1 Peter chapter number three, verse number seven. Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers be not hindered. The context of verse number seven is a part of what Peter has been focusing on since chapter two and verse 18, which is suffering. God's people will experience suffering in this world, sometimes unjust and unfair treatment as long as we live in this world. Peter is giving godly counsel to the believers who find themselves after their salvation living in a very difficult relationship. Peter is led by the Spirit of God to give counsel and wisdom, as we have noted, for servants and slaves who live under the control of owners who are often unkind and unfair in that period of time. He gives counsel and wisdom for wives who find themselves married to an unbeliever And here he gives counsel to the husbands. Verse number seven, who are married to unbelieving wives, living with a mate who refuses to place themselves under the authority of God's word. This will cause the believing wife, the believing husband, much grief. Peter sees this condition as a form of suffering, and so it's within this broader general context. They may not be suffering physically, but there are other kinds of suffering, as we have noted. There's mental, there's emotional, even spiritual suffering, a part of our experience as believers in this world. And so Peter challenges all who are suffering, as we have noted, to look to the sufferings of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. He is our example of how to suffer. Christ suffered for us, and we should be willing to suffer for him and to follow his example of how to respond to those around us in the time of our suffering. All of that is within the context of verse number seven. This verse contains several phrases, as you could see as we read through it, that are valuable for all husbands, especially for those who are married to a wife who rejects the authority of God's word over her life. This condition brings sorrow at some level to a husband who desires to lead his home as a spiritual man and bring glory to God through his marriage. A Christian husband will feel disappointment, even frustration as he's hindered by his wife's unbelief. Peter has seen this, he has witnessed it. Enough that it deserves attention under the inspiration of the Spirit in the Word of God for us. This is not new information to the world. This is not something that only happened then. It is something that continues to happen in our day. What does a believing husband do? We study what a believing wife does in verses one through six, who's married to an unbelieving husband, but what does a believing husband do when he's married to an unbelieving wife? That's the primary context of what we have here. In this brief sentence that Peter gives us, he offers some good counsel. And it's no matter the degree of the wife's rebellion or rejection of God's word in her life, this counsel remains the same. It's for all men who are married to wives who reject the authority of God's word over their life. In fact, as we work through it, the principles that we recognize and identify can and should be used by every husband. These are not just for husbands living with an unbelieving wife. These are principles that all husbands should consider this morning. Even if you're married to a godly wife, these principles remain the same for you. And so there's a continuation of thought when we open verse seven, Peter gives us this connecting word, likewise. as he did in verse one of chapter three, likewise, following the information about suffering that preceded this first likewise in verse one from chapter two. Wives, likewise, remember, are to follow the example of Christ when dealing with unjust suffering. A marriage divided over the instruction and authority of God's word will cause stress and division. And so in verse seven, likewise, in a like manner, in a similar way, there are husbands married to unbelieving wives. So that's the context that we have here. No Christian wife nor husband is perfect. If you're both believers this morning, that's a wonderful joy and benefit of your relationship But even if both of you are saved, you're not perfect as either a wife or a husband. But as Christian couples, generally, both are committed to learning and improving their role in the marriage, if you're Christian couple. Both of you accept the authority of God's word over your life. There's a shared commitment. to becoming more obedient to God's will for your life. That's one of the joys of being married to a believer. Peter begins his counsel here to believing husbands in verse number seven. Likewise, ye husbands in a similar manner dwell with them Dwell with them who, like the previous condition, had an unbelieving husband. You are to dwell with them who are unbelieving wives. This is an imperative. Dwell with them. This is what every husband who is married to an unbelieving wife ought to do. Dwell with them. Make every effort to do what is necessary to save your marriage, dwell with them. This is what believing husbands do. Married men, in Peter's text here for us, as well as Paul's, refers to the man in the marriage as the husband. And this word connects married men to the work of a husbandman. A married man is engaging in husbandry. This is his calling. Every husband is responsible for the cultivating and the developing of his wife, especially spiritually. That's what a husband does. That's his name. He's engaged in that activity of cultivating. The unbelieving wife will reject his efforts. to be a spiritual