Before we begin to look at the resources that God's given you, and if you've been paying attention, if you've been awake, if you're a rational person, if you've been here these last sessions, you should be seriously under the pile. I know every time when I used to go to parenting conferences, I'd look at my wife and go, did we do anything right? What were we doing all those years? And we did a few things right by God's grace, but we always had more to learn, more to see, to figure out, some things to change, some things to start doing we needed to start, some things to stop doing that we needed to stop. And we're going to look at the resources that God gives us in order that we can do these things. Christianity is not a do-it-yourself religion. Your pastor and I realize that it's not your job to know this, but if you studied the history of American Christianity, you live in one of the weakest times in the whole history of American Christianity. Probably in 75, and that's conservative, 75% of the pulpits this morning, you will hear moralism. What's moralism? Do more. Try harder. Be a better person. That's what Christianity is all about. And I'm telling you, it's not. Christianity is not about you doing things better, harder, more. It's about what God has done in Christ and whether or not you will submit yourself to that and trust in Christ to be your Savior and to follow Him in faithful discipleship. It's not about you. Christianity is not about you. It's not about me. It's about God, the kind of person whom He is, and what He has done for us in His Son, Christ. And so I'm not going to give you a bunch of do, do, do, don't, don't, don't. I'm going to be talking about the resources that God has given us to follow Christ once we're Christians and that we don't have the resources in and of ourselves to pull it off. I haven't persevered as a Christian for 45 years. You go, you became a Christian at two? No. I was 20, I told you. So, number two, that's two little bits of humor that have died right out here. Anyway, sorry. But for 45 years, God's given me the grace to persevere and He's given me the grace to be a biblical husband and the grace to be a biblical father because He's a God who gives what we need, which we lack. We'll come back to that, but I wanted to begin by thanking you for your support of me. Some of you may not know, but your church does support us each month in our ministry to churches here in the state of Georgia. After retiring for 31 years of being a pastor and 10 years before that as a student worker, some of the pastors here in Georgia, your pastor being one of them, said, why don't you do full-time what you did on the side for those many years, and that's encourage us pastors here in Georgia. If you'd ask your pastor, do you receive too much encouragement? Are you too up most of the time? No. If you are ever discouraged by the state of your family and how your kids are doing, how would you like to have 50 kids? Because the pastor is called to be the father to his congregation. 1 Corinthians 4.15 Paul says, you know, you may have many gods, many helpers, but you have only one father. That was me through preaching the gospel to you. A faithful church planning pastor has all these children he has to watch over and give account for one day. And that's hard. And it's not that we don't love doing it, but it's hard. If you get tired of clashing with one of your children sometimes, imagine having several children who are always eager to clash with you, or take turns clashing, or who do sad things. So, pastors need encouragement. This is a very tough culture to be a pastor in. And we're not of the race of the Wimpedites, we're not intrinsically weak people. However, because it's so difficult, thank you, he got that, that we are in a very tough time. Your church has a bigger bullseye than most churches. Why? Because there's 3,000 people here? No. Because of all the wealthy people in Cook County go here? No. Because the more truth that you hold on to, the more truth that you're trying to save and to pass on to your children and to preach in this culture, the more of a threat you are to the evil one. Jesus says the strong man keeps his good in peace until someone stronger comes along and takes them away from him. And the strong man, to the degree that he's held Cook County in his sway, does not want people like you holding on to 2,000 years of biblical Christianity and trying to pass it on in your generation. So, whereas a lot of churches are doing everything they can to get rid of truth and to say, we hold the two things in our church. That's really a shame. But you're trying to hold on to a lot of truth and you're a greater threat. And so you have a bigger bullseye and so your pastor is going to come under greater difficulty. So we need to pray for our pastors. And I want to thank you for supporting me because I get to do this full time and spend time with my friends and be with the people of God and do everything I can to encourage you all that we all make it to heaven. So thank you for your support. A rational parent, I said, seeing their great responsibilities, cries out, Lord, who is sufficient for these things? Friday night, we looked at what it means to be a biblical man. You know, I said, biblical parenting starts with biblical parents. Let's look at what the man is supposed to be as husband and father. Then Saturday morning, what's a biblical woman to be as wife and mother? And then we began looking at some general things about parenting. And, you know, unless you weren't paying attention, or are seriously deluded, there's a whole lot of things that you've missed or are missing or whatever, and you're kind of under the pile. Do you feel the great weight of responsibility of your high calling? And in this way, do you feel a certain sense of inadequacy? Well, we all do. Now, Christ's Apostle Paul had the responsibility for all of his missionary churches and their members, for example, We read in 1 Thessalonians 2, the reason why I wanted you to have this chapter read to you was because Paul talks about two things that he did as an apostle, as a church planter. He says, I was like a nursing mother with her children. Are nursing mothers with babes in arms attentive? They sure are. Oh look, there's a new wrinkle. Dad's going, oh it looks like the same baby as yesterday. The moms notice every little wrinkle, every little change in their baby. Like a nursing mother with her children, then later he says, like a father exhorting his children, we can do better, come on, I'm behind you, I love you, and he's