Well, good morning I'd like to be the first family member to thank you all for coming and supporting my brother on this his special day and his birthday So happy birthday All right, please turn with me if you have your Bibles to the first epistle of John 1st John and chapter 4 I'll begin the reading in verse 7. 1st John chapter 4 beginning at verse 7. Hear now the word of the Lord. Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God because God is love. In this, the love of God was made manifest among us that God sent his only son into the world so that we might live through him. In this love, Not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son to be a propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has seen God. If we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us. By this we know that we abide in him and he in us because he has given us his spirit. And we have seen and testified that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him and he in God. So we have come to know and to believe that love that God has for us. God is love and whoever abides in love abides in God. And God abides in him. By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the Day of Judgment, because as He is also, are we in this world. There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. Fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. And now the verse for this morning. We love because He first loved us. Thus far the reading of God's Holy Word. Let us turn to the Lord in prayer. Our gracious Heavenly Father, We thank you for this day. We pray and ask dear Lord that you may be with us in a special way as we listen to your words from this text. We pray and ask Lord for your blessing to be upon Joe and Kathy as they begin their life together today. For we pray asking all this through Christ our Lord and Savior's name. Amen. I'll read once again verse 19 of 1st John 4. We love because He first loved us. Marriage is the first institution that God created. It is a very important institution. It is so important that the work of Christ is at stake in a Christian marriage. Christian marriages are so key to the kingdom of God because they are used repeatedly as an example of Christ's relationship with his church and even his work. So therefore it is important that Christian marriages are kept strong and reflect what God intended them to be. And also, I would like all of us to keep in mind that we cannot have a good marriage relationship if we do not have a good relationship with God who created marriage. The Apostle Peter says this very clearly in his epistle. He says that unless, speaking especially to the man, unless you honor your wife as the weaker vessel, our prayers will be hindered. We'll find difficulty in praying. We might lose our appetite or even our desire to pray. We might have a sense of not even being heard and we might in fact not see answers to our prayers. See, we cannot grow in our relationship with God if we do not have a good relationship with our wives. If we undermine that relationship, then our relationship with God also will be undermined. So I cannot stress this morning how important the marriage relationship is. And the two of you have chosen a very beautiful verse, one that talks about love. And that's what I'm going to seek to open up in these few moments that we have together. So 1st John 4 verse 19 says, we love because God first loved us. We see firstly that our love is born of God. And so we want to look firstly at the origin of this love. So here's love's origin. He first loved us. That is, God loved us. God is the source of this love. This love comes from God. God loves. God is not just an impassive or unemotional or passionless being. But this love comes from God's own love, which is a love that is self-originated, a love that is self-sustained, that is unbought and spontaneous. The language here that we find in this verse where it says, we love because God first loved us, is very forceful language. It says, we love, this is assuming firstly that we are Christians. We love, we Christians love. This is not because of any credit of our own. but because He first loved us. He is the one who initiated it. And how did He love us? Well, He loved us as we read from verse 7, that He loved us by sending His Son to die on the cross. God first loved us by giving us His only begotten Son to die for our sins. And John 3.16 perfectly puts it, where it says, For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have eternal life. And so from this we see that the cross of Christ is the extreme demonstration of God's love for His people. He loved us, us who are weak and frail, sinners, traitors, and fallen ones. God loved us who want nothing to do with Him. When we were at our very worst, He gave us His very best. 1 John 4 verse 10 says, In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be a propitiation for our sins. This love is all on God's side and none on our side. He loved us, though we were all together unworthy of love. And the Greek here expresses to us here that this love... to do with us. But it was everything to do with God. At a time when we were most unlovable, God loved us by sending His Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. And so this is the origin of love. It is God's love. It begins with God. He first loved us. But secondly, we want to see what this love is. What this love is. Well, the definition I found is that this love here is righteousness and benevolence acting in harmony. See, love is not a feeling that you fall into or out of, but rather it is a commitment. Your love is not something that you give and take based on favorable or unfavorable situations. Love is a deep commitment that is rooted in the love of God. Love is not something that we summon within ourselves, but is something that begins with God. God is the source and initiator of love. And the word for love used in this verse is from the word Agape, which I'm sure we're all familiar with. Agape is a love that you exercise as a choice of your will. It is a love of choice. It is the love of God. It is a love that values and serves unconditionally. It is the way God loved us when we were still sinners. It is to have, if you will, a principled disposition of goodwill towards another person which goes out of its way to promote their welfare at even your own expense. And this definition of love emphasizes that this love, this agape love, is not an impulse that comes from any feelings that we have on the inside. It does not run with our natural inclinations, but it is an action. Agape love is a giving love. This love seeks to give rather than to get. It is a love which gladly and willingly makes sacrifices for others. Agape love keeps on loving even when the person you're loving does not respond in kind. Agape love seeks the good of the other person. It tries to the very utmost of its power to avoid anything that is harmful and offensive or abusive or even demeaning to the other person. And within marriage, within the marriage relationship, this love means that neither husband nor wife belittle each other. Within the marriage relationship, this love does not subject the spouse to any physical, mental, or emotional abuse. Agape love turns the heart towards the other and away from self. And so what does this love look like? Well, we see a picture of this in 1 Corinthians chapter 13 verses 4 through 8. It says, Love is patient and kind. Love does not envy or boast. It is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. It does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. And so I ask this morning, so what? We've seen what this love is. We've seen where it comes from. We've seen its source. And so what? Well, we see that if God first loves us, how ungrateful and unjust will it be if we don't do our part in loving in return. See, God's love to us is the grand motive for us to love one another. 