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The following message was delivered
on Sunday morning, February 24th, 2008, in the Adult Sunday School
class at Trinity Baptist Church in Montville, New Jersey. Now I want to begin by saying
that during my 45, this July will be 46 years among you as
one of your pastors, it has been my joy to pastor a people who,
both in their individual lives and in their corporate life,
have both validated and illustrated the gospel that is preached from
this pulpit, that was preached from pulpits set up in several
different schools, from the pulpit that is now in the multipurpose
room that used to be in what we affectionately called the
cracker box. Now let me explain what I mean
by the statement that you have individually and corporately
both illustrated and validated the gospel that has been preached. Over the years, visitors would
come among us, and after they had been among us, would speak
to one of us in leadership and say, Pastor Martin or Pastor
so-and-so, I was tremendously impressed as I came to worship
among you. to see how your people came in,
quietly prepared their hearts, entered in wholeheartedly to
the worship. You were validating what was
preached from the pulpit, that the gospel creates earnest, passionate,
serious worshipers. They would also comment on the
behavior of your children. One woman, a very well-known
leader in evangelical circles, worshipped with us here one Lord's
Day a number of years ago and was so impressed with the way
the children behaved themselves. And she inquired of one of our
people, how is it done? And she was told, well, we believe
it can be done. We start early and we stick with
it. You were validating what was
preached. from this pulpit that the gospel
creates men and women committed to godly family life and to parental
guidance and government of the children. Pastors have come for
our pastors' conference and stayed in your homes, and some of them
have said they never saw gospel-ordered homes until they came into some
of your homes. They didn't see regular family
worship, and they went away challenged. Why? Because you, as a people,
have both validated and illustrated the gospel that is preached from
this pulpit. Another area that has marked
our life together, which has also both validated and illustrated
the power of the gospel in days gone by, has been the decided
modesty and the distinctive femininity of the dress and the demeanor
of the women in this church. the decided modesty and the distinctive
femininity. However, in the past year or
two, there has been a marked erosion among us in both of these
areas. We as pastors have seen it with
our own eyes. We have had men come to us vets
in their hearts and in their minds as they struggle to maintain
mental purity before God. Eyes that do not become the inlet
of lust on the basis of what they see. Furthermore, There
have been members of the church who have expressed their sense
of vexation and concern that we have lost ground in this area
of the decided modesty and the distinctive femininity of our
women. And as your pastors, we have
spent much time discussing, praying, wrestling with such questions
as, how should this be addressed? What forum should it be addressed
in? How explicit shall we be without
crossing the line of good taste and holy discretion? Well, a
couple of weeks ago we called you as a church to pray that
God would guide us, and I believe that my standing here this morning
is a direct answer to your prayers. that God gave us a sense of an
answer to our wrestlings, how to address it, what forum within
which to address it, how explicit to be. And I stand before you
with a good conscience this morning, convinced that it is God's time
to address it in this forum and to be as explicit as I purpose
to be in the unfolding of this matter. Now let me begin with
three introductory concerns that will kind of set the field, clear
the field of misconception as I then come to the heart of these
issues. The first introductory concern
is this. In all that I say this morning,
I'm addressing the members of this congregation and their families. Should God be pleased in the
next hour to bring among us 20 raw 21st century pagan women
dressed with mini skirts, cleavage almost down to their belly buttons,
or with slats of stretch material that hug their thighs and their
buttocks and their crotch We're not about to meet them out in
the foyer and say, you can't come in here and listen to our
