Amen. If you have your Bibles, would you turn to Titus chapter 2? Titus chapter 2. We've been spending the last three weeks looking at the topic of marriage. We spent two weeks looking at what God says the role of a husband is. Last week we started the first try at what the role of a wife is. Hadn't finished that up. We'd like to finish that up today. As I look forward, and I've been doing my studies, I think this series on marriage might have one more Sunday to it. Next Sunday, Lord willing, I'd like to talk about the art of fighting. Get a couple of giggles. You know, in 1 Corinthians 7, I think it's verse 28, it said marriage is hard. There'll be troubles. And whenever you put two sinners together, and I don't care if it's husband and wife, it could be a father and a son, it could be two coworkers, you're gonna have disagreements. And the Bible tells you how to go about profitably interacting. So it'll be on the rules of engagement, I guess would be a good title for that sermon. But that's next week. If you have your Bibles and you turn to Titus 2, there's about three lists of, I hate to sound like a, I don't know, like a doctor and have a prescription. These aren't prescriptions, this is remedy medicine, religion, that's not what I'm advocating. What I'd like to do today is look at three descriptions of very godly women. One is in Titus 2, the other one's in 1 Peter 3, and the other one is in Proverbs 31. I like to look at those lists. I'm not gonna spend a lot of time on those lists because I would rather go to the Bible and look at real life people that were recorded in scripture, both good, virtuous women and women that are not so virtuous. When the boys were, I don't know, eight or 10 years old, we were walking through a department store one day, And a song came over the PA system. It said, if you want to be happy for the rest of your life, pick an ugly woman to be your wife. And the boys, I told them, I said, listen to the lyrics. And they giggled, hee, hee, hee. And I said, boys, that's a lie. I met a lot of ornery, ugly women. I said, if you want to be happy for the rest of your life, pick a virtuous woman to be your wife. They say, okay, dad, we've been doing that ever since. I've been reading them Proverbs 31 as long as they've been little, when they still thought girls were yucky, okay? But here's one of the scriptures. We just got into it a little bit last week. Titus 2, verse three, that the aged women likewise that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things. And these older women are supposed to turn around and teach younger women. I've gone over this before. As a pastor, I'm supposed to teach older men, younger men, and older women, but there's one group that's off limits for me, and that's younger women. I don't do that. And I guess as I get older, that group gets bigger and bigger. But there's a group I'm supposed to stay away from and the older women in this church are supposed to step up and teach these things and there's eight things listed here in verses four and five. Four of them are what I call qualities, four of them are what I call responsibilities. That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Last week we looked at sober, discreet, chaste, and good. Today, just real briefly, I want to talk about loving husbands. And even when we're talking about the husband's role, love is not feelings, it's not the Hollywood thing that's portrayed in our culture. Love is doing, godly love. Love your children. Now usually when you think about loving children, you think of someone that's nursing, or unholding and cuddling a little baby, or maybe in bed telling them a nighttime story. But loving also talks about correcting too. Matter of fact, Proverbs says, if you don't correct your children, you really hate them. That's part of loving too. Keepers at home. I don't tell you, you listen to most radio stations, and it'll be quoted keepers of the home, and that's not what it says. I even looked it up in the Greek. You know what the word at means in the Greek? It means at. Keepers at home. And finally, obedient to their husbands. There's that S word that shows up throughout scripture. Ephesians 5 and 22. Wives, submit unto your husbands, as unto the Lord. Colossians 3, 18. Wives, submit as to your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. And then we'll read it again in 1 Peter chapter one. And then finally, we look at this particular, and why do we do this? For two reasons. One, it glorifies God, that the word of God be not blaspheming. Do you realize when you're acting as a ungodly wife, you're blaspheming the Lord. And then ultimately, marriage is nothing more than a picture of the church and Jesus Christ. And everything we can put on the church, we can put, I'm sorry, everything we can put on a wife, we can put on New Testament church, okay? So the first passage, if you're really wondering what a good wife does, you go to Titus chapter two. While we're here at the end of the New Testament, let's go to 1 Peter chapter three, and here's another description of a virtuous woman. 1 Peter three, allow me to read one through six. You're going, as we read this passage, you'll read and you'll see a lot of the same words we just read in Titus 2. See if you can pick them up. Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of wives. while they behold your chaste, recognize that word, conversation coupled with fear, whose adorning, let it not be that outward adorning of plating of the hair and the wearing of gold or the putting on of apparel, but let it be the hidden man of the heart in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. Now, just don't get me wrong. I've got nothing against, or I don't think God has anything against doing your hair, wearing a bracelet, doing a little makeup, dressing nice. I do not look frumpy. God does not. When we get to Proverbs 31, we'll see that God does not want you women to look frumpy. But there's a balance here. What the balance is, is think about it. How much time did I spend laying out my clothes? How much did I spend doing my hair? How much time did I spend doing my makeup? And then compare that to how much time did I spend praying and how much did I spend in the word of God and trying to commune with the Lord? If the weighting is 10 to one, I think that's what the Lord's talking about, okay? What should your priority be? Your looks, your attire, your face, your shoes? That's one thing, that's one of my pet feeves. Ladies will always go to the other ladies. Oh, I love your shoes. You ask a guy, do they ever notice shoes? Never. Never. Okay? I want my wife to look good. I want her to be pleasing. I want her to be confident about herself. But at the same time, that better not be her first priority. And that shows up in the waiting. Okay? Verse six. even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement. Okay, so we looked at two phrases of what godly women are. One of them is found in Titus 2. Another one is in 1 Peter 3. I've got one third list, and I'm gonna go through this really quick. I've got plenty of sermons I've done in years past. and we can go through those if you want those notes and you wanna do that. I wanna look at real life examples in the Bible of these things being displayed. I think that's where people mostly get their instructions through the illustrations. The last one is in Proverbs 31. Proverbs 31. And I think this is really critical to when you look at Proverbs 31, The fence barriers usually go up. There's Proverbs 31, the virtuous woman. And it's real interesting, it starts at verse 10 and it goes all the way to verse 31. And it turns out that's 22 verses, okay? In the Hebrew alphabet, there were 22 letters. And I'm not a Hebrew scholar, this is what I've read other Hebrew scholars say. But did you know when you start at verse 10 and you go all the way to verse 31, that's 22 verses? that the Hebrew alphabet is A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Each one of these verses start with a next letter of the Hebrew alphabet. So literally, this is the A to Z of a virtuous woman. But when you go through this list, I always like to start way up at verse one. And these are a mother's instructions to her son. A man didn't come up with this list, a woman came up with this list. Verse one, the words of King Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him. So when we go to Proverbs 31 and we look at this 22 passage verse of what a virtuous woman is, mom told her son, look for this boy, There's no greater love than a mother has. There's no greater happiness than a boy will have than to pick a good wife. So this is a woman's instruction to her son, okay? I'm gonna go through very quickly. We could spend, oh, probably a Sunday on each one of these qualities. But as we read these qualities, kind of put them on our memory bank, and we're gonna look at some of the women of the Bible, and we'll see how some of the women display these qualities, okay? Verse 10. Who can find a virtuous woman for her price is far above rubies? Okay, now we're gonna go start, she's precious. We're gonna go through some of the qualities. Verse 11 basically says she's trustworthy. You want a wife that's trustworthy. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her so that he shall have no need of spoil. If I had to go overseas for a month or two months, my oldest son's gonna be commissioned if he got married and had to go overseas for eight or nine months. Could he turn the checkbook over to her and everything would be fine when he got back. This is what the verse says. The heart of her husband does safely trust in her so that he shall have no need of spoil. Verse two, she will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. She's responsible. She's responsible. Verse 13. She's a willing worker. She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands. Verse 14, she's resourceful. She is like the merchant's ships. She bringeth her food from afar. Verse 15, she's prepared. She rises all so wide as yet night, that means really early in the morning, and giveth meat to her household and a portion to her maidens. She's not late to church because she got up early and got it done beforehand. Verse 16, she's ambitious. She considereth a field and buyeth it. With the fruit of her hands, she planteth a vineyard. Verse 17, she's energetic. She girdeth her loins with strength and strengtheneth the arms. She's strong. Verse 18, she's confident. She perceiveth that her merchandise is good, her candleth goeth not out by night. I gotta tell you a little story about verse 18. I'm gonna embarrass Emma, okay? Now this is when she was five, so she's 12 now, so I figure seven years ago is fair game. Ever since my boys have been little, I've been reading them Proverbs 31. I want them to have brainwashed in their head what a Proverbs 31 woman is, and to look for one, even at a young age. And I used to do this, and at family devotions, and I don't know if it was about once a month, or once every other month, but on a very regular basis, they learned about Proverbs 31, and when I do that, the old boys are older, and way down the line are my girls. There's a seven year gap between the boys and the girls. So Emma's maybe four or five years old, and she's hearing these daily devotionals, And the stuff's going in her ears. And then one night, it's in Georgia, and it's May, and I say, eight o'clock, Emma, it's time for bed. She quoted this verse. She said, Daddy, a virtuous woman doesn't go to bed when there's still light outside. Now, I didn't trust her motives one single bit. But I did know scripture was taken root in a little baby. So it's never too young. Okay? Verse 19. She layeth her hands to the spindle and her hands hold the distaff. She's a hands-on worker. Verse 20. She's charitable. She stretcheth out her hand to the poor, yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. Verse 21, she's diligent. She is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all her household are clothed with scarlet. Verse 22, this is where she dresses herself nice for her husband. