Great emphasis. Now, if you're putting the two together, you may think, well, I thought we were in the middle of talking about marriage tonight, Pastor Brock. So what does it mean having a servant's heart? What's that have to do with marriage? Well, if you're asking that, I probably already failed in some respects. Because that's really what it is all about. Remember that overarching theme that Paul, before he ever gets into the responsibilities between husbands and wives and children and all the others, is submitting each to each other in the fear of the Lord. And that idea, again, what does that submission have to do with? It has to do with serving, serving each other because of our love for God. Tonight, we're going to be back in Ephesians chapter 5. And our second part of our series, of this message anyway, we've been in Ephesians, this series, for quite a while. Although I did talk to someone the other day whose pastor, and I don't remember who it was, and that's not the point, telling me their pastor was going through Ephesians, and he had been going through it for two years. So I have to admit, well, I'm not trying to pat myself on the back, but I guess say it could be a whole lot worse for you folks. Okay. So we haven't taken that long. We have taken a number of months and really though, if you wanted to, you could take that long in this book as there's so many themes and yet I'm always trying to find that balance between giving you the detail that you need. but not making it so long that you miss the message of the book and the key themes as well. And that's a balance, that's hard to find a lot of times and hopefully we're finding that. This is the second part though, we talk about marriage roles that reflect Christ's love. And recently in chapter four, Paul had called us as the church to walk as children of light. That walk requires us to walk in the light of God's truth rather than the darkness of the world. And we've gone through these themes already. But all of that also, that replies to marriage. We don't look at our marriages and base them on what we see in the world. That's not our standard. We're going to see tonight, and we were reminded last week, our standard is the picture of Christ and his relationship to the church. Folks, that's a high standard. And so we don't look to the darkness of the world or we will fail in this regard with our marriages or anything else in our lives. When we follow after, we walk as children that are in the light, that have a relationship with God. And there's three aspects underneath there that Paul really emphasizes. If you're going to walk as children of light, you need to look carefully to how you walk. As wise, walking as wise people, those that have the wisdom of God, that know how to apply God's word in every aspect of their lives. Not as foolish people that have rejected God's word. The second aspect of walking as children of light is making the best use of the time, verse 16, since the days are evil. And now we're in chapter five, as we continue on here, redeeming the time, being careful, carefully considering how we walk. And certainly that applies to being careful in how we walk in our marriages, in our families. And then I had that quote, that I was so proud of the other day. I'll throw it out one more time. I won't brag about it anymore. But fools just do it. Wise people think through it. And remember, if you just plunge into something without really thinking through, a godly response to something, then you're not practicing God's wisdom. And that's certainly true in marriages. Guys, husbands, as we get into this, we could save ourselves so much grief if we just thought a little bit more before we said what we wanted to toward our spouses or our children, but asking the Holy Spirit to guide us in what we say. And then this last most important one in regards to this passage is submitting to one another out of reverence to Christ. If you're walking in the light of God, you are serving each other. This is the guiding principle for these passages on relationships. We must live sacrificially for one another. That's what it means in being submissive to each other. This is straight out just self-denial for the sake of others, and looking out for others' interests, and not just our own. It's literally the duty of every believer in some form or fashion to carry this out. That is being submissive, subjecting ourselves to each other. And that is the umbrella over the rest of this. So wives, if you are interested in submitting to each other in this way and walking in light, then as Paul has, and I should say not just Paul, but Peter, we may look at this if we have time, Peter also mentioned the responsibilities of the husband and wife. But Paul says for the wife, she is to be submissive to her husband. And this was our focus last week. And just real quickly, what does this mean? Because we need to understand because as soon as you read these passages about wives being submissive to their husbands, it's like, you know, this dreadful thing that the world hears. And they think of you as a hate speech person and all these different things. And yet, that's not the point that Paul is making here. And so we need to understand what this means when it says, wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands. First of all, again, it's not the obedience that children owe parents. It's not any sort of snap your fingers, and I said that you need to do