influence, but Peter is giving godly counsel how you can influence a husband who's married to an unbelieving wife, how you can influence your wife without the word, just like the wife who is saved can influence her husband without the word. It's the way that you live. It's your lifestyle in the home. And first and most importantly, dwell with them. Don't walk away. Don't walk away physically, don't walk away emotionally. Dwell with them. Don't abandon them. Remember your covenant of promise that you made to God, that you declared to your wife, those promises of marriage. And God has by that made you one flesh, so be determined to protect and preserve your union. Dwell with them. That is the directive. Are there reasons and situations that may cause that to shatter and break and not function? Absolutely, we know that is the case. But generally speaking, this is the goal and the objective that God gives to every husband married to an unconverted wife. Dwell with them. Live with them. Paul said a similar thing. He doesn't go into all the detail here that Peter does, but look at 1 Corinthians chapter 7. 1 Corinthians and chapter number 7, Paul addresses this as well. Beginning in verse number 12, Paul writes. He's going to speak now on a subject that he identifies is not something that has been written before and talked about. Peter will pick up on this a little bit later when he writes his letters, but Paul doesn't get this from Moses or some other passage of Scripture. It's God speaking, as we learned this morning, the spirit of God communicating through the apostle, the mind of God, as Paul is using his own thoughts and spiritual thinking to work this out. And so you see it in these words, but to the rest speak I not the Lord. So he's, this is not something that has happened and been spoken before that he's drawing from, but he is now speaking. under the inspiration of the Spirit. And he says, if any brother hath a wife that believeth not, that's kind of what Peter's talking about, right? If you have a wife who's not a believer, and she is pleased to dwell with you, then don't put her away. Live with her, love her, care for her. And the woman which hath a husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. So the goal in all these situations here that exists with a believing and an unbelieving marriage partner is the preservation of the marriage, always the preservation. Just because you're saved and she's not doesn't mean that you should just immediately get rid of her and move on and find a Christian woman. That's not the way the scriptures teach it. Dwell with him, live with him. Paul goes on to say, give some arguments and reasons here, for the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife. She has the power to bring cleansing to her own husband. in marriage, whether that is unto salvation or not is somewhat debated, but she will have a cleansing influence on him if she's living her life the right way. And the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband. Else, where were your children unclean? But now they are wholly set apart, sanctified. But if the unbelieving depart, if the unbelieving mate says, I'm out of here, I don't want this Christian thing, I'm not interested, I'm gone. Let them go. In that case, let them go. Let them depart. A brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases. For God has called us to peace. For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? Or how knowest thou, O man, whether you might save your wife? So by dwelling with them, there is that possibility that Paul and Peter both say that you may have an influence upon your mate to their salvation. That's the possibility that is That is there, and then finally in verse 17, but as God hath distributed to every man, God has given to everyone a certain measure and allotment. As the Lord hath called everyone, so let him walk, and so ordain I in all the churches. Whatever the situation that God has given to you, recognize it has been distributed to you by God. It is from God. And the goal is not to walk out of marriage. The goal is to dwell with them. Do everything you can to be an influence upon their life. Now, going back to Peter. First Peter in chapter number three. Husbands, likewise ye husbands dwell with them. We know just by human nature and by being involved with many through the years of ministry, that there are many obstacles to keeping a marriage together. Many obstacles. Husbands must cultivate and work this marriage and make it fruitful. She may never submit to God. She may never fully submit to your leadership. but you do have the power to influence her and bless her and make your marriage better as long as she is committed to being faithful to you as your husband dwell with them. But Peter is saying more here than just cohabitating together, dwell with them, taking up space together. The goal is to influence her and even see her submit to God's word and share your faith together with you. To dwell with them effectively, Peter goes on to say, dwell with them according to knowledge. Husbands must have some kind of knowledge. You've gathered all the important information to make your dwelling with them effective and effectual. So the question is, what knowledge is he talking about? What knowledge is being emphasized? In more recent times, many modern authors He read marriage books, have suggested that Peter's referring to the man having the knowledge of his wife. That's the key knowledge for the man to succeed. He has to have the knowledge of his wife. He must know her