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry, her clothing is silk and purple. See, it's not wrong for a woman to look nice. So maybe I ought to take a little time and do a little side trip where it's wrong to spend too much time getting ready as opposed to preparing your heart for maybe a service. Gentlemen, you're right the opposite. Maybe you don't spend enough time getting ready. for your wives. You look good for one person, you look good for her. So maybe their extreme is one way, our extreme might be the other, and they're both wrong. We're here to please our spouses. 23, she's supportive. Her husband is known in the gates when he sitteth among the elders of the land. Verse 24, she's industrious. She maketh fine linen and selleth it and delivereth girdles unto the merchants. Verse 25, she's dignified. Strength and honor are her clothing and she shall rejoice in the time to come. Verse 26, she's noble. She openeth her mouth with wisdom and her tongue is the law of kindness. Verse 37, she's effective. She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness. Verse 28, she's honored. Her children arise up and call her blessed. Her husband also, he praiseth her. Verse 29, she's successful. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excelest them all. Verse 30, she's reverent. She fears the Lord. Favor is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. And finally, verse 31, she's deserving. Give her the fruit of her hands and let her own works praise her in the gates. Okay, so real quick. She's trustworthy, she's responsible, she's spirited, a willing worker. She's resourceful, she's prepared, she's ambitious, she's energetic, she's confident, hands on, charitable, diligent, appealing, supportive, industrious, dignified, noble, effective, honored, successful, reverent, and deserving. Okay? That's a big list. That's a mouthful. What I'd like to do is go read some very godly women in the Bible and let's see what stuff comes out. First woman I'd like to read about is a woman named Rebecca. Turn with me to Genesis 24. I've just given you the three, I want to call this theory. It's not theory because it's the word of God, but it's kind of like this is what we should be striving to. Titus 2, 1 Peter 3, and Proverbs 31. Now I want to try to give you the case studies to show this stuff being illustrated. So let's go to Genesis 24 and let's see it. Now I'm going to start reading here in verse 10, but I'm going to spend just a little bit of time giving you the background and to set up the stage. Abraham is an older man and he had a son named Isaac. He had a son in very old age. And it come time for Isaac to get married. So what Abraham does is he looks and he gets his most trusted employee, the one he's allocated all his assets to. The man has discretion over all of his funds and his assets, a real trustworthy servant. I kind of picture, this is my imagination, I'm guessing the guy has three or four boys, and all the boys married really fine women, and they're happy. So Abraham goes to this son, or this employee, and says, I want you to find my son a wife. Now, that sounds crazy in this day and age. We just don't think like that. Let's pretend I was going on a preaching meeting, and Brother Danny said, it's time for Josiah. to get a wife. Brother Dolph, I want to keep your eye out for a wife for my son, okay? Brother Richard, let's suppose you did that for one of your two sons, okay? Guys, would you trust me? Okay. All right, let's read the story, okay? Genesis 24 and verse 10. And the servant took 10 camels of the camels of his master and departed. So Brother Richard gave me, I got my 15 passenger van out there, and let's pretend I got a caravan of 10 of them. And they're all filled up with dowry, or not dowry, just gifts. 10 vans all loaded up with gifts. And I'm going to a preaching meeting in Alabama or Georgia, looking for some wives for our young men. For all the goods of his master were in his hand. And he rose and went to Mesopotamia, unto the city of Nahor. And he made his camels to kneel down without the city by a well of water at the time of the evening, even the time that women go out to draw water. And he said, O Lord God of my master Abraham, I pray thee, send me good speed this day and show kindness unto my master Abraham. Behold, I stand here by the well of waters as the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water. and let it come to pass that the damsel to whom I shall say, let down my pitcher, I pray thee, that I may drink, and she shall say, drink, and I will give thy camel's drink also. Let the same be she that has appointed for thy servant Isaac, and thereby shall I know thou hast showed kindness unto my master." It's kind of a very interesting prayer. Here's the servant, here's the trusted servant that's got all the allocation. He's got a great big caravan of just riches and gifts. And he says, Lord, I want to do a good job. I just made a promise to my master to go out and get my master's son a good wife. And Lord, this is a hard thing. Lord, make it plain. I tell you what, Lord, give me a sign. When I show up, this is what I want you to happen. I want a woman to come up and give me a drink of water, and not only that, I want her to give all my camels a drink of water, too. Now, I don't know much about camels, but I'm guessing one camel will take a lot of water. Kind of like picking up about 15, 15 passengers' vans with gasoline, okay? I love this verse 15. It sounds like insignificant words. And it came to pass before he had done speaking. Boy, that's a great God. Before he finishes the prayer, here comes a looker. Now that's not King James English, but that's what it says. She's a looker. Oh, Brother Evan, you smiled. Can you trust in me now? Okay. And it came to pass, before he had done speaking, that behold, Rebecca came out, who was born of