Ecclesiastes Chapter 4, verses 9 through 12. It says two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him that is alone when he falleth, for he hath not another to help him up. Again, if two lie together, then they upheat. But how can one be warm alone? And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him and a threefold cord is not quickly broken. I want to speak this afternoon about what it means to really be. And to really place yourself in the true friendship, what it means to have true friends, what it means to be a true friend. That's not really the topic that's on your sheet and that we are still going with the blessing of accountability. But I just want to, before we start off, get some ideas. What does it mean to be a real friend? What does it mean to be a true friend to somebody? Nick? Understand. All right, so we have understand. Good influence. Always being there. Point to God. Honesty. And really, you could lump five and six in the same boat. Honesty and unbiased advice. Can I ask a question? Because I had one of these in mind before I asked the question. And I knew, I knew, I knew, I knew somebody was going to say it. And it's not wrong. But it's what a lot of people say. What does it mean to always be there? I'm your friend, or he or she is my friend, and they'll always be there for me. What does that mean? Help them move. So, they're the good test. Tell your friend you're moving, see who shows up. What else? What else does it mean to always be there? Bad times or good times? Okay, and everybody has an idea about that. Here's usually what, not you necessarily, but here's what a lot of people mean whenever they say, you know, I thought you were my friend, I thought you would always be there. And really what they mean by that, and what we mean by that, but nobody's going to raise their hand and say this, is I thought you would always accept everything I did, no matter what. I can't believe you're not my friend. I thought you would accept everything that I did. I can't believe you would ever say or or or or act as if something that I did was wrong or could be disappointing or could be whatever. You're always supposed to be there for me. And I'm just I know we all of us sometimes kind of struggle with that. But I want to talk about for a few minutes this afternoon what it means to be accountable or to have accountability. And the title of it is The Blessing of Accountability. The Blessing of Accountability. Does anybody know what it means to be accountable or to have accountability with somebody? Good. To have yourself checked. There is a certain standard that somebody is going to hold you to. Okay? So it's not just you being you. All right, if your idea of a friend, and this is a pretty good Hollywood idea, if your idea of a friend is somebody that just lets you be you, and the more you are, the more they like you, that's a fairytale idea. Here's the truth. If you want to know how and why and just the easiest way to accept being accountable to somebody, and again, let me tell you, it's somebody that holds you to a certain standard. You've got to understand this about yourself. I've got to understand this about myself. OK, nobody. Listen now, this might be the most important thing I tell you. Nobody is as impressed with you as you are. You hear me? Nobody is as impressed with you as you are. OK, that's important for you to realize, that's important for me to realize, because here's what we think a lot of times we think and we talked about it earlier, we think You know, I go to church pretty often. I'm at this teen retreat. I'm hearing a lot of great topics. I wish more people were here. I wish whoever, my friend, really needs this right now. You know, they're going through a hard time. Whatever it is, we wish other people and everybody in the world could be here so that they could start doing the things that we're learning here at this retreat or at a church meeting or however it goes. But the biggest danger that we run into is ourselves because we can become so impressed with ourselves and what we know and how funny we are. and how encouraging we can be and how unbiased we can be sometimes towards people or even our honesty, or it just keeps going more and more and more and more and more. And so we get this big, big view of who we are and what we think we are. And before long, Ecclesiastes chapter four, verses nine through 12 becomes something that everybody else needs, but not me. And so I want to talk about the most. This is the most. Practically, practically speaking, outside of the blood of Jesus Christ, what he gives us, this is the most powerful weapon you have against sin. Write that down, please. If you want to know how to overcome sin in your life and you're born again right now, accountability is the most powerful weapon you have. But let me tell you what else it is. It's the most embarrassing weapon you have as well. It's the most embarrassing weapon you have as well. In a group of 80 some odd people, there's absolutely, in my mind, maybe I'm wrong, hopefully I'm wrong, but I don't think I am. I don't think that there's any way possible that there aren't some people sitting here today that are involved in relationships that you should not be involved in. you're involved in immoral activities that you shouldn't be involved in. That's just the truth. If not here, if we added a few more, that would be the case. There's no doubt that some folks have been on internet sites that you should have never been on, and it's a habit. There's no doubt that a lot of us use language and watch videos and listen to things that we have absolutely no business listening to. And the truth of the