All right, so what we do on Saturdays is we've gone, we sort of just go through a book, like I just pick out a book and we walk through it until we finish it. And I think the first one we did was The Complete Husband by Lou Priolo that took us many years, feels like. It took a long time. But this year, I think we started this in January, we've been doing this and we're almost finished with it, Finally Free by Heath Lambert. and fighting for purity with the power of grace. And I'm going to try to cover two chapters this morning, and then next time we do this, we'll finish the book. And so just to go through the review here, we talked about fighting sexual sin or pornography with God's grace, looked at Romans 3, 21 through 25. We talked about godly sorrow from 2 Corinthians 7, 8 through 11. We talked about fighting it with biblical accountability in Galatians 6, 1 and 2. We talked about radical measures in Matthew 5, 27 through 30. Confession from Proverbs 28. And then last time we talked about using your marriage or singleness, and we looked at the strange woman in Proverbs 5. And the key principle was direct your mental. and physical energies away from porn or sexual sin and toward the purity of marriage and the Savior to whom marriage points. So, the last three chapters of this is the subjects of humility, gratitude, and the dynamic relationship with Jesus. So we're going to talk about humility and gratitude this morning, okay? So if you have Bibles or have the Bible on your phone, turn with me to James chapter 3, James chapter number 3. There's definitely, I think whenever you think about the passage of Scripture on the subject of humility, Philippians 2 is probably going to be the one that you think of, is definitely the best one, where it talks about the humility of Christ, and I have this mind in you, which is also in Christ Jesus. But it's not the only one. It's not the only passage. In James 3, after he talks about the mouth, in verse 13 says, who is wise and understanding among you? There you go, Spencer. He's talking about wanting wisdom. He asked that question, who is wise in understanding among you? So he does link understanding, some knowledge there with wisdom. Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy, and self-seeking in your hearts," I think ESV says selfish ambition, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. I love the specificity of the Word of God there, like interesting that he would say that. Verse 16, where envy and self-seeking or selfish ambition exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. Okay? So, first of all, using humility in your fight, if you look at, this is what he says, if you look at porn or if you go to sexual sin, you are arrogant. You are arrogant. And we probably don't think about that in this subject. And let me remind you, too, that we're also talking about this in the concept of me trying to train you men to also help other guys. So, if you have somebody coming to you and they're saying, I'm struggling with this, maybe the first thing that comes to your mind is that they're not just an arrogant fool or arrogant pride is there. Because you're probably looking at somebody that's like, man, they just, they actually, they want help. And Lambert says, the choice is simple and clear. you can look at porn or you can be humble. You cannot do both. And then he gives three things to consider. So, I'm going to turn over to Titus, the book of Titus chapter number three. So, the first one is consider salvation. Consider salvation. Titus chapter three. He says to consider salvation and trying to fight this with humility. Here's the thing. Why is this so arrogant and why is it a difference between humility? All right. Well, if God. And he is the all wise God. He's the creator and he has the authority if he has said this is wrong. then every single time that we do something that He has said is wrong, what are we then, in a sense, saying? Yeah. Yeah, we, you, no, I'm going to do what I want to do, not humble myself and obey. So, that's where it is. So, he says, consider salvation, verse 3 of Titus 3, for this one has been counted worthy of much more glory than Moses, as much as he who built the house has more honor than the house. For every house is built by someone, but he who built all things is God. He has the authority. And Moses indeed was faithful in all his house as a servant. for a testimony of those things which would be spoken afterward. But Christ as a Son over His own house, whose house we are if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm to the end. Therefore, as the Holy Spirit says, today you will hear His voice." And so we see there the doctrine or the truth of the authority in Christ, in salvation, that we don't look to Moses, we don't look to the law to save us. Christ has authority over Moses. He has authority over the law. And so we are now in Christ with the gospel, the good news, so we consider salvation. If we are saved, if we are brought into Christ, what is that song we sing? I am not my own." Yeah. So, if you belong to someone else, then that someone else then has authority over what you do. Next one he says to consider is consider sin. Men who struggle with pornography or sexual sin often see it as