Bethuel, son of Milcah, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, with her pitcher on her shoulder. And the damsel was very fair to look upon. See, she's a looker. a virgin, neither had any man known her. And she went down to the well and filled up her pitcher and came up. So can you imagine the servant, he just made this prayer, he's looking down, he says, Lord, just make it plain. And he sees this pretty girl go by. Before he's done uttering the prayer, this pretty girl goes by. So the servant runs and says, can I have a drink of water? Let's see what happens. Verse 17, and the servant ran to meet her and said, let me, I pray thee, drink a little water of thy pitcher. And she said, drink, my lord. And she hasted and let down her pitcher upon her hand and gave him drink. And when she had done giving him drink, she said, I will draw water for thy camels also until they have done drinking. She filled up 10 camels. And she hasted and emptied her pitcher into the trough, and ran again unto the well to draw water, and drew for all his camels." So can you see Rebekah going back and forth to the well, to the trough? And here's the servant just sitting there in amazement. Watch her go back. He's shocked. He's amazed. And the man wondering at her held his peace to wit, whether the Lord had made his journey prosperous or not. What an understatement. Now, Brother Evan, your dad may have sent me to look for this woman, but I'll tell you what, if I found one like that, I might say, forget that, I'm gonna remember one of my boys, okay? But I wouldn't do that because I made an oath. And I said, I'm gonna find this one, so I guess you got first dibs on the next one. Do you got a sister? Maybe I can give her, okay? All right, what does this woman have? We just read the list in Titus 2, we just read the description over there in 1 Peter 3, and we just read all that stuff in Proverbs 31. Let me go through that list again, thinking of Rebecca and everything you just saw in this little action. Trustworthy, responsible, willing worker, big check, right? Resourceful, prepared, ambitious, energetic, big check. Confident, hands on, big check. Charitable, big check. Diligent, big check. Appealing, got that. Supportive, industrious, dignified, noble, effective, honored, successful, reverent, and deserving. You know what? That's a virtuous woman. If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, get a virtuous woman to be your wife, and this servant found one. And this one worked out pretty well. Okay, let's go look at another woman in scripture. Let's go to Ruth chapter two. Let's see if we can see some of these things in our three descriptions in Ruth two. Now Ruth is right after Judges and before 1 Samuel. I say that to buy time as I'm turning there too. Let's read of a second woman, Ruth. I'd like to start reading here at verse two. I'll give you just a little bit of background of chapter one. There was a husband and wife, two boys that left Jerusalem and took off to a far nation because of a drought. When the drought happened, they felt economic hard times and they looked for greener pastures. When they were out, Bad things happen. The husband died. The two boys died. And here's just Naomi left with two daughter-in-laws. She says, I am poor. I don't have anything. I'm going back home and be a pauper. You go back to your parents. One of these women, Ruth, said, uh-uh, I'm not doing it. I'm sticking by you. You don't have anything. I'm going to support you. So they show back home. And you know what she's doing? Back in the Old Testament, they didn't have welfare, they had workfare. So if I was a farmer and I was plowing a field, there were some certain rules that were for me for when I plowed a field. One of the things is when I plowed a field, I couldn't hit the corners of my yard. I wasn't supposed to do that. And then once I harvested a field, I couldn't wait six days and go back and hit it again for the stuff that kind of ripened just a couple days later or late. All that stuff was for the poor people. The Bible had a system of welfare, but it wasn't welfare, it was workfare, and the poor people could go into that man's fields and harvest the corners and go through the second gleaning, there was no second gleaning. That's all in the book of Moses and all that stuff is all recorded. So she goes back, she knows the Jewish law, and she says, Naomi, mom, mother-in-law, we need some food. I'm gonna go pick, I'm gonna pick. The stuff that God set up for poor people, the people that were economically depressed. So this is where we find her. So here we are in Ruth chapter 2, starting at verse 2. the Moabitess said unto Naomi, let me now go to the field and glean ears of corn after him whose sight I shall find grace. And she said unto her, go. Went and came and gleaned in the field after the reapers. Do you see that? After the reapers. The reapers would go through because they own the land and here's his hired workers and he would harvest the land and anything that was left over they could go through after them and the people that own the land couldn't say, get off my land. That was for the poor people, that was God's system. And her hap was to light on a part of the field belonging unto Boaz, who was of the kindred of Elimelech. And behold, Boaz came from Bethlehem and said unto the reapers, the Lord be with you. And they answered him, the Lord bless thee. Then said Boaz unto his servant that was said over the reapers, whose damsel is this? So Boaz is coming through and he's looking at his field and see how this worker's going through. And he looks and behind the reapers is this girl. And evidently he's observant enough to say, hey, there's a stranger in my field. Who's that behind there? And the servant, he's kind of like the foreman. And the servant that was set over the reapers answered and said, it is the Moabitish damsel that came back with Naomi out of the country of Moab. And she said, I pray you, let me glean after and gather