Luke chapter 24, verse 15, familiar verse, Joshua said, and if it seem evil unto you to serve the Lord, choose you this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your father served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites in whose lands you dwell, but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord, amen. Thank you, you may be seated. And I do think you know with Joshua that was not just a statement to stir people, but Joshua meant it with all his heart, because that's how Joshua had been living his life, was serving the Lord. It's unfortunate how many of these people said, yeah Joshua, we will serve the Lord, and Joshua said you can't. They said, we're going to do it anyhow. Amen. We are going to serve the Lord, but it's unfortunate how long it didn't last. Amen. He thinks you wonder how much was not really in their hearts. And so with that as the foundation with Joshua and his home saying, we're going to serve the Lord. We tried as beginning last Wednesday night, actually preaching on the destruction of the home. and how that in our society, we're seeing it more and more prevalent, how the home is being absolutely destroyed from the inside out. It's like it's being eaten alive, amen. Something is eroding it. You'll find about the foundation of the homes being destroyed. Home today, as you look at it, is not like the homes of yesteryear. Things have changed dramatically, and I'll get to some of that tonight, but I was thinking about this afternoon When I was a kid, how many times it would be, you're outside until mama calls you inside. Amen, it was go outside and find something to do, I'm gonna find you something to do. It's amazing what you can find to do under those guidelines. Amen. But I remember as a kid, it was you had to wait for the whistle or the certain call to know it was time to come home, and you better come right then. That's the way it was with our growing up. I'm on Saturday, same thing, get up, and back in my day, and two cartoons came on Saturday morning, and when they were over, you were done. You had nothing, so you may as well go outside and play. And we played out all day long. Get out of school, we played till dark. It was just constantly outside playing and playing and playing. Nowadays, you almost gotta detonate them outside. Amen, after the years of watch, it's amazing to drive through neighborhoods and not see any children. Now, you know children are there, but they're not outside. They're concealing themselves inside of a house, not a home, amen. Things have changed and the home is being decimated and destroyed tonight and it's unfortunate we're seeing the same kind of destruction happening inside the walls of the church house, amen. I wonder how many homes tonight across our country that church is going on and the family's not even together in the house of God. Amen, how many families have already gone down that road, the beginning path of destruction in the home? We mentioned a couple things about that. We talked about the conflict in the home and how there's no authority in the home. We talked about the confusion in the home, the division that's there, the divorce causing all kind of problems in the house. the single parent family homes, how much problem that is, how much confusion that is. You got mama trying to be mama and dad, dad trying to be dad and mama, and it doesn't work, amen. They got a house, but not much of a home. And a lot of children tonight are growing up in a sad environment. I tell you what's astonishing is when you read statistics of how many kids going to this school in Jacksonville, Florida are homeless. You'd be shocked. at how many kids are going to public school and they don't even have a house, never mind a home. It's a plague in our country. Amen, it's a plague. And now someone's dropping the ball, because this is gonna play out in the next few years with this generation coming up, when they have a dysfunctional family unit, amen. And so with the home being destroyed, we mentioned those two things. I wanna jump right into the third one tonight, and I'm gonna give you the thought, then I'm gonna explain to you what I mean. But what is destroying the home? The destruction of the home, what is destroying it? Well, there's conflict, there's confusion, and there's Christ. Well, there is no Christ. Tell you what's destroying our home tonight is homes without Christ. Amen. He is the foundation, and we know he talked about if you'll take his words and you'll abide by them and live them, you'll be compared to a wise man who built his house upon a rock. We understand the foolish man does not do so, build a house upon the sand. The reason why homes so easily crumble, they don't have a proper foundation. Amen, it doesn't take much for it to start breaking apart. When you find out with people and you ask, if you were to ask them, okay, you were married X number of years, you got divorced, what was it that brought you to that place of deciding to divorce that one you said you loved? When you start hearing the reasons, you realize you didn't give it much of a go. You didn't try very hard. You got your feelings hurt. They weren't doing everything you wanted them to do. Well, we just realized we're not compatible. Well, you seemed compatible when you walked the wedding aisle. You seemed compatible that first year of the honeymoon bliss. You seemed compatible everything you did. Now you're not compatible, you're not working it out. Amen, it all comes down to somebody's not willing to work it out. Amen, and the problem is they don't have a foundation. Amen, you got two people standing on sinking sand. Won't be long, there'll be a fissure and a crack. And by the way, I've seen couples married 60 years in misery. Oh, but you have that couple, they're not even saying they would have married 55 years, yeah, but they're not happy. They're enduring each other. They're tolerating each other. How can you tell? Well, get them together and watch how they act with each other. When the one, the woman dominating and domineering the husband, that's not a good relationship. When they can't talk to each other, that's not a good relationship. I've watched people put on the dog in front of people. I've watched them come in the church house and the man put his arm around his wife. but you don't see the chokehold that went on during the service. Wasn't all affection. Part of it's control, part of it's manipulation, part of it's display. I want everyone to think, just play along. Act like you love me. Amen. Couples that wouldn't get within. When I was in college, they had a six inch rule, okay? You had to stay six inches apart. We wanted to get