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This morning, in part of our
10-week series, I've been asked... I have three sermons to preach
in the 10-week series on morality in marriage, and two of the three
are great. I got to kick it off with a normal
message about what marriage is supposed to be like. That's wonderful.
And even the message I'm going to preach in three weeks on singleness
and what God expects from singles and how singles should function
as they anticipate marriage, it's a great message. I'm so
excited about that. They're both from the Song of Solomon. And tucked
here in the middle, I got one of the other ones. And so if you're not aware of
the topic, this morning I was asked to speak on a Christian's biblical
view of pornography. And I've been dreading it until
I started studying God's Word. And I just gotta tell you, the
same thing happens every time. I'm just full because God has
great answers and great perspective on this matter. In the Pixar
classic, A Bug's Life, The movie opens with a couple
of mosquitoes or gnats or whatever they are, moths perhaps, flying
around near a bug zapper. And they say, don't look at the
light! Don't look at the light! The other one says, but it's
so beautiful! More recently, in the renowned
classic Wreck-It Ralph, they resurrected this concept of the
light eradicating the mosquitoes, the bugs. And
I'd just like to begin with that image. It's more kind of comically,
but not comically at all. What happens to the moths when
they look at the bug light? It's not good, but it's so beautiful,
seemingly so. Well, let me tell you what I
think we need to accomplish today. Our need today is to understand
God's attitude, to see His mind, to see His thoughts about two
things, the nature of pornography and the consequences of pornography. We need to discover how important
it is to God how important it is to God that we absolutely
avoid this perverse and dangerous worldly lifestyle. Why would we address this topic?
I mean, can't we just look past it? Well, we haven't talked a
lot about this, but the main title of our sermon series is
not even a hint. taken from this text in Ephesians
5.3, but among you there must not even be a hint of sexual
immorality or any kind of impurity or of greed. Now I want you to
stop for a minute and see the word greed. This idea of selfishness
as it relates to the perversion of God's design in sex is pervasive,
important, and if you don't get the idea that any perversion
of God's design in sex comes out of a heart of selfishness
and greed, you've missed the point. We'll unpack that a little
bit more, because these are improper for God's holy people. Why address
this topic? Because it's everywhere. Who's holding a smartphone? It's
everywhere. It's insidious and it's growing. It's attacking. It's taking lives. Why address this topic? Because
it's everywhere. In fact, it's supposed to be
something that is hidden and private and dirty. And now, it's
on my TV. I can't go up 69. Why a restaurant
called Twin Peaks? Why do I have to change the way
I drive and not go north on 69 to see the billboard with the
breasts? Just right there every day when
I go to work. So we'll go Keystone Avenue instead. Why? You have heard it was said, Jesus
said, you shall not commit adultery. But I say to you that everyone
who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed
adultery with her in his heart. Now during the Sermon on the
Mount when Jesus spoke of this way, he used this expression.
You've heard it said, don't commit adultery. Check. Almost 25 years
through my marriage and I have not, praise the Lord, failed
on that one. But that was inadequate in Jesus'
mind. Oh, that external, not enough.
But I say to you that everyone who looks on a woman with lustful
intent has already committed adultery in his heart. This was
so important to Jesus that he added intensifying language to
this, that he didn't add to any of the other ones. He said, hey,
if your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw
it away, because it's better that you would lose one of the
members of your body than your whole body be thrown into hell.
Why would he use that language? Probably this way. Paul expanded
on this in 1 Corinthians 6, 8. Hey, run away from sexual immorality. Every other sin you commit is
outside your body. Stealing? Outside my body. Lying? Outside my body. But the sexually
immoral person sins against their own body. Sexual sin is unique
and distinct. Have your attention yet? It's
just the introduction. It grabbed mine. It grabbed mine. Everywhere we go. In fact, guys,
Proverbs chapter 5, talking about the pervasiveness and just the
lunacy of this sort of thing would have been foreign to the
biblical writers, although there was certainly sexual sin at that
time. In the Old Testament, the sexual nature of a man was pictured
poetically as a spring. And the sexual picture of a woman
was pictured as a well for anatomical reasons, obviously. And so listen
to Solomon's writing in Proverbs chapter 5. He said to his son,
Rehoboam, drink water from your own cistern, water flowing from
your own well. Should your springs flow in the
streets, streams of water in the public squares? Why are there
billboards? Should it be out there in the
public? No. They should be for you alone,
not to share with strangers. Why, my son, should you be infatuated
with a forbidden woman or embrace the breast of a stranger? For
a man's ways are before the Lord's eyes. He considers all the paths.
A wicked man's sins trap him. He gets tangled in the ropes
of his own sin. He will die because there's no discipline, and he
will be lost because of his great stupidity. We have to see God's
mind on this. Well, just a whisker here of
introduction. And let me back up just one second.
