On last time we looked at chapter 4 because we weren't sure if we were going to have more opportunities. The good news is we have this opportunity and one more so we not only get one look at chapter 3 but two looks at chapter 3. We'll read the whole chapter and then this time we'll take a broader view of the chapter and then look at some more specifics the next time. Ruth chapter 3. The Naomi, her mother-in-law, said to her, my daughter, should I not seek rest for you that it may be well with you? Is not Boaz our relative with whose young women you were? See, he is winnowing barley tonight at the threshing floor. Wash, therefore, and anoint yourself, and put on your cloak, and go down to the threshing floor. But do not make yourself known to the man until he has finished eating and drinking. But when he lies down, observe the place where he lies. Then go and uncover his feet and lie down, and he will tell you what to do. And she replied, all that you say I will do. So she went down to the threshing floor and did just as her mother-in-law had said, had commanded her. And when Boaz had eaten and drunk and his heart was merry, he went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain. Then she came softly and uncovered his feet and lay down. At midnight, the man was startled and turned over and behold, a woman lay at his feet. He said, who are you? And she answered, I am Ruth, your servant. Spread your wings over your servant, for you are a redeemer. And he said, may you be blessed by the Lord, my daughter. You have made this last kindness greater than the first, in that you have not gone after young men, whether poor or rich. And now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you ask, for all my fellow townsmen know that you are a worthy woman. And now it is true that I am a Redeemer. Yet there is a Redeemer nearer than I. Remain tonight and in the morning. If he will redeem you, good. Let him do it. But if he is not willing to redeem you, then As the Lord lives, I will redeem you. Lie down until morning.' So she lay at his feet until the morning, but arose before one could recognize another. And he said, let it not be known that a woman came to the threshing floor. And he said, bring me the garment that you were wearing and hold it out. And she held it. And he measured out six measures of barley and put it on her. Then she went into the city. And when she came to her mother-in-law, she said, how did you fare, my daughter? Then she told her all that the man had done for her, saying, These six measures of barley he gave to me, for he said to me, You must not go back empty-handed to your mother-in-law. She replied, Wait, my daughter, until you learn how the matter turns out. For the man will not rest, but will settle the matter today." Amen. This chapter is filled with all kinds of intrigue, and there are many different interpretations of what we see here in this chapter. Tonight, we won't look at those details. Tonight, I want to take a broader view. Again, in our last message, we will talk about those details because those details are important. I'll touch on them. But tonight, I want to give us a broader view. Tonight, I want to touch on something that I believe is much more fundamental. If you remember, we're looking at this as a sort of three-step process. the idea of pain and providence and passion. And we already looked at the passion of marriage in chapter four, but most of the book of Ruth is about providence. We start off with pain. I mean, there is this an obvious, obvious picture of the pain of marriage. And when I say the pain of marriage, oftentimes when we talk about that and marriage being painful, we think about the sins that individuals commit against one another. But the pain that we see in the book of Ruth is not the pain that is the result of sins that people commit against one another. This is not the sin of abuse or adultery or abandonment or anything like that. This is the sin. This is the pain of just life itself. Amen. Even without the sin that we commit against one another, marriages experience pain. And that pain, as I've said before, is acknowledged even in the vows. Our vows acknowledge the painful reality of the relationship. For better or worse, richer or poorer, and health or sickness, right? And in case you don't get all of those other pictures of the potential pain of marriage, we end with what? Until somebody dies. Amen? That's the last of the vows, right? Good stuff, bad stuff, and you're going, OK, all right, I'll take the good with the bad. And in case you're wondering if you're just going to have good, ultimately, marriage ends with the separation of death. There will be pain. There will be pain. Not because marriage is a bad thing. It's a good thing. Marriage doesn't bring pain. In fact, life is pain. Amen, somebody. Life is filled with pain. We live in a fallen world. And why is this important? It's important for a number of reasons, not least of which we have bought into this mythological fantasy that says that if you just pick the right one, one, one, one, then there will be all pleasure and no pain. And that's a lie from the pit of hell. It's a lie. And it's a destructive lie because here's what happens. If we believe in, in, in this Greco Roman myth of romantic love, that somehow means that we will have all mountaintops and no valleys, all pleasure and no pain. If we believe that, and if we believe that if we just get the right one, we will spend the rest of our days on the mountaintop and it will be all love songs all