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All throughout the Word of God
you find many references to the tongue. You find lots of references
to the words that come out of individuals' mouths. It's interesting
to me to note that the different individuals who encountered God
in the Old Testament gained a much greater sensitivity about their
mouth. For example, Job's theology changed
at the end of Job after he was asked a series of questions.
You may recall the passage where he said that his theology was
built upon everything that he had heard. But all of that changed
when he said, mine eye seeth thee. His theology changed greatly
but in his remorse he said, I have uttered things that I understood
not. I spoke about things of which
I was ignorant. We've all done that. If I could
take back the problems that I have had as a result of things I've
said, I would have a problem-free ministry. I have, I joked with
an individual, for years I kind of developed the saying, seldom
have I been caught speechless, many times I wish I would have.
And I joked for years that I would have that put on a t-shirt. Lo
and behold, someone actually sent me that on a t-shirt in
the mail, and seldom have I been caught speechless. It's rare
that I'm going to be caught speechless, very rare. It does happen, but
it is rare, but it has been far too many times when I wish I
had been caught speechless, when I wish I did not say what came
to mind. Isaiah, when he saw the Lord
high and lifted up in Isaiah chapter number 6, he immediately
responded by crying out, Woe is me, for I am undone, because
I am a man of unclean lips. I dwell in the midst of a people
of unclean lips, for mine eyes have seen the King, the Lord
of hosts. Words have a very unique power,
the greatness of which I think is seldom considered. In fact,
power of a person's words far exceeds physical strength. The
irony of the power of words is that the physically weakest individual
is actually capable of the greatest damage by the words or the manner
in which he chooses to speak them. At times we read of examples
in which words were chosen wisely. They made a tremendous impact
on the hearers. At other times we discover words
were not chosen wisely and they actually made a negative impact
on the hearers. You find examples of this both
in secular as well as biblical history. Compare for example
Winston Churchill and Adolf Hitler, two individuals who lived at
the same time, both of whom were capable by their speeches to
wield great influence and affect nations. But yet they use their
tongue in two polar opposite ways. Proverbs chapter 18 and
verse 21 reminds us that death and life are in the power of
the tongue. I think that probably everyone
here has a desire to make a positive impact for Christ. You may not
know the exact plan of what God is going to be doing, but your
desire is to receive a degree, to receive training that will
enhance your effectiveness to be able to serve him. You may
spend years studying and even achieving good grades. You may
graduate with multiple degrees. You may receive glowing recommendations
for ministry. But can I tell you that if you
wish to minister effectively to people, and that should incidentally
be the heartbeat of every one of us as believers, not just
those training for full-time service. We're all to be involved
in the ministry. But if you wish to be effective
for Christ, you have to learn to speak effectively. And I'm
not speaking this morning on the mechanics of effective speech. I'm speaking on the manner of
effective speech. How I go and say things. Because if we wish to make an
impact for God, we have to develop and exhibit the qualities of
sound speech. I've entitled this message, The
Balances of Sound Speech. Often a person who embraces extreme
positions, errors. I have seen this time after time
after time. It's true theologically, you
take theological extreme positions and you're 99.9% of the time
going to be wrong. The balance has to be there.
You take extreme positions practically and oftentimes you're going to
be wrong. There has to be balance when
it comes to your theology and there has to be balance when
it comes to your practice. When you adopt the extremes of
things, you oftentimes begin to create all sorts of unnecessary
problems. But one of those areas that has
to be balanced is our speech. And there are three different
tensions that we will discuss here in this message tonight,
or this morning rather, that I believe sound speech is going
to successfully balance. So let's begin. Number one, sound
speech balances accuracy of content with spirit of delivery. Sound
speech balances accuracy of content with spirit of delivery. I've
had you turn to Titus chapter 2. Paul has assigned Titus to
a ministry on the island of Crete. It is an island that is located
off the Southeast edge of Greece. His ministry though was definitely
not one for the faint of heart. In fact, it included correcting
a number of problems. Paul said in Titus chapter one
in verse five, this is why I left you here. He said, I left you
here so that you would set in order the things that are wanting.