Let me tell you how this is gonna go here. I'm trying to tease
you with the idea of pornography and get your mind in that thought. Then we're gonna step away from
that because this is Sunday morning. This is not a workshop. This
is not a seminar. This is a sermon. and I want
to teach you from God's Word, and I want to bring exaltation
and great glory to the name of Christ, and I would hope to benefit
you in your spiritual life. So God led me to a great text
that we read that I think will do that, and also will allow
me then to come back at the end, and we'll come back to pornography
and the idea of that, and make some observations that I hope
help you see it through God's eyes. and allow you to battle
it more effectively in your life. That make sense? So I'm just
teasing it here for a minute, then we're gonna step away and
we're gonna study a text a little bit without considering pornography,
just in its normal context, and then come back to
this, okay? Well, guys, it's a $15 billion
industry a year. B-b-b-b-b-billion. Just put your
mind around that. I know the NFL has grown. This
was about four years ago that I read the statistic that the
porn industry was bigger than all of the major sporting industries
combined. I know this is a little hard
for you to read. From 2014, the following percentages of men
say they view pornography at least once a month. 18 to 30
year olds, 79% say they view pornography once a month. 67% of 31-49 year olds, 49% of 50-68
years old. At least several times a week,
63% of young men, 38% of middle-aged men, 25% of senior men. People say it's only a man's
thing. No, that's not true. The following percentages of
women say they view pornography at least once a month. Young women,
76%. Middle-aged women, 16%. Senior
women, 4%. And at least several times a
week, young women, 21%. One in five. So sad. 31 to 49-year-olds, 5%. Senior
women, 5%. It is a huge industry. It started as, back in the day,
before the digital age, VHS and magazines, playing cards, Boy, it's changed. And morphed. And that's what makes it so insidious.
I don't want to spend a ton of time on that, you probably understand.
But let me make it very plain to you. It's enormous. It's after you. It wants your
wallet, and the byproduct is it takes your soul. It wants
your children. It wants your grandchildren.
It is evil. And I'm trying to be a little
dramatic here, and I'm not the most dramatic guy, but I hope
that you're getting the point. And it is not anything to be
ignored in our culture. In younger cultures, or in previous
cultures, where this was on the shelf and a little bit behind,
Children were not exposed to this sort of thing as regularly
and as frequently, but my goodness, friends, we live in a sexually
explicit and addictive culture. It's everywhere. Everywhere. Even your innocent little sitcoms
are all about sex. Not so innocent. All right. Turn your Bibles to Ephesians,
chapter four, where you just were. What a great text. I'm gonna
try to step away from the idea of pornography just for a minute
and teach this text. And you're smart guys and ladies,
you'll probably begin to see the seeds of things that are
gonna come out of this again. But I love the book of Ephesians.
It's wonderful. If you've never seen how the
second half breaks down, it's wonderful. Paul uses an expression,
peripeteo in the Greek means to walk. It's commonly translated
to live. And verses one through six, he
says we're supposed to, I should, I'll butcher this and you don't
have to turn all of this. I just want to explain the, organization
of the book to you. I should have been turning here
while I had you turn there. In Ephesians chapter 4, he says
that we're supposed to walk in a manner worthy of our calling,
that we're supposed to live up to Christ. Here in Ephesians
4, 17 through the end of the chapter, he says we're supposed
to not walk as the Gentiles do. In Ephesians 5, he says we're
supposed to walk in love. Later in Ephesians 5, he says
we're supposed to not walk as unwise, but as wise. And then
we come to the end of the chapter, chapter six, and he says, finally,
we're supposed to be strong in the Lord and in the power of
his might. And so there's these very natural sections of the
book of Ephesians here, where Paul addresses a variety of topics.
And this particular one, he draws a contrast. He says, you used
to walk like the Gentiles. Now we're all Gentiles here,
so that might Most of us are. I don't know if there's any actual
Hebrews here. There are Jews nationally. But I would assume
most of us, if not all of us, are Gentiles. This is a little
bit of a metaphor for the unsaved. It was used in that fashion still
in the New Testament, where Jews and Gentiles, still a very Jewish
church. And so he says, now listen, I'm telling you this from the
Lord, that you shouldn't walk the way unsaved people walk if you know Christ. I'm assuming
you know him. That's right, that's kind of
a funny thing to say. No, Paul said it. Remember reading that? Assuming you've
heard about him and been taught in him. Well, how do the Gentiles
walk? How do they live? What is this
understanding we should have? Well, in verse 17, he says, they
walk in the futility of their minds. Now, this is a direct
reference and allusion to the Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes,
where we learn that all of life is futile under the sun, apart
from God. If you do not have God in your equation, you learn,
as Nietzsche did, the German philosopher, and Hegel did, that
life's meaningless. What's the point? What are we
living for? Why are we even doing anything?
I mean, nothing really satisfies me. It's kind of boring. What's
the big deal? And so they seek to make meaning
out of their life, and truly, a life apart from God is rearranging
the deck chairs on the Titanic. You hate to have that job? I
mean, the Titanic is sinking, and we're trying to get everything
just right in our lives, and we are on our way to a godless
eternity in hell. That is pretty futile, isn't
it? That is pretty meaningless, isn't it? That is pretty empty,
isn't it? Oh, I grab a little pleasure
here at Ruth Chris, and oh, I succeeded in my job, and for what? In the futility of their minds.
In fact, 1 Corinthians 2, Paul says it very, very plainly. He
says, of the world apart from Christ, professing to become
wise, they're foolish. They don't ask the right questions
so they could never get the right answers. I'm so tired of talk news and
talk radio because they never ever bring God into the equation.
And so I have this semantic equivocation that I constantly have to do
in listening to them. And I'm like, you know what?
