All right. Let's look in our Bibles tonight. And I plan on this being the last message on this particular subject. We've been looking at the family. And of course, you can write books on this. And I've mentioned before, I have a book in my library, and I haven't really used it too much, honestly, in preparation for this. I've read some of it before. A lot of that I use for resource. It's a thick book, and it's got just all kinds of messages and articles written in the past by Baptists and otherwise, but preachers and writing on different areas, different aspects of of the family. It's such an important subject and so many things that we need to consider in relationship to our families, how we do things, and keep in mind what we're trying to produce for the glory of God. Let's read tonight in our Bibles. I'm going to start with just one verse, Proverbs chapter 1 and verse 8. Proverbs chapter one and verse eight. Hear my son the instruction of thy father and forsake not the law of thy mother. Let's look to the Lord in prayer. Heavenly fathers, we begin to look into your word tonight and consider the subject that's before us and realize how important it is, especially in this day in which we live, Lord, we pray that you'd help us tonight to understand what your word teaches and the examples that have been set for us in the word of God. And Lord, I pray that you'd help us to understand how that we can apply them to our own lives in the direction of your Holy Spirit. Help us to have a teaching heart and mind for the truth of your word. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. I want to speak tonight on the subject of raising young men and women. And what I mean by that, I've got the whole title down that I want to deal with. What I'm really trying to say is raising young men and women to be young men and women. That seems like almost redundant, but it's not redundant in the society that we live in. You have to be sure you clarify what you're trying to do. what God would have us to do. And God would have us to raise our young men to be men and our young women to be women. And there's only one way that you can, there's only one thing that you can have, if you will, to start with, to have a man, and that's a boy. And there's only one way that you can come up with a woman, and that's with a girl. That seems kind of ridiculous to have to say that, but that's the state of our society. And when we look at things like this, we have to stop and think, how did we get here? Now, I know that the Bible teaches that it's going to be like this in the last days. I know the Bible teaches that. But we always have to stop and consider When we're looking at things, how did we get here? And how are we supposed to recognize? How are we to recognize what God expects us to be? In other words, I don't think there's anybody here tonight that has a problem with the fact of what I just stated, that boys are supposed to grow up to be men and girls are supposed to grow up to be women. I don't think anybody's got a problem with that. We just say that. But what does that mean? And I'm not going to spend the whole time trying to deal with both. We do have to stop and consider the fact that, first of all, it hasn't always been this way. Even if we have to go back quite a ways, to find some examples of people that have written about how it's supposed to be. And I don't think we necessarily do. There are other people today that recognize it as well. But sometimes when you talk about what the Bible really says and try to get it down where the rubber meets the road, people in our society, and I'm talking about religious people in our society, and even in a lot of our churches will choke on some of the things I'm going to try to say tonight. I'm not trying to make anybody choke. I just want us to recognize what the Word of God actually says and challenge ourselves. Do I really want to be what I'm supposed to be and try to raise my children to be what God would have them to be. In Ephesians chapter 6, I want to remind you of two verses in Ephesians chapter 6. Verse 1 says, and before I read this I want to point out the fact that it again says, the instruction of thy father, and then it says, and the law of thy mother. So where does it start? Well, it starts with the father, not just in the order that it's given in the text, but what the meaning is. The instruction starts with the father. That means the father is the one who lays out how it's going to be with the child. In other words, it comes back, it always comes back, it starts with a dad that's subject to the Word of God, subject to God, and then it goes from there in the family. That's the way God ordained it. We can go back to Genesis and spend a bunch of time there. I don't think we should have to do that tonight with those of us that are here. I don't think I have to do that. If I do, be sure and let me know because I'd be glad to do it. But the Word of God is clear from the book of Genesis all the way through the Word of God. In the home, and then our churches. So it starts with the father. It doesn't start with, well, what does your mom think? I'm not saying that, dads, that we shouldn't ask the child once in a while, well, what did your mom say? It's a good chance they went and asked her, too. But the fact of the matter is, I see so many homes today, I talk to so many dads, Christian people, that have this order backwards. It's not, what does the husband think? It's, he always says, well, whatever you think. And I'm serious about