new willingness was there to let go. They came less and less often, and the last, they stopped altogether and she was free. And we can trust God not only above our emotions, but also above our thoughts, which can so often come back to us. The multitude of our thoughts, where we need the comforts of God. Let us prove then that we have it in our life together. And as we are kind, as we are compassionate, as we are tender-hearted, and as we are forgiving one another, let us see the deepening of our unity together with other believers. Others will see the same and be drawn to the Lord Jesus Christ, their Saviour too. repenting of their sins. They will want what we have. How these people not only love each other, but how they are kind to each other, how they are tender-hearted within their communications with each other, and how they forgive one another. We need to know the practical outworkings of the Word of God that we have quoted today. Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you. I've explained how he has forgiven us unconditionally. So how real is our forgiveness? How strong is our forgiveness? How genuine is our forgiveness? Now you may know this story, but there was a young man who became very bad in every department of his life. a rebel in every way, almost broke the heart of his parents. His mom also almost died from the strain of it all. And finally, he acted so shamefully that his father asked him to leave the family and to go away. We've done everything in our power for you, but you have disgraced the family, he said, and you're killing your mother. And all that we do for you is a complete waste of time, And I'm sorry, I must ask you to leave our home and never return. And yes, that young man left. And the months and the years went by. And finally, this young man, as he thought about himself and his ways, became not only repentant, but he became homesick. and miserable and felt he couldn't stand it any longer. So he wrote to his mother and he said in this letter, Dear Mother, I am shamed of my awful behaviour at home. I can hardly start to think I must ever see you again. However, I do not know whether or not Dad and you can forgive me. but I will be on the train that passes the bottom of our garden at 10 o'clock next Saturday morning. Now if you can forgive me and if you can possibly take me back, please will you hang out a sheet on the clothesline so that as I go past I'll be able to see it. and I'll know that you have forgiven me, and yes, I will get off at the station and I will come home." Well, what do you think the mother and the father did? Not only did she hang out one sheet, but every sheet, and towel, and pillowcase, and handkerchief, and everything else she had that was white, and put it out in the garden, draped it over the bushes, on the line, and as any way that she could demonstrate it. covered with sheets and towels, and of course he came home to owe such a welcome. It was forgiveness in abundance, real forgiveness, lavish forgiveness, full-hearted forgiveness. And that is the forgiveness that is available to every truly repentant person who comes to the Lord God and seeks his forgiveness. and asks that he will be brought home, that he will be welcomed. And oh, that welcome is so ready through the Lord Jesus Christ, so available through him. That forgiveness, that glorious forgiveness is ours, my friend, in Christ Jesus, because it is as God has forgiven us in his Son, the Lord Jesus Christ, that we have any forgiveness. And if that is true for us, and if we can be moved by these things, therefore, it is our duty, our responsibility, and should be our joy to be able to forgive one another. Let us not look at those hurts that we've had and seek to justify our lack of forgiveness. We must never do that. Jesus does not do that. We must not count up all the times that those people who have irritated us or have sinned against us come to us and ask for forgiveness and we've forgiven them and they've done it again. We cannot do that. We have to forgive as God forgives unconditionally. And sometimes it hurts. And yet there is joy. Joy for the one forgiven because we are forgiven as Christians. But joy for the one who we forgive. or let it be this practical outworking of the Word of God, this kind of forgiveness required of each and every one of us for one another. May the Lord God give us grace to forgive as the Saviour has forgiven us. Amen. Let's pray together.