Let's turn now together this morning to Ephesians chapter five. Paul has been speaking to the church in Ephesus, to the church. Up to this point, you know, it's been a letter for the whole church. But now he's going to move to speak specifically to certain people within the church. So the attention is going to go to certain people here and I know that Some of you here aren't wives, and some of you here aren't husbands, and some of you here aren't kids needing to obey their parents anymore or something. You know, I get that. I understand that. But here we are. We're in this text. We're going to follow through and stay in the Word of God. And aren't you glad that there's times that the Word of God just comes and directly speaks to us where we are? And so that's what's happening here. So he's moving to wives, husbands, children, parents, finally employees, employers. So we've got a lot to cover in the next few weeks as we continue to work our way in Ephesians. This morning, we'll read the section on wives and husbands. So I'll read the section on husbands. And through the sermon, we'll have a little bit to say about the husbands today, but mainly it'll be focused on the wives. So let's begin at verse 22. Wives. Submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. The husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its savior. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives. As Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies, he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it just as Christ does the church because we are members of his body. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery, it's profound. And I'm saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each of you Love his wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband. I think this verse 33 is a summary of this text. It lands the plane, as it were. It helps us understand what just was said. Let each of you love his wife as himself, and let his wife see that she respects her husband. Now, I hope you haven't put your Bible away too quickly now. Reach forward again if you did. Turn with me to Genesis 1. And let's go to the original blueprint. For the home, try to get a quick handle on what's taught in Genesis 1 and chapter 2 regarding the home. We'll read verse 26 through 31 of chapter 1, Genesis 1-26, then God said, Let us make man in our image. Of course, we're on the sixth day of creation. After our likeness. and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth. So God created man in his own image. In the image of God, he created him, male, and female, he created him and God blessed them and said to them, be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it. and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heaven and over every living thing that moves on the earth. And God said, behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of the earth and every tree with seed and its fruit you shall have for food and to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the heavens and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that is breath of life, I have given every green plant for food and it was so. And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning the sixth day. So, the plan. The plan of God was that his created male and female would produce children and image God over all creation. and to fill the earth, to multiply. That's the command. Do you see it in verse 28? This is the command, be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth. I mean, how else can God say it? There's boom, boom, boom, right? This is what I want. He created multiple animals, filled the earth with multiple animals. When it came to humanity, He starts with this man, He starts with this woman. He tells them, you go multiply. It's a rather interesting discussion as to why he did it that way. We should take that on sometime. But fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the land. So there's the plan. Image God over all creation. I want you to be image bearers throughout the earth. And so the plan required a physical assignment of having kids. Right? And a spiritual assignment of imaging God. Now, if you're still in chapter one, you might just walk through it with me very quickly. Chapter one, verse four, God saw the first day and said it was good. And then in verse 10, he says, this is good. And then in verse 12, he says, this is good. Are you with me? Verse 18, he says, this is good. Verse 21, he says, this is good. Verse 25, he says, this is good. And then in 31, he said, this is very good. You're keeping track, keeping count, that was seven of them. No surprise there, God's favorite number. Good, good, good, good, good, good, good, very good. So then if you'll travel with me to chapter two, verse 18, we have a problem. Verse 18, then the Lord God said, it's not good. Whoa, what? Something's not good? How can this be? You're talking about your own creation, Lord. There isn't any sin yet, this is chapter two. We're not at chapter three yet. Chapter two, God stands back and goes, this ain't good. Of course, the difference between chapter one and chapter two is chapter two has this focus now on the family, on the husband and the wife and the creation of them. And so it's a different look of the same thing, but you know, a different vantage point as it were. And so he wants to capture our attention and jolt us right now by saying, this isn't good. Well, Lord, help me here. What's not good? Well, the text tells us. It's not good that the man should be alone. What's wrong with the fact