the time. Then when we get married and run into real life and run into real pain, what is our first assumption? I must not have chosen the right one. Because everybody knows that if you choose the right one, one, one, then it's all mountaintops and no valleys. It's all pleasure and no pain. So pain in my marriage means I must have chosen wrongly. And if I've chosen wrongly, maybe I need to choose again. And there are a lot of young couples who are right there, complete and utter disillusionment because they believed that they had found the right one. They had found the magic, that their love was the love to end all loves because their love was the greatest love in the history of love. And in fact, love would have to be redefined because this love is so much more lovely than any other love that love has ever known. And now they got pain too. If you can't say amen, you ought to say ouch. And so there is this discouragement, this disillusionment, and it's sad, and it becomes even more painful. And what's even worse is that when you are in the midst of your marriage and in the midst of that pain, you're there. Amen? You don't just get a do-over. You can't just... They're still there. So if you let this disillusionment drive you, you will go deeper into pain because you are not doing the things necessary to go through it. Are you following? But pain is not the only reality of marriage. There is the pain of marriage and there is the, passion of marriage we've looked at that but in the middle of that and this is most of the book in the middle of that there is providence providence and that's what we see here we see a picture of providence providence is important Because providence reminds us that even in the midst of our pain, God is there. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, you are with me. We don't have pain in marriage because God has forgotten or forsaken us. We are able to go through pain in marriage because God is with us. We trust his providence. We trust his providence. But there is another piece of this puzzle. Oftentimes, again, because we believe this myth, we don't trust in providence when we are preparing for marriage. I don't need providence in wisdom. I just need the right one. And how do you find the right one? Well, you know, somewhere off around in this area in here, you just know. You will feel magical things and you will know magical things. Who needs providence and wisdom when you've got magic? Right? This brings us to another theological issue, and it's the issue of mysticism. Mysticism. Mysticism is the idea that we know God and we know His will through immediate revelation. And when I say immediate, I mean that in the theological sense, I'm using it as a theological term, not immediate as in right now, immediately, but immediate as in without mediation. Without mediation. Mediation like what? Mediation like the Word of God. Mediation like the wisdom of applying the word of God. Mediation like the wisdom of the people of God. See, that's mediation, right? I don't need mediation to get to God's truth. Mysticism says I can get there immediately. I can get there without a mediator by just having the right spiritual experience. And what does that look like? It looks pretty ridiculous. Things like this. Girl, I know he's the one. How do you know he's the one? Because just I woke up, I woke up last night, just out of nowhere at 106. What? Yes. Not 105, not 107. I opened my eyes and it was 106. Okay, girl, he's 1.6 meters tall. Confirmation. Now we laugh, but those are the kinds of things that people use in order to find the will of God. How do you find the will of God? You shut off your mind, you close your Bible, close your eyes and try to feel something. You look around for signs and try to see something so that you can get an immediate revelation from God. Then you don't have anything to worry about because it's a done deal. Well, now let's take that back to what we talked about earlier. Problem number one, we believe that in marriage, if you find the right one, if you find the magic, then you will have all mountaintops and no valleys, all pleasure and no pain. Secondly, we believe that you find the magic through this immediate direct revelation from God with a closed Bible and a closed mind and closed ears to what anybody has to say, waiting for a sign. So now not only are you discouraged in your relationship when the pain comes, but you're also now doubting God who gave you the signs that you decided to believe in the first place. Do you see how this works? It just gets worse. But do we see any of that in the book of Ruth? Or anywhere else in the Bible for that matter? Absolutely not. So, pain. It's real. And we're not just talking about the pain that we experienced because we sin against each other. In the best of circumstances, in the best of marriages, there's pain. Your wedding, your wedding day, greatest day ever, and people cry. Why? Why do you cry on the greatest day ever? Well, they're tears of joy. Not really. It's pain. It's pain. Because you stand there and you think about the home that you grew up in and the people who love you and the people who you love. And as of tonight, I don't live with them anymore. As parents, we look at that one who to us will always be this little thing that we brought home, right? We look at that one who just a few years ago couldn't even pick out their socks without us. And now they're getting married and they're leaving. What? There's pain there. Now, again, it's a good thing, but leaving and cleaving