matter is, those of us that do that have absolutely no intention to change, even though some of us wish we would. You ever been there? I have, you know. You just find this area of your life that's a sinful area. You know, it's a sinful area. You're not too open about it because it's embarrassing. You wish you could change that area of your life. But really, the only way we're willing to give up that area is if God would give us that magic spiritual zap that we talked about earlier, where nobody has to know and I don't have to be humiliated and no one has to look down on me. And I can still continue to be the person who's most impressed with me because I'm the only one that knows and no one else has to know about it. Two things about accountability. Number one. Number one. You're going to need somebody to be accountable to somebody to be accountable to. It's one thing as a group of friends, and by the way, I think if you have a group of friends here, I think they could have a wonderful influence on your life if they are headed in a godly direction. But let me tell you what else I know. I also know that according to Proverbs 13 20, a companion of fools will be destroyed. I know that a companion of fools will be destroyed. What does that mean? That means a group of idiots don't become smart. That's what it means. A group of idiots don't automatically become smart. So if sometimes this was hard for us to hard for us to swallow. But, you know, in Proverbs, and some of you have said this to before you've heard it, but in Proverbs, there's a pretty good bit of that book that's that's dedicated to contrasting the wise man with the foolish man. And so it says the foolish man does this, the wise, this foolish, wise, foolish, wise, foolish, wise. And a lot of times we read that. And it just kind of rolls off our back and we don't think about it. But do you know whenever Solomon or really whenever God inspired that and he's talking about all the things that the foolish man does or the fool does, men and women, do you know who the fool is in Proverbs? It's you. It's you. It's me. We're the fools that Solomon spoke about. The fool that goes his own way and it ends up leading to destruction and death. I want you to know that outside of godly influence and God's influence in your life, you're that fool that falls headlong in destruction that says, you know what? I hear these guys saying all this stuff. I hear that that the fear of the Lord to fear God means to actually live. But what I said earlier, I've been living the life that You know, it might look like I'm serving God, but really I'm headed the opposite direction and I haven't found any consequences that I don't like yet. Well, that's the fool. And so we are fools. And the word that Brother Isaac spoke of, sanctification, what God does in a believer's life as he begins to make him look more like Christ, what God does as he does that, is to make us wise, to make us wise. And so the more wise you become, the more you look like Jesus Christ. But the more foolish you become, the further you fall into destruction and despair until you end up like Solomon that says, I hated life. I had all this stuff, all this stuff that was supposed to be so meaningful and fulfilling and all this, and it just amounted to absolutely nothing. Let me get into the second thing. So you got to have somebody to be accountable to and you don't need to pick a dummy to be your accountability partner. All right. Don't do that. So don't pick somebody your age. OK, not that everybody that's your age is a dummy, but they're not much smarter than you are. Pick somebody else. A pastor would be good. An older lady would be good. A mom, a dad. OK. The second thing is this. You listen. You have to make yourself accountable. So you need somebody to be accountable to, and then you have to make yourself accountable. That means you have to be willing to go through the embarrassment of going up to somebody that you trust that is a spiritual person and saying, hey, I'm really struggling with this. Can I talk to you about it? As I was thinking about this, and as I was talking to Timothy about it not too long ago, we were in the bathroom talking, and I was serious. Whatever I said earlier, this is the most powerful weapon you have against sin. And the reason I say that is because in my own life, it has been the most powerful weapon that I've had. I keep myself accountable to Isaac, even when it's embarrassing. And that has been one of Obviously, I'm you know, with the Holy Spirit and the blood of Christ and all the things that God gives us to overcome sin. Do you know what the first step in repentance is, anybody? If you're going to repent, what do you have to do? Confess, you've got to confess. And so a lot of times we try to. Get ourselves on the road to repentance. But our road to repentance looks like, OK, let me just hurry up and quit doing this and nobody has to know and then the embarrassment won't come later. But that's not repentance. Repentance is confession. And then after you confess. And you rend your heart before God. Then you begin to apply God's word to your situation and you pray that God will bless you as you try to turn and change your mind about that. But if you don't have confession, You don't have repentance. And if you don't have an accountability partner or you don't have somebody that you're comfortable to going to talk to about your sins, it's just not going to happen. It's just not going to happen. So here's the lie. Here's the lie that sin would would would lead you to believe. OK, and we all struggle with this. If they really knew. If they really knew, what would they think? If they really knew