One question here that we'll touch on for a moment. It's a difficult question, to say the least, to answer with any kind of certainty, but we'll try to handle it anyway. Pastor Steele, should a Christian be a legal witness, best man, matron, or maid of honor for a non-Christian wedding or a liberal church? One of the things that we have to realize is that marriage is ordained of God. It was God's intention that both the believer and the unbeliever alike be married. And it's a matter, of course, of a personal choice on the part of those where there are two unbelievers. But I think that there are some guidelines in regard to which weddings we can give our blessing on. There are some things that are expressly given in Scripture, First of all, there is the matter that a believer is never to marry an unbeliever. And by my own personal conviction, I could never marry a believer to an unbeliever. I prefer as well, personally, not to marry two people who are unbelievers. It's my opinion that a civil wedding in such a case would do just as well. Now that may sound kind of harsh and cruel and crude, but the point is that I really feel that it is hypocrisy to ask the people to stand before you and make vows to God when they do not acknowledge God in a personal way. And therefore, you know, I have a problem with that. But as far as being a witness at a wedding for a friend who is an unbeliever, I think it would depend on what the circumstances were. If he were marrying a believer or the believer was marrying an unbeliever, I think that I would sit down with my friend and I would say, I've got a problem and here's my problem. What you're doing is a direct violation of scripture, and for me to stand and be a witness for you would seem to endorse that. Therefore, I couldn't do it. Another factor would be if the young people have parents' consent. If they don't have parents' consent, they're being disobedient to their parents, the wedding, the marriage is being based on rebellion. And because it's being based on rebellion, I would hesitate. to have part in it. Now, that's not to say that it does boil down, I should say, to say it positively. It boils down to a matter of personal conviction. I think you have to really be led of the Lord. You have to be careful that in any time where you would say, no, I won't stand as a witness because of this reason, that reason, the other reason, And I know a number of people that will not stand with someone who is marrying a divorced person. And that's a matter of personal taste, personal conviction. It's a matter of whether or not you can endorse what's being done. Because in essence, that's what you're doing when you are standing with others in a wedding ceremony. You're saying, this wedding has my personal blessing and endorsement. So you have to really be able to endorse it. But I would caution you to say this, that you can endorse a wedding where the bride and groom are both unbelievers. There's no reason why you can't, as long as there are not hypocrisies taking place. Now, in a civil ceremony, they go through the form of saying a few words, will you, and they wilt. just like that, you know, it's over with. And to stand for a witness or something like that, you are not committing yourself to anything. Now, on the other hand, in a liberal church where the Bible is not honored, where God is not honored, there may be things in the wedding ceremony that really are an outright denial of God's principles of marriage. And I would personally find it difficult to stand up under those circumstances with With an individual and put my endorsement on it. That's why I as a pastor can't marry two unbelievers simply because I by conviction believe wedding the wedding is an illustration a true illustration of Christ in the church that is in the church it is that illustration and I would have to stand there and say words that were meaningless to two unbelievers and And so it would be difficult to do this. Also, most unbelievers won't follow through with the counseling involved. Because I, in a case of two unbelievers, you see, I require that before I decide whether I can marry someone, I insist that they counsel with me a couple of times, and then I'll give them my decision afterward. And see, in the case of two unbelievers, I don't quit trying to lead them to the Lord until they make a decision. And therefore, you know, we come to a stalemate because I can't tell them I will marry them until I'm certain that what I say in the wedding ceremony goes true for these young people. And so, you know, I keep trying to lead them to the Lord and they usually get mad and leave me rather than me having to decide for them. Although I have had the privilege of counseling with and leading to the Lord a great many people who have come to me wanting to get married. And some of the most difficult things is where I have a couple in there and I start trying to lead them to the Lord. And then I lead the girl to the Lord and the guy won't budge. And then I have to tell the girl, you before God cannot marry this man. That's a tough one, isn't it? But we've done it and we've actually seen some real results in this. And it's not an easy matter. It's a tough thing. But remember that God ordained marriage and wants marriage to be stable even in