married because we're sick of being apart. Amen. So, amen. So anyhow, but I've watched couples that now, nevermind the six inch rule, they keep the six foot rule. Act like they're living under the COVID restrictions all the time. Huh? Amen. So afraid they're gonna catch what that spouse has, but yet when they come in the church, they hold hands and la la la la la. It's like, wait a minute, you haven't held hands all week. That's why you couldn't find the hand. Like a blind man groping in the darkness. You're not, you weren't used to it. You're not familiar, but you come into church, want everyone to think we are the happy, perfect family. And everyone's thinking, well, they look happy. No, they were smiling. They held hands, but they're not happy. You can see in their eyes. You can see in how they behave outside of church. When you bump into them at another location. Amen, you know what I'm talking about, amen. So this whole environment, Jesus said this. He said, think not that I've come to send peace on the earth. I came not to send peace, but a sword. He came to send man variance. Amen, a man against his father and on he goes. He said that a man's foes are they of his own household. He said, if any man love father and mother more than me, he's not worthy of me. If you love son or daughter more than me, you're not worthy of me. And so you find in that home environment, you've got a home being built as a home, but there's no Christ. He's not their savior. Amen, amen, it's a sad thing to think about. I say this tonight, that if Christ does not rule your heart, he will not rule your home either. He's gotta have you, amen. And too many houses in our country, yea, too many houses in our churches, are homes being built with no savior. Amen, now if you have one person saved, and one person lost, you have unequal footing. Okay, the nature of a goat is to what? Butt. Push. Seek their will and their way, right? Okay, even them little tiny things, right? You get them, you have an hour, what are they doing? Sandhill, boom! Right? I'm on top and they act all, and they push them off, I'm on top, that is a goat. They're always pushing for dominance. Okay, pushing for their way. You put them in a fenced in area and they'll stick their head out, that little four inch little piece of, point to the other side and then get their head stuck. Why? Because I want to decide where I eat, I want to decide where I go. You're not restricting me, you're not binding me, I am Billy Goat and I can do as I please. Okay, that's a goat, that's a person that's not saved. Take a goat with a goat, what are you gonna have? Right? Well, I think this, but I think this, but I think this, but I think this, constant, constant conflict. The nature of a sheep, the natural nature of a sheep is docile, submissive. I don't want confrontation. You can take the hill. I don't wanna hurt your feelings. We're not talking about sheep with old nature. We're talking sheep with divine nature, okay? A sheep with a divine nature will prefer others, yield to others. So you've got a home saved and lost, but, but, but, but, but, and the saved person's gonna constantly yield, yield, yield, yield, yield. by nature. Right? That sheep's gonna have to make themselves stand on principle and say, no. I'm gonna live the life according to what God put in me. I'm a child of God. And I'm gonna live by God's word and God's principle, but no. I'm gonna live as God leads me, but no. I'm gonna live because that goat will constantly but, but, but, but, but, push, push, push, push, push. Provoke, provoke, provoke, provoke. Amen, when it comes down and you got a saves and a loss, who's gonna yield? By nature, it's gonna be that sheep. By principle, uh-uh. Amen. And too many, man or wife, either one, if they're saved, married to a lost person, has to really fight yielding all the time and realize, no, by principle, I need to stand. And they won't do what God wants them to do because they're constantly being butted. Constantly trying to be pushed in a different direction. Always have a counter to what you're doing. Well, I believe God wants them to do this, Bye buddy, love you. Amen. Always trying to move things in a different direction. They really don't care, but for a sheep, it's hard enough sometimes to say, no, I'm going this way. This is what I'm gonna do, this is the way God wants me to be. And that goat is, but, but, but, but. And that sheep is like, oh, oh, no, oh, no, no! I'm not yielding, I'm not giving in, this is not a matter of opinion, it's not a matter of my idea and your idea, this is thus saith the Lord, and I'm following my shepherd. You can expect a goat is gonna do what a goat does. But, right? So you got a home, saved, lost. What's the problem? No savior. That's the problem. No savior. You have no equal ground. Let me ask you something. What is the sheep going to agree with the goat about? The grass is green. Okay, we can agree on that. The sun is shining. Yeah, but there's a cloud. Okay, so it's partly cloudy. If you've dealt with goats enough, you know that's what happens. Okay, I'll give you that. Okay, there is a cloud, so it's partly cloudy. Okay, that's not what I said. Okay, we can agree there's a cloud in the sky. Can we agree on that? Yeah, there's a cloud in the sky, yes. But now they're gonna agree what kind of cloud it is. Okay, but there's certain things you could find an agreement on. That's yellow. Yes, that's yellow. No, that's orange. Always a contradiction. Always a cause of disagreement and contention. Always trying to cause an argument. Always trying to beat you down. You know what they're trying to do? Make you submit. Trying to make you submit to their will. That's what goats do. Goats, they've got to be the king of the hill, or the queen of the hill, or whatever they are. They wanna be on the top of the hill and have everyone below them looking to them for guidance and leadership. Amen. But God wants the sheep to follow him. Amen, but when you have a home where you have no savior in one or no savior in either one of them, it's a disaster in the making. Amen. I don't care how much they tell you about their family, their home. Their home is a disaster without Christ. Because really, what are you living for? What is the purpose? What's gonna be the end result? So you find without a savior, there's no solid foundation, just as oil and water do not mix. If you don't believe me, you can try it. I don't care if you put oil in first or water in first. Either way, one's gonna sink to the bottom, one's gonna rise to the top. They don't mix, you can't stir them together. It's not gonna happen. And when you take saved and lost, I don't care what