But people are on edge. There are road rage incidents. We have a neighborhood app that just people can post stuff about our neighborhood and our neighbors are all snipping at each other. people are snapping at each other. I don't know if it's something about the change in weather or the time of the year or just before the holidays. The President's tweets have gotten all the more partisan. I don't know if you've snapped at your children or at your spouse lately, but it seems that maybe it's just the world we live in that things are like that right now. We just had a guy shoot up a party just on the other side of the church on Sunday morning, killed one person and injured three others. Our passage tonight helps us with this. So let's turn in your copy of God's Word with me to Matthew chapter 6. Matthew chapter six, as we resume our Bible study series on wisdom from God. And we come tonight to the last two verses in this wisdom section on prayer that Jesus is teaching us. Remember, Jesus is teaching against the fear of man. He's teaching on the fear of the Lord, which is the beginning of wisdom. And he's teaching on the fear of the Lord in almsgiving, and then in prayer, and then in fasting. But before he moves on from prayer to fasting, having taught us now how to pray and what has come to be called the Lord's Prayer, He makes one final comment about prayer. Now, if you were to think back to all of these petitions that we've been studying and going through over the past few months, we've taken our sweet time in going through these. If you think back on all of them, the hallowing of God's name, the coming of His kingdom, the establishment and the accomplishment of His will, our daily bread, the forgiveness of our debts, the leading us not into temptation, and the deliverance from the evil one. If you were to think back on all of those, I wonder which one you would most like to revisit, or which one you would most like to hear Jesus expound on just a little bit more. It's striking to me that of all of these petitions, the one that Jesus makes a final comment on is this petition, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. So let's read what he says beginning in verse 14. For if you forgive others their trespasses, your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." So what are these verses doing here? Of all the areas of the prayer he could have focused on in his final comments on prayer, why is it that Jesus zeroes in on forgiveness here at the end? And you have to try to answer that by making sense of that little word for, which begins verse 14. It's a connecting word that introduces a reason for something. It could just as easily be translated because. And what I think it is, is I think it's connected all the way back to verse 9. where Jesus says, pray then like this. Remember that? Hutas un prasukas de humas in the Greek. Pray then like this, our father, et cetera, because if you forgive others their trespasses, then your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you don't forgive others their trespassers, then neither will your father forgive your trespasses. So why is this condition, notice it's a condition, why is this conditional statement grounding everything that Jesus is teaching in the Lord's Prayer? That's the question that I've been asking. I don't know if I've gotten fully to the answer of it, but I think that the answer, at least part of the answer or one of the answers, is that one of the biggest obstacles to genuine Christian prayer is an unforgiving heart. an unforgiving heart cannot truly pray in the way Jesus is teaching us, his people, that we must pray. In other words, Jesus is teaching that there's some relationship between Christian forgiveness and Christian prayer. And we see this teaching, this emphasis from Jesus in other places of scripture as well. So in Mark 11, verse 25, Jesus says, whenever you stand praying, whenever you stand praying, forgive. If you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses." So there in Mark 11 you see this same connection between Christian forgiveness and Christian prayer. And we see this later in the book of Matthew as well. So turn with me for a moment to Matthew 18. Matthew 18 verses 21 to 35. We've looked at that before. Let's look at it again together. I think Matthew 18, 21 through 35 sheds light on these two verses that we're looking at tonight. So here's what it says, a familiar parable, kingdom parable of Jesus, beginning in verse 21 of Matthew 18. Then Peter came up to him and said, Lord, how often will my brother sin against me and I forgive him? As many as seven times? Jesus said to him, I don't say to you seven times, but 70 times seven. Therefore, the kingdom of heaven, remember what Jesus is teaching about in the Sermon on the Mount, the kingdom of heaven, it's wise instruction from the sage king about how the citizens of his kingdom, that kingdom of heaven, are to live and flourish. Therefore, the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. That's more than you'd make in a lifetime. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold with his wife and children, all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees imploring him, have patience with me and I will pay you everything. And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. when that same servant went out he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, so an insignificant amount compared to what he himself had been forgiven, and seizing him and began to choke him saying, ìPay what you owe.