You are putting band-aids on people where they need tourniquets. It's horrible. The futility of
their minds. He goes on in verse 18 and he
says, they are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God
because of the ignorance that's in them. Now I can't help but
Paul is thinking about Jesus in his life when he looked out
on the masses and had compassion on them because they were like
sheep without a shepherd, and he said, the fields are white
unto harvest. Pray the Lord of the harvest
that he would send laborers into the field to tell people about
Jesus. They don't know. They are ignorant. We are born dead, Romans 6 says,
right? We are born ignorant of God.
What a sad thing, right? People don't know any better.
And you know, we get so angry at the unsaved people, and sometimes,
and we're so short, and we get angry at the culture, and angry
at the way they're hijacking my nation, and angry. They're
just doing what they do. They don't know any better. Jesus
looked at that, and he had compassion. We really have to think about
our motivations, and how we behave and respond to the things that
are going on in the world. Do you expect someone who doesn't
know the Lord to act like they do? Oh, I do sometimes. I wish they would, but they don't. Due to the hardness of their
heart, they have become calloused. And why would you expect any
different? They have given themselves to every kind of sensuality. They are greedy to practice every
kind of impurity. Well, if you don't have anything
ultimate you're searching for, and there's no meaning and purpose
in life, what do you find yourself chasing? I'm only here 80 years,
I might as well have a little fun while I'm here. And if you
don't know the Lord, I don't blame you. But there's a better
way. But this is the way, this is
what we were called out of, right? A meaningless, empty, small life
where we are grabbing every, greedy for every kind of pleasure. Where every meal is about me,
and every relationship is about me, and every image is about
me, and every dollar is about me. Greedy to practice every
kind of immorality. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me,
me. God is love, love is giving. It's just a total cultural worldview
difference, right? And so he says and draws the
distinction again, but that is not how you learned Christ. Assuming you've heard about him.
Isn't that funny that Paul would say that? He wrote to this church
to tell them you shouldn't be acting this way. You shouldn't
be acting this way. This is not how I taught you
about Jesus. Were you paying attention? Did you really learn? Because if you don't have any
fruit on your root, I wonder if you have a root. Right? At least you should ask the question.
The entire book of 1 John was written for that. If you say
you walk in the light, or if you say you are in the light,
but you walk in the darkness, you lie. The truth is not in you. If we
say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not
in us. Paul says, I just want to put
it on the table here. I know I taught you about Christ.
I know we had a nice cathartic exchange where you said, yeah,
that's cool, but nothing's changed. You still live like you used
to. Can I ask you, did it make a
difference? Is it real? Because Christians
live differently than the unsaved. assuming that you have heard
about him and were taught in him as the truth is in Jesus."
What a great little phrase there, the truth is in Jesus. I don't
have time to unpack that, but... It's wonderful. All right. So
what do we do? What were we taught? How does
it change? Well, this is a great text about,
there are different ways that we're taught in the Bible about
how we grow. And this is one of the classical counseling texts
and one of the classical texts on how do you make a difference
in your life because you were called out of one style of life
to another. What is the process that I use
to change? And there are three-step process
here that God gives us that He then illustrates through the
rest of the chapter. And they are the fact that we
are supposed to put off the old man. There are things we're supposed
to stop doing. Anyone here ever tried to stop
a bad habit? Yeah? Me too. Is it easy? No? No? That's hard. And God knows that, so He says,
okay, we're not just supposed to put off certain things. Hey,
let's replace them. Anyone ever tried to replace
a bad habit with a good habit? That's easier, by the way. It's
easier. By the way, the statistics tell
us it takes about three weeks to stop an old habit and three
more weeks to start a new one. So if you're ever involved in
some time, that's just basic anthropology. If you're ever
in the midst of trying to change your life and like three days
in you're like, gosh, this is hard. Yes, you're not quite there
yet. Sometimes it takes three weeks
to break an old one, three more weeks to create a new one. So
there's nothing wrong with that. The spiritual life is a growth
process, right? So understand that. So put off
the old man. put on the new man." A little
image here, shedding the old clothes, let's get some new ones
on, okay? Colossians, actually, in a very
sister passage, where Paul maybe wrote these letters in very,
very close proximity to one another from a chronology, uses very,
very similar language and over there says, hey, we should take
off those clothes and put on these clothes. What a great image,
right? We should put off those nasty old clothes and put on
the new clothes. All right, well, If you look
at verse 22, we're gonna learn something about the old clothes.
You gotta get rid of the old clothes, okay? What do the old
clothes look like? I mean, I can't say get rid of
that ugly plaid blazer, you know? If I tell you throw your clothes
away, you might throw them all away. I gotta tell you which
ones to throw away, which ones to keep. To put off your old
self, which belongs to the former manner of life, that's what he
just described, the way the Gentiles live, and is corrupt through
deceitful desires. Which clothes do you need to
get rid of? The ones that are full of lies that gets you to
behave in a greedy, selfish, desire-oriented way. Does that
make sense? The old manner of life is being
corrupted through deceitful desires. We say you can't live according
to your feelings. This would be one of those key texts that you shouldn't
just do what you want. If it feels good, do it. No. Those jackets and jeans and shirts
should be in the fire. That is corrupting you in accordance
with deceitful desires. Your desires are deceitful. What does deceitful mean? They
lie. Your desires lie to you. The heart is deceitfully wicked.
Who can know it? There is no one who seeks God.