you try to throw in the mix, they're not gonna blend. There will always be a diffusion, there'll always be some kind of conflict and problem when you try to put a saved person with a lost person. You can't put Christ with Belial. It doesn't work, okay? We find people that have a religion, but no relationship. They have self-righteousness, but no redemption. So you find homes without Christ in the fact there's no savior. You'll find even among professing Christians, you will find in their home a lot of times there's no sovereign. They have a Christ, but they won't let him be Lord. Oh, they say they gave their heart to Christ. They say they're saved, said he's their Lord, but they don't look to him for guidance. They don't let him direct their paths. Their life is not based on scripture. It's based on feeling. It's based on emotion. It's based on what mama said or what daddy said or what the newspaper said or the commercial said. It's based on, they don't have a basis in Christ to live their life by. And so many times in homes, even among people that profess to be saved, they're not living a life according to the principles of God's word. They don't even read the word of God. You really think that people say preacher that way? Oh, I know there are. Amen, their life is unprincipled. There's no guiding to their life. They're just floating along, going through life, letting life dictate their direction. Amen, and so we find many people tonight, their homes are being destroyed. If you don't have God, not just the foundation, but as the Lord leading that home, guiding that home, That's why he told them to have a copy of God's word, read it, put it in your house, put it before your eyes to remind you and remind your children, thus saith the Lord. Daddy, what are these stones for? Well, let me tell you. Well, daddy, what is it? Well, let me tell you what that's for. Let me tell you why we have God's word and what God, this is how we're supposed to live our life. Amen, when we fail to teach and train in the word of God, guess what's gonna happen? That's what they'll reproduce. Amen, so the sovereign is missing. God does not rule over them. In fact, for far too many people, Christ is only consulted for pressing situations, but not thought of at any other time. Amen, it's a shame how many professing Christians treat their Christian life like a natural person does their physical birth. When you look back at the time you were born, do you constantly think about that? by the day you were born. And about mama and what she, no, you're just living your life. You're not thinking about the day I was born and came out of the womb. And many people get born again in a brand new world, brand new life, and give no thought to the new life they got. They're just going through the motions like any other person. Oh, they may go to church, might carry a Bible, but they're not gonna live by the Bible. God is not the sovereign ruler in their life. He's not the one that they, they're not trustable with all their heart. And when you have a home with no savior, it's gonna be destroyed. A home with no sovereign, it's gonna be destroyed. A home where the Lord is not the source is gonna be destroyed. Amen. Why we shouldn't have to, as a whole, why do so many Christians have to be taught to trust the Lord? Preach to about trust the Lord, honor the Lord, let him be your provider. Don't trust in yourself. Trust in the Lord with all thine heart. Lean not to thine own. Oh yes, I forgot that idea. We should never have to be reminded if he would be our continual source. Amen. Anytime something happens, he should never be second, third, or fourth option. First option. Amen. If you're running low in provision, it's God not us. Amen, too easy, well, I'll just work around, yeah, I know, we have the capability, we'll figure it out. But God should be the source, he should be the one we understand. Anything I have, came from God. Anything I can get, comes from God. Anything I am, comes from God. Everything, he's our source, our provision, our provider. Amen, we should be looking to him continually. Christ is not all they need. Because for most of their life, they don't need him at all. Amen. Now, we've heard it said, and you might have thought it yourself, but it's true. God can bring you to a place where you need him, and you realize it. Okay? But I don't wanna be in that place where God's gonna break my back, break my legs, and throw me down on the floor for me to say, oh God, could you help me? Honestly, there is nothing in my life that I don't need God's help with. Amen, amen. The days we follow the world's philosophy of I got this, no, you're heading for trouble. You ain't got nothing. You're not that intelligent, you're not that none of us are. Well, I'll just figure it out. No, you're gonna make a mess, amen. Let God be your source, your provider, your counselor, amen, your help, your stay, your strength, everything you need. Christ is all you need. He really is. That's nice to have a friend, but I'd rather have the friend. It's nice if someone gives, but I'd rather have him give to me, because he can have them give to me. But if I'm depending on you or them, or him or her, I'm gonna be very, God said don't put confidence in princes. They're gonna disappoint you. Man's gonna let you down. That one that you have complete, they'll always be there. They will always be there. Oh, what do I do? Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring. Sorry, the one you were trying to reach, What do I do? Well, now you're in a pickle. Because you've been neglecting your source all along. And now you don't even know what to say to him. How do I approach him? It's been so long since I've spoke to him. Amen. I mean, years ago, I heard Brother Raines say this statement. I've shared it before, but he's talking about it with prayer. He said there's two reasons why people don't pray. Right? It's either you don't know God, or you don't need them. That's why people don't pray. Well, when God's not the source, it's the same thing. Either you don't know God or you don't need him. Amen. It's so easy, isn't it? Just open the refrigerator. Open the cabinet. That's easy, isn't it? Just go to the freezer. But let the freezer go out. Let the refrigerator go out. let the food in the cabinet spoil, and everything you have power to do fails you, where are you gonna turn? I'm glad that'll never, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. You be careful what you say will never happen to you. I've been through many rest areas called never be there. I'll never be there. That'll never happen to me. That doesn't happen to a child of God, said Bildad and