that Adam, at this point on day six, in chapter two, is alone? What's wrong? Well, here's two answers. There's probably more, but here's two. It does not image God for man to be alone. God is not alone. We speak of him in three persons. We use that language to try to describe God in his three persons, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. And we've already seen it in chapter one that he keeps referring to himself as let us, let us, let us. And all of a sudden, man's alone? Wait a minute, how is he going to image God if he's alone and God is never alone? See, right? So that's one. And we won't go any deeper than that with it. But here's the second reason. Obviously, God has given man a command to go and multiply and fill the earth, right? Well, he can't. Man already sees that. He's already moved with some jealousy. All the animals, they got a male and female. What's going on here? Male, female, what's going on here? Wait, wait, wait a minute. Where's my female? So God says, this isn't good. So what does God do about it? Well, this is where we pause for a little drum roll here a minute, right? Ta-da, ta-da. Get the trumpets out. Ta-da, ta-da. Here comes the last creation of God on day six. Ta-da, ta-da. woman woman from the rib from the side of the man this is so beautiful isn't this great do you see how god is just magnifying this i mean it's not like he made a mistake in verse 2 uh verse 18 whoops i forgot no he's he's wanting to magnify his plan to bring a man and a woman together to fill the earth with His image. Of course, that right away tells you why, right? Why is our culture so anti-the man, so anti-the woman, and all that she is in her beauty, and all that he is in his position, and the coming together of them, and having kids? Why are we struggling and fussing over abortion, and all this crazy talk about gender stuff, and all this stuff that's going on? The world is just pulling its hair out at God's plan. God has a plan and he will fulfill his plan and he's doing it now here by creating the woman. This is the picture of one who stands alongside of in order to accomplish the command. She is a helper fit for him. What interesting language. I will make him a helper fit. Just right. just right for him. Impossible without her to accomplish the command, impossible. Glorious with her in the accomplishment of the plan. But we leave the glory of chapter two to walk straight into the horror of chapter three, don't we? You know the story of chapter three. Don't need to go there with how broken it all becomes. But before we get to the brokenness, just drop down to verse, what is it, 24? Jesus, I'm sorry, Paul quoted it this morning. Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife. This King James, it says, you will leave so that you can cleave. I love that because it rhymes. This word leave is a very powerful word in the Hebrew. It's get the chainsaw out and cut the limb off. This isn't a little trim job. This is hack it off, get that guy away from mom and dad so that with his bride they can become now their own oneness entity. And so it's always an interesting part of, interesting, always a very powerful and important part of a wedding ceremony when the father brings the bride down and there's this giving away, there's this separation. That moment to me in a wedding is very important. So that they can become one and accomplish the command. Okay, so now we've got chapter three. Got all the brokenness that happens within the home? So horrible is the brokenness that we even end up with a child that's supposed to be imaging God throughout the world is murdered. Terrible, horrible, horrible. So oh Lord, do we need a new plan? Well, of course, we'll go to Ezekiel 36, 23, my favorite verse, a verse I think really helps summarize all that God is planning here. Ezekiel 36, 23, I will vindicate the holiness of my great name, which has been profaned among the nations, in which you have profaned among them, and the nations will know that I am the Lord, declares the Lord God, when through you, note this please, husbands, note this please, wives, through you, I will vindicate my holiness before their eyes when through you, I will use you even though you've blasphemed me, even though you've left me, sinned against me, hung my son on the cross, I will use you to vindicate my holiness before their eyes. So God's ultimate plan is still the same, to display the glorious beauty of his holiness to all the world. So the U turns from the physical people of the promise to those who share the faith of Abraham and by faith become the true Israel. The plan is the same, image God all over the world. Jesus puts it this way, make disciples of all nations. Still with two parts, the spiritual assignment through the church, physical assignment through the home, yes. So this is a call on the Christian home. This plan of God is a call upon your home, husband, your home, wife. Before it was largely a physical command with a spiritual element. Multiply and image me. Now it's largely a spiritual command with still a physical component through the use of the home. We are to multiply from the home. Christians need to watch out for the lie of Satan and purposely end up with small families for some worldly reasons. I'm going to be a little bold here because I think the church has bought into the lie that Christians shouldn't have very many kids. Now, listen. I'm speaking with a broad paintbrush here. I know that many homes don't have any children, haven't been able to have children. Like Abraham and Sarah, I understand that. And some of you, like