this about me, if I were to open up and really let them know that I really am this weird, what would they think? What would they think? I could never, ever bring myself to actually get those words out of my mouth and actually be able to tell somebody that this is what I have a hard time with. I could never, it would be so difficult, the burden would just be so heavy that I could never get it out. And I want to tell you something about both of those. They're lies. Oh, they would think I was just so strange, they'd probably kick me out of the church if they knew that's what I was having a hard time with. It's a lie. It's a lie. Let me tell you something else about you. Number one, nobody's as impressed with you as you are. And then number two, Listen, number two, if you're going to if you're going to learn to be accountable, you've got to be comfortable with this statement. Number two, you are a sinner who actually sins a lot of the time. OK, you are a sinner, you really are totally depraved. That's not there so we could spell tulip, that's there because you really are depraved, you struggle with some sick things. You struggle with some hard things. You struggle with some embarrassing things. And the reason you do is because you're a sinner. You're a sinner. Now, let me tell you the other thing. Christ died for sinners. Christ died for sinners. He died for all that embarrassing stuff you don't want anybody to know about. And can I tell you the truth? Can I be honest with you? Can I be open with you right now? Look up here. Can I be open with you? We've all got a bunch of embarrassing stuff. All of us. You hear me? All of us. It's not just you. It's not just you. Embarrassing stuff that we struggle with, embarrassing stuff that we've actually done, embarrassing stuff that we wish would just go away, but they won't go away. We all have that. But can I tell you the good news? Christ died for sinners. Christ died for sinners. And then can I tell you where the freedom comes? Well, number one, the freedom has to come in what I told you just a minute ago, it has to be a reality, a reality to you. And I like to put I like to say you have to be comfortable with the fact that you're a sinner, not comfortable with your sin, but comfortable with the fact that you're a sinner, because if you think that you're a Christian and you've been baptized and all of a sudden you're not supposed to have any more struggles or any more, any more hard spots or any more anything else. And all of a sudden you go from, you know, this little teensy tiny center that needed to be baptized. And now that you're baptized, you're getting it all right. That's not Christianity. I don't know what it is, but it's not Christianity. You've hit some other Eastern mystic religion that we didn't know anything about when we baptized you, and we may need to have a conference afterwards. So we're talking about real sinners, real people, real struggles, real embarrassments, but we're also talking about a real help. We're also talking about a real savior. We're talking about the blood of Jesus Christ that doesn't just make for a good sermon, but it actually helps people overcome their sin. It does. So the blessing of accountability, the blessing of accountability. So what about it? What about all those thoughts that you have? It's going to be so hard and people won't want to accept me and all this stuff. I'm going to go and tell you this. It's a lie. It's a lie. Let me qualify that statement. If you were to stand up right now and tell every single person the deepest thing that you struggle with, that's probably not a lie. Everybody would probably think, my goodness, you're a weirdo. That's probably right. But they would with all of us. But if you can find somebody that's spiritually mature. Somebody that you know is going to care for you and somebody that's not going to, you know, use your struggles for their own entertainment. But actually try to invest the time to help you and to keep you accountable and to be honest with you. Then you found a real blessing. Not only have you found a real blessing, but you found the place that God would have you to be if you are going to be shaped and changed into the image of Jesus Christ. Because here's the thing about that. I use this illustration a lot. Brother Claude, you and my father-in-law told me it and I just thought it was great. He said there was a a guy who made statues, and he had a big marble block, and he was going to make a horse. And so he walked around, he had his hammer and his chisel, and he put it down on the table, and he just kept walking around the slab, and he kept looking. And he would stop and look here, and stop and look there. And a guy came in to watch him, and all the guy was doing was walking around and looking. And the guy finally said, well, what are you going to do? And he says, well, I'm going to make a horse. And he says, well, how in the world are you going to make a horse out of that big block? And he says, I'm going to knock away everything that doesn't look like a horse. Listen, do you want to know how God makes you, turns you, mold you, changes you into the image of Jesus Christ? He knocks away everything off of you that doesn't look like Jesus Christ. And it's painful sometimes. But more than that, there's a lot of it. You've got a lot of baggage and so do I. And so there's a lot to be knocked off. So when we hear a verse like take up your cross daily and follow me or the whole idea that we ought to be repenting daily. And then we wake up at the first of the month and we can't remember the single time that we've repented the month before. There's we got some problems, right? We live in