Zophar. God's ways are beyond our ways, and God knows how to get us to realize, God, you're my source, and I want you to be my source. Amen, I'd rather give God praise than myself. My, look at what I've done, said Nebuchadnezzar. Amen. Oh, Lord, help us. We wanna make sure that we have the right heart towards Christ. So home tonight is dealing with destruction because home either has no Christ at all or he's not in his right place. The next point I wanna address, I'm not gonna belabor the point because we've been dealing with it a lot here lately, is this matter of communication. Amen, maybe I do need to belabor it, I don't know. But I wanna belabor the point tonight. We've been saying a lot about communication. So let me deal with two primary things tonight. Okay, when you're dealing with a home, the home is being destroyed inwardly because of the communication aspect. And there's a lack of communication, two things. Number one is devices. And you notice in that word devices is the word vice, right? When I think of device, I think of division. Okay? Now, you don't have to have all that we have for this problem. It's been going on for years and years and years. It doesn't take much of a device to keep people from communicating with each other. Okay? You've all seen it. First time I saw it, I was just overwhelmed looking at it, when the family's all at the table at the restaurant, and they get the phones out, and they're texting each other. I want the steak medium well. Seriously? Or they were just talking with who knows who all else. They're at the dinner table together, having a meal together, but they're not even talking to each other. You know why? They're on a device. And nowadays, it's kind of different back to the other day, but the same type of thing, is you got anything with a screen on it, amen, whether it's a computer, a tablet, a phone, iPad, the television, the movie theater screen, Anything that's a device that draws your attention away from someone you could be talking to. So device is that which is talking to you. That's keeping you from talking to somebody else. Okay, so we think about the television, the phone, computer, tablets, on and on, everything that's so easily a distraction. Okay, I read a statistic the other day, and I know some of these are even worse than this one, but I read the other day that children, and talking about elementary age children, spend an average of around seven hours per day on screen devices. and less than seven minutes a day outside with unsupervised activity, or unregulated activity. So in other words, it's not counting at school when they took them out for recess. Go outside and run around at recess. Time when they're just outside playing is seven minutes a day. Seven hours on a device. Okay? A lot of schools now, when the child goes to school, they're handed a laptop. or tablet or some other device. They're always looking at a device. Always looking at something. I've been amazed at kids. Okay, stories nowadays came out the other day of some person was texting an 11-year-old child inappropriate things. And my first thought is, what's an 11-year-old kid doing with a phone? But our country hadn't caught on to that yet. Yes, that person's a pervert. But why does that 11-year-old kid have a phone? Really? You understand these children are getting preyed on, they're getting preyed on through their phones towards starting. So that device is becoming very destructive. Because how do you as a parent help your child who's just been abused in unbelievable ways through a device you gave them? Hard to deal with, wouldn't it? Amen. So these devices have come in, and I thought about this this evening before church, that with this devices we're dealing with, we are more likely to pause you than we are the device. Thereby signaling to that person, this is more important than you are right now. That's exactly what you're saying. Picture's worth a thousand words. You just told them, wait a second, you're not as important. And I'm not talking about you and being rude and interrupting, I'm talking about that. I'm talking about us letting a device become divisive. Amen. We all may just bob our head and say, help me Jesus. Right? Right? I'm as guilty as the rest and pray God help me. Hold on one second, I'm working on this text. Let me get this finished up. Let me ask you something. What would happen to that text if you paused? Nothing. Does that phone go, hey! You are so rude! No, that phone's just gonna sit there where you paused it. Right? And you can go back there the next day and there it sits. Right? I never finished typing that text. And there it is just waiting as patiently as if it had good sense. Right? But we take our loved one we're supposed to be communicating with, and they're trying to communicate something to us. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Oh, we don't even hear him. Walk you out. I gotta get this done here. What is so important about that? Whom are you sending a message to that's more important than the one trying to talk to you? Nobody. Nobody. But that's the image I'm portraying, is that this moment, this person, this thing, this whatever, is more important than you are right now. Hold on, wait, wait, wait, wait. I'm right in the middle of trying to figure this out. 22 plus 72. Wait a minute, wait, wait, wait. Wait a minute, I promise you, if you lay it down and take care of it, when you come back, you'll still have 22 plus 72 sitting there. Just waiting on you. Amen. Let's all nod our heads together. Amen? The devices. I remember growing up, and it was like, shh, shh, shh, shh, this is the good part. And then they start telling you the whole thing. And you realize, wait a minute, you've watched this how many times, and you tell me to hush? Yes, because that device is speaking. It's a good thing that device isn't that important to us. Right? Pause. Okay. Pause. Play. Pause. Play. Ha, ha. Red light, green light. Ha, ha. Simon says. Ha, ha. You missed it. Right? Why not, could you hold one second, please? Can I call you back in just a minute? We're not talking about someone being rude, we're just talking about somebody who's trying to communicate with you. You know the difference. When they're being rude, you're being rude, stop it. Well, they're just trying to communicate with you, but you're already communicating with someone else who's not them, And unless it's your spouse, all others can be paused while I deal with the more important person. But we're not thinking that, are we? And that device has now taken over our communications. People tend to give precedence to the device. It's sad to say, but people are more dedicated and