me, you've lost some children, a miscarriage. You didn't have a large family because God took them to glory earlier than you wanted, earlier than what I wanted. I get that. But I'm not gonna not say what I'm about to say Here's some of the lies that Satan has taught us and our culture has been squeezing into us. First of all, children cost too much, so don't have too many. What? You got more than one? More than two? What are you doing? The earth is too full of people. Really? Well, Genesis 1 told us to multiply. I don't think we're running out of room yet. I think it was Gaddafi, maybe he'll correct me on this, but I think it was Gaddafi years ago said, brothers, we can put down our guns because we've already won the battle. Do the math, he said. They have stopped having children and we are having a lot of children. And the Muslims are multiplying. We are mocked for having, and this is a term I've heard, kid vending machine moms. Well, there's a statement. So the home is critical in God's plan. Children are critical in God's plan. So may God bless us to see the great vision and the great command upon us as the people of God to make Christ known. And one of the ways God is doing that is through the home. And I know he has multiple works for us, you know, us that are singles. We've got work to do too, yeah, amen. But the text today is on the home, so that's where I'm gonna stay, okay? I'm not gonna apologize for it anymore. So the problem, well, sin, self-centeredness, Don't want too many kids, they cost too much. So the first problem was man without woman, he could not obey the command. The second problem that we have now is we have a man without a savior. Same thing, he cannot obey the command. You can't image God without a savior. And so Jesus Christ comes to save his people from their sins that the image of God might be multiplied throughout the earth. So the provision, of course, was Christ. And the example, as we see in our text, is the home. He perfectly submits. He perfectly loves. So I don't know. That's some very quick, treetop comments about the home. leaving out much that could be said. But wives, here's your text this morning. Here's your unique command. Submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. Why? That's why we have the four. So ladies, if you're asking, why do I gotta do this? Here's the reason. For the husband is the head of the wife. This is God's plan. He is to be the leader in the home. He is the one that's responsible. He's in that final position of responsibility. We see that throughout the scriptures. Numerous examples could be had on that. Even as Christ is the head of the church. So there's the picture. Here's the picture. It's Christ as the head of the church. Not a dominating, abusive, hard-headed towards the Church, Christ, but the opposite, one who loves and cares for, nourishes, sees to the needs of, sacrifices for. That's the picture. For Christ is the head of the Church, His body, and is Himself its Savior. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their own husbands. So verse 22, ladies, your unique command. Not because your husband wasn't commanded to be in submission to you. We already see that in verse 21, that there's always this mutual submission amongst ourselves. We saw that last week. He was in a general way as he is to be in mutual submission to everyone, submission to you. But here in the home, there is your command and his command. His command is to love, your command is to submit. You are not commanded in this text to love your husband. I hope that jolts you this morning if you haven't seen that before in your life. You may often say to your husband, I love you. That's wonderful. But the text doesn't require that of you this morning. Other texts do, but not this one. Your unique command is to respect, to submit to your husband. And his unique command is to love you. Husbands, love your wives. So submission, your unique command. What is submission? broad paintbrush definition, coming under the authority of another in order to help accomplish what otherwise would be impossible. So we used that table illustration last week of the base being the wife and the top being the husband. If you want to have a table, you've got to have a top, you've got to have a base. It doesn't work without it. If you turn it upside down, as our culture is trying to do today, it doesn't work. It doesn't work. Or if you just have a top, or if you just have a base, you still do not have a table. What God has brought to us is his plan for a table to have a top and a base, and he said the husband is the top, and the base is the wife. Now, is one better than the other? Of course not. It's not. Different positions? Yes. Different functions? Yes. Better? No. Smarter? No. Is the base smarter than the top? No. Or is the top smarter than, no. No, no, right? No. But both are needed. And when both do their job, you know what you've got? You've got a table. When both do their job, you know what you've got? You've got a home that's functioning in God's plan. And that's a beautiful thing. So verse 33, as I said, is a summary. However, let each of you love his wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband. And the illustration is Christ in the church. Now, why are you given, wives, this unique command? I have three reasons. Why are you given this unique command? From verse 21, out of reverence for Christ. In other words, deep respect for Christ. What does that mean? were to be in submission one to another out of reverence for Christ, out of a deep respect for Christ. Well, he's submissive. And