that solemn and delusion world sometimes to where we in our head, we we know something, but they never really actually make it out to our real lives. A lot of times we have all this stuff that we know down here, down here in our conscience, maybe even in our heart, but the majority of it has a really hard time making it up here to real life and the things that we actually do. You ever had that experience? Don't lie, I know you have. We all do. They have a hard time actually going from what we know to what we do. Could anybody tell me what the biggest hindrance is from going from here to here? And sometimes, let me put this in parentheses, sometimes it's just what we think we know. Sometimes we don't even have it all together and we won't admit that. What's our biggest hindrance in going from what we know, what we think we know, and what we actually do? Anybody got a guess? Any guess will do. I won't embarrass you. What people will think. What people will think. Somebody said pride. Who was that? Pride. Anybody else? I'm looking for another word even though those get the, that's exactly right. Say it again. Humbling ourselves. That's exactly right. What else? Something we all hate. We don't want to be humiliated or embarrassed. That's my word I'm looking for. We don't want to be embarrassed. So we can have this completely false idea about what we think we know. And we kind of scratch our heads about it and think, is this right? Is this wrong? But we don't want to look dumb, so we won't ask anybody. Or we might have an idea about things that we think ought to be going on or things that we really do know, real biblical knowledge. But then whenever we actually try to get it up here in our real life as to what we actually do, we never get there. Number one, we're too embarrassed to ask how that really works. And then number two, once we figure out how that works, we're too embarrassed to take that step because once again, sin would have us to believe that if we really revealed, if we really talked about those sinful struggles that we go through, nobody would understand because I'm the lone sinner and nobody's quite as weird as I am. And while we are all in some unique way, strange and weird, everybody has their issues that they deal with. Everybody has their issues that they deal with. So what does it mean to be a good friend? Let me go to Ephesians 4. Ephesians 4. Now, some of you are going to think this might sound a little cultic, but it's not. Your best friend ought to be in the church. Your best friend ought to be in the church. Ephesians chapter four, verse 14, it says that we henceforth be no more children tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine by slight of men and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie and wait to deceive. Here's really what I want in verse 15, how we ought to be communicating to each other, how we ought to be speaking to each other, says, but speak the truth in love. We may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ, from whom the whole body fitly joined together and compacted by that which every joint supply, according to the effectual working and the measure of every part, make an increase of the body under the edifying of itself. in love and really what the picture is that Paul's painting of the church and of unity is that we are speaking truth and love to each other and that the church members, the members of the body are actually edifying, building up itself in love. And so that we're ministering to each other, we're being honest with each other, we're being loving toward each other. We're actually involved with each other. We do more than a handshake and a smile and good to see you see you next week kind of a thing. We're actually involved. And so as you think about your friends, they ought to be people that you're actually involved in. But the two things that I want you to write down as far as accountability goes, if you want to be a true friend to your friend, you need to learn how to speak the truth in love, truth and love. Did you know that if you find somebody that can speak the truth to you and love, you found a pretty rare blessing? You know that? You know, we've got I've mentioned, I don't know if I mentioned it here or not, but I think I did earlier as I went through, I just graduated with a degree in counseling. And one thing that they all tell, well, it's just most of the counselors that you go to out there, their main goal is to make you feel good about you. You know that? You may not know that, but that's true. Their main goal is to make you feel good about you, even when you don't have a whole lot to feel good about in yourself. So, you know, how do you make a murderer feel good about being a murderer? Well, I don't know. I don't know how you do that. But how do you make somebody accept their self for who they are, even when what they've done and given themselves over to is just completely horrific? Well, I don't know. But here's what you need to learn to do what you're going to have to practice doing. I said earlier that you need to make yourself accountable and you need to do that with someone that is not your age, someone a little older, a little more spiritual than you are, but also want to encourage you as friends in your group of friends that you keep yourselves accountable to each other. And when you do that, you need to learn to speak the truth and love. So you've got to get the balance. A lot of people are off one way or the other. You know, you have, you have some people that just truth is what they're interested in. And so, you know, they say things like they're, they're just, you know, they just speak their mind or