gospel in that way, and then hand them a shawl and say, wrap
this around you before we welcome you into this place. We would
welcome them exactly as they show up among us unless they
showed up naked. We would welcome them to come
and sit under the ministry of the Word of God, to sit under
the gospel. However, As they sit among us,
and as they look around, and as they interact with the people
of God in this place, whom we are confident would be lovingly
aggressive to interact with them, to introduce yourself, to show
a genuine interest in them as image-bearers of God, sinners,
yes, but image-bearers of God with the dignity and nobility
of an image-bearer. that it wouldn't take long for
them to draw this conclusion. If I begin to believe what's
preached in this place, if I begin to internalize this gospel that
is preached from that pulpit, I will begin to dress like the
women in this place who are marked by decided modesty and by distinctive
femininity. In other words, we take them
as they are with a view to seeing them become what God says the
gospel will make them. So I want to make that very clear,
lest anyone go out and say, oh, well, the elders already want
sinners to come in. No, no, my friends, don't go
there. Please, don't go there, because that's not where we are. The second introductory concern
is this. In addressing the members and
their families, please listen carefully, I am not saying that
we as elders believe that the women members of this church
are deliberately seeking to be seductive or sexually provocative
to the men who sit among us, or that the women who are members
of this church are willfully, deliberately, and defiantly seeking
to blur male and female distinctions in your dress. Now, I've kept
my eyes on my notes because I worked out the wording of that statement
very carefully and purposefully. We, as your elders, do not believe
that there are women members of Trinity Baptist Church deliberately
seeking to be seductive or sexually provocative to the men among
us, or that you are willfully and deliberately and defiantly
seeking to blur male and female distinctions in your dress. However,
without in any way taking back one word of that statement, We
do believe that society has so degenerated in these two areas
of decided modesty and distinctive femininity and is presently squeezing
some of you into its mold contrary to the will of God revealed in
Romans 12 and verse 2. be not conformed to this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. We believe that
the world's pressure is being evidenced in this place in the
dress of some of you. Therefore, I come to you this
morning with a burdened heart and with a bent knee seeking
under God to sensitize your consciences in this area of gospel fruit. You will notice how from my opening
statements I will continually use the terminology validating
and illustrating the power of the gospel. And that's the issue
that's at stake. It's the gospel that is at stake. Yes, the men among us need to
take seriously Matthew 5, 28, which says, Whoso looks to lust
upon a woman, whoso looks with a view to lust after her, has
committed adultery already in his heart. Any man that willfully
goes from what he sees to what he would desire to have will
answer to God for his sin. That's clear from the Scriptures.
However, my dear sisters in Christ, there are two other passages
that need to be brought into the orbit of your deepest concern
as a woman. The first one is Luke 17, 1 and
2. And Jesus said to his disciples,
it is impossible but that occasions of stumbling should come. In
other words, the world being what it is, the human heart being
what it is, occasions of stumbling are going to come. But woe unto
him, woe unto her through whom they come. It were well for him,
for her, if a millstone were hanged about his neck and he
were thrown into the sea, rather than that he should cause one
of these little ones to stumble. The little ones are those who
believe in him. And my dear sisters, I beg of
you to listen to this passage. Any man that lusts after you
will answer to God for his mental adultery. But you will answer
to God if you've provoked it by the manner in which you are
dressed. The second text of Scripture
is Romans 14 and verse 13. Romans 14 and verse 13. Let us not therefore judge one
another any more, but judge this rather, that no man, no woman,
put a stumbling block in his brother's way, or an occasion
of falling. That's what we are to judge.
