And for us, O Lord, as we now come to Your Word, we ask once again that You would give us our daily bread, that You would use Your Word to sanctify us, that You would use Your Word to drive out remaining sin within us, that You would use Your Word to equip us for every good work of righteousness for the glory of Christ. Lord, use your word to accomplish your purposes and to do your work in us. We pray that Christ would be glorified in this time. It's in his name we pray. Amen. Well, if you have your Bibles with you, please turn to 2 Samuel chapter 13, and we'll be continuing our study in that chapter today. Let me tell you, the first half of this chapter was a doozy. I get it. That was one of the hardest passages I've ever had to preach. You know, it was a very dark passage, and I have to warn you once again that the passage that we come to today is extremely, extremely dark, although it doesn't touch on subjects of such a sensitive nature as the ones that we touched on last week. Instead, this week we're going to be touching on something that every one of us, I think, is faced with, a temptation that every one of us is going to be faced with eventually, and that is the temptation to hold on to grudges. Because the reality is, if you have interaction with human beings at all, eventually you're going to be sinned against. And there's going to be a temptation to hold on to that sin and to get angry about that sin in an unrighteous manner. And so today's passage is going to be focusing on that. We're going to be looking at verses 23 to 39 in 2 Samuel chapter 13. As fallen human beings, it's just one of our tendencies to hold on to grudges. when we're sinned against, or even, maybe you weren't the one who was sinned against, maybe it was somebody you love. You'd be tempted to hold a grudge then too. Trust me, if you have a kid who gets, you know, picked on at school, it's real easy to, all of a sudden, develop the mindset of like a ninth grader, and think, oh man, I'm just gonna, I want to go after those kids, and I need to go talk to his parents, and, you know, hold a grudge. We all struggle with this. We all have this inclination to hold grudges. There's a well-documented story of two German brothers named Adolf and Rudolf Dassler who started this profitable business which they called Dassler Brothers Shoe Factory together. And the brothers are said to have not exactly been exactly fond of each other exactly, but the success that their business had helped them to kind of put their differences aside, at least for a time. But it's reported that one night, again, this is in Germany during World War II, but there was one night during World War II as Germany was getting bombed by allied forces, the brother Rudolf secured his family in a bomb shelter, and sometime later Adolf brought his family in as well. And as Adolf entered, he muttered under his breath something that basically amounts to saying, ugh, they're here again. And he was referring to the Allied forces that were bombing the region, but Rudolf thought that the comment was directed toward him and his family, and thus began a grudge that nobody could convince this brother Rudolf to let go of. So the brothers ended up dissolving their business and each going their separate ways, never to be reconciled to one another. Each brother started their own new company. Adolf, who often went by the nickname Adi, started a company that we know today as Adidas, Adolf Dossler Adidas. and Rudolph started the company known as Puma. And I guess to this very day, these companies still have like soccer games to commemorate the grudge that they have against one another. But the animosity has apparently died down in the years since the brothers died. And it seems like such a silly story, doesn't it? It didn't have to start. All they had to do was communicate a little bit, and it seems like it could have been resolved. And yet, maybe you know what it's like to hold a grudge. Maybe you know what it's like for someone to hold a grudge against you. It can be a very irrational thing. In either case, you hopefully realize how irrational we can be when it comes to holding on to offenses, whether those are against us or whether they are against somebody that we love. Now as we come to the next passage in our study of 1 and 2 Samuel, we're going to see not only how irrational it is to hold a grudge, but we're also going to see that holding a grudge doesn't actually solve anything, at least not in a way that glorifies God, not in a positive way. After David's season of backsliding that we saw in chapter 11, part of God's judgment against David was to take the life of the son that Bathsheba conceived in their adulterous affair. But part of God's judgment would also last for the rest of David's lifetime. As God told David through the prophet Nathan, Behold, I will raise up evil against you from your own household. And so in our previous lesson, we saw that start to play out in real time in David's life as his oldest son, Amnon, lusted after and then sexually assaulted his half-sister, Tamar. It was a terrible story that left us disappointed and dissatisfied with the outcome. In the end, David got very angry upon hearing about it, but he did nothing to rebuke or to discipline Amnon. And we're told that Absalom, the brother