All right, let's go ahead and set that to the side. No other hands, very good. We'll have some time for prayer here a little bit later. So tonight, this is our last lesson with this biblical friendship series that we've been on. And next week, we'll be starting a different one. But this one tonight, it's the purpose for and the benefits of biblical relationships. And we've already talked about the purpose a little bit, okay, just kind of a quick little blurb on the purpose. What is the purpose for biblical relationships? Anybody? Ethan. Yes, it's to reflect an image of God, basically. And specifically, as Ethan mentioned, his relationship toward us, and we are reflecting that through our relationships with each other. We could also say it is to reflect the image of God. The image of God is also a message to those that see the image. And I think we had kind of talked about that a little bit last week. Satan's goal, okay, Satan's goal is to distort the image so the message is distorted for what people are seeing. So he distorts the image in any of your relationships in order to, not because he's out to get you, he doesn't care about you, He doesn't care about me, he doesn't care about my relationships that I have with you. He's trying to distort the message that is presented when a relationship is biblical, because when it's biblical, it's giving everyone that sees it a picture of God. So Satan's after that image so he can kill the message. So question for you, did Satan distort the image I'm not gonna ask you to give an example, but think about that. Work, or at home, or someone else, maybe you didn't even talk with them, you just heard. They said something or did something. And saying, use that to distort God's image in your relationship with that person. Let's ask it a different way. Here's the way I did ask it. Did Satan distort the image in any of your relationships? But let's ask that a different way. Did we allow Satan to distort the image in any of our relationships? That's the key right there. Did we allow Satan And a couple of the guys here, they work out at the power plant, okay? I'm sure everyone out there is wonderful and sweet to work for. And they're both laughing right now, okay? But when they go to work, they choose if Satan is going to use what's going on out there to destroy the image and the same thing in our homes, too. So let's have one quick, and then we'll jump into a deeper understanding of the purpose. Hopefully, God, when we're done tonight, we will have an understanding of why our relationships need to be biblical and the benefits of them as well, so that we would be motivated to pursue biblical relationships and not just what is comfortable for us or what meets our needs. In Jesus' name, amen. So the assignment that I sent home earlier today, what would it cost us to have a relationship that reflects the character of God? I know there's a lot of that question, and I didn't explain the question. I didn't want to. I just wanted you to look at that question and then be willing to share your thoughts with that. Relationships that do reflect the character of God, what does it cost us to have that relationship? Anybody? Humility and what? Okay, humility and a surrendered life. Okay, so I'm gonna write that down. Humility and surrendered life, okay. Who else has a suggestion? Sacrifice, okay. And Leonard. Oh, okay, can we say wrong treatment? Okay, being treated wrongly, okay. Okay, who else? What would it cost to have a biblical relationship Yeah, actually, we all do. I saw hands over here. Pat? Ooh, guide to self. Yeah, OK. Guide to self, that's good. Any others? Bill? reflects the character of God, everything. Okay, I'm putting that down. I'll go for that. I'll go for you giving up everything. And then I can watch and see how it works out. Okay, that was good, Bill. Anyone else? Bill kind of just wrapped it all up with a bow at that point. Karen. Yes, very good, thank you. Okay, so I'm looking at this list here. Humility, it's gonna cost us humility to have a relationship that reflects the character of God. We're gonna have to have humility and surrenderedness, and it's going to cost us time. We have to die to self. It's going to cost everything, okay? This is really getting expensive, isn't it? I mean, prior to us delving in or diving into this series here, we all have had some good friendships, right? Good relationships? Were they biblical based on what we have seen? The characteristics of a biblical relationship. That was like two weeks ago. We went through some of those character traits. To make it biblical, we might have to do something else. It's going to cost us more. Is it worth it? What do you think? I'm saying I'm seeing heads go, yes, that's the that's the good church answer. You have to shake your head. Yes. Well, we're in church for that one. Why? Why is it worth it? Okay. Okay. So, if you're a Christian, why is it worth it? Oh, okay. All right. So, we're going to bear more fruit, Nathan. Accountability. Yes, Bill. We're showing obedience, all excellent answers, okay? That's what we're going to answer with this first point. Why is it worth it to go after a biblical