I want you to set in order things that are undone. Well, that sounds
like a lot of fun, doesn't it? Let me just tell you, that's
ministry, okay? And I've been around it for all
of my life and that's it, okay? If your idea of ministry is a
glowing picture of 8 to 5 in your office with no interruptions
Monday through Friday, You are going to have a really hard reality
check one day, and I hope it happens before you graduate,
okay? Because ministry is a lot of
work. It is getting dirty a lot of times. It is setting in order
things that are lacking. Have you ever tried to get someone
to do what they don't want to do? That's ministry and that's
typically why things are lacking because they didn't want to do
it. The exciting things are typically not lacking. I left you there
so that you could set in order the things that are undone and
I also left you there says Paul in Titus 1 in verse 5 so that
you could ordain elders in every city. Quite a responsibility. I would say it's a rather broad
ministry description. As you get into Titus chapter
number two, you find where Titus is instructed. There are certain
groups of people that you need to say certain things to, the
older men and the older women, as well as the younger women
and the younger men, even including servants and pastors. Right in
the middle of that conversation or that instruction we find Titus
chapter 2 and verse number 7 where he addresses Titus specifically.
He says, Titus, if you want to be effective in ministry, you're
going to have to be exemplary. It says in verse 7, in all things
showing thyself a pattern of good works. You're going to have
to exemplify what it means to have godly conduct. in doctrine
showing uncorruptedness, gravity and sincerity. But not only do
you need to exemplify godly conduct but you also need to exemplify
sound speech. Verse number 8, sound a speech
that cannot be condemned. That he that is of the contrary
part may be ashamed having no evil thing to say of you. The
word that is translated speech is the well-known word logos.
It describes the means whereby the mind expresses itself. There's a thought that comes
into your mind, good, bad, or indifferent, and you express
that. You express that thought by means
of your words. this particular context, it is
probably best understood as being equivalent to the message that
Titus is going to communicate. It's interesting to me in verse
number 8 that Paul does not really address the content of the message. Verse 7 does speak more of maintaining
right doctrine, but that is not the focus of verse number 8.
The focus of verse 8 is on the manner in which this message
is going to be communicated. You need to communicate this
message, this word, and you need to do so with soundness. It needs
to be sound. It needs to be something that
is healthy. It needs to make its desired
impact. Do you realize that it is possible
for a person to be right in the content of his message and still
ineffective in his communication of that message? There are people
who have all of their T's crossed and their I's dotted as far as
the content of the message. but the manner in which they
communicate that message is a manner that is unhealthy and the result
of that is inevitably going to be that it is ineffective. Now
you might be sitting here thinking, okay, well, I'm not a preacher
and I'm not going to be communicating a message. You are going to be
communicating a message because anytime that you communicate,
you are communicating a message. I won't ask for a show of hands
because this would not apply at a college such as this, but
my guess is some of you have roommates that irritate you.
I know it's shocking, it doesn't happen here. Some of the other
schools I have heard of that kind of thing. Roommates who
really irritate you and you would like for certain things to change. How do you go about trying to
make that change? Be careful. Never in my wildest
imaginations would I have had the privilege of being a dad
of three daughters. My family is four boys, I was
the youngest of four, my wife is the only daughter in her family,
she was the middle, younger and older brother, and we fully expected
boys. I've learned, I am learning,
I have not yet learned, the importance of communicating my message to
my daughters. I love them dearly. But oh, have
there been the times when the tears have flown. They would
come down the stairs. Daddy, daddy, how do I look? You can't answer that question.
I'm just going to say that. So I didn't. That was still the wrong answer.
There was no way for me to win this. Turn around, tears would start
flowing. Mommy, Daddy said I'm ugly. They didn't say you're
ugly, but that outfit is ugly. You're going to put words in
my mouth and let me at least go ahead and fill this in. I
finally reached the point with my daughters where they still
to this day would know this saying and now they're 22 and 20 and
18. Never ask a question that you
don't want answered. If you're going to ask me how
your hair looks, that's fine, but I'm going to tell you how
I think your hair looks. If it looks nice, I'll tell you
that. If I don't think it looks nice, I'm going to tell you.