after the reapers among the sheaves. So she came and hath continued even from morning until now. that she tarried a little in the house. In other words, she got up early in the morning, she's worked the entire day, she just took one short small break. Verse eight, then said Boaz unto Ruth, Hearest thou not my daughter? Go not to glean in another field, neither go from hence, but abide here fast by my maidens. Let thine eyes be on the field that they do reap, and go thou after them. Have I not charged the young men that they shall not touch thee? And when thou get our thirst, go into the vessels and drink of that which the young men have drawn. In other words, he is so touched by the charity, Ruth shows her mother-in-law, a foreigner in a foreign land, he says, don't you dare, when it comes time to harvesting other fields, don't you go anywhere else. You just pick the corners and you pick after my reapers. Matter of fact, when they draw water for themselves, you drink of that stuff. And I love it later on, he tells the workers, he says, I want you to drop some handfuls of purpose. I love that phrase. In other words, when you're reaping, Ruth's behind you. Just take a handful, instead of throwing it in your sack, just kind of drop it on the ground. Here comes Ruth, and she picks it up. But that's a whole different story. And she says, you follow me. Don't you go on another field. Don't you glean anywhere else. You just stay right here. My guys have given orders to protect you, and they're not to touch you. Then she fell on her face and bowed herself to the ground and said unto him, Why have I found grace in thine eyes, that thou shouldest take knowledge of me, seeing I am a stranger? See the humbleness in Ruth? And Boaz answered and said unto her, I hath fully been showed me, it had fully been showed me, that all that thou hast done unto my mother-in-law, I'm sorry, I'm getting too excited and my mouth is going faster than my head, okay? Done unto thy mother-in-law since the death of thine husband, and how thou hast left thy father and thy mother and the land of thy nativity, and are come unto a people which thou knewest not. The Lord recompense thee. Okay. My friends, she's a virtuous woman. Let's go through the list. Trustworthy, responsible, spirited, willing worker, resourceful, prepared, ambitious, energetic, confident, hands-on, charitable. She was certainly showing charity to her mother-in-law, wasn't she? Hands-on, charitable, diligent, appealing, supportive, industrious, dignified, noble, effective, honored, successful, reverent, and deserving. My friends, she was all those things. Ruth would be a good catch, young man. Ruth would be a good pattern. Now, I'm just talking to young men like they're doing it. I've got two little girls, and I'm gonna try to prepare the best I can to develop these virtues in them and get them to be this woman of Proverbs 31, of 1 Peter 3, in Titus chapter 2. Gotta develop them so they can be godly people. Let's look at a, Let's look at one more virtuous woman. And then I wanna do it in the ditch and go the other round and look at some ones that are the other extreme. Sometimes you can learn from the ones that are, but you can also learn from the ones that are not. Let's go to the New Testament. Let's look at a woman named Tabitha. Let's go to Acts chapter nine, Acts chapter nine. And let's read a short little description of a woman named Tabitha. 36 through 39, Acts 9, 36. Now, there was at Joppa a certain disciple named Tabitha, which by interpretation is called Dorcas. So Reed, if I brought her home, I think the wedding invitation would say Reed and Tabitha, not Reed and Dorcas, okay? Come on, Reed, you can smile a little bit, okay? This woman was full of good works and alms, deeds, which she did. There's already two things right there, right? And it came to pass in those days that she was sick and died, whom, when they had washed, they laid her in an upper chamber. And for as much as Lydda was nigh to Joppa, and the disciples had heard that Peter was there, they sent unto him two men, desiring him that he would not delay to come to them. Then Peter rose and went with them when he was come and they brought him into the upper chamber and all the widows stood by him weeping and showing the coats and garments which Dorcas made while she was with them." My friends, that's a virtuous woman too. I'm going to share a story. When I first met Deborah, and I'll probably embarrass her and put her under the pew, but I've shared with you before, At the time I met her, I was a widower with three small boys. They were five, six, and eight years old maybe. It was a scary thing. It's one thing for me to go out and find someone to marry, but when you have children involved, you're a package deal. Whatever happens will happen to them, too. So, there's nervousness, extra nervousness, I think, when you're talking about, you know, getting a package deal of a man with three sons. So, I went down, and she was living in West Malpeach at the time, and she was living with a sister of hers that had some children, and she was in between jobs and trying to get an apartment, but anyway, when I went down there, The first time we had to go down there was actually for a church meeting. Her brother-in-law was getting ordained as a deacon. So the first date, the first time we ever spent together, she picked me up at my hotel, and then we went over and we picked up Sister August Baker, who was 94, 96? 