that. The man's response seems to always be, well, what do you think? And to the children, it's, well, Let me check with your mom about that. It's not starting with the dad. The dads are not being the man of the house. To put it just very plainly, the men are not being the man of the house. I want to make something very clear tonight. I'll say more about this, but this does not mean, I want to get this out of the way to begin with, this does not mean that the man of the house is a dictator. Because that's not what God outlines in the Word of God. But he is totally responsible for the standard that's upheld and what is done in the home. He's responsible before God. Now, Ephesians 6.1 says, Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." And then it says in chapter 6 and verse 4, it says, "...and ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath, but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." It's not just interesting, it's important to note. He doesn't say Ye parents. He said something about the parents first. Children, obey your parents. That means mom has some authority over the children. But ultimately, it comes down to this. Ye fathers. Ye fathers, bring them up in the nurture and adoration of the Lord. The father of the home is responsible for what the children are taught, their instruction. I didn't say he has to do it all, because he also has to make a living. But I look at my children and I did as they were coming up, and whatever they were getting, I was responsible. That means if I needed to I needed to know what they were getting so I could address it if I needed to. There's an attitude that we have adopted in our culture in America and I was going to address this and then I've had, I can't tell you how many times I've heard somebody say something like this in the last couple of weeks. Maybe, well, further back than that even. It just keeps coming up all the time. Well, you know, I've just thought that, you know, we could just send the kids to school and trust the school. Well, that obviously hasn't worked very well over the last 60 years or more. It never will work well. I don't care where you send them to school. It never will work well. That's not going to work out well because it's disobedient. It's abdicating your responsibility, fathers. You're neglecting your responsibility. It's never going to turn out well, and it hasn't turned out well. We've come to the place where society, I could, you know, any institution practically in our society, no longer even recognizes that your children are yours. We have people in control of our government right now, taking more control than is theirs, that don't believe your children are yours. They believe they're theirs. And I'm not just talking about Washington, D.C. I'm talking about at every level. They believe your children belong to them. Now, there was a common thought in Israel, and it was biblical. It started with God dealing with Abraham and the way he did, what God said about him and to him, and we've talked about that before. It was true in early America, especially with those who believed the word of God. I don't know that John Locke was a Christian. I doubt that he was. He's known more as a philosopher, but he was an Anglican, and his parents, I don't know if they actually joined, but if they taught, they at least considered leaving the Anglican church and becoming Puritans. But at any rate, so he had that kind of a quote-unquote Christian background. And one of the things he wrote was some thoughts concerning education. This is in 1693. Now this is, I'm just using him as one example, and it's not a quote. but it's close. But he argued for the education of young gentlemen to be tutored by men both in exercise and in their study. He believes strongly that young men should be tutored, should be taught by men. You say, well, that's crazy, that's weird. Actually, it didn't used to be weird at all. Actually, it was normal. Some of the people that, you know, your Webster's Dictionary was written by a teacher. He wrote a lot of other things too while he was teaching. He wrote a lot of other things by hand. He didn't have AI to help him like people do today. Tremendous minds, well-educated. They also knew how to do hard work. And what John Locke is saying is that young men need to be taught by men both in exercise, they didn't believe in lazy young men, in exercise and study, both. I mentioned, talked last week about integrating subjects. Well, they believed and it all goes together. In other words, it's all about life. It's all about life. What does the Bible teach? That's his idea. He had a Christian background and, you know, as far as he was raised that way is what we would call a Christian background. Like I said, I don't know if he's a saved man or not. But first of all, I want you to recognize tonight, and this is the main thing I want to consider tonight, we have to remember the goal. If we're going to bring up young men to be men and young women to be women, we have to keep our eye on the goal. What is the goal? It's to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. It's to teach them, to train them, more than just teach them. We take that as, you know, that's what goes in the brain. No, to train them in all the areas that are necessary for them to become a young man. I've known people that have, you know, a two-year-old. They're five years old, whatever it is. And they like them like they are. They like them being little kids. Well, enjoy them while you