concerned. Listen to me. More dedicated and concerned with the content and the condition of their device. I've noticed when I do this, it's not keeping up like it used to. Seem like the battery's dying more rapidly. Volume wasn't quite like it used to. Seem like it's a little, I don't know why my volume's down on my phone. Let me check this, let me do this. Seems like it's dry. I might even need to reset some things and turn my phone off, turn it back on. We're so concerned about the condition. Ooh, email. Even if it's, oh, an email. It got your attention. Let me get this off my phone. I'm concerned with the content. Ooh, my phone feels hot. It's all about the device. Let that high dollar television set start going. I gotta get that fixed. And you got a child who's clamoring for attention, not realizing they need to be fixed. They need some help. They need some attention. We got a little while, okay? We are more prone to be concerned with upgrading a device they are improving our spouse or our children. We want to make sure this is functioning at optimal, but not concerned about their functioning. Why? It's a lack of communication. Because we're not communicating, we don't realize the lack, what they need. Amen. Amen. What the family needs is more attention. Amen. Quantity time and quality time. Oh, I'm home so many hours a day, but you're not there. That's not quality. Amen. Oh, help me Lord. All right. If that was a job, you'd be the unemployment line. If you gave that kind of quality on the job, that would give it the house. Yearly review at work, cha-ching, ka-bing. At the house, ka-boom. Amen. Communication is so vitally important for that home to keep it from being destroyed. I wonder how many days have been lost due to being entertained by a device. Amen. A child coming up, we had a television. Wish to God we never did, but we did. But anyways, when I was coming up, I was actually, I had already gone to college, right before I went to college is when they first got cable, or at least our family first got cable. So I never had to deal with cable growing up. Thank you, Lord of heaven. Amen. But some folks did. But the television was such a monster. The reason why they called it a one-eyed monster, it was seeking the destruction of the family. And I can remember, because there was two boys and two girls, and then a mom and a dad, and everyone had their likes and dislikes. We didn't have TVs in our bedrooms. There was a family television, and that was it. And so there had to be some things set out, but who got to say who watched what? There's only one remote control. And I knew better than trying to beat my sister up every night, okay? I'm not getting in trouble doing that. But we had it set up somehow where you could choose this night and this one chooses that night. Well, the night before I had chosen the ball game. Well, the next night, I mean, it's not like I could have gone and read a book but had no interest. go play a game, that's kinda boring. So I'd rather lay on the floor in the living room and watch something I don't wanna watch than live a life. So it came time, it was my sister's choice, and it happened to be whatever night it was, probably Monday night or whatever night it was, and she said, I'm gonna watch, and I'm like, no! Yes, it's what I wanna, I don't think she wanted to watch, I think she's trying to torment me. I hate this, I hate this show. That's where it all stemmed from me calling it Fairy on the Prairie. I could not stand that show. Little House on the Prairie. I don't care about your prairie. I don't care about your life. I don't care about your parents. I don't care about your dog. I don't care about your animals. Oh! Oh! But I would lay there and endure it, but I fussed about it the whole time, because I wanted to watch something else. Now by the way, I was saved. Didn't have a clue about being any better than that. It was my time, guess what we watched? Sports. So my sister went to her room. I mean, I lay there and complained. Yeah. But I remember just the little bit of the childhood of the TV being such a controlling aspect. And if the family came together to watch something, we all had to be in our place and be still, don't keep getting up and down. We had a couch back here and one chair for six people. Okay? So typically I'm laid out on the floor, laying on my arm, and from the other side, and laying on my back, watching this television program, whatever it is, and that would be there, and it's like, if you had to get up, wait for a commercial. Because if I got up, I'd be blocking the screen. No, don't do that. Don't do that. Hey, get, get, get, get, get. Oh, thanks a lot. You didn't miss anything, okay? But that device was demanding attention. And oh boy, if that thing ever went out. Family's gonna fall apart, what are we gonna do? We are in trouble, we need counseling, something's gonna happen. But I just remember the stupid memories of that thing being so demanding of your attention. And that was before cable, satellite, movies, videos, cell phones, computers, laptops, It's a constant bombardment that's pulling people away from talking. Amen. One of the best memories I have is with my mother. When we'd finish eating the supper meal, my mom would sit at the table and I'd sit there with her and we'd talk. We didn't get up and rush off. We actually sat and just talked. About what? Everything, anything, we just talked. We became conversant. That's missing in families, is talking to each other. Amen. You can tell me what the phone said today. It's amazing how many friends we got on the phone. Well, they sent me an email. I don't even know who you are, okay? Don't get too enthralled with all that. I got another unknown caller. And I don't know who this guy, this guy calls me about every day, spam, I don't know who he is, but he calls me all the time. And we're more concerned about the device than we are the family member. Amen, so we find that the media's getting involved, these devices are getting involved, and then we've lost the aspect of dialogue. People no longer know how to carry on a conversation. Amen. Okay. What do you do? Okay, what do you do whenever there's a lull in the conversation? Oh, I guess they're done. I guess that conversation's over. I guess I need to speak grammatically. Duh-duh-duh, comma. That means there's more to come. Duh-duh-duh, semicolon, hold on, the thought's not finished yet. Duh-duh-duh, parentheses. I'm gonna share something. It's gonna tie in with what I already said, but give me a minute to formulate the thought, and they're gone. Not always this way. They're gone, they walked off. And all you divas go. Okay, well I guess I'm