î So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, ìHave patience with me and I will pay you.î He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed. And they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. Then his master summoned him and said to him, you wicked servant, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant as I had mercy on you? And in anger, his master delivered him to the jailers until he should pay all his debt. Now listen to this, verse 35. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you if you do not forgive your brother from your heart." That's what the kingdom of heaven may be compared to. And I think this sheds light on our two verses. I think that an unforgiving heart is an obstacle to Christian prayer. And I think that's why our two verses are grounding the Lord's prayer. Pray in this manner, Jesus teaches, because if you forgive others their trespasses, then your Heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, then neither will your Heavenly Father forgive your trespasses. The main point taught here is taught throughout the scriptures and it's really very simple. A forgiven people are a forgiving people. We've seen this before from Jesus. A forgiven people are a forgiving people. So don't pray to God in your prayers. Don't come to God in prayer and pray to God as though he forgives the unforgiving. Don't pray to God as though he forgives the unforgiving. So we have to be careful. We don't want to view God as just a pushover who says, well, you know, you're justified, you're forgiven. It doesn't matter to me whether you're upset with your brother or your sister. It doesn't matter to me whether you hold bitterness or anger or contempt or unforgiveness in your heart. It does matter. The Bible is very clear. It says that if you forgive others their sins, then your Heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, their sins, neither will God forgive your sins. There are no unforgiving people in God's kingdom, in the kingdom of heaven. Now this doesn't mean that a Christian never has moments where an unforgiving spirit rises up from within them. We all are engaged in that spiritual warfare that we talked about even two weeks ago against the word, the flesh, and the evil one, the devil. And our sinful flesh, the old man, does not want to forgive any hurtful personal injuries against ourself. God's forgiven people, though, are, without exception, a forgiving people. We're not perfectly forgiving people. We struggle through this, don't we? So let's take notice here and examine the conditional language that Jesus uses. If you forgive them, then God will forgive you. If you do not forgive them, then neither will God forgive you. So is this a good work that we do in order to merit and obtain forgiveness and earn our pardon from God? Like, first we have to forgive, and then God will forgive us. The whole Bible is clear that it can't be that. It can't mean that, right? So the Bible says that we are forgiven. We're saved by grace through faith and that not of ourselves. It's not a work, lest anyone should boast. So how can God say to us as people, I'll forgive you if you forgive others? It's a condition. It really is a condition, isn't it? I mean, it's obviously a condition. I'll forgive you if you forgive others. It's a condition. But yeah, it's a condition that will be met in the heart of every gospel believer. That condition will be met in the heart of every gospel believer. How can you believe the gospel? That you were so wicked, this is part of the gospel, that you were so wicked that you deserved everlasting torment. and so offensive to God that he would reject you eternally, and yet he has reached down to love you, sent his son to die for you, and he'd actually like to be alone with you in a prayer closet, speaking to you, hearing from you. How can you believe in that God and then not forgive those who sin against you? How can you believe in that God in those situations? It's impossible. So if you're not forgiving others, it's either because you have drifted dangerously far away from the gospel, or because you've never understood the gospel at all. And so there's this glorious promise here. You forgive others, and I will forgive you. And it's met by focusing on the gospel. It's a fruit of the gospel. In other words, you need a new heart. to be a forgiving person. If you have a new heart, that's Jesus' emphasis throughout the Sermon on the Mount, the heart. If you have a new heart, you will manifest forgiveness as the Father has forgiven you. And I think this is what Matthew 18 helps us to understand. If you're not a forgiving person, That's an indication that you're not a Christian, if you're not a forgiving person. Because to be a forgiving person, it requires a new heart. It requires a heart that's actually believing in the gospel, actually believing what Jesus has suffered and done for his people for the forgiveness of all of their sins. And so if you are an unforgiving person, the application of what Jesus teaches here is for you to repent of all of your