94, 96-year-old woman, a member of the church. She was our chaperone. I was 40, and Deborah was early 30s, and she was our chaperone. And we went over there, and she picked me up at the hotel, and then I went, and we met Mrs. Baker, and then we went to church. But when I picked up Sister Baker, you know what convinced me that she was the right one? I read the letters, we talked on the phone, all that stuff went on, but it was this much slip. A slip. Sister Baker came out, and she was all embarrassed, because this much slip was showing underneath her dress. And she said, Dolph, turn around. So I did. And Deborah dropped to her knees and went under that older woman's skirt and hiked it up and put it down. And she says, OK, you can turn around again. I said, that sealed the deal for me. My friends, that's what Dorcas or Tabitha did. She had the widow's gave the time. And then the whole time I was visiting, Sister Baker was bragging on Deborah and how she took care of her and would come over in regular places and clean her house and pick her up for church And they were buddies. And I thought that's it. If she could serve then, she could serve me and my sons. And that was the deal-clencher. Young men, there's nothing that's more important to you in every aspect of health, mental health, spiritual health, financial health, every way, than to find yourself a virtuous woman. And I pray all of you do. And I pray we can raise up our little girls, become virtuous women. All right. So we've looked at a couple examples of what virtuous women are. We've looked at the passages. Now I want to go to the other extreme. Let's go to Proverbs. Let's go to Proverbs 7. And let's look at the opposite ends of the screen. Now, as I put this forward, if you're a woman right now and you're thinking, oh my, Proverbs 31, I'll never attain to that. Well, that's the target. You know what our target's his husband is? Jesus Christ. Do you think any of us will ever attain to that? No way, Jose. But it doesn't mean we don't stop trying. Jesus Christ is the best husband and I need to strive for him. Let's go to Proverbs 7. And let's look at a couple passages here, the other extremes. Proverbs 7, I'm gonna start reading here verse 10. Okay, this is a married woman. It says, and behold, there met him, this is a young man, a woman with the attire of a harlot and a subtle heart. She is loud and stubborn, just the opposite of what we read in 1 Peter 3. Remember the meek and quiet spirit? Her feet abideth not in her house, keepers at home, just the opposite, right? Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner. So she caught him, kissed him with an impudent face, said unto him, I have peace offerings. And then you can read about the seduction that happens after that. Got a couple more Proverbs I'd like to go to. Let's go to Proverbs 21 and verse nine. Proverbs 21 and verse nine. Now I got to admit the book of Proverbs is a little bit biased. The reason why it's biased, it's written to a father to a son. So it's written about a lot of harlot, wanting type women. And it's just simply because of the subject matter and who the book was written to. But a lot of this stuff could be flip-flopped. So it looks like God's tough on women, and you can take these same principles and apply them to men. Let's go to Proverbs 21, verse nine. It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop than with a brawling woman in a wide house. God's got a sense of humor. He says, you would be better in a little four by four foot foot square in an upper attic than being into a great big wide mansion with a brawling woman. I think God's got a sense of humor. Verse 19. It is better to dwell in the wilderness than with a contentious and an angry woman. Guys, you'd be better off in a tent out in the woods than in a really nice house with an angry woman. Chapter 27 in verse 5. 27 in verse 5. That's not the one I want. I must, is it 15? It's 15, I'm sorry, I wrote it down wrong. Proverbs 27 verse 15. A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. I gotta tell you a story about this one, okay? You know what God's saying here? This is his sense of humor. He says, you know, marry a contentious woman, it's like Chinese water torture. That's what he's saying, that's what it says. And one day I was preaching on this. Thank you, Brother Doug, I thought that was pretty funny too. Let me tell you a story, you'll even think it's funnier. I was preaching on this back in Moriah. We had a lot of young people, and there's this one guy there, a young man, that was dating a girl, a high school sweetheart, and they were dating for about three years. And Dad didn't like her, and Mom didn't like her, and this particular young man had an older brother, and the older brother didn't like her. brought her to church, and you'd look in the back row, and that was the last place she wanted to be. I could look at her and I could say, brother, you're in trouble with this one. But he wouldn't hear it. And one day I preached on this verse. And this particular brother was on my mind. And in the pulpit, I did this. I said, you know what God's saying? For the rest of your life, You know what that brother told me? He didn't admit it until about three weeks later in a parking lot. He said, Brother Dahl, the next day my girlfriend called me up and was yip-yapping at me. And he says, all I could hear was... And he said, if we're doing this, we're dating, what's going to happen when five years married? He said, that's it, we're done, we're done. And I said, praise God! Saved him from a terrible death. But that's the word of God. I know you're laughing and you're giggling, but that's the word of God. Let's read the verse again, verse 15. A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. There's no relief. And I could flip it around. An immature guy in a marriage to a woman, there's no relief for that either. You think I'm... If it's to save a young man from that kind of thing, I'll stand to my head, but I'll do this too, okay? All right. One more in Proverbs, let's go to 30 and 17. Proverbs 30 and verse 17. This is really important, young men. The eye that mocketh at his father and despises to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out and the young eagles shall eat it. You're thinking, what's that got to do? This is a tip. When you are thinking about courting a young lady, watch the way she interacts with her mom and dad. If she shows them disrespect, Do you really think she's going to show you respect in marriage? Watch