of Tamar and the half-brother of Amnon, did not speak to Amnon either good or bad, for Absalom hated Amnon because he violated his sister Tamar. So it left a lot of things unresolved and unfinished. Absalom hated his brother. And he would hold this grudge that would remain unresolved, at least for a short time it would remain unresolved. But we were supposed to have seen that nobody, nobody who should have dealt with Amnon or who could have dealt with Amnon, nobody actually did deal with Amnon or his sin against his half-sister, at least not in a healthy way. In the end, Absalom has this simmering hatred for Amnon that would just fester. And David is exposed as being an absolute failure as a father. And it's with these unresolved issues, these things that are left untied, and unsatisfied feelings that we have, that we come to the passage that we'll be looking at today. And so the point of this passage is that unresolved resentment and rage in response to sin, either against us or someone we love, can all too easily create deeper issues, bigger issues. But God offers a better way to deal with rage and with resentment, and that is through repentance, reconciliation, and trust in His justice. Now like I said the previous passage was a dark one and while we might be tempted to view the vengeance of Absalom as being just, as being fair, we have to remember that God does not need vigilantes or self-appointed curators of justice who are bent on revenge and yet who are accountable and answer to nobody. In Deuteronomy 32, verse 35, this is the instruction that God gives his people. He says to them, vengeance is mine. Something that God has actually quoted twice in the New Testament as having said. And the reason that he says this is revealed in the next verse, Deuteronomy 32, verse 36, which says, for the Lord will vindicate his people. And thus we should see Absalom's refusal to leave justice in God's hands and to trust God to vindicate Tamar as a major, major character flaw in Absalom, which leads to actions that are just as reprehensible as the actions of Amnon, which led to this grudge holding. But verse 23 establishes the context for what will follow. Let's look at verse 23. It says, now it came about after two full years that Absalom had sheep shearers in Baal Hazor, which is near Ephraim, and Absalom invited all the king's sons. So we see that Absalom allowed this grudge to just sink into the depths of his heart, to simmer and to fester for two whole years. Now in the shorter context, we'll see that he allowed this rage to build up against Amnon, but given that Absalom will one day lead this uprising against his own father, King David, within Israel, I think that we can safely say that in the longer, the larger context, he's also allowing a grudge against his father to start simmering on the proverbial back burner. Now, on one hand, we cannot exactly blame Absalom for being upset at both Amnon and David, can we? I mean, wouldn't you be upset with both of them? I know I certainly would be. He has a right to be angry. In fact, I think it's probably good that he's angry. That's a healthy response to injustice. It's not necessarily sinful to be angry. And I know that a lot of people, a lot of Christians will say that we should never be angry, that anger is sinful, but we can't say that all anger is necessarily sinful. Number one, because we need to consider the fact that God has anger. God has anger. And if God has anger, then it can't be sinful. In Exodus 22, God instructs the Israelites, saying, You shall not afflict any widow or orphan. And He goes on to explain, saying to them, If you afflict him at all, and if he does cry out to Me, I will surely hear his cry, and My anger will be kindled. In Judges chapter 2 verses 11 and 12 we read, Then the sons of Israel did evil in the sight of the Lord, and served the Baals. And they forsook the Lord, the God of their fathers, who had brought them out of the land of Egypt, and followed other gods from among the gods of the peoples who were around them, and bowed themselves down to them. Thus they provoked the Lord to anger. So what we need to understand is that anger isn't necessarily sinful. It can be sinful but it isn't necessarily sinful. In fact there's something that we might refer to as righteous anger. which is actually commanded in the scriptures. You know the scriptures actually command us to be angry sometimes? In Ephesians chapter 4 verse 26, Paul says, be angry and yet do not sin. So there are two separate imperatives there, two commands given there. First he tells us to have this righteous anger, but then he immediately warns us about that righteous anger being corrupted by sin. Puritan John Downham wrote an excellent book titled The Cure for Unjust Anger, in which he correctly notes that, quote, anger is just and righteous when it is occasioned by a just cause, is expressed in a godly manner, is fixed on the proper object, endures for the appropriate time, and is directed toward holy ends. Let me read that again. Anger is just and righteous when it is occasioned by a just cause, is expressed in a godly manner, is fixed on the proper object, endures for the appropriate amount of time, and is directed toward holy ends." The problem is a grudge often begins with just and righteous anger against