friendship, a biblical relationship with those character traits that we looked at a couple of weeks ago? What comes to mind if I tell you that we're going to me at 10 o'clock this Saturday morning, okay? We're going to be at 10 o'clock this Saturday morning, and we're going to go share the gospel with people at the park. What are you picturing in your mind that we're going to do? What do you think? I'm hearing sounds, but Hand out tracts, okay, how many of you were thinking that? We're going to go share the gospel with people at the park at 10 o'clock on Saturday. Well, what else does that mean, right? We're going to go hand out tracts or some kind of literature, okay, to people at the park. Or I tried to motivate you to share the gospel with people at work tomorrow. What would that look like, to share the gospel with people at work tomorrow? Those of you that are working, what would that look like? What are you picturing in your mind, Josh? You're gonna share the gospel with people at work tomorrow. Conversation, okay, Ethan. Conversation, you're speaking words, okay, to people at work. And that's what we're thinking that we need to do when we have this concept of sharing the gospel. We have to speak these words. Take some gospel tracts with you on your way out tonight, perhaps, and we're going to give the gospel to people. Is that true? Is that sharing the gospel? Yes, I don't want you to feel like I'm setting you up with a trick question here. Yes, that is true. We do speak the gospel, Romans chapter 10 and verse 17. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. If you're hearing the word of God, what's coming before you hearing anything? Sound waves, someone speaking the word of God to you, okay? Have you ever heard the expression So is it possible that we can present the gospel without speaking a word? right there. So let's talk about how we paint this picture, okay? We're painting a picture of the gospel. We have this whole palette of colors to choose from, and here's what God calls these colors. In my analogy, God calls them fruits of the Spirit. And we have all of these fruits of the Spirit on our palate, all these different colors, and we're going to paint a picture with them. Galatians 5.22, okay, here's the verse. But the fruit of the Spirit is love and joy and peace and longsuffering. gentleness, goodness, faith, we'll just stop right there. But look at those, okay? It's love, okay? None of us are gonna say we hate people, but we sometimes don't feel love to them, right? Joy, we're not always happy. Peace, full of anxiety and stress, irritation. Which goes into long-suffering. And we don't have any, do we have any young mamas in here? No. So I can use them almost. You're excluded from this right now, okay? These kids, they're driving me crazy. I've told them a thousand times. Long-suffering doesn't respond that way. Husbands and wives, wives and husbands, long-suffering, supreme spirit, gentleness, goodness, faith, those are all fruits of the spirit. So we're painting a picture of the gospel, painting this message for the world to see. Remember I said earlier, Did we allow Satan to disrupt the picture this past week in any of our relationships? We chose. We were going to show those or not. Have you ever seen a perfect relationship between two people? Well, you all just haven't watched me and my wife very long. You don't need to, I'll just tell you straight up, it ain't there. Okay. No, we haven't. Why is that? Why is it we haven't seen that perfect relationship? Two imperfect people. Okay. Yes. It's in nature that's in us. Right. Okay. Here's my answer. It's impossible. for us to show a perfect relationship. At least on our own power, it's impossible. We can't do it. And we keep trying, don't we? You know, I've just got to try harder. I got to measure my words to make sure my words doesn't set this person off or they don't take it the wrong way, which is like really driving yourself crazy if you do that. Because what is the wrong way today might not be the wrong way the next time, and what the right way today is, they might take it the wrong way the next time, depending on how their day's been going, how much sleep they had the night before, whether or not they've got a toothache or whatever else is going on in their life, okay? We can't do it on our own power. It's impossible. That is why biblical friendships need to demonstrate to the world a spiritual unity that is rooted in the supernatural. It's not rooted in us. It's rooted in these fruits of the spirit that are produced by the Holy Spirit, which makes them supernatural. And Jesus, even prays for that picture to be in our lives. In John 17, go ahead and turn there. John 17, this entire chapter, Jesus is praying. And it's an amazing chapter to study sometime, just on your own to look through at different things that he's praying for. He's in the Garden of Gethsemane, so you might know what's about to happen. As soon as he's done praying, he's going to be arrested, and the whole crucifixion thing starts for him. And in this chapter, chapter 17, he prays. He prays for himself first, and then he prays for his disciples. those that