this, so I expect this to be done in a certain amount of time. No, that's disrespectful to another adult, obviously. Submission isn't the same obedience that children owe to their parents. It's an entirely different thing. Submission is also not a command of total submission to all men, but just one's husband. And I'll throw this out there, because I thought this was really funny. My wife afterwards, Phil, the service last Sunday, Phil mentioned something to her about music next week. And she said, Phil, don't you remember? I don't have to listen to you. I only have to listen to my husband. That's pretty funny, honey. Now he took in a good humor as it was meant. And she meant nothing bad by that, but the principle is there in that regard. Number three, submission is not a statement of inequality. Both men and women are equal before God. It's not saying one is superior or has superiority over the other. Both share in the image of God. And therefore, they're equal before God. And number four, there's a limit to submission. In other words, ladies, God doesn't expect you to submit when the husband is involved in sin because remember it says submit yourselves as unto the Lord that qualifies it that you need to be submissive or give him the Divert to him the authority that God requires of him, as long as he's following after God. Your husband is calling you to do something that God's word clearly says is wrong, then that submissive principle ends at that point and you need to follow God. I'm not gonna give you a list of those types of things, but as you pray and as you work through that, God will make it clear on those things. And we pray tonight as we look at the husband's responsibility that he would never do that. in his role as the husband. So what is submission then? Well, it's giving deference to the leadership of the husband to provide harmony in the home and to correctly portray the picture of the submission of the church to Christ. It's deferring to his leadership. It's not giving up your influence. Certainly, and then we need to understand this too, the wife should have influence and what she says and her opinions and her advice, they ought to weigh heavily on us. If we're planning on doing something and our wives say, well, consider this, I'm not so sure about that, that ought to be a heavy weight on us. We ought to give that careful consideration. But in the end, it's the wife saying, okay, I've given my opinion, I've given my advice, Now I pray that my husband will make the right choice and I, in deference to his leadership, I'm submitting ultimately to Christ as I'm submitting to him. And you may say, well, that doesn't sound fair, Pastor Brock. Well, remember the picture is so key. Christ as the head of the church. And again, if you've ever, if you read in God's word where he's had, where Paul and others have had to address worldly church doings and actions, and you've been grieved by that, that should want to motivate our ladies. Seeing a church that's disobedient to its head ought to grieve us. It ought to motivate our ladies to say, I want to be a good picture of the church's submission to Jesus Christ as its head. This is an act of worship, again, done to the Lord. And folks, ladies, it's not because the husband necessarily deserves it in any way. Many times we don't. And yet you do this unto the Lord. Well, that's only three verses. And the rest of this, The Lord focuses, Paul focuses here on the husband's responsibility. And again, as I said last week, husbands, if you were listening and saying, yeah, give it to him preacher, that's one of the best messages you've ever preached. Well, get ready. Cause Paul spends three times as long on discussing our responsibilities as the heads of the home, as he does the women's responsibilities, the wife's responsibility. And what we're going to find, husbands, men, is that we have been given a responsibility that is truly beyond what we can accomplish without the grace of God. Because we're going to see tonight that husbands should reflect Christ's love for the church. And his love should reflect Christ's sacrifice to the church. So let's read this passage together, Ephesians 5, starting at verse 25. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it, that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of the water by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church. For we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they too shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless, let every one of you, in particular, so love his wife, even as himself. And the wife, see that she reverence her husband. Father, give us understanding tonight. Lord, these are simple truths that have been around literally now thousands of years. This has been your design from the start, but our world so corrupts and twists the simplicity of your word, that I'm sure that there may be those even tonight that balk at some of these statements and have concerns and are bothered by these things, but Lord, help me to be clear and help us to be in our marriages, in our churches, solid, beautiful, loving examples of the relationship that Jesus has with his church, that we may attract a dark world that desperately needs the love of Christ. Father, we can do that by having good marriages, but we need your help and your grace because what you've called us to is too much. Father, we know as men that we are hard and difficult to work with many times, and