the unbeliever's home, although his preference is that he be at the very center of it. And really, the unbeliever in this day and age especially has very little chance of making a success of marriage because marriages are taken so lightly today. I guess I would have to say as well that if the wedding ceremony did not include the definition of the roles, I would have a problem with that too, as far as being a witness. In other words, if the wife does not commit herself to be obedient to her husband, the husband does not commit himself to love his wife, then I would have a problem because they don't have a chance of making it. Without those principles, they'll last for a little while, but eventually the marriage will deteriorate. So, it's a matter of personal conviction. I hope those are some guidelines that will be of help to you. There's nothing definite in scripture, incidentally, in regard to this, because the person that is a witness is not really taking an oath. It doesn't constitute bearing false witness, incidentally. But there's no indication in scripture one way or another about standing up with people, because standing up with people was not a concept that is taught in scripture surrounding the wedding. There is the concept that was used in Judaism in the weddings. There were best man's and maid of honor and all the rest of it, just like we have today. But scripture is silent on what part the believer plays with the unbeliever in this regard. I found a little article I thought would kind of be interesting to you. Some people you know, I know a lot of single people go around moping, licking their wounds, saying how woeful it is to be single. And this struck me as being just something that might be an encouragement to you. I think one of the forgotten things is the fact that God has unique and special ministry for single people. If you're single, if you're divorced, If you're a widow, just remember that God has a special place of service for you. And in a very special and unique way, He can use you. I think in terms of Anna in the New Testament and how after her widowhood, she devoted herself to the ministry of the temple and had the privilege of seeing Jesus Christ. And I think that there's some real opportunity today especially in this regard. And this little article is in a missionary magazine. It says, remember Deborah, the respected prophetess in Judges 4. She was not only a prophetess and a wife, but a capable and courageous leader, used of God in an unusual way. I'm quite sure that she did not belong to the women's lib movement and fight for her right of equality to be in the position she was. There just did not seem to be a capable man available. So God used her, a woman. Such has been the situation in North Amazon field. When husbands are away and the few men on this field are on furlough, the Deborahs step in into responsibility. They not only cook and clean and some caring for their families, but they keep financial books, treat sick Indians, make village visits, teach Bible classes, produce literacy materials, teach reading, translate God's word, and even operate mission stations. A year ago there was a critical need for male workers because of furloughs and other circumstances. Had it not been for the Deborahs, three of the four Indian stations would have been closed. The Deborahs of North Amazon aren't shouting for equality with men. They're crying for men to do a man's job. God does use the Deborahs and the JLs, but where are the up-and-coming leader Joshua's and the humble farm boy Gideons, Miss Sandy Q., North Amazon, Brazil." I thought that was good. I think in terms of what Charles Ryrie says in his book on the women's role in the church, and he makes mention of the fact that The real test of a woman's willingness to do things God's way is not whether or not she's had to assume responsibility that should maybe be carried on by a man, say, on the mission field, but rather, is she willing, when a capable man comes along, to step aside and let him take over the responsibility? Sounds like these gals are certainly willing to do that, but they're shorthanded on the mission field today. And some of you gals know right now, you could pack your bags tomorrow and go to the mission field. Wouldn't be any reason in the world why you couldn't do that. You've got no strings, no strings attached. The only string you have is that faint hope that you have that you might find a husband somewhere. If you'd quit searching for a husband and start seeking for God's will, then you'd discover that God has some exciting plans for you. And I would just like to encourage you along that line. We're not trying to get rid of you. But believe me, don't sit around wondering why God hasn't brought some man into your life. Some man might slow you down. That's the case with my sister. There isn't a man in the world to keep up with my sister. She'd be, you know, it'd just be rough on her to slow down and try to stay with him, you know? Because God has called her to a unique ministry. And that's why she's single. And that's why God gave her a desire just to serve him at a very young age rather than wasting her time looking for a husband. And I would hate to think what would happen or what would have happened had Betty had the idea that she