exhorting his children to do better. Well, Paul says, I was a father and I was a mother to the churches that I helped plant. And so, in a sense, Paul was the proud parent looking ahead to the glory. And that was the last couple of verses. Paul says, what turns my crank? What turns me on? What gets me excited? It's not money. Paul said a lot of times he didn't have anything. He says, it's not seeing my name in lights. They didn't have neon lights back then. But he was imagining in his mind's eye, the last couple of verses of the chapter, he says, it's like a photograph taken in heaven. And in the picture are all the people that he's ministered to over the years. All the people he's poured his life into. Who is my glory? Who is my joy? What is my crown of rejoicing? He goes, is it not even you, Thessalonians? Along with the Galatians and the Corinthians and the Philippians and all the other cities where he ministered. Is it not even you? For you are my glory and my joy. You can't take anything to heaven but people. You can't take anything to heaven with you but people. Can't take your house, can't take your car, can't take your clothes, can't take your china, can't take your portfolio, can't take whatever else it is in life that has been very... The only thing that you can take is people. And Paul said, I have in my mind's eye you who are my glory and joy and crown of rejoicing. And so really he was like a father and a mother feeling a responsibility for all these people. Now, you could say that Paul had a very large spiritual family to care for, and you'd be right. Hundreds of people. His spiritual family included many spiritual children. I mentioned the young churches at Galatia, the island of Crete, Ephesus, Colossae, Philippi, Thessalonica, a host more. His spiritual family included children that greatly grieved him. When he wrote to the church in Galatia, he was very stern and very upset, because they were about to lose the gospel. His spiritual family included children that were high-maintenance and difficult. Not every, but most families have at least one child that we spend an inordinate amount of time with this child because this is our high-maintenance child. I'm sure your church doesn't have any high-maintenance children, but other churches seem to, so I'll just throw that out. And that was the church at Corinth. In the writing to the Corinthians, he addresses 20 problems. How would you like to get a letter saying, number 16, you know, he's going through all the things that need to change. And finally, parenting people's souls is hard, taxing, soul-draining work. Paul says in 2 Corinthians 11 verses 23 through 30, he begins to list all the physical stuff he went through in his years. He said, I was beaten up more times than I can count. Now, if I've been beaten up, I can tell you every single time. I was beaten up three times for the gospel. He says, I can't remember if it was 11 or 12 times, I've been beaten up a whole bunch. I've been caned with a rod across my back. X number of times. Whipped, he said, I spent a night and a day clinging to a log in the Mediterranean after I was shipwrecked. He says, I was accosted by robbers, I was accosted by Jews, I was accosted by Gentiles. All of this incredibly demanding, scary. One time he was stoned to the place that they thought he was dead. The opponents dragged him out of town, dropped him in a gully. His disciples ran over to him to see. And sure enough, he was still alive. God preserved him. He went through a lot to pastor these churches. Then Paul goes, after he lists all these things, and as only a person who gives his life to others can appreciate, he goes, apart from such external things, I mean, that would have finished me right there. He says, apart from these external things, he says, I'll tell you what really gets me. Which of my people who don't fall into sin don't make me burn inside with indignation. I hate it to hear of people doing poorly spiritually. Which of my people who are struggling right now that I don't struggle? When I graduated from college, I was somewhat athletic. I was in pretty good shape. I was a runner. And you know what? I was not prepared for the difficulty of ministering to people. I used to feel like a vampire stuck its fangs in my neck and I'd come over and be totally drained because giving your life to people is soul draining. It is. Giving your life to your children is soul draining. Giving your life to your wife or to your husband and your family is soul draining. You have to pay the price. And Paul talks about how incredibly soul draining it was for him to give his life to these people in these churches. I say all that not to say let's have a pity party for the Apostle Paul or let's have a pity party for your pastor or me. I've had many pity parties, nobody ever comes. So let's not do that. But, I want you to see that Paul learned a lesson that parents need to learn. Paul learned, I can't do this on my own. It's too big. It's too hard. I can't do this on my own. I need divine, supernatural resources to pull this off. So that's point B. Paul had to increasingly face up to his felt sense of inadequacy. So in 2 Corinthians, which most Christians don't read much because, oh, this Paul guy is talking about his struggles and I'm not an apostle. Well, every time he talks about his struggles as an apostle, think about his struggles as a parent. There's lots of good things in there. Paul bares his soul to the problem child, Corinthians, and he cries out, who is sufficient for these things? Moms, dads, have you ever had a day when at the end of the day you go, I don't know if I can keep doing this. Who is sufficient for this? As Paul reasons with the Corinthians about where the resources for adequacy comes from to fulfill a seemingly impossible task, he tells them six verses later in 2 Corinthians 3.5, not that we're sufficient in ourselves to claim anything that's coming from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God. The God who calls you to get married is the God who gives you the resources to pull it off. The God who gives you children is the God who gives you the resources to be a parent. The God who calls you to be a husband gives you the resources to be a husband. The God who calls you to be a wife gives you the resources to be a wife if you will look to Him. So he told the Philippians while he was in prison, Paul wrote Ephesians, Philippians and Colossians while he was in prison. Here's a guy arrested for being a Christian preacher in prison telling people on the outside how to be happy and free. What an irony. So