are currently followers of him. And then in verse 20, okay, here's verse 20. He says, neither pray I for these alone, for the disciples, but for them also which shall believe on me through their word. So Jesus has just finished praying for his disciples, and he says, I'm not just praying for my disciples, but I'm also praying now for those that are going to become my disciples because of the message of my current disciples. He's praying for those who have not yet come to Christ, beginning there in verse 20, but will come to Christ through the disciples' message. So that would be all of us. Right there at verse 20, he's praying for us and we haven't even been born yet. Here's his request to God for us. Look at verse 21, that they may all be one. The first thing he is praying for future believers is unity, no discord, no division. There's no not getting along. That they all may be one, as thou, Father, art in me, and I in thee. There's unity of the Trinity there. That they also may be one in us. There's more unity he's praying for. He's really kind of stuck on this theme of unity, you think? I wonder why he's praying so hard for people in the future to be unified. Since he's in the future, he knows what they're going to need, perhaps, prayers for unity. And then verse 22, and the glory which thou gavest me, I have given them. so that they may be one even as we are one." There it is. The glory that God gave Jesus, he's shared that glory with us so that we could be one just like he and the Father are one. Reflecting the image that Christ has given us. Another verse, verse 23, Thou and me, that they may be made perfect in one." More unity. There's unity in every verse in this prayer. Why? Why all of this about unity? Here's the rest of the verse. And that the world may know that Thou hast sent me and hast loved them and Thou hast loved me. Every single one of those verses in 20, 21, 22, 23 is praying for unity. Well, it starts in 21, 22, and 23. Unity, unity, unity, unity. Why? So that the world may know, God, that you have sent Jesus and that you have loved them and you have loved me. That's why. Getting along is so important. That's why if we have a little tinge of discord in us towards someone else, whether they're in our home, at work, or church, that's why it is so bad. Because remember, Satan doesn't care about you and your friendships. He's trying to destroy the message. And what's the message that Jesus is laying out here? If we could be unified, biblically unified, the world will see God in us in our relationships, relationships free of discord and disunity. So just a little bit, Satan, we are choosing to let Satan distort that message with just a little bit of discord. The unity, the relationship that Jesus is praying for, That doesn't happen through our generally accepted ways of having what we think is a good relationship. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. We do things for each other. We have common interests. We have a good relationship. Our unity is to be a reflected unity, an image of the Trinity, so to speak. Our unity purchased for us by Christ. It's not achieved by us by trying really, really hard to be a good friend to somebody. This unity has already been purchased for us. And because God is always with us, and the Holy Spirit lives within us, and we are in Christ and Christ is in us, we have that same unity that Christ purchased for us. And we distort the unity that cost Jesus so much for us to have. Our unity is to be reflected from the image that we get from Christ. And so, this unity is something that we experience as we pursue biblical relationships. John 17 and verse, let me see, yep, 23. I wanted to look at that one again. I in them, thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one. Okay. Here's what we have to be careful with our expectations when it comes to relationships. Perfect relationship. Now, I don't know how your marriages were, okay? But I think I can speak for marriages. I'm sure they're all the same because there's a saying, the honeymoon's over. We all know what that means, right? when the couple that just got married and they were so much in love and they think, oh, no, we'll never. I love it when I'm premarital counseling and I did it with you guys. I don't think you guys took this this way, but some I've had before and I'm going through, you know, like a week or two on conflicts, how to handle conflicts. They're like, we would never do this. Yeah, just wait, right? The honeymoon's over. And what happens? We tend to go into like a marriage thinking, oh, everything's going to be perfect. She loves me, I love her. She could do no wrong. Not in my eyes, you know, and I can do no wrong in her eyes. And then, I don't know, one morning she woke up, she must have bumped her head or something and she's not thinking straight. She actually thinks, I did something wrong? What is her problem? Okay, and then we think, oh no, it's ruined. It's never going to be the same again. You know what? Those are based on wrong expectations that we're going to have the perfect relationship. It's kind of like getting the new car, okay, or a new car for you, and