Turn in your Bibles tonight, if you would, to Proverbs chapter number 18. Proverbs chapter number 18. Now that I've got all you ladies here tonight, I'm going to preach on treasuring your husband. You say, preacher, what brought about the change? My wife told me she was going to take notes for me. Proverbs chapter 18 tonight in verse number 22. So often, as in ministry, I hear people say, Preacher, I want to do the will of God for my life. I want to be the kind of person that God wants me to be. That ought to be the heart's desire of every child of God. It doesn't matter whether you've been saved 5 weeks, 5 years, 50 years. It doesn't matter whether you're 5, 15, 25, 55, or 85, or even 105. It ought to be your desire and my desire to be the person that God would have us to be, to live life God's way. Now, you know, just as whenever— as men, I know how we are, you know, whenever we buy something, you know, especially— How many men love when your wife buys something, furniture you have to put together? How many? Well, lift your hand. I think that's wicked. I just do. I always have parts left over. She says, what about the instructions? I said, honey, I'm a man, I don't need them. You know, you're trying to figure out how this stuff fits, you know, and you're taking it apart and putting it back together again. I told you if you look at the instructions, you'd know how to, you know. Anybody feel my pain? Amen? Yeah, okay. So anyway. Well, you know, we all need instruction. And as Christians, we need the instruction that comes from the Word of God. Do you realize tonight, sir, that you don't know how to be the right kind of husband? Do you understand that I don't know how to be the right kind of husband? I have to learn what God says so that I can be the right kind. The Bible says that I'm to trust in the Lord with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding. Too often I want to do things the way I understand it or what I think is right. God says that I'm going to acknowledge Him in all my ways and He'll direct my path. Well, how does God direct my path, preacher? He does it through His Word. And tonight, men, I want to share with you God's instruction for you, what your Heavenly Father says that you and I need to be as men in our homes, how to treasure our lives. Look, if you would, Proverbs chapter 18 and verse number 22. The Bible says, Whoso findeth a wife, findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord. Let's pray together. Father, we sure love you tonight, and I sure need your help. And Father, I don't pretend to even know all there is to know about being a husband, about being a father, about being a man. Lord, I know what the world tells me, but I also know what you say. And so often, Lord, as we make our way through life, we tend to allow society to impact us rather than being impacted and instructed by the Word of God. Lord, tonight as we look in the pages of your Word, I pray that we as men will learn something that will help us to treasure our wives and treasure our families and treasure those things that I believe are of utmost value that you bring into our life. Help us to be the kind of men, Lord, that you'd have us to be. Help us to be your man. And Lord, to lead our families your way. And we'll thank you and praise you for what you do for us. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen. You know, marriage is a sacred institution. The love relationship between a husband and wife is a beautiful picture of the love relationship between Christ and His church. Christ is the bridegroom and the church is His bride. And we model before an unsaved world, Basically, the relationship of a Christian to his Savior. Paul said to the Corinthians, I have espoused you as a chaste virgin to Christ. That means that you're betrothed to the Lord. I belong to Him, and He's the heavenly bridegroom, and I'm part of His bride. Marriage is a serious institution. God takes my marriage and your marriage seriously, and so should we. Amen? And we need to learn to be God's kind of husband and God's kind of man and do things God's way. Notice, if you would, the value that God places upon your wife. God said, Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing. God said that your wife is the best thing in all the world for you. You say, Preacher, you just don't understand. Yes, I do understand. The Bible said, that the day you got married that you obtained favor of the Lord, that He allowed a person to come into your life that would love you other than your mother. Some of you will get that a little bit later on. Listen, my grandmother, when she met my wife, she said, you better marry her. I always, whenever I had a potential girlfriend that would be a wife, I'd always take her to my grandmother's house, first of all, to taste her biscuits, and then second, so that she could meet my grandmother, my grandmother could check her out, and she met Lori, and she said, you better latch on to her, you better marry her, and so, boy, I tell you, I took grandma's advice and did it, and boy, it paid off, 22 years worth, and she even learned how to cook through my grandmother, but anyway, My grandmother had an impact on my mind and things of that nature, but I'm glad that there was someone that would love me, and I found a good thing, and I obtained favor of the Lord when I met my wife. And I believe that God is saying to us men that we need to value and treasure our wives. Now let me give you some basic ways that you need to do that. Turn in your Bibles, if you would, now to the New Testament, to Ephesians chapter number 