can, but they're supposed to grow up. From the time they come into the world, our goal is not just to deal with them at the age they are now. That's what most people do. Well, that's what they're at now and I'll deal with that. No, if we're going to do anything and do it well, we have to know where we're headed and then have a process of getting there. Set some goals. How do we get from here to here? But we don't have to know where we're headed. This is tremendously lacking in our society because we have a society and it includes everything. It includes everything from what your children are exposed to in little kids' videos, children's cartoons, animated movies. I don't want to get on a sidetrack tonight. I was going to say something. I'm not going to get sidetracked. To just what our whole world thinks and is teaching young people today. It's an opposition. You hear this, if you're listening, you hear this all the time. There's a concerted denial that men should be masculine. The world does not want our young men to grow up to be masculine men. God does. God wants your young men, my young men, my grandchildren that are boys, to grow up to be men and the young ladies to grow up to be women. Yes, God teaches that men and women have different roles. God's not. Make any apologies for that. I had some stuff I was going to do. I'm not going to have time to get some of this. But I'll just mention that in a general way like I did as far as what's out there and the pressure and all the impressions that are left. Say, oh, the videos are just there. They're just cartoons. Nobody takes that seriously. Listen. Everything has, that the eye sees, has a message. When you have a cartoon video, I don't know if you know who this is or not. I almost hope nobody even knows who I'm talking about or what I'm talking about. Maybe you do. Like Blue. I mean, that's a real thing. Wow, is that a real thing? Yeah. It's about I can't remember what the dog is now, some kind of dog. You know, and then the dog has a sister and they have a dad. And the dad's the one that deals with them all the time and actually, you know, the dad acts like a mother. The dad is the mother to them. Even though it's a male dog, it's the mother to them. You think kids aren't affected by that impression? If you do, you don't know anything about raising children. Children are impressionable. There's a reason we say that. Children are impressionable. Of course they're impressed by that. It's being impressed upon their minds. And that so-called male dog, has motherly attributes that might be okay. I haven't watched any of it. Now, if that's what they should be, well, that would be great on a mom, but it's not good on a man. And I don't want my grandchildren. My boys are a little bit too big for this. I don't want my grandchildren raised watching that. wicked stupidity. Because it is. I want them and the girls to understand that the boys are supposed to be men and act like men. And it's not okay to have the characteristics of a woman. I'm talking about even emotional characteristics, motherly traits. Fathers are not motherly. Mothers are motherly, fathers are fatherly. Now there is a difference, you understand. There's a huge difference in those two things. God instituted both. We cannot be passive anymore. For years, it's disturbed me. How passive Christians have become. And I'm talking about, you know, unfortunately, the sovereignty of God gets blamed for it. Well, you know, God knows all about it and He knows what's going on, so we don't do anything. I believe in a sovereign God that holds men responsible. We cannot go on being passive. We're losing out. It's affecting our children and it's affecting our churches and our families. I'm not here to try to change the world. I'm here to be the salt of the earth. Motherly traits are wonderful and they're admirable on a mother. And I mean that. They're wonderful traits. They're admirable traits. I never wanted my girls to have fatherly traits. Why would I want my boys to have motherly traits? I don't. But moreover, God doesn't want that. Now the Bible, it uses some things about mothers and it's exalting because, listen to this, the degree of affection, when God speaks of the degree of the affection that God has, He speaks of a mother. Psalm 35, 14, I bowed down heavily as one that mourneth for his mother. Now this is a man, David, that's talking. And when he wants to use, by inspiration, when he just wants to talk about the extent of his affection and his mourning, it's like mourning for his mother. When the Bible talks about the comfort of God, it's Isaiah 66 and verse 13. It's likened unto a mother, not because God is a mother, but that's what we have, we relate to, and we recognize it's the greatest that there is as far as man is concerned. So it's likened to that as, it's not what he is, but as, as one whom his mother comforted, so will I comfort you. His mother. It's talking about a man being comforted by his mom. by his mother, as one whom his mother comforted. So will I comfort you, and you shall be comforted in Jerusalem. It's talking about a special comfort. Those things are extremely admirable. It's wonderful to have a mother that sympathizes and empathizes with us. But there's a place for the other side of that coin. And somebody's got to be that other side of the coin. Not that a father can't, doesn't sympathize, the Bible speaks of that too, pitying your children as a father pities his children. But the education in the Word of God, Old Testament and New