is painful. Amen? So even under the best circumstances, it's painful. It's difficult. Two sinful, selfish people learning how to live with one another and negotiate that, right? I mean, you look at people who've been married 30, 40, 50 years, and it looks, it's just, it's this beautiful dance. I mean, they just, they just, they just work. It's just awesome. It's beautiful. It's Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers, you know? It's just, it's awesome. but it took a long time for it to look like a dance. It didn't start like that. The first couple of years, it was a whole bunch of stepping on each other's toes and wait, you're going that way. I thought we were going this way. So what's the answer? The answer is providence. providence. So here's what I want us to see in this third chapter. I want us to learn how to trust providence. I want us to learn how to trust God in this process. I want us to see Ruth and Boaz and the providence of God. I want us to see that this is not two people waiting for a lightning strike. This is not magic. This is providence. Hear me. Hear me. You who sit there and think that, you know, it just, it just, it won't ever happen. Providence. You who sit there and think I have to do this on my own. Providence. Providence. And for all of the rest of us who sit there and look at other couples, cause this is not just a problem with the couple who wants to get married. The problem is not just that they are trusting in this Greco Roman myth that they're waiting for Cupid to strike, that they're not trusting in providence. The problem is that the rest of us are not trusting in providence either. So our hands are off. Hope you come back with a good one. Hope that works out for you. That's not what we see in the text. So from both ends, we need to see this. Several things. Number one, I want you to see how God in his providence uses the family. He uses the family to protect this couple. We see that in those first few verses. Look again at Ruth chapter three. So she went down to the threshing floor. I'm sorry, I need to go back up to verse one. And Naomi, her mother-in-law said to her, my daughter. Now notice what didn't happen. Before we read what happened again, notice what didn't happen. Ruth does not come home. and say to Naomi, Naomi, I think I found the one. He is this, he is that, he is, oh, this man. That's not what happens. Ruth doesn't come home and announce that she's been struck by Cupid. She does not come home and announce that she's found the one. That's not what happens. What happens? Actually, the opposite. It's Naomi who says, girl, I think we got one. Naomi, her mother-in-law said to her, my daughter, should I not seek rest for you? that it may be well with you? Is not Boaz our relative, with whose young women you were? See, he is winnowing barley tonight, and so on and so forth." And she gives her specific instructions. This is providence. God is using Ruth's family providentially to guide her through the process of finding her husband. And doesn't that make sense? Doesn't that make all the sense in the world when we understand the nature of the family? When we look at passages, for example, like Ephesians chapter 6, verses 1 through 4, it's written about your parents and the Lord. Honor your father and your mother, which is the first commandment with a promise. that they may go well with you and you may live long upon the land. Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." Do we somehow believe that that does not include preparing our children for marriage and walking with them through the process of choosing a mate? Do we somehow believe that, hey, being a child, learning how to brush your teeth, learning how to, you know, to bathe yourself, learning how to, these things are important and God has given me to you as your father, as your mother, to make sure that I teach you how to do these very important things like tie your shoes. I think I may have found someone who I'm going to marry. Tying your shoes I can help you with. This one you do on your own. Really? Really. Because that same child just a few weeks ago was thinking about going to university and you sat them down and looked at all the potential schools, talked about how much they cost, how much money you have, which one is stronger in this major versus that major, probably went with them on a visit for their university. But when they're getting married, You do that one without me. Come see me when somebody's ready to pay LaBolla. I don't find that in the text. And it makes no sense whatsoever that we would take very seriously our parental responsibility for raising, training, discipling, mentoring, walking with our children. And then on this most important of decisions, we wash our hands of it and say, you do this one on your own. No. Not only is that completely illogical, but that's not what we see here in the text. Ruth doesn't come back and make an announcement. And again, Ruth is not a child. Not only is she a grown woman, but she's been married before. She's a widow whose husband died. So we're not even talking about someone, you know, who's just, who doesn't know anything. So if there was ever anyone who could say, ah, you got this, ah, you can handle this. It would have been Naomi. Ah, you know this, you've been married before, you know what this is, you know how this goes, go for it. No, Naomi says, here's what you do. And Ruth's response is not, I'm grown. This is my love life. What is Ruth's response? Look back at the text. Verse five, and she replied, all that you say I will do. Can I ask you a question? 