the only one that wants to converse around here. So let me just say what I was gonna say to you. I'll just say, because I wanna say it. And you wonder why they're talking to themselves. because they're wanting to talk to you, but you walked away like a thief in the night. No one's ever done that, of course. But you gotta watch yourself. Remember, this communication's important, which means you have to figure yourself out. Sunday school, don't nag, right? We don't need to be nagged every time we're not communicating properly. We need to do it to ourselves. I'm gonna pay attention to my communication. Am I listening? Am I catching what she's saying? Can I repeat back what she said? Let me ask you something. How many times has a child disobeyed because they didn't hear what you said? Well, they heard it, but they didn't hear it. It's like Moses didn't hear Speak. He just heard rock, rod. That's all he heard. Rebel. Rod, rock, rebel. Pow! Right? And so sometimes it should, you have to actually tell that child, now tell me what I just told you. When you find the pattern developing that they're not doing what I told them, and they're like, well, you didn't tell me. He's like, now you're calling me a liar. I told you and you didn't listen. I was listening, you didn't say anything about that. Okay, you're not paying attention. So don't get upset when they say, would you repeat back to me what I just told you? You said something trash. Yes, I did say something trash. What did I say about trash? I don't know. Okay, we're gonna have a little problem when you start acting out trash, not knowing what I said about the trash. What I told you was, when you change the trash, the main trash can is full. Don't leave it on the ground. All you heard was trash. So what happened? Either the trash didn't get changed or you threw it on the ground. So I don't care how old you are. So tell me, what did I just say to you? Now this is not a good marital solution, okay? This is child rearing, okay? It's not gonna help your marriage by saying, now what did I just say? Okay? But the spouse should be of himself realizing, am I listening? Am I paying attention? Am I a good communicator? If not, why not? To communicate, you have to listen. But you also have to share thoughts. Remember in prayer, you want to pray and then linger and give God a chance to talk. How many times has God spoken to you? Because you let him talk. Sometimes great insight when someone talks. All good nothing to say, but you better think real fast. of something to say. Communication's vital. You may not think so, but that communication, lack thereof, can erode your family unit. Bring destruction. Oh, it's such a minor thing. It is not a minor issue. It's a major issue. Amen. That's right. And I know men have more of a problem than ladies do. I know that. So men, let's buckle up, pull up your boots, man up, and realize as a man, I need to have communication with my wife, which means I'm gonna listen to her to where I can repeat back what she said. I may not understand a lick of what I'm saying, but I should be able to tell her what she told me. Amen. And more than just, well, you said something about doing something somewhere and traffic was bad or something, I don't know. Yeah, whatever. No, it's not just whatever. Listening, paying attention, able to share back. If she shares something that morning with you, when you come home that night, you can say, honey, were you able to? I know you mentioned this morning you were a little stressed about this. Well, how'd that turn out? Ooh, I forgot. Hold on, I'm not even gonna look at you. So let me ask you something. How much praying did you do for her about that stressful thing? She was telling you for a reason, not to complain. So then we'd get upset when the wife said, oh, by the way, everything turned out fine. We're like. And then there's no siblings walking around to inquire of, oh, what did she mean by that? And now the prayers begin. Oh God, what was she talking about? Help me, Lord, this is, oh, I'm in, Lord, I'm in trouble if I don't know what in the world she's talking about. Oh, something was going on and she told me something somewhere about, oh, that was this morning, yeah, this morning. She told me, oh, but what was it? So how can I word this to where she can retell the story without me giving away that I have no idea what she's talking about? But the problem is mama's a mama and she knows what you're up to. Communication's important. We're not gonna belabor it, okay? We're just giving it to you. Devices and dialogue. Watch the devices, learn how to dialogue. Very, very, very important. Amen, very important. I wanna jump ahead. Okay, I shouldn't even tell you that. You wouldn't even know. All right, so we're gonna start with this point, okay? What's destroying the home? is that conflict, that confusion, no Christ, problems of communication, and then careers. It is destroying our homes. Let me preface it at the very beginning. Man marries woman. Man now becomes husband. She now becomes wife. That's their career. Now he may have a job, and hopefully he does have a job, provide for the said wife. but he is now a husband, she is now a wife, okay? Your primary concern now becomes the spouse, not the job. Amen. I think we've gotten things a little twisted, a little backwards to where now the career is more important to take care of the family than taking care of the family. I do believe we'll give an account for what kind of laborer we were, what kind of servant we were, what kind of worker we were, employee we were, but it's gonna give far greater judgment upon what kind of husband we were and what kind of father we were. Amen. The career, putting money, possession, things above family, the very unit we claim to be doing it all for. I'm just doing all this for my family. and people's careers are destroying the household. Amen? I've heard many preachers, teachers, wannabes, whatever, try to dissect Proverbs chapter 31 in such a way that's contrary to scripture. When you read about the Proverbs 31 virtuous woman, everything she did was to benefit her household, not herself. She wasn't the one talking about herself, okay? And when you read the story, she wasn't neglecting husband or children to do what she was doing. Amen. I'm not gonna delve into all that tonight, but amen. So the primary concern is the home, the family. Amen. Amen, Jesus. The wife is to be the guide and the keeper at home, right? Which means she's the keeper of the home. Can't do that when she's not home, right? Amen. I've known some families who have homeschooled. Well, I'm sorry they called it that. But actually it was van schooled. They were