It's been a rough growing up process for me. How we communicate that message
is so critical. Because if we don't do this with
a proper demeanor, our message is ineffective. I want you to
think about the people God's brought into your life. Think
about the unsaved with whom you work. Communicate the message
soundly. Be smart in how you share the
plan of salvation. You may have the Romans road
memorized, highlighted, marked in your Bible and everything.
That person may simply need someone to talk to. Accuracy of content is of little
value without proper demeanor in delivery. Let me say it again,
accuracy of content is of little value without proper demeanor
in delivery. Paul says you need to have sound
speech that cannot be condemned. It's a translation of one word
and it suggests that it has no legitimate basis for attack. Now to be clear, it does not
mean that there will not be an attack made. People are not always going to
say nice things about you. But what they say ought to not
hold any weight. The idea with the word pictures
a person who is actually acquitted in a trial. Here's the statement
that was made and when the evidence is considered, the verdict is
rendered this man is innocent of that. The statement is still
going to be made. And again, I would challenge
if your idea of ministry is that everyone's going to love you, go back to your dorm room and
find out how well that's working because that's probably going
to be it on a much grander scale. Not everyone is going to love
you. Not everyone is going to think you're doing the greatest
thing. Not everyone is going to say positive things about
you. But you ought to have a lifestyle. and a manner of speaking that
those things that are said about you have no basis. They end up
proving to be illegitimate in the end. The reason that Titus
is to ensure that his message is healthy and unable to be attacked
is stated for us at the end of verse 8, that he that is of the
contrary part may be ashamed. having no evil thing to say of
you. A person who is of the contrary part is a person who is in opposition. This opposition is not in personal
opposition to you. This opposition is ultimately
in opposition to God. We're not identifying the enemy. Oh yeah, he's the enemy in my
church. No, he's a person. He needs to be ministered to.
It might be challenging, but you've got to adopt the right
mindset. He's not in opposition to me.
If I am sharing the word of God, ultimately his opposition is
with God. This is the person who is of the contrary part.
What do we do with that person? I just want him out of the church.
I tell you, yeah, you let him come into my office and I'll
tell him a thing or two. I got a few things I'd like to
say to him. Now, to be clear, I've had those conversations
with people where it's, listen, I've got a few things I need
to say to you. I'm not saying that there aren't times where
these conversations do not have to take place because there are
those times. What you're doing is not right.
How you are acting in this church is not right and this is not
going to be tolerated. There are times for that. But
Paul says, Titus, you need to have sound speech that can't
be condemned so that your opponent may be ashamed. So that those
who are in opposition would actually be put to shame. You realize
that if Titus were to ignore the importance of the manner
in which his message was conveyed, he could possibly create a situation
in which those who are in opposition would actually be validated or
perhaps emboldened. I told you that preacher was
like that. I told you she was like that. Ladies, if you end
up marrying somebody who's in the ministry, be careful when
your husband is the one who's the person who's being attacked. Your immediate reaction is going
to be to want to respond in defense. Tame down. He doesn't need two
fights. Okay? And that really is typically
what's going to end up happening. Just settle down and let the
situation get resolved, but we don't need to compound it and
have two problems. I can't believe he said that
about you. to stay out of that. Sound speech that cannot be condemned. Clearly from this passage it
becomes evident that the effectiveness of one's message is directly
linked to the manner in which he delivers it. He concludes having no evil thing
to say of you probably because he has no evil thing to say of
you. They didn't have anything evil to say. Now I don't know
about you, but I want that kind of a tongue. I've got the other, unfortunately. My daughters can all attest to