had to get a husband as soon as possible because she would have missed a lot of exciting adventure literally all over the world in her ministry for the Lord, see? And so don't be too quick to think that You've got to hurry up and get married. Some of you could give marvelous, marvelous years of your life to the Lord and serve Him on the mission field and still have a marriage and a happy home and everything in days to come. I don't know why I'm harping on this today, but I think in terms of the biography of Mary Slessor, Mary Slessor was on the mission field, and she had committed herself to reach the people of Kalador, and she met a young man out there by the name of Charles Morrison, Charles Morrison was also a missionary, and she wrote to her mission board. And of course, remember now in the chain of command that when a person puts themselves under a mission board, they put themselves under a chain of command just like you have with your parents. And she recognized this. In fact, I can't find right now the exact statement, but her statement, her letter to the mission board is very revealing in regard to her understanding of authority and chain of command. She would have made a great wife for some man. But Charles Morrison, and she wanted to be married, and so she wrote to her mission board and she said, when I came to Caledon, I came committed to a responsibility to serve the Lord and to put His work first. And I put myself under your authority And so I want to ask, may I marry this man? But if you say no, I want you to know that I will take that as the will of God. They wrote back and said, no, you can't marry him. Now don't ask me why, because I have no idea why, except later on it showed why. But they said no, that she could not marry. And as a result, Charles Morrison had a nervous breakdown. Some people say, well, it was the mission board's fault because they are the ones that said they couldn't marry. But I don't think that's the case at all. I think there was an innate weakness in Charles Morrison that after much prayer back at the mission station, though they didn't know the man, they were able to detect in some way God gave them direction. Because see, Mary Schleser carved out a place on that mission field for God. a work that even today reflects her very nature as a godly woman. She did a marvelous work for God in that mission field. And had they married and then he had the nervous breakdown, they both would have come home and no biography would have ever been written of Mary Schlesser. You see? So just be very, very careful. I know we have a number of single gals and you have to be very certain that it's God leading you into marriage and not just the social pressure that you've got to get married before 19 or you're an old maid. So don't yield to that. That, I think, is just a good word for us today. Let's have a word of prayer now. Father, we thank you so very much that you do give us direction and purpose for our lives. What a wide and fruitful ministry there can be for widows, for single people, for those that have had a tragedy in their marriage and are left alone. Father, we thank you that you can undertake for these individuals and give them a fruitful and abundant life. Help them, Lord, to see that what you want is that they seek first the kingdom of God, that they seek first His righteousness. And then all these things will be added on to them. Lord, we thank you for that bonus that we see from time to time, but we don't look for the bonus. We merely look to you for your direction because we want to someday hear your well done, thou good and faithful servant. That's more important to us than all the wealth and riches, even then all the happiness in the world. For we know that it will represent eternal happiness. as we hear what you want us to do and respond to it and then hear you're well done. So give us fruitful and productive lives. And even today, grant that we may have insight into your word. We're anxious, Lord, that these women be godly women. What a force in society they could be, how they could turn the world right side up in this day and age where there's so much confusion and so much upside down thinking. We pray, Father, that you will give us that force with these women. And grant, Father, that they will learn the secrets of godliness, the secrets of rightfully using their role. And most of all, we pray that they will be women that are devoted utterly to you and your purpose for their life. We'll praise you for it in Christ's name. Amen. Alright, now we're in James again, James chapter 3. May I say now that we have, for all practical purposes, worked this first verse to death. My brethren, my sisters, whoever, be not many teachers, knowing that we shall receive the greater judgment. You'll be judged by a much higher standard. I just wanted to say a couple of things as we close this thought out. First of all, let me remind you that you're to be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh concerning the hope that is in you with meekness and fear. You're always to be ready to share with others the word that is in your heart. One of the most significant passages of Scripture that I know of in regard to building a life's message is 2 Corinthians 1. 