5, and we're going to look at several portions of Scripture tonight. And I want you to notice, first of all, you can value and treasure your wife by leading her, by leading your wife. If you want to treasure her, then you need to lead her. Look, if you would, Ephesians chapter number 5, please, and verse number 23. Ephesians chapter number 5 and verse number 23, the Bible says, for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, and He is the Savior of the body. Just as the Lord is to lead in the relationship that I have with Him, and I'm to follow Him, so I am to be a leader in my relationship to my wife. Women are looking for a husband who will lead them. I believe that's important that you need to understand that this thing of headship or leadership is not a matter of superiority and inferiority. It doesn't mean that a husband is superior to his wife. It doesn't mean that at all. No, what it means is that God has placed you in the marriage relationship to take the lead. that God wants you to lead your wife and God wants you to be a servant leader. That's what the Bible, Jesus said, I'm among you as one who serves. And man, you lead your wife by serving your wife. By serving her. A servant leader. We find that there are several ways that a husband, I believe, is to lead. And men, may I say that as we think about this thing of leadership, that as we follow the Lord and we follow and learn to become God's kind of man and begin to lead in our home, that's exactly God's desire for us, is that men become leaders. If there's a problem in America today, it is that we have a feminized society. That men struggle at being men. One of the things that we want to strive to do in our church is we want our young men, and that's why by the time they turn the age of five in our church, they have a male role model all the way up. And you say, Preacher, why? Because men need to mentor men and teach them to lead. Amen? Listen, too many wives are having to lead their homes because husbands are passively sitting on the sideline and not taking a proactive role in their home to lead their family the way God intended them to do so. Let me just share with you some ways that you can do that. You can preside over your home. When you think about this word head, it has the idea of ruleth. 1 Timothy 3, 4 of the Bible says of a preacher that he's to be able to rule his own house well. Now that word rule doesn't have the idea of a dictatorship. It has the idea of a manager. The husband is to manage his home, to oversee, to get the most. You see, a manager on his job gets the most out of his employees. He makes them productive. Let me ask you a question, men. When you manage your home, what do you bring out of your wife and children? Do you bring the best out of her? Do you lead her in such a manner that she knows that you care about her and that you take her concerns in mind and you're interested in her life and what she's going through and where she's at and how she views things? You say, no preacher, I just say the word and that's the way it is. No, friend, listen, that is dictatorship, not leadership. God did not make my wife my doormat. Now listen, there's a sense in which I do have the final say and I do have the final authority in my home, but I'm also to understand that I'm to bring the desires and the concerns and the cares of my wife in mind as I make the decisions that I make. Do you know I don't make a major decision without consulting my wife? No, I don't. I don't make a major expenditure. I don't make a major financial decision. I don't make a major family decision. It is something that we do together. We have a partnership. Now, I know that God is vested in me, the final say. And I'm the one who has to make the final decision. But it's something that we do together. And friend, can I tell you, a wife has no problem following a husband who has her concerns in mind. Who cares about her? But not only am I to preside, I'm to provide. I'm to provide the needs of my family. 1 Timothy 5.8, But if any provide not for his own, and especially those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel. God intended for a husband to be a leader and a provider in his home. But not only do I see a person to preside and to provide, but what about to protect? There's probably not a man in this room who normally would not instantly give your life for your family. Your wife needs to know that you would literally lay down your life for her if need be. But you know what? I find that most of the time, we're not going to have to be fighting off a criminal or someone that's trying to harm our family. Most of the time, the protection that needs to take place in our family is that of spiritual protection. of spiritually protecting our family, of caring for them. How many of you know what a king snake is? King snake? Oh, there's a lot of you. It's a big snake, black, has yellow markings on the back of it, and it's a wonderful snake. You say, preacher, why is this a wonderful snake? Because my granddaddy liked them, that's why it's wonderful. And if you didn't like it, he didn't like you because he said it killed other snakes that were poisonous. Well, he had been nursing one, I don't know, he claimed it had been there for 20 some years. He wouldn't let anybody kill it. Well, it just happened to go by my house and my wife saw it. She said, kill it, and I said, no. It wasn't an anaconda, honey, I promise. She just said it was huge. Listen, to my granddaddy, until he went to heaven, he never forgave me for this one, okay? So anyway, growing up, you don't kill king snakes. And