No, not one. We have all turned away, and
every one of us has gone their own way, and the Lord laid on
Him the iniquity of us all. This is basic Christianity anthropology,
one-on-one. When you have a desire, you should
ask, is it lying to me? Aren't there things in the world
that look good that are not good for you? Oh, I'm getting ahead
of myself. There are things you want that
aren't good for you, right? And even too much of a good thing
can become a bad thing, right? The old man is corrupted. through deceitful desires. We
must not live in a way that is simply giving capitulation to
our urges and our feelings and our desires and our wants again
and again and again and again. This is the lifestyle of an unsaved
person. Okay? So those are the clothes
we got to get rid of. They need to go to Goodwill.
No, don't give them to Goodwill. Someone else will buy them and
that'll be bad. Just burn them. Okay? Now we're supposed to put on
the new clothes. Verse 24, put on the new clothes
that are put on the new self created after the likeness of
God in true righteousness and holiness. So where the old clothes
were characterized by deceitful desires, the new clothes are
characterized by true righteousness and holiness. So over there we
had deceit, over here we have truth. Over there we had desires,
over here we have righteousness and holiness. Okay, Sunday school
quiz. This is the easy one, right?
Okay, so you already know the answer, right Greg? Because I
already told you it's a Sunday school quiz, so you know the
answer. What things do you know that are full of truth, righteousness,
and holiness? Two answers. God's Word and God
himself. Very good. Anybody want to submit
any other answers for consideration for things that are full of true
righteousness and holiness? There are no others. Jesus. Yes,
exactly. That's the Sunday school answer.
So, in contrast to that, the clothes that we put on are things
that, or maybe we say it this way, that we would live more
principally. that we would seek to do to know what is true and
imitate God in heaven who is righteous and holy. That make
sense? See the contrast there? Okay. But right now, guess what? That's
all you. It's all you. And the Bible says I'm crucified
with Christ. Nevertheless, I live. But not I. It's Christ who lives
in me. In the life I live, I live by
the power of the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for
me. So this can't just be some behavioral concoction where I
summon the strength to ditch the bad habit and run over here
and exist another three weeks and create a new habit and replace
it and I did it and call it spiritual growth. No. It could be good. Could be good
for you. Might not be a bad thing to get sent out of your life
and do it. I'm not saying that would be evil. I'm simply saying that
might not be Christ-like growth. because we skipped verse 23.
Did everyone notice that? And verse 23 is probably the
most important part, and I think it's one of the most neglected
parts of this whole equation, and it says that we are to be made
new in the spirit of our minds. It sounds kind of like Romans
chapter 12, where we're told not to conform to the pattern
of this world any longer, but to be transformed by the renewing
of our minds. And if you think about this,
the New Testament of 2 Corinthians 11, 3, we're told we're supposed
to take every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ.
By the way, did you know that? Did you know you could take your
thoughts captive? I like to say it this way. The
air in your lungs that wants to come out of your mouth can
go through your brain first, and be stopped. I know it's a
little shorter there, but it's good to let it effervesce there
into the cranium and then let it come back down in the mouth.
And sometimes you'll actually think of something and not say it.
It's actually possible to begin to think about something at two
in the morning. Can't sleep, failing to trust
God, getting worried, and say, no, I need to take those thoughts
captive. Captive to the trust of God.
You are in charge to some extent about how you think and what
you think. And so, we have to begin to see life through God's
eyes and allow God to renew our minds and change our hearts so
that this putting off and this putting on is the expression
of Christ living in us and God is receiving the glory for the
change that occurs in us. And that's the missing ingredient
that many, many people don't understand. And so he gives,
I'll give you an easy one that we're not talking about this
morning, but he says, let him who stole steal no longer, let
him labor with his hands so that he may have something good to
give to the one who's in need. Okay, so we're not gonna talk
about that, I'm just gonna illustrate the put off, the put on, and
the new mind, okay? So, let him who stole steal no
longer, but let him labor with his hands so that he may have
something good to give to the one who's in need. What is the
put off? Don't steal. Let him who stole steal no longer.
That's the put off. What's the put on? Well, let
him work. What's the new mind? So that he may have something
good to share with the one who is in need. Why do people steal? Because I want that. I want that. Who are they focused on when
they want that? Themselves. Does that sound like a deceitful
desire? Is that the old man? I want that. I want that. Oh,
yeah, yeah. Wait a minute. What does God
say about love? Love is you before me. Love is,
like God said, God demonstrated His love for us and that while
we were still sinners, Christ died for us. For God so loved the
world that He gave His one and only Son. Love is giving and
extending and not worrying about yourself but giving to other
people. When you begin to see that others need stuff more than
you do, now you're changing your thinking. Now God is living in
you and it's going to be much more natural for you not to take.
And it's going to be much more natural for you to give because
you understand it's not about you. It was about them. Does that make sense? It's the
new, my God, change the way you think, change the way you think.
All right, now verse 25. In our text, that lends itself much
more to pornography. Okay? I've often wondered about
this. And through this study, I've
come to some conclusions. Verse 25. Therefore, Having put away falsehood, let
each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, because we're
members one of another. The first two questions are pretty
easy, right? We've got to think about that third one for a minute.