Am I in any way, in the manner of my dress, putting an occasion
of stumbling before one of my brothers in Christ. Here, ladies, get hold of this
principle. Purity of motive does not cancel
the effects of your appearance. Purity of motive. You may have
a heart as pure as the untouched new-fallen snow on a hillside
out there this morning. no desire whatsoever to provoke
a man to lust, to seduce a man, but the purity of your motive
does not cancel the effect of your appearance. You may have
a heart as pure as the new-fallen snow, but a bared thigh with
a long slit up to here will provoke the lustful thoughts of a man. And God says to you, members
of Trinity Church, I said, you are the ones whom I am addressing
primarily. God says, judge this rather,
that no woman, no man put a stumbling block in his brother's way or
an occasion of falling. Mrs. Al Mohler, wife of a man
to whom God has given literally national prominence with his
syndicated radio broadcasts and his blogs, she said this, and
I want you to listen to her, don't blame the men around you
who happen to be unfortunate enough to be within sight and
say, they need to get their minds out of the gutter. Proverbs 30
and verse 20 says, This is the way of an adulterous woman. She
eats and wipes her mouth and says, I've done no wrong. Ladies must remember what battles
men face to stay pure as they are stimulated visually by women. They should never have it flaunted
in their faces and to have it done at church is an abomination. That's a woman speaking to her
sisters in Christ. Then the third introductory concern
is this. I am speaking for your pastors,
including Pastor Chansky, this material has been run by Pastor
Chansky and he with Pastor Smith and Pastor Carlson share this
burden. I'm speaking as your pastors,
as those responsible for this local assembly and concerned
only with this local assembly. You may go to other churches
and you may find expressions of dress that are contrary to
the things that I am going to articulate this morning. And
my response to that is the words of Jesus in John 21. What is
that to you? Follow thou me. We leave to other pastors to
answer to God what they do in the sphere of their responsibility
We are concerned with what we do in this sphere of our responsibility. And if you find that some of
the things you hear this morning are not going down smoothly,
we plead with you. Don't seek out others who share
your reservations and form a little grousing club. Come to us with
an open Bible. and show us where we've gone
beyond the scriptures. And we will stand in this pulpit
and make alterations or retractions, whichever are necessary. Well, those are my three areas
of introductory concern. Now I come, first of all, time
permitting, to an appeal for decided modesty of dress. If you were to look up the word
decided, you would find that it's defined as definite and
unmistakable and clear-cut. In other words, I'm making a
pastoral appeal not for pressing the edge of the envelope. but
for dress in the house of God on the Lord's day that is marked
by decided modesty." In other words, no rational man or woman
would be able to say anything other than, that woman is dressed
modestly. Open your Bibles with me, please,
as we look, first of all, at the biblical basis for our concern. 1 Timothy, and we start in chapter
3, verses 14 and 15. We're going to come to 1 Timothy
chapter 2 and verse 9 and 10, but we start with 3, 14 and 15,
because here Paul tells Timothy why he wrote and what he wrote
and when he wrote it. These things I write unto you,
hoping to come unto you shortly. Paul is desirous that he might
very quickly be able to return to Ephesus. But if I tarry long,
here are the burdens on my heart. These are the things that I would
address were I with you now, if I come shortly. But if I don't,
Timothy, be my alter ego, address them for me. But if I tarry long,
that you may know how men ought to behave themselves in the house
of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and
ground of the truth. Timothy, I'm writing specific
directives concerning behavior in God's house, God's church,
which He has constituted both the foundation and the support
of the truth. In other words, the church is
pillar and support of the truth. She is to confess the truth of
God. She is to embody and be shaped
by the truth of God. Both elements are absolutely
crucial that the church must confess the pure gospel of the
grace of God and the church must validate and illustrate that
gospel in its life and in its conduct. And only then is the
church the pillar and the ground of the truth Now, what are the
things, then, that pertain to behavior in God's house? Well, after chapter 1, where
he says in verse 3 that he left Timothy behind to sort out some
doctrinal aberrations, he starts his list of church concerns in
chapter 2 and verse 1. I exhort, therefore, first of
all, Here's my first concern, and that first concern is that
the church be marked by this world-encompassing, gospel-framed
light of prayer. That's Paul's great burden in
verses 1 to 7. And then in verse 8, he is concerned
that the male members of the church Take the lead in that
prayer concern and prayer perspective. I desire, therefore, that the
men pray in every place, lifting up holy hands without wrath and
disputing. Then he goes on to address women. We're going to pause for a moment.