he told the Philippians while he was in prison, I can do all things and by that lawful things that God requires of me, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. I can't rob banks and look to God's strength. I can't be a child molester and look to God for grace. I can't be this or I can't be that. He's not saying I can do anything at all possible in the whole universe. He's saying anything that God calls me to be and to do, He's given me the resources to do it. I can do all things through Christ. He wasn't called to be married, but He had far more kids than I've ever had. And He had to give His life for all these churches and all the pastors in these churches and the peoples in these churches. There it is in a nutshell, just as it was beyond us to save ourselves and God's supernatural work was absolutely necessary. Do you believe that? Do you believe that it was only the grace of God in Christ? Do you really believe that on judgment day, you're going to say, I'm a sinner. I saw that. You opened my eyes. I'm so thankful you did. There's nothing I can do to save myself. But you sent your son for people like me. Guilty, wicked sinners who can't change themselves. and you put my sins on Christ, and you punished my sins on Christ, and you gave me His righteousness that I could stand before you as a mini-Christ for the rest of eternity, I have nothing else to plead, I'm resting on Christ. Nothing in my hands I bring, only to thy cross I cling." Do you really believe that? Because on Judgment Day, you're going to have to stand before God and say, OK, why should I not cast you into condemnation? I was a Baptist pastor, wrong answer. I was an American. There's all kinds of cockamamie foolish answers that we can throw out there. But the only answer that God will accept is, I have nothing to plea except the finished work of your son. Jesus Christ came to give his life for wicked people like me, amazingly like me. Christ is the great physician, and guess who physicians treat? Sick people. And most people go, no, I've got my act together, I don't need this Christ stuff, I've got my own act together, thank you. Fine, die in your sins. But Christ said, if you know yourself to be sick unto death, I've come to people just like you. There's lots of cocky people, lots of people full of themselves, I don't need nothing. I got this, thank you, I got life by the tail. You won't think that on judgment day, but it'll be too late. But for those of you who've come to see, it's God's grace that He opens your eyes to see it. Otherwise, you know, what's the hymn we sing? Why was I made to hear thy voice and enter a wilder's room while thousands make a wretched choice and rather starve than come? It was the same love that spread the feast that sweetly drew us in, else we had to refuse to taste and perish in our sin. Believers need the powerful resources of Almighty God to live out the details of a holy life, whether it's marriage, family, work, or citizenship. I can't be a Christian at work. I can't be a Christian in America. I can't be a Christian in my marriage or in my family apart from the resources God's provided. Have you learned this lesson? Your adequacy or sufficiency to complete your God-appointed work as a believer comes from God through Christ by the Holy Spirit. If we were first century Jews and we had heard about Christ, Christ came as a Jew. He came to fulfill all the promises and fulfill all the symbols of the Old Testament. He was the sacrificial lamb who, when slain, would substitute for guilty sinners who put their trust in Him. Well, if we're first century Jews, one thing the early Christians said would have really been hard for us to swallow. You're saying that God doesn't dwell in the temple in Jerusalem anymore. That's right. That's what as a Christian preacher I would say. According to the Word of God, Jesus and Christ himself said, the Old Testament, the Old Covenant is coming to an end. A new thing is beginning. I am not going to dwell behind a curtain in the Holy of Holies in Jerusalem any longer. I'm going to dwell in new temples, smaller temples, human temples that have been cleansed by the work of Christ and God the Holy Spirit will take up residence in your heart. And first century Jews, you go, nah, I don't believe that. And it's blessedly true. And to emphasize my point, I've appointed this train to come by right now. And there's an exclamation mark right here. When a person becomes a Christian, it's because God the Holy Spirit comes upon them, not that they feel or recognize it, it's not like we're preaching here and suddenly some guy starts flopping around in a seat and falls on the floor and you go, whoa, I guess the Holy Spirit got a hold of him. Jesus says in John 3, it's invisible, you can't see it, it's like the wind. You can see the after effects when the person's converted, but not while God's working. But this supernatural work, God the Holy Spirit comes upon a person who's dead, blind, clueless, deaf. And He makes them to see. And He makes them to see who God is. And He makes them to see who their sins are. And He makes them to see what judgment is. And He makes them to see that if Christ isn't a Savior, they're done. And He gives them the ability to repent and believe. In 1969, as a college junior, I repented of my sins and believed on the Lord Jesus Christ. Jesus didn't believe for me. He didn't repent for me. That was really me repenting. That was really me believing. But He gave me the grace to do it. Otherwise, I would have been, just like everybody else, clueless, lost. He gives you the grace to become a Christian and then he gives you the grace to stay on being a Christian. God the Holy Spirit is put inside each believer. You kind of go, I'm not sure I believe that. Well then re-read your New Testament. You are now the dwelling place of God the Holy Spirit who is called the down payment, the earnest money. What's a down payment? What's an earnest money? Well, to show that I'm going to go through with the deal, I'm going to give you this is a down payment. So what's God giving to people that he's saving? I'm going to take you to eternity. Christ is returning. There is such a thing as an afterlife. There is such a thing as heaven and hell. I'm going to spare you in this life, save you in this life, take you into eternity. You go, how do I know that you're going to fulfill this deal? I'll tell you what, I'll give you some earnest money. Really what? The third member of the Holy Trinity, God the Holy Spirit is given to you to actually live inside you to see to it that you persevere and