16 year old, 17 year old, 20 year old. Ruth's a grown woman who's been married before, who trusts that God by his providence has put Naomi in her life in this position. And this grown woman who's been married before says, all that you say, I will do. Who do you think you are? That you would say to your parents, that you would say to your family, this is my love life. You have no business here. Now, hear me, here's what I did not say. I did not say, you know, your family needs to arrange your marriage. Why do I make that correction? Because people accuse me of stuff like that. Right? And then they said, well, you know what he says. And I go, wait, where did I say that? Well, you didn't say it. But that time when you were talking about Ruth, that's what you meant. Not what I said, not what I meant. I have a tendency. It gets me in trouble sometimes. But here's my tendency. If it's what I mean, it's usually what I say. Amen? So what am I saying here? Here's what I'm saying. The providence of God. Again, how do we know? How do I know? And how many times have I been asked that question? How do you know? How do you know when it's the one? And usually that question comes from people who have cut themselves off from all of God's providential means that he has given to help answer that question. And one of those providential means that he's given is your family. That's all I'm saying. He's given you that providential means. Praise God for his providence. If you have godly family, praise God. Praise God. But you might not. Well, it's good that that's not the only thing he gives. Not only does God use the family, you know, providentially he also uses the civil society, the civil society. And again, you may say, well, I mean, yeah, that's sure. That's great. But you know, this is, this is, this is Israel. Israel is a great civil society. Was it really? Because this is the period of the judges where God is actually punishing them for their disobedience. Huh? And yet God, by his common grace, gives us a civil society. Why is this an important point? Here's why it's an important point. Because I've heard this one from people on both sides of the water. Why do we need a piece of paper? Why do we need a piece of paper? Why do we need church, pastor, ceremony? Why do we need marriage license? Why do we need anything? Because God, by his providence, has also given us civil authorities. And if you were here at the conference yesterday, you heard Pastor Conrad talk about Matthew 19 and the reference there to the Mosaic law and Moses saying to give a woman a certificate of divorce. The fact that that was because of hardness of heart and it was given in order to protect women. It was given to give a woman legal protections in case of abandonment by a man within a time and a context where they had very few remedies. And it was meant as a guard and as a high hurdle to cause men to check themselves when they had a tendency to look and say, oh, I think lightning has struck me again over there. Well, wait a minute, I thought this was the one. Well, I did, too, because, you know, I felt like that all around in this area, and it was so, yeah, that was, you know, and I, that was great. And, you know, the kids that we had together and all of that, that's wonderful. But then, all of a sudden, I'm minding my own business, and this same area gets inflamed again, and here's a, what do you do? if the feeling was the guide in the first place. Do you follow? I just don't feel like I used to. I've fallen out of love with him. I've fallen out of love with her. I've fallen in love with someone else. We don't choose who we fall in love with. The heart wants what it wants. This thing is bigger than both of us, right? These phrases sound familiar. Now, couple that with an environment where there is no civil authority. You're abandoned with all these children over here. Now, what do you do? If all you have is a promise that no one else was witness or party to and that no civil authority will hold either of you accountable for now, what do you do? Well, where do you get that from the text? Well, we get that from the fact that, what does Naomi say? Naomi says, this man is a redeemer. What does that mean? Well, according to the laws of our society and the protection that has been set up for women in our situation, he's one who qualifies under the law to do this for us. That's the civil society protecting vulnerable women. Yeah, well, that's Israel. Do you know what? Praise God for common grace, because in most of the world, there are places in the world where the civil society offers almost no protections for the weak and the vulnerable, almost no protections within the context of marriage. And when there's no protections in the context of marriage, it almost always means that women end up used abandoned and left to raise children on their own with little to no means to do so. And there are places in the world with no protections, but by God's grace, and here's what's so ironic. Where do women scream the loudest about injustice, inequality, male, this, male, that, da, da, da, da, da, in the parts of the world where women are better protected than anywhere else. It's only the places in the world with the wealthiest, healthiest, longest living, most prosperous women in the world that you hear this stuff coming from. And again, I'm not arguing that there are no issues or difficulties, but it's so ironic to me that radical feminism shakes its fists at Christianity