and Passover verses 9 through 15 and then in chapter 3 he takes
up the biblical standard for elders and for deacons and says
these are the character traits that must mark those who are
to be set apart in those offices and nestled down in the midst
of this behavior which Paul says ought to be the mark of the people
of God. Go back to verse 15. If I tarry
long that you may know how men ought. And that little particle
of necessity, the Greek word de, there is an element of oughtness. And Timothy, you are responsible
to make sure that these standards are implemented in the church
at Ephesus, that the church at Ephesus be marked by world-encompassing,
gospel-shaped prayer, that elders and deacons be marked by these
requirements. And also, Timothy, now we come
to verse 9, in like manner, that is, I desire the pressure of
that verb, boulamai, I desire in like manner that women adorn
themselves in modest apparel. Let me read four translations
of that verse. The NIV. I also want the women
to dress modestly, with decency and propriety. ESV. Likewise also that women should
adorn themselves with modesty and self-control. New King James
Version. In like manner also that the
women adorn themselves in modest apparel with propriety and moderation. New American Standard Bible. I want women to adorn themselves
with proper clothing modestly and discreetly. Now, I want to
read a very simple summary of what the words in the original
mean and what they point to, and here I quote John Stott in
his excellent commentary on 1 Timothy. First, he tells women to dress
modestly. with decency and propriety. It is not possible to distinguish
these words from one another in a clear-cut way. That's why
you have these various translations. But the general impression is
clear that women are to be discreet and modest in their dress and
not to wear any garment which is suggestive or seductive. This establishes a
universal principle. Then in the following verse,
where he gets very specific about hairdos, etc., what Paul is emphasizing
there is that they should not be neither seductive, nor in
any way suggestive, nor should they be ostentatious. dress in
a way that immediately when they walk by, every head turns and
you look at the hair piled up on their head in a certain way,
or their garments adorned in such a way that they are ostentatious,
showing, so that when you come to the house of God occupied
with God, this woman walks by and you become occupied with
her. And after commenting on those verses, then Mr. Stott
summarizes by saying, what Paul is emphasizing is that Christian
women should adorn themselves with clothing, hairstyles, and
jewelry which in their culture are inexpensive, not extravagant,
modest, not vain, and chaste, not suggestive. So, for us as
your pastors, to be upfront and graciously confrontational and
proactive concerning the matter of modesty does not put us off
the charts of our duty. What would you think of us if
we gave up the centrality of world-encompassing prayer shaped
by the gospel in our life together as a church? gave it up in our
prayer meetings, gave it up in our worship services here. What
would you think of us when the text says, I will first of all,
that prayer, supplication, intercession, giving of thanks be made for
all men? What would you think of us if
we no longer insisted on the biblical standard for elders
from chapter three? What would you think of us If
we gave up what Paul says about the teaching, ruling ministry
in the church, and that women are not to teach the mixed assembly,
women are not to govern, and we began to entertain the thought
of women elders, I ask you, in Christ's name, what would you
think of us if we permitted this? It's going on in many churches.
What would you think of us? Well, in the same way, Nestled
in these same directives is the apostolic mandate that women
must dress modestly in the house of God. And we are not going
to avoid the insistence that that will be true in this house
of God. Do we carry a conscience? I hope
we do. So that's the biblical basis
for our appeal. We have no alternative. Now then, secondly, I want to
identify the ten things that most frequently tempt men to
think unclean thoughts. This is not an exhaustive list.
But I've run it by my fellow elders, I've run it by some others,
and I believe I am accurate in saying these are ten triggers
to lustful thoughts. Let me use this image. These
are like magnets in a woman's dress. Magnets that draw men's
eyes to parts of their bodies that if they are to maintain
purity of mind, they don't want their minds drawn to these parts
of a woman's body. Here are the ten magnets to men's
eyes. Number one. Dresses or skirts
with lengthy slits. When a man's eye sees a slit
that comes up to the knee or above, he thinks, oh, a few more
inches and what would I see? That's the way a man's mind works. If your fathers have not told
you this, daughters, it's true. If you husbands have not told
your wives this, shame on you, you know it's true. This is a
magnet to men's eyes, dresses or skirts with lengthy slits. Secondly, dresses or skirts which
hug the buttocks. I don't know a better word to
use. I ask my brethren, what do I mean? My shirt is not hugging
any part of my body except perhaps this is hugging my wrist. A skirt
that hugs the buttocks is a skirt that not only comes down over
the buttocks, but back into the back of the thighs. When you
see pictures of hookers, one of the marks of a hooker, she
always has her buttocks hugged. Whether it's a mini skirt, whether
it's jeans, whether it's tight slacks, her butt is always hugged
because that's what she's selling. And that's what she wants men
to buy. It's a magnet to men's eyes. Thirdly, any upper garment that
hugs the breast. And I don't know a better way
to describe it. It's one thing for your garment
to come down over and hang loosely upon the breast, but to hug the
breast, to shape and isolate your breasts. becomes a magnet
to men's eyes. People should not receive an
anatomy lesson in mammary glands when they look at you women.