they're just always been blind or they just always did whatever they thought. And it's not very easy to take. And I'm trying to think of some examples, but I can't right now. And then you've got other people that are just loving and loving is I'm always there for you in the sense that I gave it. Oh, don't feel bad about that. You know, don't feel bad about that. You shouldn't feel bad about stealing that car or you shouldn't feel bad about stealing that man's wallet. It was right there. Good grief. If you kept it in his front pocket, you could never pick this pocket, right? Don't feel bad about that or however it goes. You just make all these excuses and you're just so loving towards somebody. But you need to be able to do both. You need to be able to do both, and it takes some boldness to do that. It takes really it takes love to do that. Do you remember the story when David? Had committed adultery with Bathsheba. And then he killed Uriah and then everything was going along and. Nathan came to him, anybody remember that story? I know you do. And he comes to him and he tells him the story about this man that was poor and he had this one little lamb and this other guy was rich and had a bunch of stuff, but he liked the other guy's little lamb, so he went and took it and slaughtered it for the feast. And David gets mad and he says, who is this guy? Who is this guy? I'm going to kill him. And what did Nathan say? You're the man. You're the man. Let me tell you something about that. It is not easy to look at somebody that you enjoy being around, someone whose approval you feel like you've already kept, already have, somebody that you really enjoy their company and all that, all the things that go along with that. It is not easy to look at someone and say, hey, that was wrong. You're the man. You shouldn't be talking that way. You shouldn't be doing this in this relationship that you're in. You really ought to think about this. You really shouldn't treat your parents that way. You really shouldn't listen to that garbage that you call music. You really shouldn't be doing this and this and this and this. Now, I'm not saying that you ought to be the friend patrol police that goes around and every little thing everybody does that you're, you know, you're trying to correct them. But what I am saying is, Do you remember what our verse said? That a fool does what's right in his own eyes and then that way leads to where? The Bahamas? No, it leads to destruction. It leads to destruction. So when you see your friend taking a path that leads to destruction, I want you to listen to me. Your God given responsibility is to go to that friend if you really love him and say you're the man. or you're the woman or whatever to sit down and talk to him. But listen, it's going to have to be truth and love. So you don't just go blast them. And that's, you know, at first it might be kind of difficult because you're nervous and you're jittery and you don't know what in the world you're going to say. And by the time your mouth opens up, you just spit it all out and you mess it up and you say, I'm never doing that again. Well, you'll learn how to do this truth and love thing, but you'll never learn to do it if you don't actually try. OK, so don't be afraid of messing up. You just keep your friends accountable, not because, again, You're the Bible sheriff, but because you see them headed into destruction. Happened with David and Nathan, Paul confronted Peter. This whole idea of confrontation is just. Almost absent in the world that we live in, because people ought to be able to do what they want to do, right? Right. How many would agree with that? People ought to be able to do whatever they want to do. Nobody's raising their hand, but to some extent we all agree with that. But I'm going to tell you that's just not the case. People should not be able to do what they want to do. Because what if they wanted to beat me up? I don't want them doing that, right? What if they wanted to have a bunch of children and not take care of them? What if they wanted to do that? Well, that's already happening, right? What if they wanted to do that? Well, one thing that happens. Is that a society begins to break down. And so I want to say this, just in case it's in your mind. An individual. Does not have the freedom to make choices that affect other people's freedoms. Do you hear me on that? You don't have the right to make a choice that's going to affect my own freedoms, possessions, whatever, my own God given rights, all that sort of thing. And when I say that, I'm not up here saying you owe me this, you owe me that and some prideful statement. But I am saying this, you are responsible and you are accountable for your own actions. I guess I can say it that way. Let me go to a couple of more and then I'm going to end in Proverbs chapter 27. Proverbs, Chapter 27. We'll start looking at a few things here. Proverbs, Chapter 27. I'm in verse 17. This is one that might be familiar to you. It says, iron sharpeneth iron. So a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friends. Iron sharpeneth iron, so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friends. And the whole idea there is that we ought to have kind of what we wrote over here. godly influences on our friends. Just as iron sharpens iron, the blade becomes sharper to do what it was intended to do. Just like that, we ought to be sharpening our friends, those that we come into contact with, so that they're able to be useful and able to serve the purpose that God has created them to do. And so I want you to ask yourself, are you sharpening your friends? Are you dulling the blade? Are you sharpening your