their only sin. And so whenever they go to confess, the confession tends to be, like I'm talking about confession with God, it tends to be that's the only thing that they're confessing. It blinds them, not just to that sin, but it also blinds them to the fact that there's other sins coming out in them. There's other problems there because that seems like the big thing and so like they think that it's the only one they're doing, but there's other sins that are actually coming out and they're missing it. They're not seeing those sins. If you want to cut, Heath Lambert says, if you want to cut the root, of sexual sin or porn with the acts of humility, you must consider the other sins in your life as well. This is why we go to the idols of the heart and ask these questions. What is it that you're willing to sin to get? What is it that if you don't get, you're willing to sin? What is it that you tend to run to for your refuge, for comfort? If these things sort of seem like they're getting threatened, what brings out that anger, that temper, that sinful reaction towards others? And then you'll start getting to the root of where that idol in your heart is, and you see that it's a seedbed for all kinds of different sins that are coming out. So consider salvation, consider sin, and then lastly here in this point, consider service. True repentance means replacing porn with something else, something that honors God and demonstrates love to others. This is really a thing that I talk with many people on, whether it's anxiety, whether it's depression, whether it's sexual sin like this. You know, a lot of times if there's sorrow there, if there's brokenness, and we're working towards the thing, a danger can be that they become so self-focused or, what's the word I'm looking for, self-deprecating. Yeah, introspective, but just like, I'm terrible, I'm terrible, I'm terrible. Okay, yeah, we get that. We get the truth of our corruption and our sin from Scripture, but that's not going to be helpful. You need to go out and serve somebody. You need to go out and serve the church. You need to do something to serve somebody else. Get your mind and your eyes off of yourself. I mentioned this Sunday and I thought about this. I was using it as a bookmark here so I wouldn't forget it to bring it. But I had these sitting out here for a while. I got a stack of them at the church, but this was this thing that Jim Neuheiser put down. And he talks about seven traits of worldly sorrow on one side, and then seven traits of true repentance on the other. And he has scripture verses that goes with each one to point out where you see these things in scripture with people. So, the seven traits of worldly sorrow, all right, think about this in the concept of humility in the fight against this. The first one, he points out, is self-focused. Me, me, me, me, me. Self-focused. Genesis 4.13 and 1 Samuel 15.30 are the two passages that he points to. Number two, hates the consequences of sin. Hates the consequences of sin. Why is that a trait of worldly sorrow and not true repentance? Again, where's the humility? you know, what is the problem of the consequences of the sin? Well, the consequences of sin comes directly on us. It comes directly on me, the one who sinned. And therefore, I'm not saying that we like, oh yeah, we love the consequences of sin. That's not the thing. It's a brokenness of, but this sort of, um, Well, and not like an attack, like I'm I'm feeling attacked. I don't I don't like I shouldn't have to go through this. I remember when my when my brother went to prison. So he sat in county jail for a year. And then after his sentencing, he went to a state prison, maximum security prison. And the first time I went to visit him there, he said, I think I might have mentioned this before, but he said, do you think that I should still be in jail? He'd only been in a year. He said, do you think I should still be in jail? And I said, uh, I gave him a long answer, but I said, yeah, I do. I absolutely do. And he was like, oh, okay. And he acted offended. His thing was, if God has, if I've repented, then I should be out of jail trying to put my family back together instead of what? facing the consequences of your sin and being totally accepting of that. But he hated the consequences of his sin. So that was worldly sorrow. Number three he has on here is unchanged heart that produces no fruit. There's no fruit of repentance because there hasn't been a change in the heart. And he points to Luke 7 through 9. The next one is impatiently demands trust and restoration. Impatiently demands trust and restoration. I don't understand why, how long is this going to go on? Arguments like, how long are we going to keep bringing this up? and patiently demands trust and restoration. The next one is self-protective, Genesis 4.14 and 1 Samuel 15.30, self-protective. And then the last one, of course, we see this in the garden, Genesis 3.12, 1 Samuel 15.19-24, and all the passages alluding to 1 Samuel 15, I think, is a character study on King Saul. You know, King Saul many times was like, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but it wasn't true repentance, it was worldly sorrow. And the last one is blames others. Blames others, right? So this is the seven traits of true repentance. God-focused. Psalm 51, 4a. What does that say? Against you and you alone have I sinned. 