that, now you all can as well. Should have heard that chapel
speaker, he said his daughters were ugly. No, he did not say
that, okay? Boy, I put in some pretty ugly
situations. What do you do, I'm gonna go
back to this here for a minute, I got just 30 seconds. What do you do when
they're wearing navy blue shirt and navy blue pants or navy blue
skirt? You tell me what do you do. Exactly, thank you, now I
don't look quite so bad. These are not the same colors,
okay, this doesn't match. No, I'm free. All right, so you
look at it and you say, all right, here's how we have to learn to
speech. This is the manner in which we
say things. Titus. You can give all of this
instruction to the young men, to the older men, to the younger
women, to the older women, to the servants and the masters,
but you need to exemplify good conduct, verse seven. And you
need to exemplify sound speech. When you are communicating this
message, Titus, you need to do so in a healthy manner. in order
that people have no legitimate basis to attack, not just the
content of what you said, but the manner in which you said
it. And when it's all said and done, those who are in opposition
to you, if you've done this correctly, will have nothing evil, nothing
bad to say concerning you. Sound of speech, not only does
it balance accuracy of content with delivery, but the balance
of sound of speech also balances graciousness of character with
perception of need. I wanna turn to Colossians chapter
four. Originally, this was the only
text I was going to be in. Sound of speech, secondly, balances
graciousness of character with perception of need. Colossians
chapter 4, if you look at the context of verse 6, you find
that it is within the context of advancing the kingdom of God
through our witness. Paul even asks that these believers
pray for him that he would be given an opportunity to be able
to speak the mystery of Christ But it's interesting, even Paul
recognized the importance of the manner in which he speaks,
verse four, that I may make it manifest as I ought to speak. Never thought of Paul needing
boldness, but he prays for that in Ephesians 6. Paul says, I
want you to pray that I'm given the opportunity, but I also want
you to pray that I make it known properly. And so within the context
of this, he gives the instruction in verse five to walk in wisdom
toward them that are without. Be conscious of how you act around
the unsaved, redeeming the time, making the most of the opportunities.
And then he gives us this insight in verse six. Let your speech
be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how
ye ought to answer every man." In large part, we might say the
focus of Colossians 4, 2-6 is on establishing good relationships
with individuals, including those who are outside the church. These relationships necessitate
that we engage in regular conversation. but we do so with an intent praying
for opportunities to be able to share the gospel message.
It's okay to talk about normal things, okay? You don't have to walk
up to somebody and immediately start the plan of salvation.
Hi, my name's Dan. I want you to know God loved
you. It's okay to talk about normal things, to look for opportunities. and to pray for God to direct
opportunities. You may discover they're already
saved. You may discover they've got tremendous hurts that you
knew nothing about. Be real with people. Let them
know how much you truly care about them. And part of that
is developing relationships. But what we find with the content
of our words, if you are taking notes, letter A under point number
two would be this. Words must maintain a graciousness
of character. Words must maintain a graciousness
of character. The Bible says, let your speech
be always with grace. That word always suggests always
or at all times. At all times, your speech, my
speech, is to be gracious. So does God permit a single moment
of speech that is ungracious? Kind of hard to argue that, isn't
it? I sure feel better though after I said that. Do you realize
the Bible never permits an individual to vent, fly off the handle,
or say whatever comes to mind? Well, I just needed to get it
off my chest. Why were you even thinking that
way to begin with? That's the biblical response. It's really
hard to suggest that I've got the right to just say whatever
comes to my mind when I read of the phrase temperance or self-control
in the Bible. It's the fruit of the Spirit.