2 Corinthians 1 tells you that everything that you suffer is really a preparation for ministry. Everything that you suffer, every time you suffer, and every time you learn the secret of drawing upon God's resource to help you through that trial, every time you do that, And you do that every day of your life, don't you? Every little thing, every big thing that you suffer gives you that much more ability to empathize with others who are suffering similar problems and therefore qualifies you in a very effective sharing ministry. Now, the problem with a lot of people is that they have the suffering, they respond wrongly to it, and then they share that. and they bring a lot of confusion. What you really want to do is reach out and find God's solution, not your solution, not man's solution, but you want to find out God's solution to each of the fears that you have, each of the problems that you have, each of the questions that you have. And as you find them, they become a part of a life message that you can share with other individuals. And as you broaden your experiences with God, You will broaden your own ministry to other people and the circle of influence will increase. And so don't look at those difficult things as though they're intruders, as James says in his early chapter, but welcome them as friends. Realize that they've come to test your faith and to produce in you the quality of endurance. And if you realize this, if you recognize that everything that happened last week was designed by God to give you productivity and to widen and broaden your ministry, it'll make a whole lot of difference as far as your life is concerned. But every time you respond wrongly, you narrow your ministry because you alienate others, because you project your own bitterness. And so you see, then we become very introspective and very much looking inward rather than looking outward to the ministry that God has called us to. Now, in addition to that, I also wanted to mention, if you'll look with me just for a moment at the book of Jude. The book of Jude is before Revelation, just one chapter in length. has some descriptions concerning false teachers that I think would just be helpful just to explore them briefly. Beginning at verse 8. In like manner, even as Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed, he's now using that as a backdrop to teach these or to describe these false teachers. In like manner also, these filthy dreamers, That means what appears in the sleep, literally, a delusion. These deluded people defile or contaminate, soil the flesh. And here's a very key thing. They despise dominion. These are false teachers now. These are teachers that have gotten all fouled up. They may have had a bit of the truth. In fact, a bit of the truth comes out in their teaching. But they have made the truth of God into a lie. by simply making denials on certain things. And one of the things that is the first characteristic of a false teacher is that he despises or literally sets aside dominion. Now, dominion is kurios. And kurios means lordship. It means duly constituted authority. It's one of the chain of command words in scripture. You remember in 1 Peter 3, it tells us that women are to be submissive to their husband, and so on, and then it says, even like Sarah, calling your husband Lord. All right? Kurios. Calling your husband Lord. Now that's duly constituted authority. First of all, God. Secondly, His Word. Thirdly, government. then the husband, then the wife, the child, and so on. Now, one of the first things that happens when a child thinks that he is a teacher, when he thinks that he's the master, is he begins to overthrow authority. But he's a false teacher. He's immature and he'll lead people astray. But you know, one of the things that happens to women when they begin to think that they're God's answer to mankind as far as their ability to teach, is that they overthrow the authority above them. You usurp authority. When you begin to teach your husband, you begin to tell him what he ought to do and how he ought to live, then you are usurping God's authority. And you're a false teacher. See? Now, this is a characteristic of these false teachers. They despise. They lay aside. Despise doesn't mean you hate it. Despise means you lay it aside. You lay aside duly constituted authority. That's one thing they do. Then they speak evil of dignitaries. They blaspheme, literally, those that demand or those that command respect. Doxa is the word. Daksa means glory and it means repute, honor. And remember that it says in Ephesians 5 that women are to reverence their husband, Daksa. You see, these false teachers are characterized by not only the fact that they've got delusions, not only the fact that they pollute the flesh, but they also lay aside authority And they blaspheme, they speak evil, of those that should be respected. Again, having to do with authority. Now, if you jump down through verse 10, let me just read this. But these speak evil of those things which they know not. They don't even know what they're talking about, but they're still talking about them. But what they know naturally, There it is again, this psuchikos idea, that which they sense. I just got the feeling. I just got the feeling that God wants me to divorce my husband. If I've heard that once, I've heard it a thousand