that the ladies need your grace to be able to defer to us, And Lord, we also need your grace as husbands to in any way show the love and sacrifice that Christ has shown his own. What an incredible obligation and responsibility. We can't do that without your help, Father. And so even as we begin tonight, we pray and strengthen us, enable us to show love to those that are closest to us, to those that mean the most to us, except for our relationship with you, that we may then be good examples of our love for Christ to the world. All this we ask in Jesus name that we pray. Amen. Husbands should reflect Christ's love for the church. And in verse 25, he states it very plainly, right? Husbands, love your wives. And you may think, stop there. Okay, I'm a loving guy. I can love my wife. In our arrogant moments, we may think I'm kind of a blessing to be around sometimes. I'm, you know, as far as marriages go, I think ours is going pretty well. My wife never really mentions too much of the time that there's any trouble. And so I'm okay. Sure. I love my wife. What do we really understand what that means? Because Paul explains it in more detail throughout the rest of the verse. Love your wives. You've got this under control, husbands. Okay. Are you loving them as Christ also loved the church? and gave himself for it. Now we see in reality that in many ways the husband is given the greater, the harder responsibility. Yes, wives have to defer, submit to their husbands, but the husbands have to love their wives. And this love again is that beautiful agape word. It's the word love that we can only have through a relationship with Jesus Christ. but it's that sacrificial love that Jesus showed to us in sacrificing himself and dying on the cross and all that he did for us, gave all of himself for us. Now Paul says, now husbands, you get to do that. Maybe this leadership thing isn't quite as exciting as I thought it was going to be. This, if you're a husband, this is what God's called you to do. You can't shirk, we can't shirk our responsibilities, husbands. But with God's help, go forward with this. So here we have this picture. Love your wives in a sacrificial way. This is a command of responsibility that is unconditional, folks. Husbands, this commandment is not based on your spouse's actions, her behaviors, her attitude. Was Jesus willing to sacrifice all for us without our attitude being 100% toward him? Yes, we rebelled against him and he sacrificed all. So regardless whether our wife is acting or has the attitude or our kids in the way that we want, we don't have an option we are supposed to love unconditionally. And for that, we need grace. But folks, the grace that Jesus gave to the church, empowering them to live, is also the grace that he will give to us as men to be able to be the proper picture that we need to be. Does this mean to the point of dying? Well, certainly I would hope that if your wife was in a traumatic situation, a life-threatening situation, that you'd be willing to give your life for her. It's kind of marriage 101. But sometimes that's an easier thought for men than the other aspect of this is what Paul's really referring to. I'll give you a quote. I heard some wonderful teaching from Pastor Gary Reimers. Many of you know him. And on this subject in particular, wonderful, great teaching on this. And he said this, even more important than dying for your wife is living for her. And that's what we're called to do. to live sacrificially. That's what we get to do as the one that is the head, as the one that has the authority. Now we get to live for our wives and for our families and sacrifice for them. I don't know why this came up in my mind as I was studying for this, but one of those painful love stories that happen when you're in middle school, And in fourth grade, I ran into a young lady that made my heart kind of flutter. And I was interested in her. And I went home and told my family and my mom and dad, and it was a big deal to me. And she just didn't seem that interested. She made it clear in fourth grade, not interested. And so I thought, well, I didn't know anything about love anyway. So I just kind of gave up. Well, the next year, fifth grade, We got our assigned seats and lo and behold, this young lady was sat right in front of me. Oh, here's my chance to make a good impression. And so, you know, I said foolish things and stumbled over my words like any normal middle school child. And she found that funny. And she found me a source of humor to her and she had a friend that was sitting next to them. And so they were became very distracting. And they would actually Can you believe this, they would while the teacher was teaching and I was writing something down, they would point to me and they would laugh at me. And then she was sitting right in front of me and we would sometimes have to pass our papers quizzes back and forth, you know, to have somebody grade it. And you know, she turned around if she passed my quiz back to me and she scribbled all over my quiz. And I was deeply offended by that. But I knew, you know what? Hey, at least she's paying attention to me. This is great. So I'll put up with whatever I have to. Well, that in a nutshell is not what Paul's referring to when he talks about us as husbands putting up with everything that happens in our families. And that's not what I'm referring to. That sacrificial love isn't always just letting people, well, it isn't ever letting