so this one had been around for a long time, and it slithered by the house, and I sort of watched it go by, hoping she didn't, and she did. She said, kill it. And I said, no. She said, why? I said, because my granddaddy would kill me. He just lived right across the field from us. I said, that's his snake. She said, you kill it. It's on my property. I said, honey, you don't understand. You don't get it. If I kill that snake and he finds out about it, I'm in trouble. Okay? Get that. She said, you don't understand. If you don't kill the snake, my children will never go in the yard again. I said, honey, it's a protector snake. She said, no, it's going to be a dead snake. Go kill it. So what I did is I was a good leader, and I went out and killed the snake. So I killed the snake, and I hid the snake, and my granddaddy found the snake. Be sure and know your sins will find you out. Every time I'd get around him, he'd say, you remember that snake you killed? I said, granddaddy. I said, really? But you know, if you knew there was a rattlesnake in your backyard, you wouldn't let your kids out, or at least your wife wouldn't, until you killed it. You know what, I'm afraid there's some rattlesnakes in our home, men, that we need to take some leadership in our families and we need to treasure and value our families enough that we would take them out of our home. You know what, if you have a diet of music TV in your home, that's a rattlesnake, you need to kill it. If you have a diet of country music, television and HBO and Cinemax and all of these worldly things that your kids can get a hold of that can damage and defile their minds, you need to deal with that and you need to get that out of your home. Men, God will hold you accountable for the spiritual direction and safety of your home. He just will. But you know what I find? That too often, men, that listen, we're not being the leader in our home to protect our homes. And one of the ways that we can treasure our wives is by leading them spiritually, setting the right standards, being able to say, follow me for I follow Christ. Men, can I tell you, we need to quit sitting on the sidelines of spiritual do-nothing and get busy leading our families for God. Amen? That's what we need to do in our lives. Husband is to represent the family to God. He's to be the priest of his home. The idea of a man as the head of the family is that he has the role of being a spiritual leader in his family. That means that you're to go out and you're to lead in spiritual matters. Listen, don't let Junior pray over the meal. You pray over the meal. You lead the family in Bible reading and prayer time. You don't want to be the wife having to drag you out of bed to bring you to church. You ought to be helping her get the family ready so that you can come to church. You need to be leading your family to church. How important it is that we make that decision in our lives and serving the Lord and giving. Joshua said, as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. Now, I understand that there's some who take this to an extreme. And they believe that the husband takes the place of a pastor in the home is to replace the church. And I recognize that there's an extreme out there that some people go to and think that the husband is the priest of the home. It's like the pastor. And we can just have home church. Now listen, can I just be honest with you? The Bible knows nothing of home church. Where daddy's the pastor and mama's the deacon. This, I guess, is how it works. Listen, let me tell you something. I believe that God has created three institutions. One of them is the home, the family. The other institution is human government. The third institution is the church of the Lord Jesus. Each one of them has a particular role, and we need to understand that role. And the home is a place that God said that I have set. for family living and so that I might have a godly seat in that home as that primary institution. And then God has placed human government to have a moral restraint upon civilization and to restrain man's sin. God said that government is His minister for good. in the sense that it restrains evil. That's what it does. But the church, on the other hand, is God's place of ministry in the world in which we live to accomplish His will in the world today. And families make up churches. Isn't that right? And our church is only as strong as the families that make up this church. Fellas, it's your role to lead your family to the Lord, and you can treasure your wife by praying with her and helping her to grow spiritually and being a spiritual leader in your home. But then let me also say that not only should you lead your wife, secondly, you should love your wife. Look, if you would, verse 25. Husbands, love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it. I want to give you four ways to love your wife and I want you to jot it down. Number one, you need to love her authentically. What do you mean by that, preacher? That means you want to be genuine in your love. It's a real love, not a pretended love. Listen, Jesus loved the church so much that he gave himself for it. And when you give yourself to your wife and you give yourself to your family, you are showing a real, genuine, authentic love for your mate. She needs to sense that you love her. Don't be like the fellow that said, now honey, I told you that I loved you the day I married you, and if anything changes, I'll let you know. No, you need to tell her. You need to share with her that you love her. You need to love her authentically. Secondly, you