when the Christian world, the biblical world is the place where women are safest in this world, most protected in this world, most cared for in this world. Why? Providence. Providence. Providence. And it's interesting, by God's providence he gives us the family and we have a command to submit there. by God's providence he gives us civil authorities and in Romans 13 guess what we have a command to submit there not only a command to submit but also a command we the family has a command to exercise oversight and care the government has a command to exercise oversight and care to punish the evildoer reward the good so it works two ways there's a command to submit and a command to protect and care by God's providence not only that But there's a third place. God uses the community of the godly. He uses the community of the godly, the people of God. This is not just the civil society and civil laws that God is using providentially to protect Ruth and provide for Ruth and also for Boaz. It's also the people of God, we see this in verse, look at verse 11. Boaz says, now, my daughter, do not fear. I will do for you all that you ask, for all my fellow townsmen know that you are a worthy woman. Then look down at verse 14. So she lay at his feet until the morning, but arose before anyone could recognize another. And he said, let it not be known that a woman came to the threshing floor. What is this about? This is about godliness. Righteousness. You know what's so ironic? What's so ironic is there are people who come to this text and they say, well, uncovering his feet. Well, that's sexual. When you read things, it's sexual. Well, actually, no, it's not. That's not what happened here. And there's a couple of reasons that I make that argument. Number one, because it would violate everything that we find in the story about the character of these two. Number two, it would violate everything that we know about leave a right marriage. But number three, he says that he's going to do everything that he's asking, that she's asking. When she uncovered his feet and lay there, she was making a request and the request was not for sex. Because he says, I'm going to do all that you asked. What does he mean? I'm going to speak to the other redeemer and if he'll redeem you, you're redeemed. If he won't, I will redeem you. That's what she's asking. There is zero, zero in this text. And then what sense does this make? Ah, this was a sexual advance. This was a sexual encounter. and in verse 11 he talks about her honor that is known to all the townsmen and in verse 14 he talks about preserving that honor even in the way that she leaves but in the middle between verses 11 and verse 14 they had sex come on now come on that makes no sense whatsoever none these are virtuous people these are godly people God is using a godly man. God is using the community of the righteous. What does that look like in our context? It looks like God using the church. Looks like God using the church. Where do we see God's providence? You who are looking for God's providence. Where do you see it? Well on the one hand you see God's providence in your family. In this process you're not alone. You have a family. Praise God if you have a godly family. Well I don't have a godly family. You have the community of the godly. You have a godly church. Biblical eldership. Well, if this is what God has for us by his providence, we saw earlier that in the family, he gives us this command to submit and to lovingly guide and protect. with the state. Civil government. He's given this command to submit and the command to lovingly protect. So if by his providence this is what he's given for you to submit to, then it would seem that we would find that as well, right? And we do. Hebrews 13, 17. Obey your leaders and submit to them for they are keeping watch over your soul as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning for that would be of no advantage to you. Submit to them. Trust God's providence. There is a great irony when you have a couple who says on the one hand, we believe that God has called us to be together. And on the other hand, do not want to submit to their family, to the civil magistrate, or to the church. So you believe that the way you find God's providence is by ignoring God's providence. Providentially, He's given you your family. They say, uh-uh. Providentially, he's giving you the church. They say, ah, bad idea. Providentially, he's giving you the civil government. And now you guys are like, well, who needs a piece of paper? You're running from all of the providential institutions that God has given to help you, to govern you, to guide you. And your reasoning for it is you have a greater providence It's somewhere around in here. And it supersedes all the others. That's problematic in a number of ways. It's problematic in the most obvious way, right? We're not paying attention to God's providence, but it's problematic in another way. What are you establishing? Well, we're establishing establishing a family. Oh, how's your family going to operate? Well, you know, we're Christians, so our family is going to operate according to the scriptures. Oh, So you guys are going to want to raise children and hold them to Ephesians 6, 1 through 4 after establishing your marriage by violating Ephesians 6, 1 through 4? I'm just trying to see if I understand this. You're gonna violate the text that is then going to be the foundation upon which you build the relationship that you violated the text. Do we see this? What is the husband