The idea then that I can just vent and say whatever comes to
my mind or exhibit a total lack of self-control is something
that should never characterize us. Gracious speech, on the other
hand, is to characterize us at all times. So what does it mean
to have speech that is characterized by graciousness? Let me give
you five things. This first one is the really
intelligent one. Gracious words, number one, reflect
the work of God's grace. told you is really powerful,
really intelligent. It took me all night to think
of that. Gracious words reflect the work of God's grace. Why do I say that? Because if
you are a believer, you are a transformed person. You are different. Your outlook is different, your
life is different, and your speech is to be different. I've heard
far too many professing believers have a mouth that doesn't sound
as though they have experienced the work of God's grace in their
hearts. Now they'll show up to church and they'll check off
all their duties for the week, but their mouth reveals something
much differently. What about the scribes and the
Pharisees? They knew the law. knew it better than you and I
know it. They were experts in Old Testament Scripture. But
listen to how they spoke to Jesus. Their words did not reflect the
work of God's grace. You've probably heard the saying,
give a man enough rope and he'll eventually hang himself. Let
a person talk long enough. and they'll eventually reveal
themselves. Just sit back and listen. If my speech is to display the
work of God's grace, then I cannot speak words of bitterness, anger,
or condescension. Because it starts with this premise,
I am what I am by the grace of God. You are what you are by
the grace of God. The ground is level at the foot
of the cross. We all start at the same place. Number two, gracious
words seek only the well-being of others. Gracious words seek
only the well-being of others. It goes to say that if my words
are seeking the well-being of others, naturally, I'm going
to avoid all forms of speech that is destructive in its nature. So I'm going to avoid anger.
I'm going to avoid slander. And I'm going to avoid gossip.
Every morning I do a devotional online and just am going through
the book of James and just finished the section of the tongue in
James chapter 3. I wasn't even convicted by it
in the least bit, I'm teasing, but what a challenging passage
of Scripture that that is. One of the thoughts though that
really struck me is how much do I spend time talking about
somebody else? How much of our conversations
are geared about whoever it might be? It reveals a heart problem. If my speech seeks only the well-being
of others, then I will avoid anything that is destructive
or detrimental to them. Number three, gracious words
seek only the glory of God. Gracious words seek only the
glory of God. Bible tells us there are certain
things that God hates. God hates pride. God hates selfishness. God hates the concept of self-advancement. I often use my tongue to make
myself look better in the eyes of everyone else. When I do so, I'm no longer seeking
the glory of God, I'm seeking my glory. I joked with Dr. Beale that I had an introduction
all written out for him to say about me. It was very glowing. Amazing how wonderful of a person
I am. He didn't read it, needless to
say. But it's okay, he still has a copy of it, maybe he'll
read it next time. What's the purpose of all of those things?
Do I have to tell someone else how great of a person I am? Far
too many preachers are focused on themselves and not on the
glory of God. Our gracious words should seek only the glory of
God. Number four, gracious words seek only that which advances
God's kingdom. Gracious words seek only that
which advances God's kingdom. There are some things that we
say that are a detriment to the cause of Jesus Christ. We get
our focus all caught up on how it affects me and what it's doing
to me or my reputation. Let's think bigger than that.
What's it doing to the cause of Jesus Christ? Sound speech will strive to avoid
anything that hinders the advancement of God's kingdom. Number five,
gracious words reflect an abundance of God's word. Gracious words
reflect an abundance of God's words, Colossians chapter 3 and
verse 16. Let the word of Christ dwell
in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one
another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing
with grace in your hearts to the Lord. You can tell, as well as I can
tell, someone who spent time with the Lord. It may not be, by the way, that
they advanced a bookmark. It may be that they read one
verse and pondered it for a considerable time. But you can tell they spent
time with the Lord. Why? Because their speech gives
that away. Not only must words maintain
a graciousness of character, but letter B under the outline,
words must be perceptive of need. Let your speech be always with
grace. Now notice seasoned with salt. It's a lot of discussion
as to all that is meant with salt. Salt was a commodity then
of immeasurable value. In fact, even slaves were sold
within the Roman Empire because of salt and the value that it
had to that society. was used for a variety of purposes. Often we think of it as a preservative. It was a purifying agent. Babies were rubbed in it, kind
of interestingly. 2 Kings 2 indicates that Elisha
purified a polluted spring with salt. But among other things,
it was used as a seasoning agent. What does it mean to have speech
then that's characterized with salt? Well, I think it would
suggest that, number one, our words are to be life-preserving.