1 John 4 verse 11 says, Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought to love one another. Everyone that loves is born of God. This is the mark of a true believer. This is the mark of a true Christian. And this should never be forgotten. When we are born of God, we love like God loves. We love unconditionally. We love even when it's not deserved. We love when the recipient is at their worst. We love without expecting anything in return. We love sacrificially. We love at our own expense. We love even when we don't feel like loving. We love selflessly. We love, as your verse says, because He first loved us. So this means, Joe and Kathy, that your marriage is to be a Christ-centered marriage. See, a beautiful wedding does not guarantee that you will have a great marriage. It is only the presence of the Lord. It is only a commitment to Him by both of you that guarantees a great marriage. And my dear brother Joe, Here are a few things that I've learned over these past few years. Lead Kathy. Love Kathy. Lead her. Do not be domineering and do not be passive. Lead as a head. There is a huge difference from being a ruler and a head. A head is attached to the body. A head is part of the body and it cares for the body. A ruler is not. Lead as a head leads the body. Lead also as a servant. Christ came to serve and to save. And so we lead by listening. See your beautiful wife here as a wonderful resource. Ask her advice. Listen to her counsel. Love her. Because I know we as men have a tendency not to, and at even a time sadly abuse our position. But I encourage you to love her as your own body. Love your wife as Christ loved the church. This love that you have for Kathy ought to be a priority. Just as Christ put the church first, so you put your wife first. Just as Christ only has eyes for the church, so it should be with you. Sanctify her with your love as Christ does the church. Sacrifice yourself for her, just as Christ gave his life for his church. Do not just say, I love you to her, but show it in practical ways, just as Christ does for the church. Love her, not only when she attracts you, but also when she offends you. Christ is the model of your love. And if someone is to come into your home and watch your marriage, they should be able to leave having seen a wonderful image of the way Christ loves His Church. And now, my dear sister Kathy, we talked about this verse a few months ago, Ephesians 5 verse 22. Wives submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. I read this verse knowing that today this word submission is a very dreadful word. But this word is not meant to cause any fear in any woman. It is not a dictatorship that is being described here in this passage, but rather it is God's design for a healthy marriage. This is so that a woman may flourish in the role that God has designed for her. And the best picture of this type of submission, which the Apostle Paul is talking about here, is seen and modeled in the Lord Jesus Christ in His submission to His Father's will. And why is Christ's submission to His Father's will a good model for any woman to follow? Well, because Christ and the Father are equal. They are essentially equal. The Father and the Son are equal in power and equal in glory. equal in identity, equal in personhood, and equal in essence. And likewise, the man and the woman are essentially equal, like the father and the son are equal. Equal in personhood, equal in identity, equal in essence, and equal in value. And as equal as the father and the son and the spirit are equal, There is no difference at all. Not even an inch of difference. And so it is between the both of you. There is no difference at all. And despite having that equality, we see from the scriptures that the Lord Jesus Christ took on the servant role to the glory of God the Father. This was something that Christ delighted to do, and He spoke about often, especially when we read the Gospel of John. He was equal to the Father throughout His earthly life, but for a limited amount of time, and for a specific purpose, He took on the role as a servant. It was a functional role. He took on the functional role as a servant to fulfill the Father's will to the glory of God and to the salvation of sinners. He submitted himself to the Father's will. And so just as Christ had submitted himself to the will of the Father, so too is the woman called to submit to the headship of her husband for a limited period of time to the glory of God the Father. But at no point does this submission make a woman cease to be essentially equal to the husband. They're always equal. You are both equal. It is just the roles that are different. But I would like to, both of you, to keep this in mind. This is not going to be easy. because both of you have to fulfill the roles that God has given you. This will only be delightful if the man loves his wife as Christ loves the church. And so, Joe and Kathy, we rejoice with you and are thankful for this union that has begun this day. And so I say to you that from this day forward, as you walk down this path of life together, remember the words of your wedding verse. We love because He first loved us. And so go forth and live out the words of your verse. Amen. Let's turn to the Lord in prayer. Our Heavenly Father, we thank you once again for your Word. We thank you once again for this reminder that We love because you first loved us. Thank you for sending your son. Thank you for the gift of the Lord Jesus Christ, for him coming and willing to live the life of a servant. and save us from our sins. We pray, Lord, that the example of the Lord Jesus Christ may be reflected powerfully in the marriage of Joe and Kathy. Please be with them. Please guide them. We pray, Lord, that you may be the center of their marriage, that they may always look to you, always run to you, always keep you first as the foundation upon which they build their marriage. Please bless them. Please help them grow more and more each day in love for each other and in love for you. We thank you also, dear Lord, for all who have come to witness and celebrate with us. Please be with each and everyone gathered here. For we ask this through Christ our Lord and Savior's name. Amen.