your family, your wife walk all over you, but it is doing whatever is necessary sacrificially for the growth of that individual. And whatever you do as a leader, it should be done with the love of Christ. It should be seasoned with Christ's love, not anger and harshness. And let's face it, men, that's hard. When things become frustrating and our kids don't do what we want them to do and our wives disappoint us, or we had expectations that probably too high of expectations that they didn't fulfill, we need to go back to not being angry, but remembering how Jesus responds to us and responding that way sacrificially towards others and to our families. He continues to describe this process more, verse 26, that he, now he's talking about the picture here of Christ and his love for the church. What does Jesus do for the church? That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of the water by the word, that he might present it to himself, a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that it should be holy and without blemish. And now Paul moves on to this beautiful picture of all that Christ has done for the church and his sacrifice for the church. Jesus' sacrifice was necessary. His death was necessary in order for us to be sanctified. And what does it mean here when it says that he sanctifies and cleanses it with the washing of the water by the word? Well, number one, It refers to the fact that when we're saved and we put our faith and trust in Jesus, that we are sanctified or we're set apart positionally and we're consecrated or we're dedicated to God as a useful tool to use for his purposes. When you put your faith in Jesus Christ, you are then sanctified or set aside and dedicated over to Jesus, to God's use. And that's expected. And so Jesus works with his church to make sure they're set aside, but also that they're useful to him. And that's a second meaning of this word sanctify. This word also describes our purification from sin. And it refers to here that Jesus puts the church through a sanctification process, that progressive sanctification that we've talked about many times before, that continues throughout our lives and that helps us reflect more of Jesus Christ in our life. It continues throughout our life. So it's both a completed action when we're saved, we're sanctified, we're dedicated, set aside to the work of Jesus Christ. But it's also a continuing process where we're continually sanctified and purified. And he's making us in to a beautiful picture of who he is and making us useful for him. This idea of cleansing. Remember that wonderful truth that's so necessary in the gospel, that the blood of Jesus cleanses us from all sin. When we put our faith and trust in Jesus Christ, We are immediately, we have that cleansing of our sin, and we're given Jesus' righteousness. But that cleansing has a second element as well. Yes, we're cleansed from sin through the blood of Jesus Christ, but we also have the Holy Spirit. We're given the Holy Spirit. And to be cleansed also means that he continues, the Holy Spirit, to work in us and purify us. How does he do this? By illuminating God's Word as we read God's Word, helping us to understand God's Word, and then directing us how to live out God's Word in our lives. And so Jesus, through the Holy Spirit and through his own shed blood, sanctifies and cleanses the church. through God's word. Verse 27 then, that he might present it to himself a glorious church. Here's the end result of this work. No spot, no wrinkle or any such thing that it should be holy and without blemish. And sometimes I think we miss the picture, the primary picture that Paul is trying to relate here. and we read this verse and we think automatically we focus on the bride of Christ analogy, and we miss the fact that Paul is pointing out here the husband is the head of the marriage as Christ is the head of the church. That's the primary analogy that Paul is pointing out to us and emphasizing here. So let's be clear of that. His primary picture husband, the head of the home, the head of the body of the home, as Christ is the head of the church. And he describes here then what the goal of all this. Jesus' goal is for the church to reach her full, beautiful, glorified state when he returns one day for it. And he's working that within the church, and he's working that within us, within the individual. And one day we will stand before him glorified, no spot, no sin, no wrinkle, and his work will be finally accomplished. It begins when we put our faith and trust in him and we have cleansing from sin. It ends when Jesus returns and we have our glorified bodies and we're able to be with him forever in perfect fellowship. And here is the process that Jesus is doing. in the church. So, as we look at this picture, husbands, you probably would think at this point, how in the world can I match up to that? How can I in any way be a picture of what Jesus has done for the church? Well, in some ways we can't. There's none of us that can sacrifice and offer up our own blood for the church. and sanctify the church, that's not the point. But the point is, there is some aspects here that we need to understand as the husband and as the head of the home. And certainly in this picture, some basic things. Man, God does not give authority to the husband to use for his own selfish benefit then, as we look at the picture of the sacrifice of Christ. Then we look at our own lives and say, I