friends or are you dulling the blade? And you say, well, you know, this thing, this is just so, you can't really ever tell, you know, you can't get real specific on this. It's kind of up or down, but the truth of the matter is it's not up or down. What kind of influence are you having on folks? Whenever they get around you, what's the theme? What are you communicating to folks? What's the idol that you have sitting on your heart that whenever somebody comes and they visit you and they're around you, what do they leave with? What are they thinking about? What songs are they humming in their head? What what movies have they just watched? What conversations have you just had? What's been so awesome that you've been talking about the whole time? What is it that you spend all your time and your friendship around? And whenever you can answer that, then you need to ask yourself, am I sharpening the blade or is it just becoming more and more dull the longer that we spend time together. Again, not something that we like to think about, but it's still a reality. Nonetheless, let's go say the same chapter there, Proverbs 27. Verse six. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful. If you have a tough time thinking that you might not ever be able to muster up enough courage to confront somebody because you just can't really see the benefit in it, I want you to think about Proverbs 27.6. Faithful are the wounds of a friend. You know what I did one time, not too long ago? I got up and I preached a message on modesty. It's not really something that we talk a whole lot about, but we do some. I thought it was about time for a good message on modesty. I thought I had just the perfect way to come and present that. Not too specific, but specific enough. I had just the right man. I had it just right. Until I got finished and walked out and I came up and said, don't ever say that again. And what I realized was the illustration that I used that I thought was so great actually had another meaning and I had no idea that the meaning was attached to it. And so so it was it was kind of embarrassing. But you know what he could have said, man, that was great. If you ever go visit somewhere, you ought to preach that message. That'd be wonderful. That would have been the kiss of an enemy. It really would, because what would have happened was I would have gone and I would have preached this message and I would have thought I was doing so good. And these guys would have thought I was just some weird pervert that couldn't come up with an illustration. I mean, they would just thought I was completely they would never ask me back. Faithful are the wounds of a friend. In other words, even when it hurts, if it's true, if it's true, If you've got somebody that's willing to come up to you and obviously that's kind of a funny example. I mean, I say funny sometimes we preachers can again, nobody thinks highly as we do about ourselves. So we can think we've really preached a wonderful message and then figure out we hadn't. But. And in real hurtful ways, people can come up and make us force us to face the reality that we've really messed up and that we really need to change and that we really need to repent. And when you find somebody that loves you enough to be uncomfortable enough to confront you with yourself, you found a good friend. Do you know who else who's who's part of their ministry is to convict you of your sins and to confront you with your sins? Anybody know of anybody in the Bible that does that? Any person in the Bible that their job, one of their main jobs is to convict you and to confront you with your sins? Say it again. Preachers. Who else? Somebody even better than preachers, if you could imagine that. Who? Say it again. Christ. I'm thinking of somebody else. Not better than Christ, but. Church. Holy Spirit, Holy Spirit, part of the Holy Spirit's ministry in your life is to convict you of your sin. In other words, he brings your sin up, puts it right in front of your face, and he makes you so uncomfortable with it that he leads you to repentance. And so if you're going to be a real friend, if you're going to confront people with the truth about themselves and point them to a direction that does not lead to destruction, then you're a good friend and you're acting in the same way that the Holy Spirit acts. I didn't make you the Holy Spirit. Don't get too puffed up about yourself, but you are doing a good thing. Let me go one more. And this is in. Let me see, I don't want to hit that one. OK, we've talked about confrontation, Jonathan and David, we've talked about the helpfulness and the power that there is, and being able to find someone that you can confess your sin to. By the way, James chapter 5, verse 16 says that we ought to be confessing our faults one to another. Who was at the meeting? Memphis meeting. Grace Chapel meeting. Yeah. Y'all remember, I don't remember when this was, but one of his messages, Brother Jamie Tucker was talking about sometimes how we get, somebody comes up and they say that, you know, what can I pray for you about? Y'all remember that when he was talking about that? Yes, no, maybe so. Y'all remember that? Yeah. And we get kind of, we cringe a little bit, right? And what he said was exactly right. Who, me? Pray for me? No, I don't need any prayers. I don't need you to pray for me. Why? Do you hear something weird? Do you hear something about me? Do you hear what you hear? What's the rumor going around? Here's one thing, and he's not original with this, but here's one thing that my father-in-law says all the time, Brother Claude Ewing. He says, it does not bother me. Now, this part may not be completely