a just cause, something like sin, sin against us, sin against somebody we love, but it isn't then expressed. The anger isn't expressed or dealt with in a godly manner. Which is to say that righteous anger is easily corrupted by sin, which turns righteous anger into unrighteous anger. turns righteous anger into carnal rage, which is absolutely sinful. So Downham notes that, quote, we should not be so carried away with the violence of anger that in the meantime we forget love, end quote. And this is where Absalom goes terribly wrong. Absalom's anger initially was, of course it was justified. because it was against a just cause. It was against a heinous, heinous sin that was committed against his half-sister. But as we were outraged to read of Amnon's sin, everyone who knew about it should have felt the same way. They should have felt anger about it as well. But David's response to his feelings of anger, his response was just to do nothing. Just to dismiss it, basically. And that's unacceptable. And the reason that it's unacceptable is because he had a role in Israel that required that he deal with sin. But because of his failure to address this injustice is what resulted in sin's corruption spreading to Absalom. It started with Amnon, but now it spreads to Absalom as well. But Absalom's response to this heinous sin against Tamar is equally heinous. He allows his righteous anger to become an unrighteous anger, and he holds on to this unrighteous anger, to this grudge. for two years, which would have been enough time for Amnon to feel safe being in his brother's presence. And it would have been long enough for David to think that Absalom had dealt with this, that it was resolved, that bygones are bygones, and Absalom now has no intentions of seeking vengeance on behalf of Tamar. But know this, friends. Grudges, resentment, rage, these are not passive things. These are things that require that you make a choice to hold on to them. They require an active choice to nurture them. They require the active choice to feed them, to regurgitate them over and over and over, to ruminate on them, rather than to deal with them in a godly way. And this is exactly why Paul follows up those two commands. Be angry and yet do not sin. With a third instruction, do not let the sun go down on your anger. Again, that's from Ephesians 4, verse 26. The reality is, friends, if you know the nature of sin and if you know your own nature, you can't hold on to anger for two years without it being corrupted by sin. You just can't. You can't even hold on to it for one day without your anger being corrupted by sin, which is exactly why Paul says, deal with it before the sun goes down. Deal with it today. Deal with it immediately. Don't let it become an unrighteous anger. Unresolved resentment and rage in response to sin, whether that's sin against us or sin against someone we love, can all too easily create bigger and deeper issues. It must be dealt with in a healthy, God-glorifying way. tempered by love for our neighbor, tempered by humility before God. And this has to happen before our righteous anger is corrupted by sin and becomes an unrighteous anger. But as we're going to see, nothing is resolved for Absalom. He was just waiting for an opportunity. So let's continue, verses 24 to 29. It says, Absalom came to the king and said, Behold, now your servant has sheep shears. Please let the king and his servants go with your servant. But the king said to Absalom, No, my son, we should not all go, for we will be burdensome to you. Although he urged him, he would not go, but blessed him. Then Absalom said, If not, please let my brother Amnon go with us. And the king said to him, Why should he go with you? But when Absalom urged him, he let Amnon and all the king's sons go with him. Absalom commanded his servants, saying, See now, when Amnon's heart is merry with wine, and when I say to you, Strike Amnon, then put him to death. Do not fear. Have not I myself commanded you? Be courageous and valiant." The servants of Absalom did to Amnon just as Absalom had commanded. Then all the king's sons arose and each mounted his mule and fled. Well, Absalom turns out to be quite the actor, doesn't he? He comes before his father, King David, under the pretense of offering generous hospitality. He's going to throw a feast, and he just wants them to join him for it. And not only that, but he does so in a way that is intended to deceivingly, falsely show respect to his father, when the truth is that Absalom does not respect his father. He doesn't respect anybody except himself. And so Absalom extends an invitation to his father and to his servants to join him for this annual feast that would be thrown after the shearing of the sheep that he owned. And I imagine that Absalom expected his father, he anticipated that his father would decline this invitation because as soon as David declines the invitation, arguing that, you know, it'll be burdensome to you. In other words, it will be too many for you to accommodate. And as soon as he says that, Absalom just gives up. He gives up trying to convince David to attend and asks if instead his brother Amnon could attend. Apparently aware of the history between these two, apparently aware of a tension between Amnon and Absalom, David pauses and he asks, why