sins and believe on Jesus. Because when you, in faith, savingly turn from your sin to Jesus, and you're washed of all of your sin, you receive a new heart, a forgiving heart, your old heart, that unforgiving heart is taken away, and God gives you a new heart, a heart of flesh that beats for Him. and so revels in the magnitude of the forgiveness that you, though undeserved, have received. That it's a joy now. It's a joy to forgive those who have sinned against you. But for believers tonight, even in a room this size, there are surely several here tonight struggling in this area who have grown a little cold, who are harboring unforgiveness toward someone who has betrayed you, or hurt you, or disappointed you, or wronged you. And you know you need to forgive them, but you're struggling to actually do it. And what I want to do in the time that we have left is to just think through some practical ways that we can forgive others as Jesus has forgiven us. How can we forgive others as Jesus has forgiven us? Five things. The first thing that I would encourage you to do is pray. An unforgiving heart is an obstacle to prayer, but prayer is help to an unforgiving heart. It's like a warm fire that thaws a heart that's grown cold. Pray for that person. Pray regularly for that person. The Father would give them their daily bread and forgive them their sins and lead them not into temptation and deliver them from the evil one. Yes, Max? Yes, and pray that God's name be hallowed. Amen. In that person's life, so praying for that person. Begin praying for them, but also begin praying for yourself. Ask for grace to help. Ask for the Lord to thaw and to warm the coldness of your heart, that bitterness towards that person. When someone deeply hurts you, even when someone just lightly offends you, All right, which happens all the time. You cannot forgive that person in your own strength and power. You cannot forgive just by reaching deep down in yourself and mustering up the will from deep within you. It's not there. You must have the grace of God. And so pray for that grace. Yes, Wayne? I just love this particular song. Yeah, that's right. When you forgive, you're the prisoner that is set free, and that is very true. The second thing I would encourage you to do is to bring to mind those whom you have sinned against. whom you have betrayed or disappointed or wronged. And you need to go to those people and you need to ask them for forgiveness. This actually needs to be a pattern of your life. If you're a believer, this should be a pattern of your life. Husbands and wives tonight, this needs to be a pattern in in your marriage, family, should be a pattern in the family. We all sin against one another in many ways. We just sang it earlier, oh to grace how great a debtor daily I'm constrained to be. When you do so, when you seek out forgiveness from someone that you've wronged, you need to seek them, you need to ask them for that forgiveness that you don't deserve. For some of you, You need to go to the very person that you're bitter against and seek their forgiveness for something that you've done against them in retaliation, or something you've said about them, or something you've thought about them. The more aware you allow yourself to be of your own sins against others, and the more intentional you are about confessing your sins and seeking out forgiveness and reconciliation, the more inclined you will then be to forgive others who have sinned against you. The third thing I would encourage you to do is to remember and rehearse the gospel. Matthew 6.12 where it says, forgive us our debts as we also have been forgiven or have forgiven our debtors. That reminds us that sin is a debt. Remember we talked about this, sin is a debt. When we sin, we're accumulating a debt, and that debt is insurmountable. That debt is something that we cannot possibly ever pay. It's like the first servant to the king in the parable that we just read, only worse. It's such an infinitely large debt that we simply cannot pay it. That's what sin does. That's what sin is. It's a debt that's accumulating. But remember and rehearse to your own soul the good news of the gospel, that Jesus died on the cross to pay that debt, to pay the debt that you owe but are unable to pay. Listen to how the Apostle Paul says it in Colossians 2. I love this. Colossians 2, 13 and 14, Paul says, and you who were dead in your trespasses, same word as in our passage, and the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made alive together with him, having forgiven us all our trespasses." How? By canceling the record of debt that stood against us with its legal demands, this he set aside, nailing it to the cross. I love that, we just sang that as well earlier, all, right? nailed to the cross. What the Romans would do in the first century is that they would put the charge of the one who was receiving the death penalty on the cross. Of course, what was Jesus charged with? He was charged with insurrection. That's right. He was charged with saying he was king of the Jews. And so that was what was nailed to the cross. What the Bible says here is that for all of you who are in Christ, that insurmountable debt that you owed, God the Father nailed the record of your debt to the cross of his son, Jesus Christ, so that when Jesus was put