that really, really close. Now, I've already given the tips for the young woman to what? To look for in a man. So don't think I'm just railing on the women today. I already did that the previous two weeks. But you've got to watch that. If she's fighting her father, she's rolling the eyes at mom, back talking, snapping. Couple years of marriage, you're gonna get that, buddy. You can expect it, okay? Unless the God intervenes. That's the word of God, okay? All right, let's look at a couple examples, and probably Samson was the worst woman picker-outer there was in the Bible, okay? If there's such a thing as a woman picker-outer, okay? Let's go to Judges chapter 14, and let's look at a couple of the women he picks out. Judges 14. And let me start reading at verse 10. See Joshua, then Judges 14. Let me start reading here at verse 10. There was a discussion in the first nine verses. Samson said, there's a pretty girl. And mom and dad go to Samson and said, but she's a stranger. She's got a different faith. Samson said, I'll honor her anyway. Okay? Let's start here with verse 10. Judges 14 and verse 10. The one thing that I want you to listen to, in all the submit passages that we talked about in the New Testament, Ephesians 5 and 22, Wives, submit unto your own husbands as unto the Lord. Colossians 3.18, Wives, submit unto your own husbands as it is fit unto the Lord. 1 Peter 3.1, Wives, be in subjection to your own husbands. You're not supposed to be in subjection anymore to your parents or to other men. two become one, there's only one you're subject to, okay? Look who's this woman's subject to. Judges 14 in verse 10. So his father went down unto the woman, and Samson made there a feast, for so used the young men to do. Dad says, I don't like her, I want her anyway. Dad says, okay, I'll get her for you. And it came to pass when they saw him that they brought 30 companions to be with him. And Samson said unto them, I will now put forth a riddle unto you. If he can certainly declare it with me within seven days of the feast and find it out, then I will give you 30 sheets and 30 changes of garments. But if you cannot declare it, me, then shall ye give me 30 sheets and 30 change of garments. And they said unto him, put forth thy riddle, that we may hear it. And he said unto them, out of the eater came forth meat, and out of the strong came forth sweetness. And they could not in three days expound the riddle. And it came to pass on the seventh day, that they said unto Samson's wife, entice thy husband, that he may declare unto us the riddle. Lest we burn thee in thy father's house with fire, have ye called us to take that we have. Is it not so? Now, I gotta admit, this is pretty extreme circumstances. But we're gonna burn you and your dad if you don't entice your husband. And she did it. And I love the rest of this. I got it way down at the bottom. Let's go down here. Let's read the rest of this, verse 16. And Samson's wife wept before him and said, thou dost but hate me, and lovest me not. She's lying through her teeth. Thou hast put forth a riddle upon the children of my people, and hast not told it to me. And he said unto her, Behold, I have not told it to my father nor my mother. And shall I tell it to thee? And she went before him. She just poured on the tears. I can see the little lip coming out right now, right? Well, their feast lasted, and it came to pass in the seventh day that he told her, because she lay sore upon him. And she told the riddle to the children of her people. And the men of the city said unto him on the seventh day before the sun set down, what is sweeter than honey and what is stronger than a lion? And he said unto them, if he had not plowed with my heifer, he had not found out my riddle." I've got to tell you this little story. Deborah and I lived for a time in North Carolina for about five years. And the closest relative she had was an aunt and uncle that lived in Cary, right outside of Raleigh, probably about 45 minutes away. And they were very nice people, very Christian people, and we used to visit with them a couple times a year. Very devout, church-going people. And sometimes I would go, and sometimes she would just go by herself. And I noticed the pattern. Every time that she went by herself, she'd say, well, he asked me about election, and he asked me about effectual call, and all this kind of stuff. And I said, why is it that every time he asked doctrinal questions, it's, well, I'm not there? When is she always there? And I said, Debra, I said, you tell him the next time he asks you a doctrinal question when I'm not there, he said, you stop playing with my heifer. That was the only time I ever got away with a laugh of calling my wife a heifer. Because she knew exactly the verse I was quoting. But the thing is, is when two become one, you're not gonna be able to split and get in there for any reason whatsoever. So when we come and we think, what was this woman that Samson picked out? He went purely on looks. She didn't fear the Lord. She did not submit unto her own husband. She was submitting to the people of her people. Let's look at another example. Let's go to Judges 16. This will be my last illustration, Judges 16. We start at verse four. This is one of these deals. I won't read the whole passage, but this is one of these occasions where I go, Samson, what were you thinking? Verse four, and it came to pass afterward that he loved a woman in the valley of Sorek whose name was Delilah. I think everybody's heard the couple Samson and Delilah. Well, guys, stay 100 miles away from her or anyone like her. And the lords of the Philistine came upon her unto her, and said unto her, Entice him, and see wherein his great strength lieth. And by what means we may prevail against him, that we may bind him to afflict him. And we will give thee, every one of us, eleven hundred pieces of silver." This was a sheer bribery. Here's this guy that loves you, and I want you to find the strength so we can capture