should he go with you? Now David's doing right here. He should inquire, but he doesn't inquire deeply enough. But notice at this time, Absalom doesn't give up quite so easily. He continues urging his father, and instead of giving up like he did when David declined on behalf of himself and his servants, Absalom urged his father until his father gave in, and David decided to allow Amnon and all the brothers to go after all. But notice that just as David had sent Tamar into Amnon's bedroom earlier in the chapter, David now sends Amnon to attend Absalom's supposed feast. And I say supposed because Absalom's only intention is not to throw this big celebratory feast. His intention is just to get his brother Amnon drunk on wine At which point the plan was to instruct his servants to murder his half-brother. And this is where this story once again turns very dark. Absalom tries to instill courage in the hearts of his servants. And he does that by saying this to them. He says, do not fear. Have not I myself commanded you? Be courageous and be valiant. The inspirational words that he's speaking there to his servants are words that are normally reserved in Scripture for urging faithful saints to persevere and to do bold and holy things for the glory of God. But compare Absalom's words to the final words spoken to the Israelites by Moses regarding the wicked Amorites. He said to them, Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the Lord your God is the one who goes with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. That's from Deuteronomy 31, verse 6. Does Absalom not sound kind of like that? He's using a lot of the same words, a lot of the same phrases. Or consider the words of Joshua to the Israelites as they were preparing to enter into the promised land. In Joshua 1, verse 6, he says to them, Be strong and courageous, for you shall give this people possession of the land which I swore to their fathers to give them. Or consider David's words from Psalm 31 verse 24, where he writes, Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who hope in the Lord. I mean, there are so many examples of this kind of language being used, and it's always for the point of encouraging saints to glorify God and to do what's difficult. But what Absalom is encouraging his servants to do does not glorify God. It's the very antithesis of that. Absalom's using this covenant language of faithfulness to encourage his servants to sin, and to sin greatly, which reveals just the hardness of Absalom's heart toward God. It's one thing, you know, if Absalom decided to do this himself, to kill his brother himself, that would have been bad enough. That would have been sinful. It would have been terrible. But he could have done this himself. But to instruct his servants to do it for him is to put them in an impossible situation. Do they do what God forbids? and live? Or do they defy their master? Do they defy Absalom and risk suffering his wrath? Maybe even risk dying themselves? Obviously the answer is that it would be better, it would have been better if they would have chosen to defy Absalom and obey God and just let the chips fall where they may. But the men nevertheless defy God instead and obey Absalom. And Amnon is murdered in the presence of his brothers as soon as he's drunk enough for them to get away with doing it. And all these people who were gathered, all the brothers who were gathered, and I assume the guards that were with them, they all, upon seeing Amnon murdered, they all gather up their things and they get out of there as fast as they can. They flee, not knowing if they themselves are going to be next. Psalm 133 starts out by saying, Behold how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity. Do we agree with that? Of course we do. That's what we experience every Sunday morning when we're here. It is absolutely such a blessed thing. But that's what makes this scene so horrific. The unity in David's household, it's not just shaken here. It is downright fractured. It's shattered. Calamity and distrust and treason even have entered David's royal family and true peace and unity would not be recovered in his household during the remainder of David's lifetime. Epsilom's sin brings us back to what God had instructed the Israelites regarding man's propensity to seek vengeance when he says, vengeance is mine. I will vindicate my people. to heed to God here, to yield to God's instructions here in this matter, really meant to truly and fully trust in God's promises. To trust that God would do what God says he's going to do. And that's what we see is that Absalom doesn't trust God at all to do what God has said that he would do. Instead of trusting in God's promise to render perfect justice, which only God is capable of doing, Absalom takes matters into his own hands as a statement of complete distrust toward God's promises. The fact that God is able to perfectly administer justice, whereas we're not, should be evident. We have feelings, we have emotions, we have just things that we don't know about that warp our perspective and prevent us from carrying out true justice. And we've especially seen in the last 10 years how true this is in our own justice system. We see district attorneys allowing criminals to get back on the streets in virtually no