if I think I don't have to be submissive, well then I guess I just thought to myself that I'm better than Christ. I start to belittle Christ. And I start to think to myself, I could live my life different than Christ lived his while I'm supposed to be imaging God. I mean, again, ridiculous, doesn't work. So, out of reverence for Christ. So ladies, what moves you first of all, this is first, these are in order, your reverence for Jesus Christ. I submit to others because Jesus did. It would be disrespectful to Jesus if I thought and behaved without a submissive attitude towards others. So as you submit to Christ out of respect for him, submit to your husband. Number two, because he's the head of the wife. This is a God-appointed position. This is a statement of a God-ordained position in order to give leadership responsibility. The home is not designed by God to be in leadership confusion or conflict or chaos, as our society again today is crying out for. Anyone in leadership is just put down, belittled, right? So that we just increase chaos. That's the goal of evil, chaos. But God brings us good order, good peace, calmness. We understand What's going on? But it also brings an element of fear in the home because, gentlemen, you will give a report for how your home is. If your home's out of order, gentlemen, it's your call. So, ladies, Your husband really needs your help. We will not even consider this morning that since man is the headed, he is smarter than the woman. As I said, those are silly objections from the world. So the third reason is because of his need. Man is in need of a help mate, not a supervisor to accomplish the command of God. So, ladies, I want to try to say to you this morning that the need of your husband is submission, is respect. His unique command to love you, of course, it means that he deeply cares for you. He faithfully seeks your best. He valiantly protects you. He tirelessly provides for you. He proudly cherishes and values you in such an intimate way that you become intimate allies to face the giants in your life together. And God brings you together in such a oneness that you can't divide it. Any morning you could describe the Trinity and its closeness, such as the intimacy and the allying of one another together to be one. Your husband deeply appreciates it when you say, I love you, but I want you to understand something this morning, ladies. That's not the core of his need. The core of his need is to hear you say, you might want to write this down, I am so proud of you. My wife needed me to say, I love you, because why? Because she needed that. She needed that. Is that wrong? Is it wrong for her to have had a need? No, it's not wrong for you to have a need. It's not wrong for your husband to have this need today. He needs to know. I'm proud of you. I remember my grandfather Post, Ralph Post. Loved that guy. What a man of God. He was telling me a story one day about how he had gone to work and mixed some paint. And he mixed it better than anybody else because when he painted the wall at work, it perfectly matched. Silly little story, a little event in his life. But he told me that everybody in the shop said, nobody mixes paint better than Ralph. You see, he got a word of encouragement, a word that supported his, is there such a thing, a good pride, his good ego, that I find to be often very delicate in a man. You can hurt him deeply. And when a man is belittled and when he is scorned and when he is laughed at and when he's kind of treated with a, you know what I mean, ladies? My husband do that. When he hears those kinds of belittling things, you can mark it down. You will receive less love from that man. This is gonna go downhill fast. And it's been a destruction of many, many marriages. Because the wife didn't understand what her husband needed. Needed. He needs to know that you respect him. So, if he hears, if he hears from other ladies that is, his woman's been putting him down and laughing at him it's not gonna go well in the home that hurts at a deep level however when he hears you say to him I am so proud of you. Thank you for doing that. That is awesome. Look at this. Look what you did. Great. Thank you. Wow. This is good. This is great. When he hears that kind of stuff, look out. Look out. He's going to be loving on you. He is. You see, just as Emerson Eggeridge wrote the book, Love and Respect, maybe you've read it. So, so powerful. And he talks about the crazy cycle, that when the wife disrespects her husband, he reacts without love. So without respect, he acts without love. And then when she doesn't get love, she reacts with more disrespect. And then more disrespect breeds less love. And on and on we go, down, down. down. And suddenly we've got a home that's no longer a breeding ground to develop conquerors for Christ. We have this depleted, airs out of the balloon kind of a home. It's just failure. And ladies, I'm going to have to take another step here. If you don't show pride to your man, You'll find it someplace else. And I've seen this over and over in marital counseling. That secretary at work, what's she saying? Oh, nice job, Dave, wow, good job. No, that looks nice. And all of a sudden, all of a sudden, what's happening at work? He's getting built up. He comes home, he gets put down. Where do you think he wants to hang out? So, ladies, you provide for your man at home, he'll be fine at the shop. I'm speaking with a Parade paintbrush and I know there's exceptions galore. I'm talking about the main issue here, the main point. You with me? Give me grace on that, would you? Help me. So