Testament, the education was placed absolutely in the hands of the Father. Right there. It's in the hands of the Father. The goal was for training to be serious. In other words, when you look at Israel's history and the way they looked at it, and the way it was in the early days of our nation, then before that, I'm just saying in our nation, this is the way it used to be, too. But you've got to go a long ways back. But education was looked at especially training young men. It was serious. And there was accountability. In other words, a young boy doesn't need an education, especially when he gets into his teen years, does not need to be cobbled by his mom. He needs a man that will be strict, say it like it is, say it like a man, and mean what he says. Say what he means and mean what he says. And if it's not done right, there's going to be some accountability. That's what young men need. That's what they need. Because if they're going to be men, they have to learn to be accountable. To be the guy that feels like, like one president said that I don't really like, but anyway, you know, the buck stops here. That they just embrace that. Whatever happens here, it's on me. Take responsibility. Be accountable. It's nice, let me just say this, it's nice to have help from my wife sometimes in things I do, but I don't hold her accountable to do what's my responsibility. And I don't believe men should shove off on their wife or expect their wife to do something that they're not physically in a position to do right now. I do that. It's the man's responsibility. I also understand that, young men, I understand that you may have a difficult time finding a wife that wants to be like this. Well, just keep looking. God's got somebody. God's got somebody. I believe for every godly man, God's got a godly wife. Just keep praying about it. You'd be surprised what God will do. Men need to be the person who will protect their wives and their families. Yes, the man is supposed to be the protector. I didn't marry a bodyguard. If anybody's going to do that, it's supposed to be the man for the wife and the kids. If somebody's going to take a bullet, it better be the man. They're supposed to be the protectors. They're supposed to be the person that defends their wife and their kids. They need to learn that early. They need to learn that early. They need to take responsibility for them. Men need to be the ones who fight for them. Now, I have all kinds of respect I have all kinds of respect for all the women in our country today that are taking a stand, that are fighting school boards. I might do things differently and just take my kids out and I wouldn't might, I would. But I still have tremendous respect for those that have the backbone to stand up and say what needs to be said. But I always wonder, and the same thing's true in our government. I respect the women that actually stand for what's right and have the backbone to say so and stand up and say so. But I always wonder, where are the men? Where are the men? And there's a reason it's not that way. This problem's been around for a long time. I think I've mentioned before, but when my wife was in school, junior high and high school, there were several kids in that school that went to the same church, said they believed the same thing. But anytime a subject came up that was controversial, like abortion, and it was just starting to be a hot issue at that time, and every time it came up, guess who opened their mouth? The boys all ducked their heads and put their hands under their desks and a little old girl about 102 pounds stood up and took a stand. Now that's some real men for you right there. Now that's some young men. I'm being extremely facetious, I think you know that. It's time that men stood up and were counted. And it's time for young men to realize there's no better time to start than right now. Right now. You say there'll be repercussions. Of course there's going to be repercussions. That's why it takes a man. The early Jews wanted men who were actually expected to set an example. I believe this is important in education. They wanted men teaching their young men who were actually expected to set an example in their life and their work. In other words, if they were married, Well, if they had a woman, they better be married and not just shacking up with her. Or they'd lose their job. They wouldn't get a job in the first place. It also meant that they actually expected him to have another job. They wanted him to be set in an example of his work ethic as well as his teaching ability. You say, well, you can't get that. I'll tell you what you'd end up with. They did not have the philosophy that we have in America. We're so foolish, we think if we want a better teacher, we need to pay them more. The best teachers are the ones that want to teach if they don't get paid anything. Same thing's true with preachers. It's the ones that preach before they ever get paid anything, because they want to preach. and they'll preach down the road if they have to, without pay, if there aren't enough people there to support them. And that's true when I look back over the men that have impacted my life the most. Every one of them was willing to do whatever they had to do in order to preach the Word of God and try to teach and other young men what it means to be a preacher and to be a pastor. And I find this. Those men were men that actually were the strongest doctrinally also. They didn't suffer in their studies. It just took more time out of their