time, regardless of these criminals having a long history of violent crimes. Many times criminals actually end up serving no time at all for their crimes. The prosecutor offers them a plea bargain to clear up his own schedule for prosecuting other cases. This past week, I saw a terrible video of a terrible miscarriage of justice. In 2011, a fan of the San Francisco Giants attended a baseball game in Los Angeles against the Dodgers. If you know baseball, and if you know rivalries in baseball, you know that the Giants and the Dodgers have a huge and fierce rivalry against one another. And it's a long standing rivalry. But after the game, a couple of Dodger fans brutally, brutally beat this Giants fan. They fractured his skull to the point that you could see his brain from outside. They put him in a coma for nine months. They rendered him mentally disabled for the rest of his life. When they finally caught the Dodgers fans who did this, one of them got four years in prison, the other got eight years in prison, but today they walk free, and they are perfectly healthy, whereas this Giants fan, he'll never be healthy again. He's kind of trapped within this body and this mind that can't do what it used to be able to do. He lost his ability to live a normal life. Four years as punishment? eight years for really taking somebody's life, for really trying to murder somebody. I think we all realize how corrupt and just inept our so-called justice system really is. But here's the comfort that we have as Christians, friend. We know that God's justice is never corrupt, and we know that God's hand is not inept to administer justice. Vengeance is mine. I will repay, says the Lord. And given what we know, and given that we believe this about God, a second principle pertaining to justice and vengeance immediately and necessarily follows, and that is that you and I are never to take justice into our own hands. I'm certain that Absalom would have excused his actions by pointing to the sin of Amnon and the lack of response from his father. But by acting as a vigilante, Absalom not only took matters into his own hands that weren't his to take, but he also failed to trust God's promises. Paul instructs us this, Romans chapter 12 verse 19, Never take revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God. Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God. And the way that this argument is structured, the implication is that by taking revenge against somebody, taking matters of justice into our own hands, we don't leave room for God's wrath. That's kind of the implication there. Richard Phillips notes that, quote, humans are forbidden to act in vengeance, not because God refuses to do so, but rather because God promises to avenge evil, end quote. So what are we to do in the face of an injustice like this, where David refused to do anything to discipline or to punish Amnon? How are we to respond when we're sinned against or when somebody we love deeply is sinned against? Paul says this, continuing in Romans chapter 12, he says, But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink. For in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. What he's saying is that if you take vengeance into your own hands, you are being overcome by evil. You are being overcome by evil. That's why he says, do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. Have you ever, when you've been sinned against, have you ever considered God's ability to absolutely crush someone with the conviction of sin? My prayer for those who have sinned against me the worst in my life has always been that God would save them and that by doing so, God would allow them to feel the full weight of the sin that they committed against me. That the full weight of conviction would be so great that they would regret how they sinned against me and that they would be driven to be reconciled to me. It takes one to forgive. That's our responsibility. Forgive. And it takes two to reconcile. And my desire is to be reconciled to those who have sinned against me the worst. Our job as Christians is to forgive those who sin against us as our Father in heaven forgives us. And we are to do good unto them, trusting that God will deal with them. If not now, then later. We must not desire and we must not pray for anyone, including those who have sinned against us the worst, to suffer in hell for their sin. But we must trust that God will deal with them as He sees fit. And let that alone be good enough. Given all that the Bible teaches us about vengeance, about grudges, about seeking revenge, what Absalom should have done, we could come up with a handful of things, right? He should have prayed for his brother. Maybe he could have gone to his father and urged him to act and gone to David's counselors and urged them to urge David to act, to discipline or punish Amnon. Better yet, maybe he could have even gone to Amnon and pled with him to repent of his wickedness with an eagerness to forgive and be reconciled to Amnon if he should confess and repent of his sin. There are godly ways to deal with this that Absalom just completely bypasses. And of course if Amnon had refused to confess and to repent of his sin after all that, Absalom still should have trusted God's promise to execute and administer justice on his