2 Samuel 12, 13. The second one is hates the sin. hates the sin. Now this is inevitably, when I'm working with a guy like this, that's struggling with something like this, inevitably we have to come to this point. And this is the reason why. Because if you are broken over what your sin is, then it's real easy to get into a spiral of just going to, I've messed up, and I messed up, and I messed up, and then it's real tempting and easy in our flesh to start saying, I hate me. I hate me. And that's not what scripture and the gospel calls us to do. All right? Number one, yes, you sinned. Yes, you are, you know, God's still sanctifying you, but you are in God's image. You don't have the right to hate yourself. A form of arrogance. Yep. Yep. And yep. Yeah, so to correct the direction of hatred, and so what I work with them is like, okay, so I'm not going to correct your hatred. It's the direction of your hatred that needs correction, not hatred towards yourself. Hatred towards the sin. Hate the sin. Hate the sin. Submits, the next one is, submits to discipline and accountability. Absolutely, whatever I have to do, whatever accountability. You know, another thing, when I'm working with guys on this, I'm like, okay. I give them a week. I say, when I see you next week, there should be accountability software and I want you to explain to me who's got access to that. If they don't come in in the next week and that is done. then I'm sort of like, all right, are we going to continue meeting? Like, here's the deal. Be on that. Are you going to submit to discipline and accountability? Are you actually going to be vigilant? Because you may not know where to go. You may not know the direction. But if I say, all right, I'm going to give you the tools, and you're going to be lax on putting those tools in place? That doesn't look like true repentance. Are you submitting to discipline and accountability? The next one is a changed heart that produces fruit. So, therefore, if the heart has been changed, you will see this fruit of repentance. Psalm 51, 6-12, Luke 19, 1-10. The next one is patiently accepts consequences. And this is sort of a journey. You recognize, like David did, the consequences are not going to be always immediate. There may be immediate consequences, right? What was one of David's immediate consequences? You remember this? Yeah, the baby died. But David had to come to terms with the long-term consequences. And boy, were there long-term consequences. Civil war, rebellion in the home, sin in the home, rape of, you know, an incestuous situation with siblings. and led to more sin on his part and inaction. So, he had to come to terms with the consequences. Fully accepts responsibility, Psalm 51.3, 2 Samuel 24.10, not making excuses. And then lastly, concern for others, 2 Samuel 24.17 and Philippians 2.3-4. See, when it comes to true repentance in this matter, In my view, from what I understand of Scripture, you cannot have true repentance and then humility comes. True repentance and humility are intertwined. You can't separate the two. So, that's humility. Next one is using gratitude. So, turn over with me to Ephesians 5. Ephesians 5, 3-4, but fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you as is fitting for saints, neither filthiness, nor foolish talking, nor coarse jesting, which are fitting." All right, so you get all of these sins starting with sexual sin, and that sexual sin leads to uncleanness, covetousness, so discontent, wanting more than what you have, lust. Let it not even be named among you." Verse 4, filthiness, perverted heart leads to perverted talking, coarse chesting, but rather what? Instead of all these things, don't do these things instead. Give thanks. It's like, I didn't see that one coming. Like, I would have thought so many different things, but the Holy Spirit said, now the antidote to this is thanksgiving. It's gratitude. The importance of gratitude in the fight. Number one, God forbids actions that are obviously sexually immoral. That's what we just saw in verses three and mostly four. Number two, God forbids any kind of impurity. And number three, God forbids, greed. Greed has to do with covetousness, sinful desire, and evil lusts. All right? So, this is where we talked about like what's going on in the heart and not seeing the only sin, because if you're giving in to these sinful passions, other sins are going to come out. All right? And most likely, that's going to come in the form of greed, wantonness, lust, It's the opposite of gratitude. Greed perverts desire and degree when you want a good thing too much. You want a good thing too much. I'll move on from that. Greed perverts desire and direction when you want things you shouldn't want or you want to satisfy your desire in the wrong way. The logic of lust requires you to be discontent with what you have and pay attention to all the things you don't have. Is that not our culture? The logic of lust requires you to be discontent with what you have and pay attention to all the things you don't have. I wish I had this. I wish I had this. Why don't I don't have this? I look at everybody else in the