need to love her sacrificially. that there's some sacrifice involved. The Bible said that Jesus gave Himself. That means He laid down His life. He was sacrificial in His love for His church. And we need to be sacrificial men in our love for our wives. To sacrificially love her. To make some sacrifice. There are some times, men, that I need to give up what I do to spend some time doing what she wants to do. When I do that, I say, I love you. I love you. I'm saying, I value you. You're important to me. I believe one of the greatest dangers in the day in which we live is that two people who are married are living separate lives. The husband goes with the guys, the wife goes with the girls. We're doing this, and we're doing that, and we've got this, and we've got that. Can I tell you, my wife is my best friend. There's not another man on planet Earth that I'd rather be around than spending time with my wife. Hunting, fishing, I enjoy all of those things, but I enjoy being with her more. Now, fortunately, I have a wonderful wife that tells me, Honey, you need to go hunting. Or, Honey, you need to go play golf. Or, Honey, you need to go fishing. Because she says those things make for a happy husband. That's cause she treasures her husband. But I realize there's times that I need to make some sacrifice and I need to say, honey, I'll tell you what, I'm gonna lay this on the sideline cause I'm gonna spend time with you. Now I got married at probably one of the most unwise times in all the world. You say, Preacher, why is that? I'm the one who picked the date. I got married just right before the opening day of muzzleload season. My anniversary falls at the same time every year, muzzleload season. God said, Preacher, we're going hunting. I'm going on my anniversary. But you know what? I'm just making a joke here. Some of you are saying, what in the world is muzzleload season, Preacher? What is that? It doesn't matter. It just has something to do with hunting. Just leave it at that. But I look at that and I think, you know what? Listen, there is no D-E-E-R more important to me than my D-E-A-R, my dear. I share time with her and spend time with her and value her because she's important. It's called sacrifice. It's being willing to give up what I want that I might bring happiness in her life. You see, the reason why marriages struggle is because we want to make ourselves happy. Or we want somebody else to make us happy. We're concerned about our happiness, but the problem is that, listen, we're never made happy by making ourselves happy. True happiness comes from making our mate happy. and bringing joy and delight in their lives. And that's what sacrificial love is all about. It's giving yourself for another. And man, listen, when you lay aside what you want for what she wants and spending time, quality time with her in that way, you are valuing her and treasuring her in a way that you would do in no other. And you know what? She will love you for it. I'm to love her authentically. I'm to love her sacrificially. Thirdly, I'm to love her deliberately. I need to tell her over and over and over again. I need to share some things and explain to her and share with her and show her my love. And not only do I need to say it, but I need to show it. By spending some time with her and doing some things that she would enjoy doing. Remembering birthdays and cards and notes and bragging on her publicly. Those are important things. Sometimes it may just as simple as walking down the street and taking her hand or putting your arm around her. That saying to her, this is my wife and I'm proud to be with her and I love her. You're saying to everyone around you, you value her. You're treasuring her. You're treasuring her. And so you're to love her deliberately. Choose to love her and show her that you love her. An unexpected flower. An unexpected date. An unexpected time together. How important that that is. And then fourthly, you're to love her unconditionally. Will you jot that one down? You're to love her unconditionally. It's too often we put conditions on our love, but yet Jesus loves us in spite of us, doesn't he? Yeah, it's an unconditional love. He doesn't say, I love you, if. He said, no, I love you. And so we need to not put conditions on our love. And the Bible says that one of the ways that we can unconditionally and deliberately love our wife is by nourishing her. Would you look over, if you would, please, in verse number 29. The Bible says, For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourisheth and cherisheth. That word nourish means to nurture or care for. When we show we care for our wives by nestling with them and snuggling with them and sharing that time with them, we're nourishing and nurturing and nourishing the love in our marriage. The word cherisheth means to soften by heat. It means to keep warm. It means to show tender care. And when we show the tenderness and care in our wives, it creates a warm and tender bond between us. And I believe a nourishing and cherishing love maintains a healthy and happy and lasting marriage. So number one, I need to lead my wife. I need to lead her by being the spiritual leader and by striving to be the man that God desires and designed for me to be in the home. Number two, I need to love her. I need to love her authentically and sacrificially and deliberately. And I need to love her unconditionally. Jesus loved us deliberately. For God so loved the world that He gave, the Bible says. It was a deliberate act. And there needs to be some deliberate showing of love in our relationships. And then thirdly, I