true, but since it's for the quote, I'll take it at face value. It does not bother me when people talk bad about me because the truth is they don't know the half of it. They don't know the half of it. I'm way worse than they think I am. I've got a whole lot more stuff going on than they think I do. And that's really the reality in all of our lives. But the hard thing is to get to the point when somebody comes up and it's not just when can I pray for you, but whenever we are convicted, whenever we are burdened over our sin, the hard part is actually coming out and letting somebody know that you're not a righteous robot, but you actually are a human sinner. That's the hard part. And so this is what I want to encourage you to do. Number one, I want to encourage you to keep yourself accountable to somebody. That's number one on the list, if you want to know It's just about 3.40. So whenever this ends, it'll probably be 3.50, 4 o'clock. If you want to know what you can do to spiritually grow in the next 10 minutes, think about somebody you can keep yourself accountable to. Okay? There's nothing mystical or fuzzy about that. You think about somebody that you trust, that's spiritual, somebody that will help you, a pastor, a parent, family member, a spiritual mentor, that you can keep yourself accountable to. And then number two, don't believe sin's lies. Yeah, it's embarrassing, but we all have embarrassing stuff. And so find somebody you can be open with and actually go be open with them. And then the next thing, if you're going to be a friend to somebody, if you're going to be a friend to somebody, if you've got a group of friends and you're going to be a friend to them, you keep them accountable. You learn to speak the truth in love. You love them enough to be uncomfortable. And even if you don't love them, you love God enough to be uncomfortable. If you've got a fault with somebody, you go talk to them about it. You know that most of the things that happen, not just in a church, but just in a group of folks at school, as a teacher, there's a lot of things that go on in offices. There's a lot of things that go on and a lot of bickering and a lot of nagging, a lot of this, a lot of that. And do you know what most of that is comprised of? Well, same stuff you guys have going on, a bunch of little stupid, petty stuff. Because people are too scared to go say something to somebody that has offended them and half the time they got the story wrong or somebody told it wrong or they didn't hear the right thing or they stepped in halfway through and made it into something it was never supposed to be. If you can at an early age learn to go and talk to someone who has offended you or who you think might have offended you. You are saving yourself a ton of heartache, and burden and weight that you don't have to carry around. If you think it's hard now, well, I better not say it this way. I was going to say, wait till you get married, but that sounds bad. If you think it's difficult to confront your friend and you're trying to make yourself and keep yourself in a place to where you're trying to prepare yourself to be a good husband or to be a good wife, I'm telling you, if you're in the habit of sweeping everything under the rug, you will be an awful husband or wife. You will. I promise you will. If you don't love folks enough now to be able to confront them with the things that bother you about them in a biblical way, you will be an awful husband and wife. And by the way, we've got a lot of awful husband and wives out there and we all fit that category at some point because we're just too, when we get down to it, wimpy to talk to people about stuff that they've done that has offended us. So if you want to know what it means, at least in one area, what it means to grow spiritually, you keep yourself accountable. You refuse to be embarrassed about your sins because you're a sinner and Christ came and died for sinners and you don't do things in order to be accepted, but you're already accepted. So since Christ already loves you and since he's already died for you and he's already broke the bondage of sin that you had over your life. Well, you throw your hands up and say, I don't care what everybody else thinks. Now, listen, you're thinking, that's a pipe dream. That's a pipe dream. There's nobody out there that's unaffected by what people think about them. Well, maybe. But maybe not. Listen, I tell some pretty embarrassing things to my wife and to Isaac. And a lot of times, my wife doesn't take it all that great. They don't take it all that well. It just doesn't happen. Matter of fact, she's a lot more embarrassed about a lot of things about me than I am. But you know what? This is this is God's honest truth. You know what has has has blessed me to continue to try. I'm not perfect, but I try my best to force myself to be completely honest with those two people. And the reason is. Whatever the reactions are. I really am accepted by Christ, I really can't talk to him, I really can't say, Lord, you know what, this did not turn out at all like I thought it would turn out. But I'm accepted by you. And that sure does make salvation a whole lot more sweeter to know that even though I could embarrass myself and others, you're not embarrassed by me because you knew this about me long before I mustered up the courage to let somebody else know. If you want to know what it looks like for the gospel to really work its way out in your life, you've got to humble yourself. You've got to refuse to be embarrassed or at least refuse to be hindered. in obedience to God by your own embarrassment over your sins. And make yourself accountable to somebody.