It is a magnet to men's eyes. Fourthly, unbuttoned blouses,
low necklines, or cleavage on any upper body garment. You know what I mean by the buttons?
You've got a blouse that buttons up to here. You not only unbutton
here and here and here, but you unbutton right down to one button
away from bearing your bra. And when a man sees only one
button to go, his mind goes, I wonder what's under that one
more button. I'm looking down right now at
a young woman. who has everything up to the
last button. It opens the collar. That's all. And a man's mind only sees. That's
an open collar. Come two buttons down and what
he sees and what he thinks is an occasion of stumbling to him. John Piper ministering to thousands
out in Minneapolis. He is burdened about this issue,
and he's posted an article on the Internet. Is modesty an issue
in the church today? Listen to Mr. Piper. Necklines
are an issue these days. Everywhere I turn, at the airport,
at the church, The necklines are plunging. Some fashion designers
in the world are communicating to women today that the thing
to do is to have your neckline split, extend too low. Unbuttoned blouses, low necklines
on the shirts that may be under your jacket, cleavage of any
kind on any upper body garment. And also, women, remember, In
the church setting, you are found at times bending over, picking
up a child. Bend over and look at yourself
in the mirror before you leave the home. What may seem to cover
you well standing, bending over does not cover you sufficiently
to be dressed modestly. Number five, another magnet to
men's eyes, sleeveless blouses or dresses with large armholes. You look down on your sleeveless
dress and you see nothing but your shoulder. But if it's a
large armhole, a man sitting behind you looks up at the pulpit,
sees through to your bra, and his mind goes where he doesn't
want it to go. It's immodest. to appear in the
house of God with sleeveless blouses and dresses, with large
armholes. If the armholes are tight enough
that no one can see in, then that's your liberty before God. Number six, low-rise skirts or
pants. This is the style made popular
by Christine Aguilera, Britney Spears, Jennifer Lopez, these
sexpots, sexpots, flaunting their bodies in their gyrations with
their so-called music. They've made this style popular
with the skirts that barely hang on the hip bones. And with the
jeans that barely come up and cover the crack of the buttocks,
I've been in situations with Christian women where I've had
to look at the crack of their buttocks because of the low-rise
jeans, skirts, or pants. Number seven, see-through clothing
of any kind. Clothing that does not cover
your undergarments to the point where no one can see them. Some of you need to know the
function of a camisole. Number eight, skirts and dresses
that are just plain too short. Difficult when you're seated
to adequately cover yourself and then you get engrossed in
something in a public setting and you're not keeping your knees
locked together. And before long, the legs are
spread a bit and anyone just happening to glance can see clean
up to your panties. That's not modest. It's immodest. It becomes a magnet to men's
eyes. Listen to Mrs. Moeller again.
She says, if you arrive at church dressed in such a way that by
the end of the service the people around you, by no fault of their
own, know the color of your underwear and they've watched you do a
shimmy dance as you try to get your too short, too tight skirt
to go under you, there's a big problem. I like her humor. You have to do a shimmy dance.
But seriously, women, that does not meet the biblical standard.