to death on the cross, he was paying the penalty specifically for the debt that you owed. That's one picture that the Bible uses for forgiveness. Forgiveness is paying or canceling a debt. Forgiveness then is costly. It's costly. And it's the fool, remember this is wisdom literature, it's the fool who says, I am not going to forgive that person who wronged me. Even though I'm counting on God to forgive the debt that I owe, the sin which I deserve, everlasting, conscious, physical torment in hell forever, God will forgive me that. But I can't bear to forgive this person their sin against me. That's the way of the fool. So be wise and remember the gospel. Take the time to rehearse the gospel to your soul. Remind yourself of how much you have been forgiven. When you really feel the weight of that, you will not be able to not forgive others of their sins against you. Fourth thing, we're asking the question, how can we forgive others as Jesus has forgiven us? So say you have prayed for the person and for yourself. You've sought out forgiveness from others. You've rehearsed the gospel to your own soul, and you're ready. You want to forgive the person. So what does forgiveness really look like? Is it just an apology? Is it just saying the words, I forgive you? How can we forgive them as Jesus has forgiven you? So here's the fourth thing. I would encourage you to see that forgiveness is a conscious decision of the will. It's not a feeling. It's a conscious decision not to remember the offense. This is important. Forgiveness does not place the forgiven person in your debt. This doesn't mean that you easily forget the hurt or the transgression. You don't. Forgiveness, no matter what you may have heard, it is not forgetting. Let me say that again. Forgiveness is not forgetting. Forgiveness is an active choice not to remember. There's a difference. Forgiveness is an active choice not to remember the sin that was done against you. So we choose not to hold that sin against the forgiven person. We must choose not to bring it up over and over and over again. We must choose not to bring it up to others in order to harm the person or defame the person who we have forgiven. We don't save it in our back pocket for a later argument. I remember one time I was doing marriage counseling, and one spouse claimed to have forgiven the other, but was like a historian, just listing and chronicling and going off on the other spouse for every single sin ever committed over the course of the whole marriage, over multiple times of meeting together, or just remembering everything, and remembering everything every time there's something more, bringing it all back up again. That's not forgiveness. Forgiveness is an active choice not to remember. You have to fight the temptation to hold a person that you have forgiven in your debt. They're not in your debt. So fifth and finally, I want to remind you that forgiveness is both an event And it's a process. It's both an event and it's a process. So sometimes some of us are confused. We think that forgiveness is just an event. I go to that person and I apologize. I go to that person and I say, hey, I forgive you for what you did. And there, I've done it. And that's it. And that's not it. Forgiveness is an event, a transaction where you actually do forgive someone, but then it's a process of continual remembrance of the gospel, continual application of the gospel, and continually saying, okay, I do forgive that person. Tim Lane is co-author of the excellent book, How People Change. He writes this, so helpful. When we forgive someone, it is an event. I forgive you, but that is not the end of the matter. Every time I remember the offense, I must continue to forgive. I forgive you and will continue to forgive you. I will not act on my sinful desire for revenge. Are you fighting a sinful desire for revenge? Keep fighting. My desire for Dayspring is to be a scandalously forgiving people. How can we become a scandalously forgiving people? When we look at our life, when we look at our transgressions, and we look at what we have done to deserve an everlasting, eternal torment, that's what we would deserve for what we have done. And when we understand that our Father is the one who crucified His Son, Our Father is the one who nailed the record of our debt to the cross of Jesus Christ. When we understand that all of our sins, all of our sins, past, present, and future, have been forgiven, then we ourselves will have a forgiving heart. The Apostle Paul, in Colossians 3.12, he says this, Put on, then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, put on compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another. And if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other, as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. Let us pray. Our Heavenly Father, give us grace and let forgiveness grow and flow in our hearts because unforgiveness is a great obstacle to prayer. Remind us of the gospel so that we might forgive others. Lord, our prayer is that Dayspring would be a people of forgiven sinners and forgiving sinners, where great sins are forgiven for the sake of your glory, for the sake of your son's mission, for the sake of the unity of the one Spirit into which all your people have been immersed. We ask these things in Jesus' name. Amen.