times. I've just got the feeling. And really, I've had ladies say, I don't care what the Bible says. I know I'm in the will of God. I've just got this feeling. Now that's responding emotionally. And you see, that is another characteristic. They're not teaching those things they know. They don't know what they're talking about. But they're going on the basis of their natural instinct. Those things which they know naturally, those things they can reason with their mind, those things that they can feel in their heart, those things are the things. And women, you know, have real intuition. They have real insight. But if you do not take your woman's intuition and compare it with Scripture, Then you see you'll be led astray by your own ability to know things intuitively. As brute beasts, as animals now, they just really become like animals. In those things, they corrupt themselves. Woe unto them! For they've gone in the way of Cain, which speaks of salvation by human works. Remember I said that a lot of women started cults. And most cults believe in salvation by human works. The way of Cain is the way of salvation by human works. It's what we can call approbation lust. It's the idea of wanting to be recognized. They go the way of Cain, wanting to be recognized, and ran greedily after the error of Balaam. Balaam was materialism lust, for Balaam went to natural reasoning. There was no understanding of grace. The story of Balaam is a story back in the book of Numbers, where Balak wanted the people of Israel condemned. And Balaam, who was a prophet of God, reasoned that the people of Israel weren't so hot after all. They weren't perfect. And since they weren't perfect, maybe he could curse them. But they didn't reckon on the fact that God was dealing with the people of Israel in grace. And so his condemnation, of course, didn't work. And what he did it for was for gain. He just wanted it for the money that he would get after it. So ran greedily after the heir of Balaam for reward. That again is a characteristic of this false teacher. And perished in the gainsaying of Korah. Now there was a denial of authority for Korah denied the authority of Moses. And that's the power lust that is here. So you have a wanting, a desire to be recognized. You have a desire to get something out of it. You have a desire to have power. All of these things are involved in these false teachers. So you have a wanting, a desire to be recognized. You have a desire to get something out of it. You have a desire to have power. All of these things are involved in these false teachers. Now notice what it says about them. They are spots in your love feasts, when they feast with you, feeding themselves without fear. Clouds are they without water, carried about by the winds. Trees whose fruit withereth without fruit, twice dead, plucked up by the roots. Raging waves of the sea, foaming out their own shame. Wandering stars, to whom is reserved the blackness of the darkness forever. And Enoch also, the seventh from Adam, prophesied of these. Even way back at Enoch, he said these kind of guys would be around. Then he said, Behold, the Lord cometh with ten thousands of his saints to execute judgment upon all, and to convict all that are ungodly among them of their ungodly deeds which they have ungodly committed, and of all their hard speeches which ungodly sinners have spoken against them. These are murmurers, complainers, walking after their own lusts, their mouths speaking great swelling words, having men's persons in admiration because of advantage. But beloved, remember ye the words which were spoken before by our apostles of the Lord Jesus Christ, how they told you that there should be mockers in the last time who would walk after their own ungodliness. These are they who separate themselves, sensual, having not the spirit." False teachers don't ever be a false teacher. Remember, you're going to be judged by a much higher standard. I think of Paul's words in Acts chapter 20 where he said that he was free of the blood of all men. Do you know why he was free of the blood of all men? Because I declared unto you the whole counsel of God. He declared the truth of the word of God in its entirety to these people. Now we said that the reason that James puts this word, puts this verse right here in this third chapter is primarily because the teacher has to be especially careful of the things that he says. Tongue control is the most important thing in regard to the matter of teaching. And so it's our purpose now to consider the importance of tongue control And to go on in this text and see some of the things involved in this little member that we call our tongue. Let me just read a little bit for you in verse 2 following. For in many things we all stumble. If any man stumble not in word, the same is a perfect man. and able also to bridle the whole body. Behold, we put bits in the horse's mouth that they may obey us, and we turn about their whole body. Behold also the ships, which though they are so great are driven by fierce winds, yet are they turned about with a very small helm wherever the pilot willeth. Even so, the tongue is a little member and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth." Now I want to make it very clear. that women don't have any more problem