in that relationship going to do? when they have a disagreement. It's amazing. What he's going to do is he's going to say, wife, you should submit to me. Why? Because the principle upon which your relationship is built is the principle that says, if the feelings are strong enough, the places where the Bible demands that you submit don't matter. And then what is she going to do? He's abusive. He's abusive. So what are you going to do? What are you going to do? He's abusive. You're going to go to your family? Who meant nothing to you when you wanted to pursue this man? Oh, you're going to go to the church to discipline him after you wouldn't listen to the church. You're going to go to the civil magistrate to try to bring the law down against him when you said, who needs a piece of paper? You hypocrite. Do you see this? Do you see how utterly ridiculous this is? God's providence means nothing to me when it stands in the way of what I want, but it means everything to me when I can use it to my advantage. There is this final providence. We see that Here it is, God. We see God's protection and providence in the family. We see his protection and his providence in civil society. We see his protection and his providence through the community of the godly and for us, the church. But we also see his protection and his providence through the Redeemer. Who's Boaz a picture of? We even call him by the title. He's the Redeemer. The Redeemer. The Redeemer. It's amazing. We can see it now, but we couldn't see it before. Here's what Providence allows us to do. Providence allows us to go back in the story. Providence allows us to go back to chapter one. And Providence allows us to see Naomi, Abimelech, Elimelech, and Malon, Kilion. And they're saying, this is the period of the judges. Horrible time in Israel's history. And we can look at them and we can say, hold on. There's a Redeemer coming. And then all the men die. And Naomi and Ruth and even Orpah, they're there and they're weeping. And here we are, we're reading the story and we just want to jump into the story and put our arms around them while they weep and say, don't cry, a Redeemer is coming. And then they have to split up. And Orpah goes and the three of them, the trio is broken up. And now all of a sudden Ruth is leaving her homeland. She's going to a place that she does not know. She's going to a place not only that she does not know, but remember, she is a Moabite woman. They're despised in Israel. If you haven't been here, then let me remind you who the Moabites are. The Moabites are the offspring of Lot. through his daughter who got him drunk and committed incest with him. That's who the Moabites are. So Ruth is not just leaving her homeland. She's going to a place where people like her are looked down upon and despised. And she must be terrified. And they both must be wondering what is going to become of us. And we just want to jump into the story and say, hold on, a redeemer is coming. How are we even gonna eat? And Ruth is walking to a field. Whose field? She doesn't know. How will she be greeted there? How will she be treated there? What will she find there? Do you see her walking? And don't you want to just walk beside her and hold her hand and say, hold on, a redeemer is coming. And here in chapter three, she has no idea what to do. Can you imagine? Okay. Okay. I'm supposed to go. I'm supposed to wait. that he's going to eat and drink and he's going to lay down and then he's going to do this no wait no then the cover and then my cloak and then let's just feet and then late but what if he doesn't ah girl hold on a Redeemer is coming a Redeemer is coming You know what's amazing? That's what we would do with Ruth if we could just go back into her story. But that's also what Ruth would do with you if she could speak to you from glory. You who think you're never gonna get married, hold on. There is a Redeemer. your Redeemer, your Bridegroom is coming. For you who's experiencing the pain of marriage right now, hold on, there is a Redeemer and your Redeemer is coming, your redemption is at hand. Have you made horrible choices? Your redemption is on its way. Your redemption is on its way. Because as great a Redeemer as Boaz is, he is nothing compared to your Redeemer. Lay yourself at his feet. Entrust yourself to him. By His providence, He will turn your pain into passion. He will redeem you. He will redeem you. So what do we do with this? If you are on this side, where you are contemplating marriage and you are walking toward marriage, trust in God's providence. Don't trust your heart. Trust in God's providence. Trust in the providential institutions that he has placed around you. Don't you dare try to do this by yourself. Trust in God's providence. If you are in one of these institutional places, don't you dare wash your hands of people who need you. Trust in God's providence. Walk with your children. Trust in God's providence. Walk with young Christians who don't have families to walk with them. Trust in God's providence. Trust Him. And when you see that by his providence he turns pain into passion. Then rejoice. Rejoice in God's providence. In every little picture of it. And every little instance and every little example, every time you get a glimpse of the hand of providence, rejoice, rejoice in the goodness of God, because guess what? You are going to be in the valley of the shadow of death again. And rejoicing in God's providence when you see it, will help you to trust in God's providence later when you don't see it. Amen.