that you make it to heaven and that you're able to do the things that God calls you to do. Yes. There are some people who make a big deal about the Holy Spirit as if He only comes to make you speak gibberish and give fantastic prophecies. That's not the thrust of the New Testament. It's there and it's passing away, it's said. But the thrust of the New Testament is God takes up His residence inside each believer and enables them to persevere in this life and to make it to heaven. So what are God's strong resources? Well, I've just jumped into the first one really. These strong resources are what are called by some believers the means, the wherewithal of grace. How does God dispense what I need to make it? God the Son gave God the Spirit to you as his divine stand-in. What's a stand-in? Someone who takes the place of someone else. Christ told his disciples in John 16, I'm getting ready to leave. They go, oh no. Let's all clutch, guys. He's leaving, the Master, the Lord's leaving. What are we going to do? We've learned everything from Him. He showed us what God's all about. It's not good for us that He leaves. Jesus says, it's better for you that I go than if I stay. How could it be better? He says, if I don't go, the Holy Spirit will not be sent. But if I go, I will send Him to you. He's been with you, but He's going to be in you forever. Well, in Ephesians 5, 22 and 23, a verse we did not read, but if you trust me not to be lying, I'll tell you what it says. In these passages right here, Paul says, don't be drunk with wine or high on amphetamines or just all kinds of alternative fillings. He says, but be filled with the Spirit of God. Let the Spirit of God have full sway, full reign in your heart. And then he says, and this is what's going to happen. He says, when you're filled with the Holy Spirit, He doesn't mention prophecies or speaking in tongue or rolling around the floor doing wacky things. He says when you're filled with the Holy Spirit, you'll be speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs. You'll be having a spiritual overflow to other Christians. Singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord and giving thanks in all things. A thankful Christian is a mark of the Spirit of God helping them. A sourpuss negative Christian is a mark of someone who is not filled with the Spirit. Because when you are filled with the Spirit, you are singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, giving thanks in all things. For this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus. And submitting to one another out of Reverence for Christ, I will be who I'm called to be. I will be the biblical husband. I didn't have a lot of leadership in my home growing up, but I'm going to learn to be a biblical husband. I'm going to be a biblical wife. Submission is not my thing, but I'm going to learn it. And we're going to do this together. And so he talks about marriage. He talks about parenting. He talks about being a Christian on the job. Those are all the overflow of being filled with the Holy Spirit. We cannot do these things in the power of our own flesh, but need supernatural resources, and God provides them. How do Christians act Christianly? Because God the Holy Spirit is working in them these virtues that weren't there before. I can remember the first few months I was a Christian like it was yesterday, and it was so startling to me because I found myself suddenly doing things, not just that I didn't want to do before, I never even thought about before, and now I find myself wanting to do them. Going to church? You're kidding. And wanting to sing songs about God? You're kidding. And talking to my fraternity brothers about God? You're kidding. But I wanted to. It was in my heart. It was the new me. But what was happening? Was I trying to turn over a new leaf? That I have a picture of Jesus on this wall, and the Ten Commandments on this wall, and I'm going to start trying to do all these things I never did before? No, it was inside of me. Christianity is about an internal work of God that produces a relationship that overflows. And so I was wanting to do these things I never wanted to do before. So let me ask you, are you self-consciously relying upon God, the Holy Spirit, to do what you're called to do? Whether you're a Christian husband, wife, parent, child, regardless of what kind of work you have, student, farmer, physician, Real estate agent, whatever your background is, if you say, I can do this, I got this, then you haven't learned. What did Peter learn in Luke 5? He'd been out fishing all night when professional fishermen would fish. Jesus uses his boat to preach and then says, OK, why don't you let out and we'll catch some fish. Peter goes, Lord, you're the master. You're the great creature. I'm just a lowly fisherman, but this ain't fishing time. But since you're the master, I'll humor you and do what you say. And suddenly every fish in the lake jumps in Peter's net. So his boat's being swamped, pulling it in, so they have to bring another boat over that starts to be swamped too. And they go, whoa, how did this guy make every fish in the lake jump in our nets? And he falls down and he begs Christ, to leave him. I see who you are. I see who I am. I thought I knew everything. This is my career. I know fishing. I don't know squat compared to you. Forgive me. I'm a holy man. I'm a holy man. Depart from me. You can't do even your call profession if God doesn't give you the grace to do it and do it well. Do you self-consciously look to him moment by moment to enable you to obey God's word? In 2 Timothy 1.7, a verse I repeat to myself many times because I get in situations when I'm afraid, God has not given you a spirit of fear, but one of love and power and self-control. Sometimes a clear mind is translated. Just what you need to be a biblical parent. I need what? I need love. Little Reginald is really drying my vases today, but I'm going to love that little sucker if it kills me because he's really pushing me today. Okay? And I need power. You know, if you're a person who doesn't like to fight, and your kids will go, I do. Let's go. And you go, by the end of the day, you go, I just don't want to argue and wrestle and have battles of the will all day. So you need power to be faithful. Where does that come from? Not from you. And you need self-control. I could ring Reginald's little nut. Was it a rule in our house, before you applied the spoon, before you applied the board of education to the seat of knowledge, if you're really, really torqued, you might want to hit the counter first. So