half-brother's behalf and on Tamar's behalf. The fact is that while revenge might give you a momentary sense of gratification, a momentary sense of satisfaction, it actually does nothing to calm the anger and the rage that burns within us. Revenge is like a cheap drug that does not give you true or lasting satisfaction. when you or someone whom you love is sinned against, before you act on the impulse to get revenge, to seek vengeance, search your heart and ask yourself this, do I believe God's promises or do I not? Because it's really as simple as that. And if you do trust in God's promises, you won't act on these impulses, these sinful impulses to get revenge. And you will stop the chain reaction of sin begetting sin, begetting sin, begetting sin. The sin in somebody else causing somebody else, you, to sin. Unresolved resentment and rage in response to sin against us can all too easily create bigger problems, create deeper problems, but God offers a better way for us to deal with rage and resentment, and that is through repentance, reconciliation, and trust in His justice. When you or when somebody you love is sinned against, Seek and trust in the Lord. Remember his promises. Lean not on your own understanding. Seek wise counsel. Seek godly counsel. And spend much time in prayer. Rather than pumping yourself up with rage, humble yourself before the Lord. So before the brothers who had fled are able to make it all the way back to Jerusalem, apparently news of what took place reaches David's ear back home in Jerusalem. Let's continue looking at verses 30 to 36. Now while they were on the way that the report, now it was while they were on the way that the report came to David saying, Absalom has struck down all the king's sons and not one of them is left. Then the king arose, tore his clothes, and lay on the ground, and all his servants were standing by with clothes torn. Jonadab, the son of Shimea, David's brother, responded, Do not let the Lord suppose they have put to death all the young man, the king's sons, for Amnon alone is dead. Because by the intent of Absalom this has been determined since the day that he violated his sister Tamar. Now therefore do not let my lord the king take the report to heart. Namely all the king's sons are dead for only Amnon is dead. Now Absalom had fled. And the young man who was the watchman raised his eyes and looked, and behold, many people were coming from the road behind him by the side of the mountain. Jonadab said to the king, behold, the king's sons have come according to your servant's word. So it happened. As soon as he had finished speaking, behold, the king's sons came and lifted their voices and wept. And also the king and all of his servants wept very bitterly. This is very interesting. There's not a lot of time for news to go from one person to another, to another, to another, to another, you know, telephone game, right? For the news to get to David. And we see that the news that reaches him is completely inaccurate. He's told that all of his sons have been murdered by Absalom. And this news, of course, naturally causes David to respond by grieving deeply. He tears his garments and his servants follow his lead. They grieve with him. We should remember that Solomon had a particularly special place in David's heart and that his nickname that we saw in the previous chapter, Jedidiah, indicated that Solomon was the person that David had in mind who would be his successor as Israel's king. So at this point David was thinking that Solomon was among the dead, was among those who were murdered. Maybe David was even thinking that maybe God had cancelled all the promises that he had made to David as a result of David's sin, a punishment of David's sin. But I suspect that the report, actually, because there hasn't been time for the telephone game to take place, right? Where, you know, the news goes from one person to another, to another, to another, and eventually, you know, some details start getting skewed along the way. There just hasn't been time for this. Because suddenly, Mr. Shrewd himself, Jonadab, steps in to correct this erroneous report. Is it at least possible that Jonadab had arranged for somebody to misinform David so that Jonadab could immediately step in and earn favor with David for giving him something that would comfort him, a more positive reporter, at least not as negative. I mean, it's certainly possible that Jonadab arranged this since there hasn't been time for this information to travel from one person to another through eight other people before it gets to David. This has to have come through one or maybe two people. We don't know. We don't know for sure. Whatever the case may be, we should be troubled to see that Jonadab is now one of David's trusted advisors. And as we come across him again, let us be reminded of the importance of having godly friends and godly counselors. and of the importance of avoiding close relationships, close friendships with those who are godless and motivated by selfish ambition the way that Jonadab is. David doesn't seem to suspect anything of Jonadab though. He's just comforted by the report that Jonadab gives him. Do not let my Lord suppose that they have put to death all the young men, the king's sons, for Amnon alone is dead. Because by the intent of