day. They expected in the past, they expected them to at least, like I said, partially support themselves. They wanted their young men could look at an example. An example. You see, educating is not just book learning. It's life. It's life. Paul told Timothy in 2 Timothy chapter 3 and verse 10, "'But thou hast fully known my doctrine," now listen to all of this, "'my doctrine, my manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience, which came unto me at Antioch, and I call him in Lystra. What persecutions I endured, but out of them all the Lord delivered me." Timothy knew more about Paul than his doctrine. He knew everything about him. He fully knew his life. And I find with the apostle Paul that he set an example in his work, the Lord's work. of which nobody could find fault with the Apostle Paul's work ethic when it came to his preaching and his teaching and his study. But he also saw from Paul a man who was willing to undergo difficulties. And he told Timothy, you're going to have to do the same thing. You're going to have to suffer trouble and you're going to keep going through the grace of God. They preached, they taught, They worked with their hands, physical, mental, and spiritual hardship. In Acts chapter 20 and verse 34, the apostle Paul said, "'Yea, ye yourselves know that these hands have ministered unto my necessities and to them that were with me.'" Not just his own, he helped support those that were with him. I don't think that meant they sat around and did nothing while he was working, but they I have shown you in all things how that soul laboring in the Word of God, in doctrine, and with his hands, you ought to support the weak, to remember the words of the Lord Jesus Christ, how he said, it is more blessed to give than to receive. You see, training young men and young ladies Educating them is about life. It isn't just book learning. It takes a lot of book learning. It takes a lot of reading, writing, and arithmetic, and history, biblical history, national history. It takes all of that. It takes something that is I'll say almost, because I don't know every example. But it is almost completely missing in our education system today. And that's teaching critical thinking. It means take, you know this about this, and you know this about this. And when you put those two things together, what do you come up with? It means when this happens and this happens at the same time and it keeps happening like that, there's a connection between those two things. What's the connection? Cause and effect. And being able to analyze that, look down the road a little bit, and have some discernment. But that's something that is not wanted today. There's every effort being made to completely eliminate that. You just think what we want you to think. Listen to these verses in the Word of God, and I'll close with this. 1 Corinthians 16 and verse 13. Wash ye, stand fast in the faith, quit ye like men. Men. That's biblically masculine men. First Timothy 2.8, I will therefore that men pray everywhere. It's talking about what happens in the Lord's church. Of course, women are supposed to pray too. The Bible says much about that. But in the Lord's house that men ought to pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands without wrath and doubting. And then in verse 12 of the same chapter, but I suffer not a woman to teach nor to usurp authority over the man. Young men, when they become adolescents, need to start learning what this means. So that they learn to be the ones that have the answers, and are expected to have the answers, and expected to do the study. And so they do have the answers at a young age. And then they'll have them later. And they'll expect themselves. They'll expect it of themselves. Thou, therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus and the things that thou hast heard of me among many witnesses. The same commit thou to faithful men who shall be able to teach others also. Thou, therefore," this is a big therefore. Thou, therefore, endure hardness as a good soldier of Jesus Christ. Who's he talking to? Timothy, a much younger preacher. Paul set the example. He told him, I've set the example. This is what you've seen in me. Now you do it. That's what it means to be a father, too. This is what you've seen in me. It's what I've tried to make sure you learn, even if I had to have somebody else actually do the teaching, but I tried to make sure you get it. Now you do it. He set the example by the word of God. And that example ultimately comes down to the Lord Jesus Christ. What did he do before his ministry started? He learned to be a carpenter. Until he was 30 years old, he worked with his hands. And a carpenter didn't just build houses. They didn't build stick houses back then. A carpenter back then built anything You know, he was the town handyman. He was the builder, in other words. So he was a builder. And then, when he started his ministry, he said, upon this rock I will build my church. Boy, he knew what that illustration meant, didn't he? He knew exactly what it meant. Let's stand and have a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, we thank you tonight for the great privilege that we have to know the Lord Jesus Christ and the free pardon of sin that comes through him. And we thank you, Father, for the privilege that is ours to know you and to serve you. And we trust you to help us in our lives and in our families to honor you and to exalt the Lord Jesus Christ in our lives and in our speech. In Jesus' name we