if I came home and there was a broken spoon on the counter, I'd go, whoa, this is a bad day. You know, we need all those things to be biblical parents. We need each of these things. the love, the power, and the self-control. But God gives it to us, and we need to remind us that we have that resource. God has not left you helpless and hopeless, bereft of the necessary ability to do the job. It's like God is a bad coach. He sends you into this game. Okay, we got the Super Bowl coming up. I think it's tonight, isn't it? But you're going to be here learning about parenting teenagers and older children, so anyway. But let's say theoretically some of these other people are watching the Super Bowl and the Seahawks and the Denver Broncos are playing. And suddenly, through a time travel, you find yourself standing on the sideline. It's really cold. It's New Jersey in January. And you've got a uniform on. And the coach sends you into the game. What am I doing here? I'm supposed to be back in South Georgia. We've got no seminar. Oh, God, help. And you find yourself with your little wobbly legs going out into the game. And the coach says, Praying for you, slap you on the rear end as coaches will do and send you out. That slap on the rear end is not going to help me coach, I'm going to get massacred. These guys are twice my size, three times my weight, ten times meaner than I am. I'm what you call dead meat. Is that what you think the God's called you to do? He's given you these impossible kids, a knucklehead of a spouse, and then I want you to love them and be happily married and happily parented ever after. Well, He's given you God the Holy Spirit. We'll see He's given you other resources. You can do what He's given you to do. Even if it's really hard. Even if it's the hardest thing you've ever done. God is able to give you what you need to do it. Luke 11, 9-13, another verse I come to a lot. Ask, and it shall be given to you. Seek, and you shall find. Knock, and the door shall be opened. Then he goes on to say, if you hard-hearted and sinful men know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask? Did you know that you can pray for more of the Holy Spirit? Say, Lord, would you give me more of the Holy Spirit's grace, more of His love, more of His strength, more of His patience? I'm beaten down today or I'm tired today or I can tell I'm irritable and impatient today and I don't want to go off on my family. Would you give me more of the Holy Spirit today? Would you be pleased to make me a better man or better woman than I am right now? Are you regularly seeking to have the Holy Spirit's empowerment to display the fruit of the Spirit? I can remember reading the fruit of the Spirit. It's not fruits of the Spirit. It's one big cluster and they all count. Love? Boy. Joy? I'm thankful for these kids. Yes, I love them. Okay, love, joy, peace. Okay, Lord, this doesn't have to be World War III. I can deal with this. Patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility or meekness, self-control. Whoa, that's a real help in parenting, isn't it? Lord, I thank you that you give those things to those of us who ask, and I'm praying for this. You can do that. Turn the page over. So, the first resource that God's given you is God the Holy Spirit. He's not left you in the game being torn apart by the Broncos and the Seahawks and your little weenie legs out there and your little weenie neck holding up this big helmet. That's what it would look like. Have you ever been around a professional football player and their necks are about this big? And it looks fine on the helmet, but if you see a little string neck coming out of theirs, not impressive. He's given you God the Holy Spirit to pull this off. Second point, God gave his inspired word for your wisdom to function. One of the big questions you have as a parent is what in the world are we supposed to do now? Amen? So if you go back to another passage in scripture, Colossians 3.16, I mentioned Ephesians 5.18, don't be drunk with wine or anything else but be filled with the Holy Spirit as the alternative. And these things flow out of it. In Colossians 3.16, if you read it, it says, let the word of Christ, this book here, let the word of Christ richly dwell within you. Read this book. Think about this book. Reference this book. Look up passages in the book that are geared to the situations you're dealing with. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you. And then they say, what flows out of that? Well, it's a mirror to Ephesians 5. In Ephesians 5, it's let the Holy Spirit Fill you, and these things will flow. In Colossians 3, it's let the Word of God dwell in you richly, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord, giving thanks in all things. Well, wait a minute. That just sounds like what he said over here, but instead of it being a result of being filled with the Spirit, it's the result of letting the Word of Christ richly dwell within you. Exactly. They're two sides of the same coin. They're the same thing in a sense. What does the Spirit of God want me to do? What the Bible teaches? Where does the power come from to flesh out the Bible? From the Holy Spirit. I need both the Holy Spirit and the wisdom and the eyes of God to know what to do. So then in Colossians 3 it talks about, okay, let's talk about marriage. Let's talk about parenting. Let's talk about employers and employees. First century version was slaves and masters. Okay? So the point is, these two things are equal to each other. You can't separate. Well, I'm a Holy Spirit person. How do you know what the Holy Spirit wants you to do? Well, I don't know. I just ask Him and then whatever pops into my mind. There are a lot of things that pop into your mind you might want to put to death. I'm going to beat this kid about an inch of his life. Well, the Holy Spirit didn't lead you to do that. If you don't have the Holy Spirit and the Word of God together in tandem, then you're unbalanced. So Paul says, let the Word of Christ richly dwell within you. And he's given you the Word. We need the eternal wisdom of God to live out in our lives the things that please the Savior. To rely upon your own wisdom is foolishness. I said the first message, I said, and I've mentioned earlier this morning, I said, if the Bible is biblical plumb, plumb is what you do to determine vertical. If the Bible is plumb, to what degree was the family that I grew up with out of plumb? And I realize, I know who I'm speaking to, there's all kinds of backgrounds here, I'm not trying to pick on any of you, but very few people