Absalom, this has been determined since the day that he violated his sister Tamar. Don't miss what we see here in these words. We see that Jonadab was actually no friend of Amnon after all in the first place. Because he apparently knew that Absalom had every intention of doing this to Amnon. And he knew why he wanted to do this. And yet he allowed Amnon to go to this feast at Absalom's residence anyway. Why had he gotten so close to Amnon in the first place, do you suppose? I'd say it was probably for the sake of getting closer to David. It's just the fruit of selfish ambition. This is not a man who can be trusted. He's the one who guided Amnon into sin. He's the one who gave Amnon the whole blueprint for this idea of how he could assault his sister. But sure enough, as soon as Jonadab finished speaking, the sons of David were spotted out on the horizon by the watchman. And David has this cheerful reunion with his sons, with Absalom and Amnon being the obvious exceptions. But it's worth noting that this is actually the last time we see Jonadab, thankfully. And for three years, Absalom would go sight unseen as well. Verse 34 tells us that Absalom had fled the scene. Even though David had done nothing in response to Amnon's sin against Tamar, Absalom had no guarantee that he would get the same treatment that Amnon did, that he'd just be let off the hook. in the same way for his sin. He doesn't have any guarantee of that, so he flees. The final passage tells us where Absalom went and how David felt regarding Absalom having murdered his half-brother Amnon. So let's wrap it up by looking at verses 37 to 39. It says, Now Absalom fled and went to Talmai the son of Ammihud, The king of Geshur and David mourned for his son every day. So Absalom had fled and gone to Geshur and was there for three years. The heart of King David longed to go out to Absalom for he was comforted concerning Amnon since he was dead. So Absalom has fled to the region of Gesher. He was apparently friends with one of the princes of Gesher. And given that this was a godless pagan people, we shouldn't be surprised that someone like Absalom would seek refuge, seek and find refuge with somebody like that, with a pagan unbeliever. But this is ultimately where his quest for vengeance against Amnon would leave him for three years. But what's interesting is that we're told that David mourned for his son every day, but we aren't told which son David mourned for. You notice that? Did he mourn for Amnon or did he mourn for Absalom? It tells us actually in verse 39 that he was comforted about the death of Amnon, so it seems more likely that he was mourning for Absalom instead. We don't know for sure, but that seems like the most logical conclusion given what we're told. David felt as though he had actually lost not just one son, but two. And this is how he would feel for three years, being separated from Absalom. And of course, we know that Absalom ends up coming back, or if you didn't know, sorry, spoiler alert, now we know. But what we see is that David didn't desire to render justice to Absalom either. Instead, what we're told in the final verse here, verse 39, is that his heart went out to Absalom. Apparently he was feeling compassion toward Absalom. He was longing to be reconciled to Absalom. And when we see and when we start to think about and consider the way that David once again deals with sin in the lives of his children, and compare it to the way that God deals with sin in the lives of his children, we can only confess that God's way is far preferable. The author of Hebrews says this about God's discipline toward his children. He writes, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by him. For those whom the Lord loves, he disciplines, and he scourges every son whom he receives. It is for discipline that you endure. God deals with you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them. Shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of Spirits and live? For they disciplined us for a short time, as seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, so that we may share his holiness." That's from Hebrews chapter 12 verses 5 to 10. But what a question right in the middle of that, if you noticed it. What son is there whom his father does not discipline? We know somebody, David. We should see that discipline is an act of love. And we can only wonder then why it was that David refused to discipline his sons. We can only wonder and lament his utter neglect of his duty to administer justice as the king of Israel and to teach his children to walk in the ways of God. It's very interesting to consider how different 1st and 2nd Samuel are from the books that are really written as a parallel to them, 1st and 2nd Chronicles. The books of 1st and 2nd Samuel have a different purpose than the books of 1st and 2nd Chronicles. 1 and 2 Samuel have the purpose of recording the beginning of Israel's kings, how that got set into motion, and ultimately causing us to look forward to David's true and greater son, who would have an everlasting kingdom, and who would be a true and better king, the king of kings, the Lord of lords. Jesus Christ. But the books of 1 and 2 Chronicles are very different in their purpose. Their purpose was to instill a faithful confidence in a generation of Jews who returned to Jerusalem from Babylonian captivity. It was to instill a faithfulness to God, a confidence in God's promises. 