Hopefully your mind, I'm smelling a little smoke out there and
that's a good thing. That means you're awake and thinking. What's to
put off? Falsehood, lying, dishonesty,
right? So will we all agree, Christians? that the Bible says
that we should put off lying, dishonesty, falsehood. Yeah? Anyone besides me still struggle
with that a little bit? I mean, that's all shades, right? That's everything. Embellishment. White lies. Lies to not disappoint
somebody. Lies to make yourself look a
little better. Lies, even, that you're going to go fix in a minute.
Yeah, I cleaned my room. Whatever. But we're supposed
to get rid of all of them, right? And instead, we're supposed to
tell the truth. Now what happens, and I've discovered
in counseling, even in my own experience, that some people
decide I'm not going to lie anymore. and that's incomplete. If they
only do step one, take off the old, you know what happens eventually?
That old manner of life comes back. And they get painted into
a corner at work, or at home, or at school, or something, and
a little lie pops out to take the pressure off. So you can't
just decide not to lie, that's only step one. But step two is
even better, where you say, okay, I will become a truth teller.
Are you a truth teller? Are you a truth teller? What
a great thing, right? Remember what I said earlier,
God is truth? If you're a truth teller, that means you tell people
about God. Are you a truth teller? Have you decided that you will
never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, under any circumstances,
no matter what, represent anything that isn't true? Now, I don't
want to get into some of you guys out there who are already
being skeptical of me. Well, what if you're a spy in a war and you're told
to pass out disinformation? Yeah, okay. I'm just talking
about your daily life, all right? Let's deal with the exceptions
later, okay? But you've decided, hey, under
normal life circumstances, I'm just telling the truth. I think it was C.S. Lewis who says,
politicians could really learn from this. C.S. Lewis used a
sentence that only used one-syllable words to describe whether something's
a true or a lie. If one says of that that is,
that it is, or of that that is not, that it is not, he speaks
the truth. If one speaks of that that is
not, as it is, or of that that is not, that it is, he does not
speak the truth. What is the meaning of the word
is, you know, Mr. Clinton? You don't know where we are. This
is truth and lies. And I'm so tired, I watch Fox
News and I'm like, oh my gosh. I mean, but this is our society,
okay? But have you decided, rabbit
trail there, back here, lasso, every thought captive, and have
you decided that you will only tell the truth, only tell the
truth, only tell the truth? I hope so. But now we've got
to get to the middle ground. Because those things are just
external decisions you can make that might not allow Christ to
live in you, which is what we want. So, that third part's a
little tricky. Now remember, it's going to describe
the new mind. The new mind. And this is what
he says about why. Why, for the glory of God, and
for the good of his church, we should put off lying and tell
the truth. Ready? Because we are members
of one another. Huh? What? I don't get it. Oh, yeah, you do. It's the difference
between reality and fantasy, and whether you engage into real-life
relationships or whether you live in fantasyland. When my
five-year-old cheats in a game to win and says, I won, Daddy! You didn't. That's fantasy. It's not real. You've disconnected
from reality. How can we have an honest relationship
when you are lying and cheating? We are no longer members of one
another. You have gone off into fantasy
land. You have disconnected from the
group. Who's the leader of the group?
God? Does God lie? God is truth. So when you lie,
you disconnect yourself from truth, God, reality. It's not real. You're in fantasy
land. Who wants to live in fantasy
land? Maybe it's a good place, I don't know. Man, you apply this all over
the world, husband and wife. I promise, you only, you only,
you only. Fantasyland. At school, you cheat on a test. You get a grade. Fantasyland. Oh, the teacher might think it.
It might show in the book. It's not real. It's not real. Where's the truth? Does that
make sense? You have disconnected from truth
and honesty and you are just inevitable. And I got to ask
you a question here. What do you want to be? Do you want to
be honorable or just deceive everybody into thinking you're
honorable? Is there a difference? Do you want to be spiritual or
are you satisfied with just everyone thinking you are? Is there a
difference? We were laughing last night,
me and my girls, about that wonderful clip, it's Reformation Sunday,
from the movie Luther. I don't know why more people
just can't get their mind around this and what reveals the heart
that doesn't understand, that lives like the Gentiles. When
people come to you and say, that was wrong what you did, everyone
wants to say, no, no it wasn't. And instead you should say, you
don't know the half of it. You think I'm bad? I'm really
bad. What is wrong with that? We say
we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. Put off, put on, see life through
God's eyes, take into account the divine perspective, understand
wisdom. So as far as it relates to this,
the first example, when he just goes through, hey, don't let
the sun go down in your anger. Don't give the devil an opportunity.
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but
only that which is good for the edification of the saints. I mean, he just
illustrates this again and again and again and again through the
rest of the chapter. We don't have time to mine it all out. It's not
my point this morning. But put off, put on, don't ignore that
middle part. Isn't that a fun exercise to
think? Doesn't that help? To think that when I lie, steal,
and cheat, I disconnect from God himself, who is only true
and only purports truth? The stakes become so high and
I think, oh no, no, I will not trade. I pray I won't trade.