need to be the chief representation of Jesus in my home, of his love, of his sacrificial giving. My family, my wife needs to see that somehow in my life. The family should see the sacrifice and the love of Christ in our actions and decisions. That's a tall order. Husbands, in the end, our goal is not to wield our authority as a heavy hammer. It's not why God gave us that authority. That's not the picture that we have in Christ. But what our responsibility is, we can't do all that Jesus did for the church, but we can have ministry with our wives that allow them to then be the best that they can for Christ. That's your job as a husband. that you help your wife and family, help them to grow, that they can be the best that they can be for Jesus Christ. Now, again, husbands, that's a tall order, and yet Jesus calls us to do that. So that ought to humble us. What Jesus has called us to do, men, ought to humble us and ready us to be submissive to the Lord as he continues to do his work in us as well. Jesus' love or the husband's love should reflect Christ's love to the church. But now Paul gets much more practical and he says, is it still hard, husbands, to understand all the aspects? I know that I've just given you what may seem an impossible goal, and it is in some ways, And yet Paul says, okay, I'm gonna make it much more simplistic here, verses 28 through 33. The husband's love should reflect his care for himself. I wonder if Paul realized that the husbands would be overwhelmed with the responsibility that he has stated. And so he gives a simple practical standard. And look at verse 28. So ought husbands to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife, loveth himself. That's something that we as men certainly can understand. Men, don't we follow this standard rigidly when it's applied to ourselves? We're very good about taking care of ourselves. Just so we're clear, Paul's not necessarily in this passage saying that that is wrong. He's saying this is a normal part of human existence that it will be very important to you to take care of yourself to make sure that your own desires and responsibilities are taken care of. And husbands, he expects that will be the same with us. But this is something that we can understand. You know, I don't know about you, but sometimes when I get hurt, I can spend a lot of time even on a small cut or something that's in a lot of pain. And something that you look to somebody else and they might say, ah, you know, you're being a big baby, stop, get over it. I look and say, but it hurts, you know, Band-Aid or whatever. And men, many times we can be, when we get hurt, we can be so focused on that hurt and focused on what we need to do to make it heal. But you know what? When our wives are hurting, we tend to sometimes ignore it. So do we respond? to our wives hurt, as if our own bodies are suffering that same pain. That's what we're supposed to do. Excessively care for your wife, husbands, as you do for yourself. That is the principle that Paul is reflecting here. Again, as I was studying for this, a number of illustrations came to mind. A couple of years after we got married. Now, I've always enjoyed good health, and I've been thankful for that. I don't take that for granted. But a couple of years into our marriage, I did have to have an operation that limited my mobility for a while. And I'm one of these guys that I can't stand to be sick, and I don't like to be hurt, and I really don't like to have to go to the doctor. or the dentist or anything like that, even though I know I have to sometimes. And so after the surgery, it was the day before Thanksgiving. I remember that. And we were at Bob Jones University and I was finishing studying in seminary and Leslie was teaching Spanish and we weren't able to go home. And that was kind of, that was fine because we were kind of looking forward. I don't think it was our first Thanksgiving together, but it was like the third. Thanksgiving, and it was just the two of us and there was gonna be something really cool and neat about us just celebrating Thanksgiving together in our little apartment. And now it was all messed up by this surgery. And it may be more immobile in some ways for the next few days. And I have to admit, honestly, I was a little grumpy. Now, I'm not going to ask my wife if I'm grumpy all the time. You don't have to give testimony to that. But I was feeling and she was doing a great job of taking care of me and making sure that I got this. And she listened to the doctor and got all the things and stats that we needed. And she was doing a great job. And I was just miserable, but recovering. So the next day, Thanksgiving morning, Leslie decided, well, I was getting ready for the day to put the turkey in the oven and get the dinner ready. And so I was getting ready and again, I'm moving very slow and I just can't believe I don't like being in this predicament and all this. I remember hearing something thud in the next room over in our little small apartment and a scream, not a scream, my wife doesn't scream, but a cry, a beautiful little cry. She really doesn't scream. Of dismay, but it had real depth to it. I thought, oh. Something's not right here. That's not normal. And I slowly, the best I could, I'm slowly hobbling out to the other room and I open up the door and the picture that I saw was this beautiful turkey all over the kitchen floor. Juice, beautiful juices and everything everywhere. And here she is