I will that the women dress modestly. Number nine, slacks or pants
or jeans, hear me carefully women, that hug the buttocks, the thighs,
and the crotch. And crotch is not a coarse word. The dictionary defines it as
the place where the legs fork from the human body the seam
or place where the legs of a pair of pants meet. And here I speak
from a deeply burdened heart. This is one of the areas, dear
women, where the immodesty has taken over in Trinity Baptist
Church. Some of you showing up with slacks
that I've never asked you what the material was. but they either
have spandex in them or they are a kind of material that is
a stretch material and hugs the buttocks, comes around and hugs
the thigh and presses up on your crotch and the crack of your
buttocks and you have no idea what that does to many a man
when he sees it. You draw the eye to the most
erotic part of your body. That whole area becomes a magnet
for men's eyes. And the apostle says, I will
let the women dress modestly. And then number 10, a bared midriff
and back. This whole present style where
tops come down and just barely, if at all, meet the low-rise
jeans. You may look in the mirror and
say, well, I'm fully covered. But all you need to do is to
reach here and a couple of inches of your belly are showing. All
you need to do is bend over and people can see your back and
usually the top of your underwear and it's happened right in this
assembly. I have seen it Wednesday nights
in the prayer meeting to my embarrassment. Thank God, not to my lust, but
to my disgust that this would be tolerated in Trinity Baptist
Church. One man said to one of his elders,
I saw a woman bend over, could see the top of her panties, and
I wondered what it would be like to put my hand down her back. A godly young passionate to be
a holy young man, and caused to stumble in this place. Now, am I saying that I'm negating
what I said earlier? No. I am loathe to believe that
the women involved in the two incidents I've just cited are
deliberately seeking to cause men to stumble. But, my dear
sisters, the purity of your motive does not cancel the effect of
your dress. And I'm going to do something
right now to stick my neck out. I'm going to ask the men seated
here this morning, and the boys, if you find any one or more of
these things that I've called magnets for your eyes, an occasion
of struggling with purity of mind, I want you to raise your
hand. Keep them up, men. Keep them
up, please. High. Now, my sisters, look around. Come on, 360 degrees. Keep them up, men. Women, turn
around. Girls, I'm not looking at you.
I won't embarrass you. Get a good look at how many,
put your hands down now, men, of your dear brothers are struggling
With these issues, I'm not a dirty-minded old man trying to rob you of
your Christian liberty. I'm a pastor determined that
in this place, women shall appear modestly to the glory of God
and to the good of their precious brothers. So then, having laid
out the biblical basis of our concern, secondly, having identified
the ten magnets to men's eyes, what are you to do as a woman? Well, here is my counsel. Let
me work down through my notes. Number one, repent. Repent. of the ways in which
you have unwittingly and carelessly allowed yourself to be sucked
in by the world's standards and have caused occasion of stumbling
to your brothers. Ask God's forgiveness. Go to
the Lord Jesus Christ. And say, Lord Jesus, wash me
in your precious blood. I had no idea that those tight
slacks that are so comfortable caused my brothers to sin. Oh,
Lord Jesus, forgive me. I trust that many of you will
have dealings with God today in the way of repentance. Lord
Jesus, I had no idea that that shirt that hugged my breasts
and shaped them and formed them was an occasion of stumbling.
Lord Jesus, forgive me. Cleanse me. Wash me in your precious
blood. Repent. Go to Christ in faith. Find the purging of His own precious
blood. If we confess our sins, He is
faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us
from all unrighteousness. And then bring forth, therefore,
fruits, meat for repentance. Go to your dresser drawers. Go
to your closet. and remove anything and everything
that has one of these ten magnets embedded in it. You say, Pastor,
I'll show up in the same outfit for the next five weeks. Hallelujah! If it's modest, we'll rejoice. And if anybody comes up and says,
hey, don't you have another unit? You come and tell us and we'll
get on there. We'll find some reason to get in their face.
I'm serious, dear women. Have dealings with God in the
way of repentance. Secondly, pray for and labor
to cultivate a sensitive and well-instructed conscience before
God on this issue. Pray for and labor to cultivate
a sensitive and well-instructed conscience before God concerning
this issue. I'd be willing if I asked for
a show of hands. I am ninety-nine and forty-four
one hundred percent certain that there are not a few of you women. As I've gone down these ten things,
I never realized, I never realized, I never realized. But now you've
got an instruction. To him that knows to do good
and does it not, to him it is sin. You can't claim ignorance
after this morning. And I'm looking out now, and
I find one or two women's faces hidden from mine, and I don't
like that. I like to see your eyeballs, so if you've got a
head in front of you, I'm looking over here so nobody will know
who I'm talking about. If you just move a little bit,
I want to see your eyeballs, women. I want to know, am I striking
home to your conscience this morning? You pray. And ask God to help you to cultivate
a sensitive, well-instructed conscience before Him concerning
this issue. Pray in the Luke 17 passage. Pray in the Romans 14.13 passage. Listen to the words of John Piper. I plead with the Christian women
of the world that they take into consideration the things they
are saying by what they are wearing. Dress to please the Lord. And you can still dress beautifully.