I already mentioned Proverbs 18
and verse number 21 where the Bible tells us that death and
life are in the power of the tongue. With that little member
of your body, you've got the ability to tear someone down,
or you've got the ability to lift someone up. As believers,
our words ought to be life-preserving. It ought to preserve life, not
destroy it. Number two, our words should
be purifying. Speech that is not purifying
is by default corrupting. James wrote in James 3, out of
the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these
things ought not so to be. Doth a fountain or a spring send
forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? The answer
is no, it can't. Can the fig tree, my brethren,
bear olive berries? Again, no. Can a vine figs? Again, no. So can no fountain
yield both salt water and flesh. If what comes out of the headwaters
is corrupt, what is it downstream? It's still corrupt. It's not
better. It's actually going to be worse
because it picked up more corruption on the way down. Our speech,
our words ought to be purifying. Thirdly, our words ought to be
enhancing. If we were to ask Chef Marco
if he uses salt, I think the answer is going to be yes. In
fact, well, he's got the Italian flair, so I can't say this completely
true, but I'll bet salt is going to be one of his top five Flavor
enhances. What happens if he doesn't use
salt? Everybody else uses salt. And after we've salted it enough,
we tell him how good his meal was. Prior to our salting it,
no. Some of you have perhaps, no,
I should not say this, never mind. Message on speech. What would happen? What would
happen if we were to take the entire bag of salt and pour the
entire bag on one hamburger? Is it enhancing? What happens with too much salt?
It becomes quite offensive and might even lead to death. You know, sometimes you don't
need to say what comes to mind. I'm learning this. When the proper amount of salt
is used, flavors are enhanced. When you are dealing with people,
discern how much salt to use. Don't just pour it all on. It
doesn't need that much. Seasoned with salt. I've heard
people, oh, I just tell it like it is. Well, stop. Very simple. Because your acting
like that is detrimental. It's detrimental to the cause
of Christ. It's offensive to people. And to be quite honest
with you, it's irritating. So stop. Nobody needs to hear
that. Nobody wants to hear that. It
doesn't do any good. Salt is used to enhance flavor. When you have the right amount
of salt added to your speech, it is effective. It is, to use
the analogy, flavorful. Number four, our words are to
reflect our responsibility. Jesus described his disciples
repeatedly as the salt of the earth. Wouldn't it be fitting
then for our words to reflect our responsibility? So we've noted that sound speech
balances accuracy of content with spirit of delivery. We've
noted that it balances graciousness of character with perception
of need. It's to always be with grace at all times and seasoned
with salt. Number three, sound speech balances
the issues of the temporal with the reality of the eternal. He
says in verse number six that ye may know how ye ought to answer
every man. Here's the result of effective
speech. Maybe the purpose of it doesn't
really make much difference. Let your speech be always with
grace, seasoned with salt, in order that, or for the purpose
that, you may know how you ought to answer every man. Let me say
that if your speech is not characterized by graciousness and is not seasoned
with salt, you are a hindrance to the spread of the gospel.
Much of our speech is unfortunately focused on the wrong thing. I would rather make my point
than disciple a believer. I would rather be certain that
I'm right than to be right with God. I would rather give them
a piece of my mind than the message of salvation. I would rather
prove my point than demonstrate God's love. What's the problem? I've developed a wrong focus
on the temporal, and I've lost sight of the eternal. The person
with whom you are speaking is going to spend an eternity somewhere. I don't want my words to be a
hindrance to the cause of Jesus Christ. I don't want to substitute
the temporal and get my point across at the expense of the
eternal. Let me close with a word of prayer
and we'll have Dr. Beal come. Lord, I want to thank
you for this time. Hope and pray that this has been a help to
us. I pray that you would help us
to truly examine our own lives and examine the manner in which
we say things to be certain that we are truly above reproach. I thank you for the passages
that we've been able to study. And Lord, I ask that you would
challenge us here in these closing moments in Jesus' name. Amen.
The Balances of Sound Speech
Series Spring Semester 2022
| Sermon ID | 23222157446203 |
| Duration | 41:08 |
| Date | |
| Category | Chapel Service |
| Bible Text | Colossians 4:6 |
| Language | English |
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