I don't want to trade my relationship with God for a white lie. Or for skeletons in my closet. Or for little sections of life
that I don't want anyone to know about. Alright. What can we learn from this text
about pornography in the last few minutes here? Well, let me
tell you a few things about pornography as it relates to this text, and
specifically verse 25. First of all, porn is futile
and destructive. Now sex is a wonderful thing
created by God, given to married couples. And I like to picture
it this way. I don't know if you can see those
pictures there. In fact, God said that love is the very flame
of Yahweh and sex is the greatest expression of love that a husband
and wife can give as long as it's self-less sex, not selfish
sex. where that is a great opportunity
for them to express their love, their giving, pleasure, one to
another, not worried about themselves, worried about the other person
fully in that regard. And so on the left there, you
have a picture of fire in a fireplace. Anyone have a fireplace? Fire
pit, don't you enjoy that? Marshmallows, hot dogs, warm,
just beautiful. On the left there, fire out of
control. You see the house fire there?
Anyone ever been part of a house fire? Been around a house fire,
couple hands, no fun. No fun. God understands this. That sex,
remember, any sin that a person commits, sexual sin, is a sin
in their own body, and it is addictive, and it is grabbing,
and it is pointless, and it grabs you, and it wants more, and more,
and more, and more of you. When you take the fire out of
the fireplace, I'm just telling you it's a bad idea. We'll unpack
that a little bit more here. Does that make sense? It is futile.
It's not meant to work that way. The end of it, I had another
graphic there, just said, one more, one more, one more, one
more, one more, one more, one more. Because any type of greedy,
deceptive, desire-oriented lifestyle, you have to go right back to
the book of Ecclesiastes where Solomon wrote, the eye is never
satisfied with seeing, the ear is never satisfied with hearing,
there will always be a little more you want if sex is you taking. You'll never be satisfied. it
will not satisfy you. Any more than that last dress
you bought that was so cool the first time you wore it, and then
the third time you wore it, it's like whatever, and now it's laying
in the bottom of your closet. Or the new car you bought that
was so great, or the first bite of the meal when you're really
hungry, where does the satisfaction level go from there? If we live
craving lifestyles, we will never, ever, ever be happy. Ever. We're not made that way. We're
made in the image of God, as Pastor taught us last week. So
we were designed to serve and to give, not to take. We can only be happy when we
are giving. So that idea of futility is so
important. Another thing here that's really,
really important as I'm just transitioning there and I was
on to it. Sex perverts love into, I'm sorry, porn perverts love
into selfishness. The feelings of romance and infatuation
and sexual pleasure are desires, right? And if we allow our lives
to be oriented around desire, what was the word used to describe
those desires? Deceitful. Will those desires
ever lie to you? Will they ever lie to you? Will
they ever take you to the bug zapper? Don't look at the light,
but it's so beautiful. In fact, our society is so, so
messed up. When people say, I love you,
what many of them mean is, I love me, and I like the way you make
me feel. And by the way, if you ever stop
making me feel this way, I won't like you anymore. because they
have not thought so deeply. The premarital counseling I do,
I'm like, okay, I know it's cool. I mean, I'm talking to my own
son. I was in a relationship. I'm like, look, I know it's cool.
I know it feels exciting. I know it's great. But are you ready?
Have you decided for her, nobody else, as long as you live, that
you are done with your own desires, your own wants, your own initiatives,
and you are ready to love that person, for better, for worse,
in sickness and in health, no matter what happens to their
appearance, no matter what happens to their mental state, whatever happens
to their spirituality, are you ready to be, Old Testament image, Hosea
to Gomer if you marry them? Because it is not about, I love
me, and I happen to like the way you make me feel. Man, that's
horrible. Sex perverts love into selfishness. In fact, 1 Thessalonians 4, verse
3, this is the will of God for your life, your sanctification,
that you abstain from sexual immorality, and that each one
of you know how to control, listen, look at this, control his own
body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the
Gentiles who don't know God. Does that sound just like the
passage we just read? Well, he's applying the sexual nature of
it, and so I gotta transition here for a minute. If I might
say, turn the tape off, okay. There are Christian counselors who actually teach that masturbation
is a great gift to singles. Now, I want you to think about
this for me, just for a second. I know it's a little bit, oh my God,
did he say that? Yeah, let's just think about
it. We're already talking about pornography, right? What do you
think the natural extension of that is? This is about taking pleasure
for yourself, self, self, self, self, self. Do you really think, we talked
about how hard it is to break habits, and we're not even done
talking about porn yet, we gotta move, but if you start a boy
at 10 years old on pornography and masturbation and just self-pleasure,
okay? I'll just call it self-pleasure,
okay? And so pornography and self-pleasure, and now this is
a habit and a lifestyle begins ingrained, and it's going, and
he is all about pleasing himself. and it's a secret sin and it
is duplicitous and he is hidden it from parents and siblings
and friends because it's dirty and nasty and nobody wants to
know and he's disconnected from reality and he is not a member
of one another. He is out there, okay? And then
he hides it, and he meets this girl, and it's all fun, and you
know how hormones and romanticism can take over. Can you imagine
them getting at the altar, and they get married? And now he's
supposed to figure out how to change 12 to 14 years of intense
sexual habit, of selfish orientation, and now decide, oh, I'm going
to make it 100% about her. Are you kidding me? That is no
gift to singles. We are not to engage in selfish
pursuits of pleasure as it relates to sexual sin. We are not. Not, not, not, not, not. Greedy. Greedy for every kind of sexual
pleasure. Take, take, take, take, take,
take, take, take. That is ungodly, is the perversion of love, yes?
Love is you before me. Love porn just perverts, perverts
love into selfishness. totally changes the whole equation.