You don't have to look stupid or out of style to be modest.
I know this is the case because there are hundreds of very attractive
women at our church who dress modestly and don't cause men
to stumble and they don't look out of style. That's my plea
to you. Repent. and bring forth fruits
meet for repentance, pray for and labor to cultivate a sensitive,
well-instructed conscience before God concerning this issue. Thirdly, welcome the quality
control of husband, father, mother, the people of God and your pastors. Welcome the quality control upon
your modesty that should come from your husband, from your
father, from your mother, from the people of God, and from your
pastors. You may judge something to be
modest because you look at yourself through your own eyes. Someone
else is looking at you through a different set of eyes. Now,
if there are some men who will only believe you're modest if
you show up like a Muslim woman, we'll take those men aside and
deal with them. We're not advocating you all
go out and get a black gunny sack, cut a hole in it, and stick
it on your head. Not at all. But we need the quality
control. You men, you know what are the
magnets to your eyes. Monitor what your wife wears. It hurts me at times when my
wife comes up into my study and says, well, Al, what do you think
about this? I don't know, dear. It looks nice on you, but it
looks too nice on you. You be the quality control over
your wife. She's not a man. She doesn't
think like a man. You can't expect her to think
like a man, but you are a man, aren't you? Well, begin to act
like one. Acquit yourself like a man and
say it sweetly. Say, dear, the slit goes up too
high. Oh, but hon, dear, the slit goes
up too high. Oh, but hon, the slit's too high.
In other words, you start out nice and sweet. If she resists
you, you meet her head on and say, you will not leave this
house with that skirt as long as I'm your husband. End of discussion. Now, let me ask you men, have
you got that kind of holy testosterone? If not, go to God and ask Him
to give you a good shot of it. Be sweet, be gentle, be kind,
sensitive, but if she meets you with whining and starts to wear
you down, stand your ground. Quality control of husband, father
for the daughters, and mother. You have every right while your
children are under your roof, not only do you have the right,
you have the responsibility that they dress modestly. It's your
responsibility. Now I want you to listen to another
one of your sisters in Christ. This is Mrs. Mohler. I love this woman. I never met
her, but I hope to meet her sometime. She's got moxie. Mothers of sons
have often asked me, what can we do? We don't have daughters
we can influence, but we have sons that are looking at how
your daughters dress. Men of all ages struggle with
this. It's our job as mothers of daughters
to make sure our daughters' appearance are not causing males to stumble
or causing females to point to them as examples in order to
make their case. Richard Baxter, the great Puritan
preacher, said to women, quote, and you must not lay a stumbling
block in the way of men nor blow up the fire of their lust. nor
make your ornament snares, but you must walk among sinful persons
as you would do with a candle among straw or gunpowder, or
else you may see the flame which you would not foresee when it
is too late to quench it." And what do you do with respect
to your daughter that pushes you and pushes you with regard
to a certain standard? Well, she has, again, some very
helpful counsel. Time is going, so we'll have
to skip it. But basically, what she says
is, you're the mother. You're the father. You stand
the ground and you tell your daughter, in this house, this
is off base, this is off base, this is off base. No discussion. End of the issue. But then we
need the quality control of one another. Some of you don't have
husband, don't have father. But the scripture says in Hebrews
3.13, exhort one another while it is called today, lest any
of you be hardened through the what? Deceitfulness of sin. Sin is deceitful. You can think,
oh, I'm dressed perfectly modestly. But sin has deceived you. You
are not dressed modestly. You need the quality control
of God's people to draw aside lovingly and say, my dear sister,
I know the last thing in the world you'd want to do is cause
any man to think unclean thoughts. Isn't that true? Why, of course.