1st and 2nd Chronicles, therefore, records things from a different perspective, since it was written for a different purpose. It doesn't record much of David's personal life, but it puts his public life, his life, his works as the king out on display for us to see. And that's why we don't read in 1st and 2nd Chronicles of David's sin with Bathsheba or his failures toward his sons. But putting 1st and 2nd Samuel side by side with 1st and 2nd Chronicles provides a very interesting compare and contrast, one that reveals David to have been a shining success in the public's eye, but to have been an utter and complete failure in his private life at home, particularly in the years that we're looking at now in our study. Friends, There's such a temptation for our lives to be the same. Don't let this be your story. Because this is the story of so many who work hard and who achieve success in the workplace, and yet it's done at a cost. And that is failing to raise their kids to know and to love the Lord. I'm not saying that it's bad to be successful, don't get me wrong. What I'm asking you to consider is if it is even worth it to publicly be seen as one person and yet be a totally different person when you are at home. I'm asking you to consider if it's worth it to be successful if it means neglecting your home life. As we consider the fractures that are driving David's family apart, we can only conclude that it is not worth it at all. And so if it has to be one or the other, ideally it's not one or the other, but if it has to be one or the other, it is far better that you fail in the public's eye but prosper spiritually in the home than it is that you would fail spiritually at home and yet prosper in the public's eye. Oh, how we need grace to prevent this from happening in our lives. We should hate such hypocrisy and we should recoil at the possibility of becoming hypocrites in such a sense. If only David had said, you know, forget my kingly duties for now. I have to go and be reconciled toward my wayward son Absalom. but instead he stays in Jerusalem while Absalom is off with the pagans and reconciliation never really takes place between them. How different are God's ways. While you and I were sinners, God went out and He sought us, in order that we may be reconciled to Him, and in order that justice may be administered in such a way that pardons us and yet still punishes the sin. Like Absalom, friends, you and I sinned, and we deserve death. And yet God, in His great love, didn't just long to be restored to us someday, He sought us. He confronted us with His law. But He pointed us to the cross, where we see His love for us on display. And He filled our hearts with faith. He took our sin, and He put it on David's greater son, the Lord Jesus Christ, so that he could be both the just, as a judge, and the Justifier as our Father who longs to be reconciled to us. Have you believed in Jesus, this true and greater King? Then know that it's because He sought you. and did what was necessary for you to be reconciled to Him. Have you not believed in the Lord Jesus? Then come out of your hiding and your running away from God. Call out to Him. Ask Him to save you. Ask Him to forgive you and to reconcile you to Himself. Ask him to help your unbelief in Jesus. Jesus promises this. He says it in John 11, verse 26. Everyone who lives and believes in me will never die. And he asks this question, do you believe this? This chapter has shown us how resentment, revenge, and division can just tear a family to shreds. But God's way, forgiveness, trust in His justice, pursuing reconciliation. It offers hope and healing for all of us. And it's found by grace alone, through faith alone, in Christ alone. Let's pray. Our most gracious and merciful God, how prone each of us is to seek revenge or to desire revenge when we are sinned against. Oh God, my prayer is that we would, when we are sinned against, my prayer is that we would see how much greater it is that we have sinned against you, how much heavier that debt is. And so I ask, Lord, that you would just search our hearts that you would heal our hurts, mend our families, help us trust you with the justice and the restoration that we long for. We thank you that you have shown us your great love for us in Christ Jesus, and that you have done everything that's necessary for us to be reconciled to you. Thank you for loving us, Thank You for disciplining us. Your Word says that whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but he who hates reproof is stupid. O Lord, apart from Your grace, we are so foolish. So teach us, Lord, to say with the psalmist, it was good that I was afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes. Grant us grace to know You. Grant us grace to seek You and to trust You and to be completely reconciled to You. Help us, Lord. Give us grace to confess our sins to You, knowing that Christ has offered the promise of forgiving us. Grant us grace to glorify you with our lives by trusting in your promises instead of seeking vengeance when we are sinned against. Fill us with your peace that the light of Christ may shine through our lives. In Christ's name we pray. Amen.