it's all clean and shiny, and it's been detailed on the inside by the car dealer, and it's always the same. Well, it was for us when we had kids at home. We'd get another newer vehicle. It's like, okay, kids. You know what the rule is? No eating food on the inside, no drinking beverages. After a while, we'll allow water, maybe, but we're not eating any. If we're on a trip, we'll just pull over on the side of the road and hang your head out the window while you eat your goldfish or something because you're not going to have crumbs in our car. And I'll never forget after we got married, the first car I purchased was a station wagon. Yeah, where did that come from? I grew up in a station wagon. I thought, I'm never going to own a station wagon. Dad, I can't wait to get out of this house because station wagons are stupid. I'm never going to...and the first car I bought as a married man, it was a station wagon because I needed it for my sales, okay? So I had the station wagon. Man, I bought it, got it from a dealership. It was nice. And we're taking our first trip in it up to Michigan to see my parents. And my son's in the back seat in a car seat. Of course, when you're young, you can drive all night. So it's nighttime and we're up there right around Chicago as you start to go east towards Michigan. I don't know the name of the roads, but there is no place to pull over really. And all of a sudden, Oh, no. And so I pulled over up against this concrete wall, okay, as the road was twisting around, and I had enough room to shimmy out my door. I opened up the back door to check on my son. I already knew what had happened, but I didn't realize the extent of it. I think parents, you call this a blowout. You know what I'm thinking? My seats! Oh no, my new car seats! It's getting on my seats! Get it out of here! I'm just going crazy. It's like the car has been ruined. After that, hey, you want a chocolate candy bar? Here you go. Here's a quart of ice cream. Help yourself. Once it's ruined, it's ruined, right? Or, ladies, you get a new couch, same rule, no eating on the new couch, okay? Until you get that first spot on there, it's like, oh, who did this? And everyone in the house knows mama, and they say, I don't know, I don't know how it got there. Because no one's going to lay claim to that. Ruined the new couch, okay? We can sometimes strive for our relationships to be spot-free. Impossible. And you all just told us why earlier, because we're imperfect people and we have sin natures, okay? Our relationships, though, will be perfect. We could have that last verse, verse 23, back up there again. Look at this, "'I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one.'" Our relationships will be perfect, but not on this side of heaven. It's just not going to happen. But biblical relationships on this side of heaven can show the world a picture of that life-changing, hope-giving gospel. Okay, so now it's time for the how. How do our relationships do this? There's two ways. How to present the picture of unity. There's two ways that we can do this. One is within the body of Christ. That's all of us right here. Shouldn't this be the easiest place to do it, by the way, since we're all indwelt by the Holy Spirit? And this has to do with what I'm going to call redeeming ordinary moments. We can show a picture of unity by redeeming ordinary moments in life. This is an absolute statement, and of course we literally can't do this, but never doing anything alone. If you've got to go to the store, call someone to go with you, you know. If you've got to go to the doctor, take someone with you. They can sit in the waiting room with you. Or you go with someone, okay. And some of you, I mean, we could just set up like a, lay out a computer schedule for Armin with all of his doctor visits that he has, right. Of course, we can't literally do that, but the principle is there. We tend to, as believers, okay, this is within the body of Christ, we are the body of Christ, we tend to interact just when we're here on Sunday. And what a shame, people that have the indwelling of the Holy Spirit who can present this picture of the gospel to the world and they never even see us together outside of church. Just something to think about. And then there's what we'll call informal counseling moments. I know there's this scary word, counseling. I'm not a counselor. Yes, you are. Let me show you how, okay? As we're spending time doing life together, we're able to share burdens, encourage one another, call one another to personal holiness, and we're redeeming ordinary moments When we do that, it opens the door for us to be obedient and do the one another's that are in the New Testament. I gave you that list of one another's in your bulletin there. I think it's in the...yes, it is in the bulletin. Like, be at peace with one another. Don't grumble with one another on the front side of that page. The first 13 are all under the category of unity, what Jesus prayed for, okay? Don't bite, devour, consume one another. Be kind, tender-hearted, forgiving to one another. Bear with and forgive one another. Don't complain against one another. I know there