van schooled. Because mom was always on the go somewhere. And it wasn't always doing anything, she was just getting in the van to go. Didn't want to be home. So the kids, get your books, get in the van, we're going. Do your schoolwork. And now, we present to you the van graduate. It doesn't, anyways, help us, Lord. Let me just give this to you tonight. We're dealing with this aspect of careers interfering with home. Amen? You mentioned the other week about people you know that have their home, but they won't go in the house. They've gotta find something to do to avoid home. I don't understand that. I've never been that way. I wanted to go home. Times I had to work in the public, it's like, waiting for that announcement, you can go home, yes! I actually dreaded, okay, overtime, oh, I know overtime means more money, but it means more time away from my wife. Yep, that was my thinking. I'd rather be with my wife than them. You can't pay me enough to dwell among you. That was my thought, I had enough of you. We're not talking about provided, we're talking about, you just want more money, more things, more stuff. But it's never enough. It's never enough. And I've learned this much, you give me an inch, it's like the devil, give me an inch, It's never enough. Amen. A hard worker becomes a harder worker. Right? A dependable man becomes expended. Not expendable, expended. Stretched. Amen. The family unit is something you get one shot at. Amen. You know what's sad in our world is all your loyalty to the world means absolutely nothing at the end of the day. Now they will take it, and they'll use it, and they'll abuse it, but it means nothing to them at all. When they sit down and look at their bottom line, you're not there. When they start factoring things out about the company, they don't consult with you or consider you. You're a non-entity. I don't care how loyal you are, how dependable you are, how faithful you are. But let's put it back in the home, see how important you are. Nobody can replace mom or dad in the home. Nobody can. Amen. Too many times you've got children rising up and fulfilling the role of mom or dad because mom and dad, even though both parents live there, aren't there. Amen. I remember going to my childhood home and things had changed dramatically in that town. And I remember driving around and just looking at places that I thought I remembered And it's like, that's not, what happened there? And I'm not kidding you, it was place after place, tons of places. Used to have little three-bedroom ranch homes, now had two-story huge houses, three-car garage, a car in every garage, two more in the driveway, and no one's home. That was the extras that they had. Mom and dad were at work. Now I'm talking about, it was already getting dark, late at night. Drive by later, lights are on, nobody's home. Junior's making his own supper, trying to watch out, make sure kids get ready for bed, and mom and dad finally get home from work, providing for their family. That become commonplace. I drove, I don't know how many houses I saw that I thought they must be vacant. No, people lived there when they got home. but they spent so much time laboring in their career to take care of a family they spent no time with. Amen. Amen. Did you realize what children will do? They will allow you to replace yourself. It doesn't mean they like it. They'll take the trinkets and the treasures and be glad to do so. But it doesn't mean it replaces what they want in you. Amen. So here's what happens with careers. With careers, getting wrapped up in a career, and again, this is a man just being so driven or whatever in his mind and work and work and work and work. The woman, the same thing. She's got a family, but she's working. She's busy, she's engaged, bringing money in the home. He's bringing money in the home. And the number one responsibility is being neglected. And here's what happens. When that's taking place, you're gonna start developing covetousness. Because you have to stop and say, why am I doing so? Who's it for? What's the purpose behind it? Amen. It leads to covetousness. It can easily lead to competition. That's where you find society, where they got this, now I need to, so I better work more hours so I can, I gotta keep up with them. They can't have, why can't they? Have you ever noticed, you have noticed yourself, haven't you, at times? That old flesh rises up and that jealousy on the inside, and I want one of those. I'd like to be able to go buy one of those, and I want, but wait a minute, I don't want their life, though. Well, if I could have their stuff without their life, it's not gonna happen, okay? But that competition kicks in where now, well, if you, I can get one too, and I can do so too, and I can do this, and I can do this, and I can, and now we gotta figure out a way to do so. So now we take the family and say, pause while I do this to help the family. Know why you're helping yourself. Amen. Used to be drive-by yards, and there was a basketball goal, and a tricycle, and a bike, and a scooter, and a ball, and a, now it's an RV, and a boat, and another boat, and another boat, and a four-wheeler, and a this, and a that, and a that, and a that, and a that, and all for the family. All family, you are a lying, lying deceiver. Competition. Thought about this, what happens with these careers if you're not careful, it leads to a casualness concerning the home. Home becomes a secondary thing. It's supposed to be the primary thing, okay? If you're a woman, your primary objective is guiding that house to honor God, raising children that'll get saved, live for God, honor the Lord, and become the help meat for your husband. That should be the primary objective. Everything else gets paused. That does not. Amen. Then, if you're not careful, it results in a lack of contentment. You can't be content because there's so much out there to get. You got one family and one shot. One, only one. And you know what you're gonna find out, like I'm finding out? You cannot rewind the clock. Amen. I wish I could, you can't. I wish I could get that day back, you can't. Well, if I could do it all over, you can't. But you can start fresh and anew, make sure things are where they need to be right now. Amen, amen. Especially when you got children. I don't care if they're 21 or 62. It's your child. Amen, amen. No, no, don't try that. Be 62. Unless it's the will of the Lord, amen. Amen. That primary thing, we get one chance. And if we keep our focus where it needs to be, realizing if I don't get it right now, it's not gonna be right. Amen. Amen. You know, I sit back and I'm thinking all these things, you know, it's really not that