your husband deeply appreciates when you say I love you, but at the core of his need, it's I'm proud of you. How are you gonna keep this command, ladies? The answer is by faith, because frankly, your husband doesn't always give you a lot of reasons to be proud. I get that. Gentlemen, let's not make it so hard for our wives to praise us. Let's not make it such that she's gotta go searching for something. Give her endless reasons to be proud of you. Don't make her have to scratch her head to find something. What obstacles are you going to face, ladies? Well, this is unconditional submission, just like he used to love you with unconditional love. Well, won't this just build up an unrighteous pride in my husband? Yeah, maybe, maybe. So what are we going to do now? Throw this text out? He's going to have to deal with that. That's his sin nature. I understand that. But don't take that avenue of excuse. Won't my husband take advantage of me? Yes, that's happened in the past too, hasn't it? Why are ladies so fearful of this command? Because they're under and you can get hurt when you're under. And they have been hurt. And gentlemen, that must not be. What will be the outcome of following the blueprint of God, of being your husband's helpmate? You will help accomplish the command of God to fill this earth with his image. You will help build up and bring out the conqueror that lives in the core of your husband. The need of the hours for our homes and churches is men that are conquerors for God, men that are vibrantly strong because behind them always is this cheerleader of a woman that's just, yes, go, go. I was talking to this man one time, this just popped in my head. He was a car salesman on Division Avenue. And oftentimes, he had somebody in the shop, you know, looking at a car. And the whole boy is taking a long time. Now I'm going to be late for supper. And he'd have to call his wife and say, honey, I'm going to be a little late. Got a guy in the shop. I think he's going to buy this car. And every time, she just lit into him. Can't you ever get home on time? Right? Blah, blah, blah. And he said this to me. I said, Pastor, if just once she would have said to me, honey, you hang in there, come on now, you go sell that car. The potatoes, I'll warm them up, don't worry about the meal. Go for it, honey, go. If she had just said that to me one time. But now they're divorced. And so I'm telling you, there's a great power that you have in this submission. There's a great power, ladies. This is powerful. You can ignite a man of God to serve the Lord as God and to serve you and love you at levels you've never had before if you will obey God's challenging, unique command to you this day. We have a society today of men that are spiritual wimps. For too many homes, it will have to be said, the leader has bought the lie that he cannot lead. And this has its truth. For without God, you can't lead. But with God, through his plan of an empowering wife, he can. He must. Wives, the command before you this morning is not to be weak, but to use your God-given power. God is not commanding you to diminish your power. God is commanding you to direct your power and hold up your husband. If you don't, he will fall. But if you do, he will stand. If you do, he will be one who conquers for Christ. The power to bring real change lies in your hands to submit." Isn't that powerful? I believe that's true. The power is in your hands. to really build up a man of God. And the need of the hour in our churches, in our schools, in our homes, is men of God. Amen? And we're not gonna let little things like a horn distract us. I had the button. No, I'm just kidding. Let's pray. Father, would you bless our homes And Lord, I want to just hasten to say, Lord, where I've just not spoken clearly or I spoke too roughly, pray that there would be, once again, at this church, great grace towards this old preacher. Lord, bless our wives. Your command to them is impossible, as all of your commands are. They can't do this. How can they do this? We know they can't without your help. So be with our wives. Forgive us men for making it so hard. Help us to change so that we can make this a joy to our wife, a delight to our wife, an easy thing. Lord, I know that within this church there's some very godly men. And I know that if we asked them today what's up with that, they would admit readily and quickly it's because of the wife behind them, under them, helping them, cheerleading them on. Lord, thank you for our wives in this church. Thank you. Thank you for our homes. We pray that you would protect us from all this, all these voices from the world that are trying to tell us how to run the home instead of listening to you. Father, even in our brokenness, help us to trust you, we pray. Thank you again for this text, for the truth that's in it, the power that's in it. Thank you, Lord, for being with us this morning and helping us see once again Christ and his love for his people and how he so desires for our lives to be filled with joy and peace instead of chaos and arguing and bitterness and belittling. Lord, remove that from us. Father, perhaps this morning, A husband or a wife here left the home in a bit of an argument. Just not seeing eye to eye on something, maybe something left over from yesterday, still lingering. It's weakened their closeness. I pray you'd bring them back together very quickly this afternoon in a powerful way. Help them to just communicate their love and their pride for each other today. Oh Lord, again, thank you for being with us this morning and opening your word to us.