with this than men. I know there's a lot of jokes about that, the fact that women can't quit talking. And I think women talk differently than men. They go about it in a little different way, but this is equally true for men and women. So when I talk here about the woman's tongue, I'm not talking exclusively about the woman, but I am going to talk about the woman's tongue because I'm talking to women. If I were talking to a mixed group, I'd make it clear it's for both. If I were talking to men, I'd make it clear it was for them, just as much as it's for everyone else. But I want you to understand that because I don't want you to think I'm picking on you. The Word of God is very clear, though, that we do have a problem with the tongue. Perhaps you remember hearing the story of a fellow that came into a restaurant and ordered cold coffee, burnt toast and a fried egg that was so hard you couldn't cut it with a knife. And the waitress brought it to him and put the mess down in front of him and then said, is there anything else? He says, yes. Will you sit down and nag me? I'm homesick. It's been suggested that that's not likely to happen. In fact, the fellow would probably make another kind of request of the waitress if indeed he was nagged at home. And that's where some of the problem lies. We have to be very, very careful that we control our tongue. So look at verse two, and we'll get rolling on this. For in many things. All right, now we have the word P-O-L-L-A, Paula, which is from P-O-L-U-S, polus, which means many. It's used especially of number. It's a neuter gender, so it would be many things. It could be translated often as well. The particle gar, which means for, for often. We offend all. We all stumble, literally. Here's the word P-T-A-I-O-M-E-N. And it means to stumble against. The same root was used over in chapter 2 and verse 10 where it says there, whosoever shall keep the whole law and yet offend in one point. Stumble against or to stumble. Over in Jude 24, now unto him who is able to keep you from falling. It's translated falling in that text. And so that actually is with a negative in front of it to keep you from falling, negative falling. And so it's used in the classical Greek for the idea of slipping and thus to fall or used in the sense of going into error or falling into error. The word all here is A-P-A-N-T-E-S. Apontes, it means all-inclusive. We all stumble. It means everybody. It means there are no exceptions, really. There are no exceptions to this rule. Every one of us, at some time or another, stumble. Now, that's very clear in Scripture. Ecclesiastes chapter 7 verse 20 says, There is not a just man upon the earth that doeth good and sinneth not. And that's a true statement. In 1 John 1, verse 10, it's very clear that we do sin. And the Bible says there that if we say we don't sin, we're deceiving ourselves and we're lying. Really, we all do sin. We all fall into sin. The Lord Fisher once said that life is a path strewn with orange peel. Or perhaps better in our modern parlance, we might say strewn with banana peel. The point is, we walk a slippery road. We do fall. There are none of us that are perfect. None of us that make no mistakes. And I include men in that as well as women, and I especially include this preacher. It's easy, easy, easy to make mistakes. I want to point out a couple of other things here in that regard. Over in Job, if you'll turn to that, Job chapter 40 and verse 4. Behold, Job says, I am vile. What shall I answer thee? I will lay my hand upon my mouth. Once I have spoken, but I will not answer. Yea, twice, but I will proceed no further. In essence, in the modern idiom, Job would be saying here, I've already said too much. I'm going to keep my big mouth shut. That's what he's saying. I'm going to put my hand over my mouth. I've already said too much. Look over at Isaiah chapter 6. Isaiah chapter 6. Look at verses 5 through 7. Then said I, that is Isaiah speaking now, Woe is me, for I am undone, because I am a man of unclean lips. I remember that what he had seen was in the year that King Uzziah died, he saw the Lord high and lifted up, and he saw the holiness inquired concerning his beauty and all of this, and he saw the glory of God, saw the temple filled with the Shekinah glory of God, and immediately his reaction was, I'm a sinful man. Notice the emphasis on the lips, even as Job had emphasis on the mouth. He said, For I am undone, because I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips. For mine eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts, and then flew one of the seraphim unto me, having a live coal in his hand. which he had taken with the tongs from off the altar. And he laid it upon my mouth, and said, Lo, this hath touched thy lips, and thine iniquity is purged away, and thy sin is purged. And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I, send me." Now, realize this, ladies, today, We all sin, and the emphasis of this passage is that we especially have a problem sinning with our lips. But God in that day recognized. He didn't deny that Isaiah was right in his appraisal of himself and the people. I'm a man of unclean lips. I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips. God didn't deny that. And God doesn't deny that you make mistakes