him. And it's amazing to me. So she turns on the tears, too. Oh, Samson, tell me where your strength's from. And he made a lie up. He told her a lie. The Philistines come in, and I think they break the bat dance. Oh, you lied to me. You didn't love me. I go, duh. Samson, what's wrong with you? She wanted the secret of your strength as soon as you told her the story. She went and told the Philistines, and they tried to kill you. Where's the love coming from? It happened three times! Not one time, not twice, but the third time. The third time, the tears are rolling. You don't love me, you're mocking me. Okay, it comes from my hair. You cut my hair, I don't have any strength. It's not getting in the middle. She puts his head on his lap and stroke on him, he falls asleep. Come on guys, come on fellow students. Cuts off his hair, he doesn't have a strength and he gets captured. What was the guy thinking? but I can't tell you how many times I've dealt with young people, male and female, that were so loved and awestruck that they couldn't see the simple truth, the treachery. Brother Evan, Brother Reed, Brother Josiah, maybe I can pick out a better one than you think I can, okay? All right, let's, Go back to our passage over here in Titus 2. Titus 2. Titus 2. I've got two more passages I'd like to go to and then we'll call it a day. Let's read this passage one more time. One will be to wrap this part of the message up and then give you a sneak preview to a future message. Let's read 4 and 5 one more time. And I want to encourage, when we're talking about this principle here in Titus 2, I'm looking here, and I'm seeing some very dear sisters. There's three right here. Sister Virginia, Sister Polita, and Sister Rhoda. And there's some over here, too. To my wife, when it says younger woman, to you, that she's a younger woman. She's not gone through the process of having children married yet. We've got her first one graduating from college just in a couple days. We haven't been through that yet either. There's a lot you can teach us. So when I do this, it's just not talking about my Emma and Hope, my 10 and my 12-year-old. It's talking about my 40-something-year-old wife. This is what we're supposed to be striving for. that they may teach the young woman to be sober. That's temperate, avoiding excess. To love their husbands. That's in every way. 1 Corinthians 7 and verse 10. Separation is not an option. It's not a tool to teach him a lesson. To love their children. That means being tender, but it also means being firm. To be discreet, judicious, circumspect, chaste, morally pure. That includes what you watch on television and what you read. I heard Ernie say this. He got after some folks at church. I don't know what was going on. I hadn't been there in a long time. But my sons came home and said, you couldn't believe what Brother Ernie said. He told every person in there that's married, you've got no business having an old boyfriend or a girlfriend on your Facebook. I don't have Facebook, so I don't know what they're talking about. But evidently, it meant something to a lot of people. That's part of being Chase, too. Keepers at home. That's the most important job in this country. Good, we found out good is the root word of God. Obedient to their own husbands. See, there's again their own husbands. Ladies, you don't need to obey me. You're not to be obedient to me. If I tell you the word of God, you should have a conscience in doing it, but it's not through me as an authority figure. It's through me because I'm presenting the word of God and you're really submitting to your heavenly father. obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. I pray that our marriages, that our children and our families are a beacon unto this community, in this dark world we live in, of who Jesus is, and the instruction and the happiness and the comfort that comes from this book that he wrote us. I pray to God that's the case. And I'll tell you what, if we can do that, this church will be bustin' to the seams. The goal is not to have a church bustin' to the seams. I don't mind it, and I like it, but that's not the goal. The goal is to glorify God. And I believe that God has promised we would prosper in that when we do that. I pray that we glorify God. That was my, the one last verse, I wanna go to 1 Corinthians, give you a sneak preview of next week. This will probably be the most important message of the whole deal. 1 Corinthians 7 and 28 is a sneak peek into next week. I've got three minutes and I'll take one minute of it. But, and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned. He's talking to some widowers. And if a virgin marries, she hath not sinned. Here's the sentence I want, nevertheless, Such shall have trouble in the flesh, but I spare you. What he's saying is marriage is work. When two sinners come together, you'll have disagreements. You'll have faults. And there is a way to point out a fault to a spouse, and there's a way not to do it. There's a way to work out a disagreement and there's a way that it will not be profitable and it'll just make wounds and open it up further than not. So if you are married, I just heard a man preach once. He says there's three phases of marriage. The first is the honeymoon. And the literal definition of honeymoon means sweet month. A moon like the Indians, a moon is 28 days. Honeymoon is the sweet month. The next phase is disillusionment. Giggling, I heard the giggling. It's when you get in there and you go, wow, I didn't know he did that. Or wow, I didn't know she had that kind of breath in the morning. You know that kind of thing? That's disillusionment. And you go through that for a period of time. That's why they say the first year of marriage is usually the toughest. And then the last phase is reality. We're talking about reality, okay? you're going to have difference of opinions. There's a way to do it and a way not to do it. And there's a way to do it. And the fact is, you know, and if.