difficult. Not at all, with the help of the Lord. So as a husband, my prayer needs to be, God, we were talking about this the other day, Lord, show me. Show me where I'm lacking. Show me where I can improve. Show me what you want me to be. Show me what my spouse needs me to be. The spouse is praying. You never guess, men, what the spouse is praying. God, please show him what I need. Lord, how do I tell my husband? Would you please tell him? He'll take it from you better than he would from me. The husband's over here praying, God, would you show me? Then when God shows what you want to do with it, Do it. Amen. It's kind of like that awkwardness when boy first meets girl. Hi, how are you? Hey. That shy, no? Why? Then you start getting to know each other and you're asking questions about each other, getting to know each other a little bit. Then the bashfulness eases off and you get to know each other better. Then you get married and you revert right back to it. And it's like you're afraid to say something. I got time. What you got to say? We got time for everything else. I mean everything else. We're gonna put restraints on the one we say we love the most? Amen. I'm trying to work on it more and more, but my wife, she's been very gracious and helpful. But to me, as soon as I pull back that sheet, lay my body down, good night. That's my plan. I told my wife, I said, honey, I go to bed to go to sleep. But the way things work with us, that's when she's finally able to decompress with everything, get everything done out of the way, and now she wants to talk. Go ahead, honey. I'm listening. No. Huh? So I'm having to work. I'm still working on that. Honestly, what's more important? Amen. There have been times she'll talk and I fall asleep. And I wake back up. She says, what did I say? And I said, I don't know. I heard the first part of what you said and then something happened, but I'm back. I'm back. I'm awake again. Now what were you saying? What was that? But you know, there's times I wanna talk. How hypocritical. I wanna talk right now. Well, I can't talk right now. Then they wanna talk. Can you see that, submit yourselves one to another? working with each other, because communication is so vital. Amen, amen. I don't know why I'm ever having to go to the extremes of getting her phone out. Record, dear husband. And just start sharing with me what she wanted to tell me when I had time to listen. And then forward me the recording. That's nonsense. She should be able to share anything with me anytime she wants to, without me having to pause her to take care of something else. Amen. Now, if you're like I am, if you pause me mid-thought, you're not getting it. Why not? Because I don't remember it. It was in the moment, it's in the flow, and if you pause me or detour me, it's gone. It's gone. Because now I'm thinking about what this is instead of that, and now tell me what you were gonna say. Forget it, it's gone. You don't remember? No, I don't. It was something that was very, very important. Life-changing. Now I'm scarred for life. That's okay, that's all right. Amen. So help me. I got to stop. So be careful. Yeah. You got to be careful with the pause buttons, the detours, the interjections. You know what I mean? Interjecting, interjecting your thought while they're trying to share their thought. Hey, Mom, how are you? Yeah, yeah. My day's been okay. I went down to... You call, ask me about my day, and I mention one thing, and I get a 30-minute story about your day. Why did you even ask me? Because there's an inroad to there wanting to share something with you. Don't do that to people. If they're sharing a thought, let them finish their thought, don't interject. Because what you're saying is my thought's more important. Have you thought about this? Help us, Lord, amen. Back in communication, very important, amen. Keep it in the right place. You have to talk to each other. You have to talk to each other. Parents, talk to children. Children talk to parents, not talk back to parents. Amen. But children should be able to talk to their parents about anything. Should be open channel. Amen. All right. So we've realized tonight the home is being destroyed because Christ is either not the savior or he's not the sovereign and the source. We could look back and deal with this communication thing a little further. Amen? The career aspect. We've got a couple more we'll deal with another time or we'll just give it out as some little devotion somewhere. Amen? Whatever. Amen. But let's not be a statistic of a home being destroyed either because we wouldn't heed or didn't want to take the time to work on what is so simple. Can you imagine a house, a house, falling apart. I mean, just because we wouldn't fix one little $3 part. Maybe that's all that is $3 parts right there. Very simple. Make sure Christ, if you're saved, save your parts all set. What about the sovereign part? The source part? Amen. That communication. Amen, amen. I hope you young people would understand something. There's not an adult in this building right now that doesn't have a problem with communication. Preach, I have no problem talking. That doesn't mean you're communicating. That just means you're talking. But are you actually communicating thoughts? And are you listening? And are you talking to the right person? But that's something you're gonna have to deal with the rest of your life. And again, it's not a personality. I've heard, oh, I'm just not that way, or I'm the man, I got stuff to do. Your family needs you. Amen. Amen. Amen. My wife knows there's some times she can tell with me that I don't feel like talking. And it's not because I don't wanna talk to her, I'm just dealing with something that I don't wanna talk right now. But it doesn't mean she can't talk. Then there's times that I can talk to her, but I can tell she doesn't wanna really get into it and share things back, so I can just share my thought. Then I realize sometimes this ain't the time for this conversation. We'll talk about this later. when we've had a chance. Because here's what I'll do being a preacher, okay? There've been times that during the night I got a thought, and I've been thinking about it, I wrote some stuff down, get up in the morning, and I hear her, she's stirring. Hey, guess what? Did you know that in the Bible, da, da, da, da, da, da, da? And she's like, honey, I'm not even awake yet. I love you, I love the word of God, but I have no idea what you're talking about. Give me a few minutes to get myself together. Amen. Oh, simple, simple, simple. God help us. All right, let's stand together. Amen, may the Lord help us tonight. Very important to keep that home right.