Sickening. Because it gets to the character
of God himself, who is loving. And love is the greatest expression
of God. It's horrible. I hope that's helpful. Well,
can't miss this. Porn leads to addiction. Deborah,
I couldn't help it. I had to put the Dr. Pepper up
there because everybody knows. The thing about this, you know
you're an addictive person. Everyone's an addictive person
and if it gets a little, they call people workaholics, right?
Golfaholics, you know, whatever, but the thing about work and
golf aren't naturally addictive. We already have addictive people,
people who like habits, people who like routines, they get into
things, right? Everyone gets into things, right?
So, we're a little addictive by nature, but work's not bad
and the golf's not bad and, you know, the different hobbies we
have, sometimes they go too far, right? But now we're talking
about little bitty substances. Now the substance is a little
addictive. How much more dangerous do you think it is to have an
addictive person with an addictive substance? Do the stakes go up
just a little bit? Now again, I'm not stopping drinking
my Dr. Pepper. It's right over there. I don't think this is
a dangerous one. But I'll tell you, I'm an addict. I am addicted. I drink one in the morning. I
drink water the rest of the day. But if I do not have that sugar
and caffeine in the morning, I will have a horrible headache.
I am addicted. Maybe it's not the worst addiction.
Now, you can all throw stones at me, but I went ahead and put
coffee up there because I know that got most of the rest of you.
So, I made myself feel just a little better there by tossing coffee
up there with me. So, I don't know. Raise the stakes. Again, I'm not... I just raised
the stakes a little bit, didn't I? These substances are a little
bit more addicting, aren't they? Can't be right. Japanese have
a proverb about alcohol. First the man takes a drink,
then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes the man.
seen great dangers of alcohol. I don't like it. Tobacco obviously
harmful for your body. I'm not going to delve into whether
these are, you know, what everyone's opinions are about those things,
but all I'm talking about is addictive people with addictive
substances, okay? Everyone understand that? That's
danger. Anytime you're dealing with an
addictive anything and you're an addictive person, young people,
will you think about that for a minute, okay? You can't change
these facts, okay? So just be aware. Be smart. That's
cocaine and heroin. Why did you put cocaine and heroin
up there? It's a little off color here. Engaging in pornography
not only erodes the soul, It also physically impacts the way
that your brain is wired. John Piper, in a recent article,
explains some research within the medical community that shows
that pornography has an addiction effect similar to cocaine and
heroin. Cocaine and heroin cause a high
in two distinct ways. But as the article explains,
viewing pornography taps into both of these causes. A drug
addict needs more and more drugs to realize the same sensation,
right? Likewise, pornography rewires the brain in the same
way. Pause. Every other sin is a sin
outside your body, but he who sins sexually, what does he do?
Sins against his own body. Rewires the brain in the same
way and thus needing more and more pornography to feel the
same effects. By the way, they know that. That's
why 73% of porn online is free. It's the softest, mildest stuff
because they know that once they get you looking, you will get
your checkbook out, you will get your debit card out, and
they will draw you in. You will need more and more.
Therefore, pornography is not only addicting in a spiritualized,
sin-craving manner, but your body becomes physically addicted
to the high and needs more material to achieve this high. This addiction
is both spiritual and physical, and it can all be accessed alone,
anonymously, in the comfort of your personal computer or your
smartphone. killing yourselves. What shall we say then? Shall
we continue in sin that grace may multiply? Absolutely not. How can we who died to sin still
live in it? Or are you unaware that all of us who were baptized
into Christ Jesus were baptized into His death? Therefore, we
were buried with Him by baptism into death, in order that just
as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father,
so we too may walk in a new way of life. For if we have been
joined with Him in the likeness of His death, we will certainly
also be in the likeness of His resurrection." Because we know
that our old self was certainly done away with, so that sin's
dominion over the body may be abolished, so that we may no
longer be slaves to sin. Because a person who has died
is freed. Now, if we die with Christ, we believe we will also
rise with him from the dead and not die again. Therefore, do
not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its desires.
And do not offer any parts of your body to sin as weapons for
unrighteousness, but as those who are alive from the dead.
Offer yourselves to God and all the parts of yourselves to God
as weapons for righteousness. Because sin will not rule over
you, because you are not under law, but under grace. Besides
this, knowing the time, it is already the hour for you to wake
up. from sleep, for our salvation is nearer than when we first
believed. The night is nearly over, the daylight is near, so
let us throw away the deeds of darkness and put on the armor
of light. Let's walk in decencies in the
daylight, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality
and promiscuity, not in quarreling and jealousy, but let's put on
the Lord Jesus Christ and make no plans to satisfy our fleshly
desires." It just can't be stronger. Romans chapter 6. The gospel
freed us from sin. Jesus did not die so that we
could keep living in the dirty old clothes. He wanted to transform
us. And He calls us out of darkness
to live in His marvelous light. Isn't that great? Do you want
to live in slavery? Porn will enslave you. By the
way, don't do heroin either. I'm not joking. It's going crazy
in our state all of a sudden. Young guys, there are some things
just not worth trying. How about porn and heroin? That's not even
worth it. It is killing yourself. Porn leads to hiding and lying.