today come from Disneyland anymore. The world of the 50s is gone. We're in the 21st century, marriage has been shot with a shotgun, and all kinds of people are staggering around with bad situations. Okay, and the Bible gives us clear guidelines what's plumb. Well, my home I grew up in was seriously out of plumb. Okay. Now you can only know that by knowing what Plum is, but here's the kicker. If you don't make a conscious effort to deal with this difference, you're going to repeat it, you're going to replicate it without even working at it, because this out of Plum-ness is normal to you. That's what you grew up with. My dad was always this way, my mom was always this way. Was it right? Well, no. But you're repeating it. I know, it's just what I grew up with. Well, you can change that. You know, I used to have this giant padlock on my door of my mini barn for years. It was a great lock. It was an expensive lock. It was a hardened steel lock that we lost the key. After 22 years, 26 years, we lost the key. My neighbor came over, I got some new bolt cutters, no problem. Whoa, solved that problem. You do not have to be shackled by the things that your parents did or did not do. You don't have to be shackled by the past and bad child-rearing. You don't have to be shackled by, well my dad just dropped the ball, my mom wasn't exactly an all-star either, and I have reasons why I'm the way I am. You don't have to stay the way you are. You don't have to be shackled with the past. The bolt cutters of God the Holy Spirit and the Word of God to inform you how to be different can change your life. Like I said, I didn't become a Christian until I was almost 21. My parents weren't Christians. They were somewhat religious, but they weren't Christians. But I was able, even I, a knucklehead by profession, was able to learn how to do things differently. If I can learn, you can learn. I know this will get thrown in my face later. You said you were a knucklehead by profession. prayerfully meditating upon God's word gives us the wisdom we need to parent our children. I can remember times when we're dealing with a problem with our child, one of our children, and then we just happen to be reading. We've been praying about it, just happen to be reading something in my personal devotions that day and, Lord, that's what we're supposed to be doing, thank you. Bathing our mind, both husband and wife, in the word of God, renews our minds and makes them more in tune with God's holy wisdom. John 17, 17. Jesus prays for Christians. He says, Lord, sanctify them in the truth, and your word is truth. We're not to be conformed to this world. We're to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. Okay, this is how I used to live in my BC days. This is how my parents lived. This is the world I grew up in. This is how I thought about the world. But I'm repenting from much of that. How I was taught to treat people, how I was taught to treat the opposite sex, how I was taught to treat my spouse, how we acted in a family, how we treated our children. Many of these things need to be repented of and changed. And God is gracious and He forgives sinners. Again, it's the only raw materials He has to work with on the whole planet are sinners. Let's see, who should I work with on this planet that's really got it together? There is nobody on this planet who has it together. The only people he has to work with are sinners. And he transforms them and makes them sons and daughters. What an amazing God. So, God gave you the Holy Spirit, you have supernatural, and I use the word not mumbo-jumbo like in a bad church service where people act weird and people are like, that's supernatural. I go, no, that's just weird. But, supernatural means above nature. Above what you could do naturally. Okay? He's given you supernatural power in the Holy Spirit. He's given you supernatural wisdom. The wisdom of God is greater than the wisdom of men. As the heavens are higher than the earth, Isaiah says, so is God's word higher than our... God's thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and God's word higher than our word. We can know things that God's revealed to us that would make us wiser than our teachers. For example, since human beings are cut off from God by their sin, they miss out on God's wisdom. When you're reconnected with God, and He says, guess what? You can catch up and you can find out the stuff that most people have blown off centuries ago, and you can build your life on something solid rather than the shifting sands of human wisdom. And you begin to build your life on the Word of God, and your life is stable and sturdy. Storms break against your family. Problems happen. This is a fallen world. Hard things happen. And you can stand, and your house stands, and you survive. And you go, how did we get through that? I didn't think it was worse than a hurricane, man. But we got through it, and we're still here. We're still walking with the Lord. See, God gave us unlimited access to Himself through prayer. I'm so glad that God is the kind of father I'm not. You know, on my very best days, I'm far, far, far from being a great father. My son is one of my two best friends in the whole world after my wife. But I wasn't a perfect father to him. I love him. I hope I would give my life for him. I love him to pieces, but I wasn't a perfect father to him. And we need the kind of grace that we realize that my Father will receive me and I can come to Him anytime of any day and say, Father in Heaven, I don't know what to do. I'm stumped. This has me up against the wall. I don't know what to do. I've run out of my own wisdom. I've run out of my own resources. What in the world should I do? Would you please help me? Would you show me in your Word? My wife and I, your wife and I, we've been praying about this. We can't figure out what to do. This situation has us stumped. God just slaps you in the back and says, I'm busy, I told you not to bother me when I'm busy. I'm counting the hairs on this bushy haired guy over here, the hairs on his head and I'm really distracted and leave me alone. That's ridiculous. He's the father who always has a smile on his face when his children come. He always has a smile on his face when his children come. He's receiving the worship of myriads of angels, thousands upon thousands, 10,000 times 10,000, which, if you're a math major, that's a lot. Okay. I was an English major, so I just rounded it off. Okay. God's receiving the worship of angels, but one of his children comes to him, you have his undivided attention. He's not turning up the volume