church and I say, this is going this way for them. This is going this way for them, but I don't have it. Yep. And yeah, all of that is arrogance. It's all pride. The logic of thankfulness requires you to focus on what you have already received and to be overcome with thanks. Gratitude is the opposite of greed. we get self-focused. We get self-focused. I mean, you think about, let's think about, you know, the Psalm 23. The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not lack anything. And when you think about our lives, and the times, like even one time, maybe in a week, where you're like, I wish this. But then you stop and think about how much you have more than what you actually need. He's provided your needs, and you have an abundance, and yet we still find things to wish. I wish I had this, or sort of be this. It's like, wow. So learning to be thankful, defeating porn requires grateful consideration of God's good gifts to you. He has given you good gifts. And then the result of gratitude is gladness. To learn to delight in God above all else, but as we have seen, the Bible gives us another significant strategy in this fight to be grateful. Greedy lust undercuts gladness while gratitude produces it. Lust guarantees that as soon as you possess the object of your longing, you will get a new greedy desire for something more. It's never satisfied. It's never satisfied. It keeps wanting more, keeps wanting more. And what does gratitude cultivate? Gratitude, yeah, cultivates contentment. Peace. Brother Steve, one day I may just email him and say, give me your notes from that message. Because we liked it so much, we asked him to preach it. He did it more than once because we asked him to. But he did a message one time during Thanksgiving on gratitude and the benefits of gratitude. And he talked about like this, but he also walked through. like he did research on these different studies that they've done on like all of the physical aspects of thankfulness and gratitude and like how even it is actually beneficial for your physical health and like all of these statistics that he pointed out it was like all right people that are more thankful actually have more likelihood it was like it's absolutely amazing like the the benefit of just thankfulness and gratitude is like it It is powerful in our lives, powerful. And why I actually say that the most powerful weapon in the fight against sexual sin is gratitude. So, one of the things that I do is I normally have guys make a thankful list. I say, alright, you're going to make a list, and I want you to write down the things that you're thankful for. And normally that grows. It grows and grows because you start thinking about it and then more things come to mind. And the more God begins to sanctify your mind and heart, more things come to mind, more things come to mind. And what I do is I have them, I try to get them to do this, but write it in such a way, whether it's on their phone or whether it's like something to where they can fold it up and keep it on their person. They put it in their wallet, put it in whatever. And that way, whenever they are struggling with temptation, I tell them or they like, for instance, if they were to call you and say, I'm struggling. One of the first things I would do is say, pull out that list. Pull out that list. Start thinking about how good God's been to you. Start thinking about how thankful, how grateful you are to Him. Ben, is one of the songs we're singing tomorrow, Great is Thy Faithfulness, is that on the list? Yeah. So, Great is Thy Faithfulness is what we're singing tomorrow. Now, I think it'll be a blessing to everybody, but for you guys, after thinking on these things, what a hymn that hymn is. Great is Thy Faithfulness. and the words to that hymn. You know, we've got people in here that have been through cancer and many, many health problems. And I think that sitting down with somebody that has white hair, a saint that has gray or white hair that has been through a lot of life and a lot of trials, and then asking them some questions of like, hey, can you tell me where's God been faithful? Now, that's not everybody that I know. We've had some people, I had a church member that was almost in their 70s, super bitter. Like, not everybody's like that, right? You think about just listening to someone else's perspective who's lived a lot more years than you have, and listen to them how they recounted, or they can recount, how God was there here. God brought this here. God did this in the outcome. It was so hard, but looking back on it, we see how God did this. I'm telling you, it strengthens your faith. It strengthens your faith. You know, so humility and gratitude, humility and gratitude. And then the last one we'll cover next time is using a dynamic relationship with Jesus. Let's pray. Father, thank you for this time together. Thank you for these men. We thank you for your word and we pray that you will continue to humble us. And we pray that you will continue to draw us in closer to you and help us to focus in on your character and you. And so that breeds more thankfulness in our hearts. And as we give you Thanksgiving, not just one time a year, but every day. We love you and give you praise in Jesus' name. Amen.