just in dismay about the fact that all this work she had put into this turkey and she was literally in tears. And so I realized at that point, you know what, Brock, you're in some pain here, but this isn't the time to be going on about it. Now, did I have a lot to learn as a young husband? I certainly did. But at that moment, the spirit said, Hey, that is a part of you. You handle and you deal with her now and take care of her. And I went over to her and I hugged her and I said, it's going to be okay. we can go out to eat, we don't have to worry about all this, and we'll take care of it, it'll be all right, whatever we need to do. And you know, we eventually, we cleaned up and everything was fine, and we did find out that even though you drop a turkey on the floor, it's still reusable. Didn't we reuse that turkey? Yeah, we did, and it tasted great. But it was that moment in my young married life where I realized my wife, we're one flesh, and when she hurts, It means I hurt and I take care of her like my own flesh. It's a beautiful picture that Paul gives here. For we are members of his body. I'll go back up to 29. For no man ever yet hateth his own flesh." And in fact, if you find someone that acts that way, we normally send them to a psychologist because that's not normal, right? We love ourselves way too much. Just as a side note, that common thing we have in our culture today where you just need to learn to love yourselves and that's your problem in life. Folks, the problem in life most of the time is that we love ourselves way too much. And we don't have a problem with loving ourselves. But husbands, we need to love our wives in the same way, in the same fashion, nourishing, cherishing them. Those are beautiful words. Nourish refers to the attention parents give their children, that care and concern that you hear when your little one is crying or concerned and you're very soft, you're gentle with them. Husbands, we need to be gentle with our wives. That's not just how we act as small children. We don't treat them like small children, but that nourishing aspect, we care for them in that way, our wives. And cherishing means to provide nurturing care. Almost the picture of a mother bird to her young ones, that word also has the idea of highly valuing something. Men, do we take this principle and use it as a hammer? This idea of submission, if we do that, we're not dealing appropriately with the truth that Paul gives us here. That's not what we're supposed to be doing. But we need to show care and concern for our wives and let them see the love of Christ in us and be gentle with them and be patient with them. That's something we can all do a little better. as husbands, all of us. Are you nourishing and cherishing your wife? And men, if you still don't get it, he says, even as the Lord, the church, let me put it this way, care for your wife with the same love that Jesus Christ cares for you. Men, can you remember recently when you experienced the love of Christ and Christ made it clear that he loves you and that he is for you and the comfort and all those things? Your wife deserves that from you. If you've experienced the care of Jesus Christ, then you should be willing to show that to your wife. We're all members of the body. Jesus cares for all of us. Our wives deserve that same kind of care. Cherishing, men cherish a lot of different things. Well, men, let's face it, we cherish a lot of different things in our lives, but we don't always cherish our wives the way that we should. If you have something that you cherish, a good question is, am I cherishing my wife more than this other thing that's so important to me? This also stuck out in my mind. I mentioned Jim Shetler's ministry to me at Pensacola Christian College when I was there in the early nineties. And you know, every so often you get a speaker that would come in and I think this is more popular to do back then. You don't see much of this today, but there was a, there was a time where it was deemed appropriate and funny for speakers as they continued their messages to make an emphasis by telling a joke about their wives. And this had happened a couple of times in the chapel and in the services at Pensacola. And this always stuck out to me, Pastor Shetler, I think, if I remember correctly, it was right after one of these men. Now, these men love the Lord. They were preaching about the gospel. But in this one area, they missed the boat in the biblical teaching in this way. And I remember Pastor Shetler telling all of us as a student body, he said, men, He said, don't ever be that preacher that gets up and makes fun of your wife in any way or fashion. So that's not cherishing her. That's not showing her importance. He said, in fact, if a speaker were to do that, I think it'd be appropriate for you to not laugh at all, to be quiet. So I will tell you, the next time we had a speaker that did that, it was very awkward because it was very quiet in that huge auditorium with hundreds of young people. And I think Jim Shetler gave a little... But we should people, we should have testimonies as men, as believers that love their wives, that are trying in some way or fashion through the grace of God to show love to our wives, to our families, the way that Christ showed love for us. And then he brings up Genesis 2.24, right? Verse 31, for this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife and they too shall be one flesh. And then he says this