Well, I think maybe you ought to reconsider this or that that
you're wearing in the light of graciously exhort one another. And then, if there is any pattern
of immodesty, notice what I said, a pattern of immodesty that does
not yield to husband, to mother, to father, to the people of God,
then your elders are going to deal with it. And we're going
to confront you and say, our Bibles say that behavior in the
house of God mandates modesty of dress among the women. You
have a pattern of immodesty. It must stop. That's our responsibility. The text that has been haunting
me for months as we've wrestled with this, and my wife will tell
you and my fellow elders, I have been vexed. I think it's contributed
to some of this headiness over the past months. Been vexed. Lord, I see what's happening.
I know something must be done, but how? In what forum? In what way? Lord, give wisdom. And the text that keeps thundering
in my ear, the prophet Isaiah spoke of the false prophets and
he said these words, they are dumb dogs. that cannot bark. Dumb dogs! A watchdog that when
the thief comes, he sits there and licks his hand and he doesn't
bark. And I said, oh God, don't let
us be charged with being dumb dogs that cannot bark. That cannot bark and stand against
the tremendous pressure that the world is bringing upon you,
dear women. to get you to compromise or to
be insensitive to the biblical standard with respect to the
matter of your modesty. Well, I've just dealt with modesty. I haven't given my appeal for
distinctive femininity of dress. That'll have to wait. It's already
1031. And I don't want to squeeze the
other materials so that it's not dealt with adequately. So
we'll have to leave that for another forum. And trust that
God will guide us. And perhaps as my thinking on
the matter ripens and matures, I'll do a better job than I would
have had I covered the material this morning. So what have we
done? I gave you three disclaimers. We are not saying that if God
brings raw sinners among us, dress-like sinners, we're going
to reject them until they change their clothing. That's never
been our posture. It will not be as long as Christ
rules in this church. I have said I don't believe that
the women in membership in this church, I'm not speaking for
some of you who are not members, I believe there are some of you
young women who are seeking to be cutesy seductive. In other
words, if one of the men of this church propositioned you, you
wouldn't like that, but you like being cutesy seductive. You know
what the tight skirt does to the eyes of men and you like
it. But I don't believe that's true of any of the members. I
trust I'm not being overly optimistic, but I'm sincerely, pastorally
saying we do not believe that is true. And thirdly, by way
of that introductory concern that we laid before you, I can't
remember what it was and I don't have my notes in front of me,
so I'll have to leave it. But then I gave you the biblical
basis for our concern, 1 Timothy. I gave you the ten magnets for
men's eyes. You saw the many, many hands
of your brothers. I'm not barking up a tree with
no coons up in the tree. And then I sought to lay before
you what you ought to do in the light of what you've heard this
morning. Repent. Pray for a sensitized
conscience. and then plead with God to be
sensitive to the quality control of husband, father, mother, the
people of God, and your pastors. God grant that it will not be
long before anyone coming back into Trinity Church or coming
for the first time will see the gospel validated in the decided
modesty of the women of this church. The gospel is at stake,
my dear sisters. Let's preserve it in its substance,
in its doctrinal purity, and in its powerful application to
take women out of a society where immodesty is the order of the
day. and make them attractive, tasteful,
modest Christian women to the glory and to the praise of our
God. Let's pray. Father, we're so thankful we
have your Word as a lamp to our feet and a light to our pathway. And we pray that that Word will
powerfully work among us In the issues that we've addressed this
morning, hear our cry and answer us for Jesus' sake. Amen.
Validating the Gospel in Modesty
With a burdened heart, a bent knee, and an open Bible, Pastor Martin gives this earnest appeal to women for decided modesty of dress.
The men, however, are not excluded in this message. Husbands and fathers are called upon to provide pro-active quality control for their wives and daughters.
This earnest appeal includes:
1.) Ten magnets for men’s eyes.
2.) Specific directives for women.
| Sermon ID | 2250872194 |
| Duration | 59:03 |
| Date | |
| Category | Sunday School |
| Bible Text | 1 Timothy 3:9; Romans 14:13 |
| Language | English |
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