want you to look at 1 Peter 3. I'm to learn, my wife. Look at 1 Peter 3. You say, preacher, why do I need to learn my wife? Because she's different from you in every way imaginable. How she thinks, not just how she looks, but her whole makeup is totally different. Look if you go to 1 Peter 3 and verse 7. Likewise ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life. That your prayers be not hindered. That word dwell means to live with her. You say, preacher, I do. We share the same house, have the same address, sleep in the same bed, eat the same table. I shave in the same bathroom. You know, we dwell. Can I tell you that word dwell means more than just dwelling at the same house or address. It means to dwell down. It means to live intimately with. It involves a close companionship, a deep down togetherness. Men, you need to dwell with her, that involves intimacy. It'll demand your physical presence, you have to be there. You spell unconditional, deliberate, sacrificial, authentic love with these letters, T-I-M-E, time. I hear people say, well, it's not the quantity of time, it's the quality of time. I believe both are important. She needs your physical presence to time to be with her uninterrupted time together. I believe that little children need bedtimes. Can I help young couples? Will you listen to the pastor? Children need bedtimes. They do. They don't need to stay up as late as you do. Why? Because you need to give some time to your husband, and husband, you need time with your wife. You say, preacher, we have a hard time getting to bed. Choose to help give the baths. read the bedtime story, say the prayers with them, help the wife get them in the bed, so that you can spend intimate quality time together. You say, Preacher, how do you get that time? You fight for it, that's how you get it. You fight for it. But you have to have it. You have to plan it. You have to determine that you're gonna spend time together. It can involve a weekend to Gatlinburg, but it doesn't have to. You don't have to. It can be time at home. One of the things that I'm not is a handyman. I've said this before, I'll say it again. God called me to preach when I was 18, and that's all I've done my whole life. And if I had to be a handyman to feed my family, they'd just all die of starvation. I don't build birdhouses. I don't build anything. I'm not a woodworker, bricklayer, none of those things. I did some plumbing at one time, but that's about all that I did. I'm a jack of no trades and master of none, I guess. I can't think of any other way of putting it. Both my brother-in-laws, I hate them. No, I don't. I don't hate anybody. That's not right. I'm not supposed to say that. Now, I mean, they are, I mean, they're Mr. Handyman. They can remodel kitchens, bathrooms, I mean, you name it, they can do it. So I get them to come to my house and do what I need done. I just have Lori talk to her sisters, you know, and say, listen, you need to get your brother-in-laws up here to get some things done around here. But that's just not my thing, okay? It's just not. So one of the hardest things that I do as a pastor is talk about home makeover. I hate it. I hate it. I don't have to paint every 10 years. Now I know some of you are saying, Preacher, we paint every year. We paint when I get worn down. Usually somebody else does it. I don't paint. It's just one of those things. But one of the hardest things that I do is go to Lowe's. hardware or Home Depot. See, those are the places. We'll look at countertops. Let's look at window treatments. I mean, let's commit suicide. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. But nothing says to my wife, see, you need to understand what makes your wife tick. What makes my wife tick is home and garden TV. That's why it's not allowed on my TV. No, I'm kidding. But that's her thing. So I'm being a really good husband when I'm saying, okay, honey, let's go to Lowe's hardware together, you know? And we go to the window treatment section, and we go to the countertop section, and we're looking at the colors together, and they're all the same to me. It doesn't matter. As long as there's food on the table, it doesn't matter to me. I'm serious. I'm telling the truth. But I value her by valuing what she values. She values her home. Most women do. They're nesters. That's why you'll go over and help your neighbor or help your buddy fix his house, but you'll let yours keep leaking. You ever notice that? Wives are saying, you'll go over and help Jimmy or Joey or Johnny, but you won't do nothing. It's easier to go help them, because you've got that companionship or friendship, doing that kind of stuff or whatever. Whenever you can value what she values, you need to find what your wife values and spend time with her. My wife used to scrapbook. She doesn't do it as much as she used to do. She used to scrapbook. And she would spend time at night while I was reading or studying or whatever, and she would be building her scrapbook. She's got scrapbooks of ministry and children, one for each of the kids, and all of these things that she does. And one of the things that values is when I look at that with her. That's time. See, what I'm saying is you need to understand your wife. Man, let me tell you something. You'll listen to her with your ears, but you'll love her with your eyes. when you give her your attention. That's treasuring your wife. Notice, not only do I need to dwell with her intimately, I need to dwell with her according to knowledge. That means I'm interested in her. That is a special kind of knowledge. It's knowing things