I guess this picture didn't turn out very well, but this is Adam
and Eve, remember in the garden. Where are you? God said. I heard the voice of you walking
in the garden, so I knew I was naked, so I ran and hid. People who engage in porn, especially
Christians, who engage in pornography, they know it's wrong. They're
embarrassed by it. And so it leads to a life of
pulling away. Pornography separates friends
from friends. Pornography separates people
from churches. Pornography separates kids from
parents. It's horrible. It removes you
from the membership you should have. And you end up hiding and
lying and living in your box. Do you really want to embrace
a lifestyle of lying and hiding? When you worship a God who is
truth, and the book of Titus says, he cannot lie. It's horrible. It leads to a
lifestyle that is full of dishonesty. Put off lying, tell the truth. You ever been thirsty? Anybody? I am right now. I mean, I'm bad,
aren't I? I mean, really thirsty. Oh, come
on. I mean, like, where's my water bottle? All right. A book that helped me, I'm going
to close with here, just a section here, a wonderful section. I
think it's from the late 1990s. It's called Point Man by Steve
Farrar. The title of the chapter is Telling Your Kids What You
Don't Want to Tell Them. It's a section on parents talking
to their children about sex, and most parents struggle with
that. We as pastors have some resources for you. And again,
I know this wasn't a workshop this morning or a seminar, but
if, I mean, if you are struggling with this and you want to break
this bondage, please see us. We do have help, we have resources,
but let me just finish up here this morning. It's a story of
a dad talking to his son. I'm getting into the middle here,
and the father has just finished telling his son about his wife
and him and what sex is. Now, John, I continued, I want
you to know, it's really hard to understand right now, but I want
you to know that it's really a great thing. Moms and dads
enjoy it a lot. You'll enjoy it with your wife. But remember,
this is something so special that God only wants mommies and
daddies to do it with each other. Now, John, as you grow up, you're
going to have friends and guys in school say things to you about
sex. Most of them don't know anything what they're talking
about. The reason they don't know what they're talking about
is they haven't heard it from their dads. I'm telling you stuff
tonight that most seven-year-olds don't know. In fact, right now,
you know more about this than most of your friends. Seven. Hey, friends, seven might
be too late. You looked around at the culture.
I hate to tell you that, maybe you could wait longer when they
were in previous cultures, but my goodness, don't be second. Don't be second, be first, talking
to your kids about this issue. Be first. Nobody else. All right. But I want you to understand
something very important. If you hear something you're not sure of, any questions,
you can always come talk to me. I wanted them to know we had
an opportunity. Then I said, hey John, what do you know about
Playboy magazine? He said, well, Joey down the
street told me his dad subscribes to Playboy. Have you ever seen
it? No, but Joey told me it has pictures of naked women in it.
Listen, John, one day one of your friends is going to want
to show you a magazine like that. And if you see a picture of a
naked lady, you're going to like it. You guys think so? You know the Hebrew of Genesis
chapter 2, when God created Eve and showed him to Adam for the
first time in the Hebrew, I think he said, booyah. I think that's what it was. I could
be wrong on that. And he said, if you see a picture
of a naked lady, you're going to like it. But not everything
that is appealing to us is good for us. There are all kinds of magazines
that show all kinds of naked ladies doing all kinds of things,
and that's called pornography. And even though it's tempting
to look at those magazines, it's very important that you don't. It's
very important, John, that you protect your mind. Let me ask
you a question. It's kind of gross. If you were really, really
thirsty, really, really thirsty, and the water in the fridge wasn't
working, and the water in the sink wasn't working, The water
out of the tap wasn't working. Would you walk over to the toilet
and scoop a little water and get a little drink? Dad! That's
gross! I wouldn't do that! I know you
wouldn't, John. But that's what you do to your
mind when you look at pornography. It's like putting toilet water
in your mind. You want to protect your mind. So when someone wants
you to look at that stuff, Be man enough to walk away. They'll
probably make fun of you. But you tell them you're not
going to drink that toilet water. You're smarter than that. Yeah, it'll quench your thirst.
Yeah, we were made. We have cravings. Don't drink that water. It's
what it is. By the way, all those ladies? Somebody's daughter. Somebody's sister. Somebody's
son. All of them. Nearly. Bondage. Poverty. Sexual disease. It's horrible. It's fantasy. It doesn't even
reflect reality. What's going on after the vision?
It's horrible. It's toilet water. It's toilet
water. I invite the praise team back
to the platform. We have one final song. Thank
you for going down this little journey with me here. And I hope
that, like I said, if we as a pastoral team can help anybody with this,
please don't hide. You won't be the first, you won't
be the last. And it is, as one author wrote, everyone's battle.
Sexual sin is strong and addictive. Let's pray together. Father,
thank you for your love and mercy and grace. Pray that this would
be helpful this morning, but I pray mostly that we would have
learned more about you, about the cross, about how to grow
spiritually as well. And Father, thank you. The things
I've said about you today that are so true, that you are truth
and loving and can be trusted, and you're the best lover there
is. Never worried about yourself, but always seeking to pour out
your blessings into our lives. Help us to live lives that Seek
true righteousness and holiness. In Jesus' name, Amen.
A Biblical View of Pornography
Series Marriage & Morality Series
| Sermon ID | 102515172377 |
| Duration | 1:02:57 |
| Date | |
| Category | Sunday - AM |
| Bible Text | Ephesians 4:17-25 |
| Language | English |
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