on the angels so he doesn't have to listen to you. He's turning down the volume on the angels, so to speak, because he wants to pay attention to you. I sent my son to die for you. I purchased you at the expense of my son. I want to know what's on your heart. I want to know why you're coming to me. Actually, he already knows. He worked in my heart so I'd come to him rather than dither for two more weeks and then finally come to him. Most of the prayers in the Bible are either praise. God, you're so great and wonderful, which Pastor Curt let us in. Or petition. Almighty God, I need your help. Or the really short prayers. Help! James 1.5. If any of you lacks wisdom, Let him ask God who gives generously to all without reproach. Do you know what without reproach means? You again? You are really stupid. Don't you get it? You're the slowest person in the whole family. God never does that. Thank God. I would be there. Not you. El Supremo. Knucklehead. You've come again. God never reproaches us for coming to him for wisdom. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God who gives generously to all without reproach and it will be given to him. This is given in the context of not knowing what to do in regards to a trial or problem. That's specifically the context. I want you to ask me. I want you to come to me. I'm here for you 24-7. Raising children means years of wondering what to do in regards to the latest turn of events. Yesterday was a great day and then today happened. What in the world am I doing? No testimonies please, we'll wait for that later. Prayer is a sweet means of grace, always at our disposal, even in the middle of a conversation. You can be praying as you're talking to someone who's yelling at you. Which is how some conversations with some people sometimes go. And you can be praying. You can pray while you're preaching. Pastor Curtin, I know that. You can pray, Lord help me, Lord help me do this and this. You can be praying and talking to the Lord while you're preaching to people. But certainly you can be praying while you're in the midst of some situation. Prayer is a sweet means of grace. And don't you know it? Those of you who pray and you get over your pride and you get down on your knees and you say, Oh Lord. And you spend time with the Lord and you feel like a million bucks. And you know that He loves you and you know that He hears you and you go, Why don't I pray more? And then the devil kind of does an Obi-Wan Kenobi. Get stupid. Forget that you need to pray. And then you just kind of go off and spend a couple of weeks doing your own thing and your own strength. The Bible often reasons from the greater to the lesser so we can learn to think biblically about God. For example, Romans 8.32 says, I want you to follow my logic. He who did not spare his own son. What does that mean? You can have everything in heaven, you can have all these angels, you can have eternity, but you cannot have my son. He is my greatest possession, my greatest blessing. That's what it would be like to spare your son. It's like you can have everything else, but you can't have this. I'm sparing this. Paul says, the greatest thing that God had was his son. And he didn't spare that when it came to rescuing you from your sins. He who did not spare his own son, but gave him up for us all, all believers. Now he says, reason with me. If he gave you your son while you're on your way to hell and you want nothing to do with him, how will he also, not also, with you, freely give you all things? The logic is, if he gave his son for you when you were nothing, isn't he going to take good care of you now that you're his son bought children? Does this make, does this stand to reason? He's going to treat you royally while you're a wicked sinner, but now that you're His, eh, what do you want? Think! He says, that's not rational. That's not who God is. He gave you His best when you should have expected His worst. Now that you're His, expect the best from Him on an ongoing basis. Another verse to think about. Proverbs 21.1 The King's heart is a channel of water in the hand of the Lord. What does that mean? Farmers, these guys here, they had irrigation issues. At the end of an irrigation ditch, you have a board that would move from place to place, and you'd fill up this line, this channel, and then you'd move this lever, and you'd want to be irrigating another channel. This verse says, the king's heart is like that little switch at the end of the line, and God moves it however he wants to. Now it's the king's heart. Who's the most powerful person in a nation if you have a king? It's the king. The reasoning is, if God can do this to the king's heart, then he can do it to anybody's heart. The king's heart is a channel of water in the hands of the Lord. He turns it wherever he wills. And we're to reason that he can work in this person's heart who ain't the king. They're just a lowly whatever. God can work in anybody's heart. Lord God, you gave this child to us as a gift of your grace. We now ask for your help in raising this child in the fear and instruction of the Lord. Help us to be faithful and do it right. We need your wisdom daily. We need to display the fruit of the Spirit daily. Help us for Christ's sake and the testimony to our children. Amen. That'd be a pretty good thing to pray. And finally, and it's 12 o'clock, but Kurt said I could go to 2. No, you were leaving at 12.15, but anyway. The final means of grace, and so many people in our culture miss it, because they haven't really been faithful to being in their Bibles. God gave us the local church as the place to grow our families. Now, God gave you His Spirit, God gave you His Word, God gave you Himself, prayer, and now He says He's given you a family of believers, which are kind of all in this together, and you can learn from one another, and you can pray for one another, and uphold one another. The New Testament knows nothing of solitary Christianity. That's me and Jesus. I'm sitting out here under a palm tree reading my Bible, and me and Jesus have it together. That's how many people live their Christian lives, but this has nothing to do with the New Testament. Nobody in the New Testament was a Lone Ranger. The Apostle Paul was sent from Antioch to be a missionary, and he always traveled with people. Even Paul wasn't a Lone Ranger. Jesus was submissive to his Father. He wasn't being the Lone Ranger bit either. Every New Testament Christian was a member of a local church and under the ministry and authority of a local church. Biblical parents know how much they need the local