are things that you don't like the way I do, and there are things that I don't like about you and the way you do things. Because you're not me, and I'm not you, okay? We're not going to do things the way we think everything should be done. But God gives us guidelines in the Bible for how to coexist and still be able to present picture of the gospel. Love one another, serve one another, regard one another as more important than you are, serve one another. Again, be subject to one another, clothe yourselves in humility, Build up one another. Encourage one another. Build them up instead of tearing them down. I have never heard anyone tear me down to my face. Have you ever heard anyone tear me down when I'm not around? Don't answer that. You'll make me feel bad. But I know it happens. And you've heard other people tear other people down when they're not around. As the body of Christ, we shouldn't be doing that. We're hurting the message of the gospel. Again, Satan doesn't care who we tear down. He could care less if you tear me down or your wife down when you're at work or whatever. He could care less. All he's interested in doing is destroying that message of the gospel. How about outside the body of Christ? When we're outside of church, the world sees Christ in our relationships with each other. outside of the building. Okay? What would that look like for them to see Christ in our relationships outside of the building? Well, for starters, it should look like the way it looks inside the building. In other words, the way we act here should be the way we act outside of here. I'll never forget it. I was at a restaurant here in town years ago, okay, Sunday after church. And all of a sudden, I forget who was with me at this Asian establishment here in town. Might have been you guys. I don't know. It was China Pav. And we're sitting there eating, and all of a sudden, and they were swamped. This was back before COVID, okay? They were swamped. And I heard this yelling. I was in the front of the store or the restaurant. I looked back towards the kitchen and I saw the owner, one of the younger owners, just screaming at a customer. And the customer was screaming at him. And I kind of did this because it was a member of our church. And I was thinking, I hope when they leave, they don't walk by the table and say, hi, pastor. No, please don't associate yourself with me and my church right now, okay? Shouldn't we, outside of this building, act the same way as we do here, okay? It should look like it looks when they're standing right there in the same room with us. It should look the same. So, here's the last question. For how long? How long do we have to do this? You get frustrated, you know? You keep trying and trying and trying and then someone in the relationship stumbles and it's like, Oh, it's ruined. We got to start all over. Why can't we get this right? Why can't I get this right? How long do we have to keep trying to do this? I'm going to give you some great encouragement tonight, until we die. But here's the hope, grace. Every day, God gives grace, the grace of friends or just a friend. He gives us the grace of forgiveness to forgive that person when they wrong us or them to forgive us when we've dropped the ball. He gives us the grace of restoration. He takes something that we blow it and he just puts it back together again. 1 John 1, 9, confess, forsake, he's faithful and just to forgive and to cleanse. Humility, repentance, he forgives and restores. All of those things he gives us in our relationship with him, we have those with him, but he gives them to us also in order for us to give to others, give grace to others. Look back at John 17, if you have your Bibles open. I stopped reading at verse 23. I'm going to read the very next verse that comes after everything we've discussed about these three verses. Father, I will that they also whom thou hast given me be with me where I am that they may behold my glory. which thou hast given me, for thou lovest me before the foundation of the world." Folks, that's the prize right there. That's why we do this until we die. That's the goal, the target, the ending point. God has saved us. The ending point is to see the glory of God, okay? God has saved us, and then he left us here. so that we could paint this picture with our relationships, paint this picture of Him. And then the viewers of this picture, the world, they need to see Jesus. So we speak the message, but the picture of the message is to support the message that we're also speaking. or the message that we say we believe needs to be supported with the right picture too. Let's pray. Father, God, help us with this. This is something, God, I struggle with, we all struggle with in our relationships. But tonight, God, we know the why that we need to do this. which is you tell us we wrestle not against flesh and blood. It is not about me and the other person and who's right and who said what or who said it first and what they meant. All of that is totally irrelevant. It's about Satan trying to destroy the message and we choose to let him do that. Help us to have the humility to win. Beat Satan, in Jesus' name. Amen.