personality. He must know what makes her happy. Have the knowledge of his wife. Well, I believe there's some value in that knowledge. I'm not saying that's not a useful knowledge, but is this the kind of knowledge that Peter is referring to? Is this the knowledge of all knowledge? Men, if you're gonna succeed, you gotta have knowledge. Knowledge of what? Until more recently this, was understood to be knowledge that is critical for the husband to study and know was to understand what God has taught him in his word concerning the matter of marriage. If you're going to succeed in marriage with marriage to an unconverted woman, you must have the knowledge of God in order to do that. Nowhere does it say, have the knowledge of the wife. That's sort of inserted in there, but it doesn't say that. And so what is the greatest knowledge of all? The scriptures make that clear. It's to know God, to know him, to know his word, to know his will. How can a man succeed in a marriage who doesn't know God? But God's will is for him. The knowledge of God's word and will. That's the knowledge Peter is referring to. If a believing husband hopes to have an influence in the life of his unbelieving wife, then the husband must study the mind of God on the subject. And as he studies the word of God, what do we know happens? The Spirit of God begins to work where the Word of God is going into the mind of the believer. Where is that man going to find the leadership of the Spirit of God as he deals with the problems? He's going to find it from the Spirit of God, which comes from the Word of God. That's the knowledge he must have if he is going to succeed and be effective. This kind of relationship of a believer and unbeliever in marriage requires the husband to possess knowledge. We know from the scriptures that understanding is a byproduct, an outcome of knowledge. And we understand from the scriptures that wisdom is the outcome of understanding. So where does it all begin? Where does this man get his wisdom? Where does he get his understanding? It's from the knowledge of God and from his word. That the spirit will use and cause him to be wise in dealing with the matters of a difficult marriage. A believing husband married to an unbelieving wife cannot be ignorant. concerning God's will. You cannot be foolish and expect a good outcome. If you're a man that is married to an unbelieving wife, Peter is saying that the only way to have a good outcome is through knowledge. And if you don't have knowledge, you're going to be subject to many ignorant and foolish decisions that you will make apart from the word of God saturating your mind. And you will not influence an unbelieving wife with foolish and ignorant behavior that is not guided by the word of God. So dwell with them according to knowledge. Peter adds here in our verse, instruction to a man in this situation, that he is to continually to give honor unto his wife, giving honor unto your wife. Yes, a wife who is disobedient to God, A wife who is not in alignment with your leadership. Honor her. Give her honor. Honor her for the role that she is in in the marriage. Honor her for whatever she provides in terms of blessing the family. Honor her. And by this giving honor, Peter is saying the action that he's referring to here is a grace action. Giving is a grace action. It's not one that she has to earn. Give her freely. It's a gift. Gift her. showing through your words and actions essentially the value you have placed on her in your relationship, giving honor. A wife who is disobedient to God's word will one day give an account for her life to God. The husband is not her judge. He must search for what is good and commendable and give her freely the honor that is due. For those things that you recognize and identify as having value. This is how you can encourage her by focusing on the good. You are building her up. with the awareness that she is the weaker vessel in the marriage. By weaker vessel, Peter is using an adjective here to describe her. He describes the wife as being weaker, various ways to understand what that means, But when we take it within our context here, what Peter's talking about, the man recognizes she is not a believer. She has no spiritual power operating in her. That puts her into a category of being weaker. She doesn't have what he has. She doesn't have what the godly women, the holy women, the daughters of Sarah had, the courageous ones. She doesn't have that. Peter worked out in those verses for the wife. She is not a woman of faith. She is a weaker vessel. Is she physically weaker? Generally, yes. Is she normally more fragile emotionally? Generally, yes. But I don't believe that's the thing Peter is focusing on primarily here. He's not getting into the psychology of the woman or her physical makeup. He's getting into who she is not. She is not a spiritual woman. She doesn't have spiritual power. She doesn't have courage and faith. She's weak. Know that she's weak. And you will have to go out of your way to kind of strengthen and encourage her. A woman without faith who lives a life of disobedience to God, where does she get her strength? Where does she get her hope? The only resource that Peter is saying is from her husband who is gracious toward her, who is kind toward her. She doesn't have the strength that other spiritual women have. And because she is more fragile and can be broken and damaged in her role as a wife, therefore believing husbands are instructed and encouraged to give honor to her as someone who is an heir together of the grace of life. As being heirs together of the grace of life. of life. What is Peter saying here? First, we know what he's not saying. He's not saying that his unbelieving wife will somehow share in the inheritance that Christ received and will share with all of God's children. Look at chapter one. Remember how Peter worked that out. Look at verses three through five. He's not talking about this. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, which according to his abundant mercy hath begotten us again, made us alive spiritually by the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead to an inheritance, spiritual life to an inheritance. that is incorruptible and undefiled and fadeth not away reserved in heaven for you, you who are kept by the power of God through faith unto salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. He's not talking about a woman sharing in that who's unconverted. She can't. What is he talking about? Peter is saying, even though you do not share the gift of eternal life and the inheritance of Christ that Peter spoke of earlier, you do share the gift of life. It's the gift of life. You share life together. This is a gift from God, a special blessing, a grace from God is life. You share life together. And for this reason also, you give honor to your wife. You want her to live together with you and enjoy the life you have. And even though it may not be ideal, it's still a shared life that is a gift of God to you. A gift of life. Sometimes we may not think that life is that wonderful and a great of a gift if we're married to someone who doesn't share our same values. But Peter is saying, you have life together. Life that you have is a gift of God. Enjoy that life together, share that life together, protect that life together. You hope in time that God will, through your life, influence her and bring her to a saving relationship with God. But if that never happens, all those years you spend together is a gift of God to you with her. Enjoy that life. It is a gift from God. Then Peter closes with a warning here. that your prayers be not hindered. Husbands, Christian husbands married to unbelieving wives. Think about this. You've prayed, you've hoped for her salvation. And Peter is saying, don't undermine your prayers by neglecting your duties. There's a great mystery to how God works out his will through our conduct and our prayers, right? Has anyone figured that out? Please talk to me later. I haven't figured it out. How does a sovereign God work out these details? of his own eternal purposes through our conduct and our prayers. We believe that the God who determines the end has also determined the means to accomplish the end. And so therefore, husbands, as Peter is saying, treat your wives properly. If you don't, your prayers will be rendered powerless. hindered, cut off, the value of them cease. Could be an impact on her. Rendered powerless to pray for her and then to mistreat her is hypocritical and your prayers will be cut off. If she is not being influenced by your godly conduct and kind treatment, then don't expect your prayers to make a difference. We all believe in prayer. Can you imagine having a neighbor and every So often you're praying that God would save them, or you bring their name up Wednesday nights and you say, church, will you pray with me? My neighbor needs to be saved. And so we all pray to that end. But what benefit is that prayer if there is never a word spoken, if there is never an effort to reach that lost neighbor? Peter is using the same reasoning here. To pray for the salvation of your wife or husband, and you don't do those things that actually promote his salvation to take place. The prayers have no purpose. They're meaningless. They're hindered. I know a lot of different interpretations of these things are floating around, but these are how this verse has been historically, biblically understood. And I trust that you see these things this morning clearly. Peter's counsel is given to men who are married to wives who are not willing to submit themselves to God's word. Peter describes certain actions that husbands ought to do if they hope for her conversion and pray for it. You're to dwell with them. You're to dwell with them with the knowledge of God's will. Fill your mind with the truth and the spirit will guide you as you minister and work out your lives together. Give them honor, giving constantly, continuing to show and speak of their worth and value to her, to you personally. Don't forget that she's a weaker vessel. She doesn't have the strength, the faith of other women. She's going to be more easily wounded and broken, discouraged. because she doesn't have that strength that godly women have. And so Peter's counsel is for a believing marriage also this morning. So I encourage you to think of these things, men, as general principles. They're not just for men married to unbelieving wives. These are for you. as a believing husband, even with a believing wife. There's much here for you. And I pray that God will take these things and help you to apply them. These are not less important to you because Peter's addressing a husband with an unbelieving wife. They're not less important. They're just as important. And I pray that God would help all of us as husbands today to be more committed and resolved to treating our wives as they deserve to be treated. Father, thank you for your word and the exhortations of it. May we be challenged and encouraged, rebuked, corrected as we contemplate these things today. And I ask these things in your Son's name and for your glory.