about her that no one else knows. Her needs, her hurts, her fears, her desires, her disappointments, secret thoughts and dreams. But you can't know that if you don't communicate and you don't share and you don't show an interest in. But it's not only a special knowledge, it's also a growing knowledge, a seeking to know, an inquiring and investigating. You want to know her better. You'll either grow together or you'll grow apart as you begin to mature in life. So important that you weave your lives together, that you leave cleave and weave, and that weaving is a lifetime of growing together and learning one another, and you value your wife by knowing your wife. Men, let me just say this, when you dwell with her, you're being intimate with her. When you dwell with her according to knowledge, you're being interested in her. But when you do this next thing that I wanna share with you, not only should you lead your wife and love your wife and learn your wife, but for lack of another L, I'm gonna change this to an H, you need to honor or value your wife. Look, if you would, verse seven. Giving honor unto the wife. That's something you do on purpose. You're giving honor. Here, you're making an investment. You're valuing her. That word honor means to put her on a pedestal. Let me just show you a verse. Would you look back at 1 Peter chapter 1 and find verse number 19? Let's begin at verse 18. For as much as you know that you were not redeemed with corruptible things as silver and gold from your vain conversation received by tradition from your fathers, meaning that you weren't saved or redeemed by material things, verse 19, but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot. Would you underline or circle the word precious in your Bible? God places a great value on the blood of His Son. And we need to place the same value on the blood of Christ that God does. I need to value His blood the way He values it. That's why we like to sing songs in our church about the blood of Christ. That's why we preach on the blood of Christ. Why? Because it's the blood of Christ that redeems us. Without the shedding of blood, there is no remission of sin. Friend, you cannot be saved tonight apart from the precious blood of Christ. But do you know that word precious and the word honor in 1 Peter 3, 7 is the same word? And God said, I need to give my wife the same kind of honor that God gives to His Son. God places His Son, His blood upon a pedestal, so to speak. It's precious. He honors it. He values it. Same word. I need to value my wife. I need to treasure her. She's precious. He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth favor in the Lord. She's the best thing in all the world for you. You value her or honor her before others. Be careful that you never, listen men, be careful that you never ridicule or make your wife the continual butt of jokes in front of friends and other people. She's not something for you to joke about. Secondly, never ridicule her in front of others and cut her down. Because while she may smile and laugh it off, you're scarring her on the inside. Somebody said that, somebody who said sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me or harm me, didn't know what they were talking about, because words do harm, and they do hurt. And when you cast off and cast down and ridicule and call your wife stupid and names in front of other people, you are breaking your marriage down, and you are dishonoring God, and you're hindering your prayers, and you're being a very carnal man, because God said you're failing to value and honor your wife. I honor her by respecting her. I respect her. I bring security, men. We bring security into her life. Women need security. They need security. One of the things that women desire, one of their basic needs is that of feeling secure. That's why many times men say, boy, I want a beautiful wife. Women are saying it many times. They're saying, I want a husband that loves me. I want a husband that I feel secure with. Not necessarily sight-driven like men are. They're saying, I want someone that's gonna put their arm around me that's gonna make me feel safe. Do you make your wife feel safe with you? Do you make her feel secure in your love? Do you make her feel secure in your commitment? Are you always talking about how other women look in front of her? Or making comments about others? You're not gonna value her that way. You value her and honor her by lifting her up in front of the children. By never talking down or talking bad about her in front of the children. And vice versa. I'll talk to the women next week. Now, you ladies don't lay out next Sunday night, okay? Okay? It's got to go both ways here now. And I've got the notes. But anyway, that's a side point. You lift her up in front of the children. One of the things I strive to do, and I don't always do it, there's times that I fail, but I try to, at times, to thank her for the meals she cooks. Say, honey, thank you for the meal. It's okay. She didn't have to cook for you. Maybe you ought to thank her for it. Praise her for it. I'm thankful that my wife keeps my house clean. I'm thankful for that. If she didn't, we'd be in trouble. But anyway, I'm glad that she does. I'm glad that she does the things that she does as a wife. And I'm grateful for that. Now, there's some times we might joke around and have fun, but I want to thank her publicly. And I do that in front of our children. And I tell them, I say, listen, you've got a great mom. You've got a great mom. I tell my son, you need to marry a woman like your mama, son. You