interesting thing. This is a great or profound mystery. But I speak concerning Christ in the church. You ever thought about this? What's so mysterious about that? That principle in Genesis has been around since Moses had written it thousands of years ago. Paul, everybody knows that. That's like one of the first major principles and teachings in the Old Testament. What's so mysterious about that? Well, when that was originally penned or whatever Moses used to write, because most likely we think that Moses did write the book of Genesis, and that verse is his commentary on marriage, led by the Spirit, of course. is that when a man and a wife read that, they understood that marriage had purposes, that it was for the purpose of companionship, that God understood that men needed a lot of help and that they needed a help me. And so God provides them for us in his grace. And there's that fellowship and relationship, that friendship that we have. It's also for procreation, to create families. But one thing that the Old Testament reader would have never understood, and that's why Paul's referring to this in 32, now he reveals to us something that the church and God's people didn't understand before, that marriage, and this is most likely the greatest importance, is a picture of Christ's relationship with the church. Amazing. Unfathomable. And we need to let that truth sink into our hearts, men. How are we doing on that? Are we in any way, do we, does it bother us when we don't reflect Christ's love in our marriages? At the very least, it ought to bother us. And we ought to say, Lord, help me. I know I was harsh. I know I was angry. And I know you've given me this responsibility. I'm the head of my home. But I, today, this week, am a poor picture of Jesus Christ. So Father, help me to show the love that I need to, to sacrifice the way that I need to for my family. Give me the strength to be able to do that. Verse 33 then, nevertheless, let every one of you in particular so love his wife, even as himself. And the wife see that she should reverence her husband. A couple other things from other passages of scripture, specifically for the husband as we finish up. What does it look like to love your wife? Paul says in Colossians 3.19, husbands love your wives and be not harsh against them. Then there's a real practical point. How many times, you know, people that you're the closest to, you tend to be the least careful in your speech. I'm a perpetrator of that too. And yet Paul reminds us, if you're going to show the love of Christ, be gentle. Don't be harsh with your wife. We all need that. Be kind. Another thing Peter says in 1 Peter 3, verse seven, likewise ye husbands dwell with them according to knowledge. Get to know your wife. Let your wife be the friend that you want to know more and more about. And folks, and men, she should be one that we want to get to know more, just like we want to get to know Christ more because of his love for us. Your wife was willing to marry you, and she gave the vows too, and she put herself in that position. Least you can do is get to know her better and understand her better and live with her in understanding, giving honor into the wife. Being submissive under you doesn't mean that you walk all over her, but you honor her. as under the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that equality that we share before God. And then he gives a sobering reminder that your prayers be not hindered. And then this is one of those times where the Bible makes it clear, if you don't have a right relationship with your right wife, God is not obligated to hear your prayers. And if God has felt distantly toward you recently, one of the first things you ought to do is check and see, how's my relationship with my wife? And that might solve the whole problem there. Well, as we finish up on these marriage roles that reflects Christ's love, we have a profound, amazing, inexplicable, responsibility, both the husband and the wife to reflect the nature of Christ in the church. And ladies, yes, you should have a desire to want to show the submission and the deference and the reverence and respect for Christ through the church. by showing that respect to your husband. That reminds me of a book that our young couples class went through a number of years ago, and I would highly recommend this to anybody who has not read this. It's very helpful. Simple, love and respect. The love she most desires, the respect he desperately needs. And that really kind of sums up what Paul is saying here as well. Men, love your wives as Christ loved the church. Ladies, respect your husband, and if he's not deserving of it, do it for Jesus Christ. In their way, therefore. we can be the proper picture. Not perfect. One day we will, as we stand before Jesus Christ, we'll be glorified, we'll be that perfect picture. But the more we follow these commands, the more we can be a wonderful example of God's love, of Jesus' love to this world that needs it. Folks, men and women, our world needs good examples of godly marriages. Let's ask him to help us in that. Lord, thank you for this reminder. Help us through your grace to be able to be this picture of Christ in the church and the love that Christ has for us. Help us to show that love to a dark, desperate world that needs this picture desperately. We need your grace and power, and we're thankful that you give it in abundance. All this we ask in Jesus' name that we pray, amen.