church as the context for growth. They gather to worship God and grow in the grace and knowledge of Christ and His finished work. I have a sister who has made a profession of faith in Christ. I don't know if it's real. Time will tell. There's no place where you can put on a pair of spectacles. I am not going to see where you're real spiritual conditioning because I have my spiritual spectacles on. Oh, some of you don't have any clothes on. You're spiritually naked. There's no spiritual glasses that you can put on to see a person's heart. But I keep telling my sister, if you don't get yourself in church and be a part of some church somewhere, you will not make it. And regardless of what profession you've made, there's too many dangers out there. The Bible knows nothing of going it alone your whole Christian life and never being part of a church. Now regardless of what issues you say you have of being with people, being insecure, being fearful, not having the clothes to wear, people will look down on you, and all the things you're throwing out that you've thrown out against every other relationship in your life. If you don't ever become part of a local church, you'll never make it as a Christian and you will have proved not to have been a real Christian. God says this is part of what you need to make it. Wise Christians discipline themselves to be under the ministry of the word and the sacraments faithfully each Lord's Day. The sacraments would be the Lord's Supper and Baptism. Wise Christians know that they need the cavalry of the gathered church for help. Psalm 73. The guy was bitter, the guy was angry, the guy was torqued at God that things weren't going well and all these people who didn't give a rip about God were getting on handsomely and were getting wealthy and fat and happy and his life was miserable. And he says, I was about ready to run my mouth and trash God in front of my kids and that would have been bad. And then he says, I went to temple, which would be the equivalent of I went to church. Boing! And I just happened to speak on something I needed to hear. I forgot about their end. What is it going to profit a man if he's Bill Gates and goes to hell? What's it profit a woman if she's so-and-so and ends up going to hell? I thought about their latter end. It came to me that they may seem to be getting by now, but their end is destruction. And I came to my senses and I was like a stupid animal before you, but now I get it. Well, we need to be in church because this is where the Lord can wash our minds. My wife and I were praying about something. We're not sure what to do. And it's not even in Pastor Kurt's radar. He's just preaching faithfully through scripture. It's on God's radar. And he just mentioned something in passing. Yes, that's what we needed to hear today. Faithful attendance means that you get what God has for you that Lord's Day from his word. The Puritans understood that preaching on the Lord's Day was God's word for His people that day. It wasn't a new word in the sense of, God showed me that you're supposed to give me all your money, like some of these TV preachers. That's not that phony kind of word. But the sense that God has a message for His people as the pastor opens up the scripture and applies it to God's people. That's His word for you today. And you'll miss it if you're not faithfully taking advantage of the means of grace. God the Holy Spirit has not promised to live in the tapes and CDs we produce later. Well, I'll just get the tape or CD later. I heard that conference was pretty good. I'll get the tape or CD. There's no promise in the scripture that God says, OK, I'll put the Holy Spirit in that tape and CD so you won't miss anything. If you don't discipline yourself to be with the good stuff, He has no promise to come back afterwards and say, well, that's OK, I'll make up for your lax attitude by giving you the blessing anyway. Having the Lord's Supper explained and enacted each Lord's Day drives home the Gospel and our need for regular cleansing by the Word of Christ. You feel like you've been a terrible parent a particular week. You've really struggled. You've not done well. As one dad said, I just begged him 27 times last night and he still wouldn't stay in bed. So you're really frustrated, you come to church and you're reminded that God didn't save perfect people, or even kind of good people, He just saved sinners. And He cherishes them, and He cleanses them with His Son's righteousness, and you're reminded, I'm not the hangnail on the body of Christ, I'm God's beloved son or daughter, and I can do this again this next week, because Christ is with me. The preached word washes our minds with truth and disciplines our actions by its corrections. Each baptism reenacts the death, burial, and resurrection of the Christian with Christ. I was buried with Christ. I was raised with Christ. I'm a new man in Christ. And finally, with Paul, faithful parents can say, I am what I am by the grace of God, and His grace to me was not in vain. I'm 65. My wife is 63. My son just turned 39. Can you believe that? My firstborn is 39, and my daughter is going on 36. My baby's 36. Sin and I are what we are by the grace of God. And you are what you are by the grace of God. And He will see that we all make it. He doesn't leave any of His people behind. We'll all make it to glory. There's no... Even when you've been through a really hard time, you feel like I'm dead, dying here on the battlefield. He says, I don't leave anybody behind. We all are going to make it. Let's pray. Our Father in Heaven, I thank you that you've called us to do significant things. You've given no promises or commands in your word to build skyscrapers, to build a huge fan base, to put our name in lights around the world, but you've given us the privilege of living for you in a fallen world to be in lights and dark places. You've given us the privilege of investing in another woman or another man who is our spouse. That I can present them before you on Judgment Day and they were helped to make it partly by me ministering and pouring my life into them. That you gave us children who will live for eternity. Skyscrapers don't live for eternity. Stadiums don't live for eternity. Building deals don't live for eternity. Great amounts of money don't live for eternity. But people will live on for the rest of eternity. and you've given us the privilege of investing our lives in them. What should be our glory and joy or crown of rejoicing? Is it not even the people you've entrusted to us on that day? Lord, may it be so for Jesus' sake. Amen.