say, preacher, why is that? Because I want her to feel valued in front of others. You can value her by opening the car door. I'm not always the best at that. I always do that when there's another preacher watching. Especially if I don't know him. Or if I'm preaching a Valentine banquet, I really make sure I'm doing it because I'm getting ready to go in there and preach on it and I won't be a hypocrite. You know. But if we're out special together on a date, I'll open the car door for her. I probably don't do it every time like I should, but I do. I always try to open the door for her. I always try to respect her. I always try to do those things publicly. But probably what means more to my wife than that is just taking her by the hand and holding her hand or showing her affection in public. That's something that she values. And you need to know what your wife values. You need to value her thoughts, her feelings, her desires. Treat her special. Remember the special times in her life, and remember her when she hurts. You see, there are times in people's lives that they experience some tragedies. Maybe the loss of a mother, the loss of a father. For some, it may be the loss of a child. It'd be a time to remember her. to give her extra special love during that time. Just the fact that you remembered, that you cared, that you prayed for her during that time. I can't stress how important those things are. You say, Preacher, I thought you was gonna tell us something really, really, I mean really out there tonight. You know what I found? I found this, that God's word is just extremely practical. Very simple. It's not hard. It's not difficult. It's not any of those things. It's just very practical of taking the time. And you know what I found many times? It's not the big things, fellas. It's the little things. It just is. It's the little things that says, I'm thinking about you. I value you. You're important to me. Those are the things that treasure your mate and meet the needs of her life and brings happiness to her heart. And so you need to lead her. You need to take the lead in your family. Show interest in your family. Show interest in her. And show interest in leading the things of God. And do it in such a manner that you're drawing out what's good in her. And you're not lording it over her. And then you need to love her. Love her authentically and sacrificially and deliberately. I mean, do it on purpose. By the way, you say, Preacher, I want my wife to love me more than love her more. Than love her more. and then love her sacrificially and unconditionally. And then you need to learn her. You need to know her and understand her and know things about her. You need to notice her. You need to notice hair color changes and styles and things of that nature. Those are things you got to work at, fellas. You know, most time we're going through life, we're oblivious to all that. You got to work at it, got to work at it. You say, Pritchard, do you ever get it right? No, you don't. You don't ever just get it all down. You're continually having to work at this thing called marriage. Somebody was really sharp and made a statement the other day. I can't remember exactly who it was or where I heard it, but they said, you know, if people put as much energy into their marriage as they do their wedding, a whole lot more marriages will be stronger, stay together, and be happier. I know people that I'll never forget that I've been to sometimes some of the simplest weddings, just simple weddings. Nothing flamboyant and flashy, not expensive. But yet there's two people there that love each other. So you don't have to have all the flash. Matter of fact, it's one and done. One time and it's over with. And everybody pretty much forgets it except that initial family. Nobody goes and thinks about it after that. The only people that watches the video again is when you go over and visit them and say, watch our video. Because you don't think about it. You're there that day because you value them. And listen, I'm not downplaying weddings. I think, listen, I'm just saying that if we'd put as much energy and effort, and I've seen weddings that are simple and two people that love each other and have wonderful marriages, and I've watched people spend $20,000 and $30,000 and $50,000 for a wedding, and it lasts three weeks. Lasts three weeks. Three weeks and she's already living with another man. See, that's just a moment. Marriage is a lifetime. And if we'll put the energy in our marriage, folks, If we just put the effort and the work at it, and we ain't never gonna get it exactly right, but if we'll just do that, I'm gonna tell you what, it'll go a long way to bringing satisfaction and harmony and gratification in your marriage and in your family. And men, listen to me, we have to work at it. We do. We gotta work at it. And tonight, maybe you need to determine, I'm gonna work at it. I'm gonna work at loving my wife and valuing my wife and honoring my wife and being intimate with my wife and being interested in my wife. That doesn't mean you'll never play golf again. It doesn't mean you'll never get to go fishing again or hunting again. It just means you put things in their proper priority and place. And you keep your family where it belongs. And when you do, you know what? Your marriage will be a whole lot happier. And I trust you'll do that. It might be a ball game or a ball that's in between. Be any number of things. Value your wife. Treasure her. He that findeth a wife findeth a good thing and obtaineth favor of the Lord. Protect her and love her. Amen. Let's stand to our feet.