and that you fall. God doesn't deny that. He knows that. We all make mistakes. There are a lot of you that have difficult circumstances in your home, and you know what's right. You know how you ought to respond to a husband that's not treating you the way he should. You know what God's way is, and yet the natural way seems so much more natural, so much easier sometimes to fight back and be contentious. rather than continuing to have a meek and quiet spirit. And a lot of times you sin with your lips. You know that. God knows that. But what God wants to do is, even as He did with Isaiah, He wants to take those coals from off the fire and He wants to place it upon your lips, upon your tongue. And he wants to help you in this regard. Our study in this third chapter of the book of James, I hope is really going to be a help for a lot of you that have really a problem with saying the wrong thing. The good old fashioned hoof and mouth disease. You actually should mix your toothpaste with your shoe polish because you've got your foot in the mouth most of the time. And God wants to help you with that problem. And He can help you with that problem. He can take those coals from off the altar where the sacrifice has been made. You see, Jesus Christ made provision so that you don't have to sin unadvisedly with your lips. Do you realize that Moses was the meekest man that ever lived? And meekness, you recall, is an inwrought grace of the soul whereby an individual recognizes that God's dealings with him are good. Therefore, he accepts them without disputing, without resistance. God wants a woman to be meek. Moses was the meekest man that ever lived. And Moses went through 40 awful years of bickering, fighting people, constantly keeping peace with them. But he didn't get to go into the promised land. Do you know why he didn't get to go into the Promised Land? Well, let me show you. Look, if you will, at Psalm 106. Look at verse 33. This is reviewing the history of the people of Israel. Let's read verse 32. They angered him also at the waters of strife, so that it went ill with Moses for their sakes. Because they provoked his spirit, so that he spoke unadvisedly with his lips. How many of you have never spoken unadvisedly with your lips? My hand's not up. Moses had all of the hope of eternal life. He did have that. He didn't lose that. He had all of the joy of having a, what we would term a successful ministry. And yet the one thing in life that his heart desired The greatest thing to Moses was to be able to lead those people to that final victory in the promised land. And he never realized his earthly ambition because he spoke unadvisedly with his lips. Now, if you talk back to your husband, you're not going to go to hell. The only thing that will send you to hell is rejection of the Lord Jesus Christ as your personal Savior at a point of time. If you've received Christ as Savior, then talking back to your husband is not going to condemn you. It will not damn you. It's not going to mean that you can't have a certain amount of happiness, because there's a certain amount of happiness to be had. It doesn't mean that you can't have a ministry. But I'll guarantee you, the one thing that is the greatest to you, the thing that you want more than anything else, that one little promised land that is the big thing in your life will never be fully realized if you speak unadvisedly with your lips. You will short circuit God's best for you. And you can be certain of that. You say, well, couldn't God forgive Moses for what he did? Certainly he could. Do you want to know what Moses did? I'll tell you something. It's a very significant thing. The crime that Moses had in speaking on advisory with his lips and also the striking of the rock was that he ruined and spoiled one of God's types. God had made a type out of that rock. The point was this, the first time they came to the rock, Moses spoke to the rock, or excuse me, struck the rock, and the water ran out. The New Testament tells us that rock was Christ. All right? The water ran out. Next time they came to the rock, the Lord instructed Moses, don't hit the rock this time, speak to the rock. That rock is Christ. The striking of the rock spoke of the death of the Lord Jesus Christ. The speaking to the rock spoke of the continuing intercessory ministry of the Lord Jesus Christ. New Testament makes this clear. Moses struck the rock a second time. In type, that was the equivalent of recrucifying Christ. And it ruined his type. You say, well, what does that have to do with me? Very simple. Do you know what another one of God's types? The church as the bride of Christ is represented in type by your marriage. Did you know that? Do you realize that in the book of Ephesians chapter five, the last verse of that chapter says, this is a great mystery. Next to the last verse, I guess. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Most people think that Christ and the church are used as an illustration of the marriage. But what that verse straightens us out on is that your marriage is to illustrate Christ and the church. Your marriage is to show a relationship that is correct in every regard. so that your role in this is to demonstrate how submissive the church should be to Christ. And whenever you do not obey in that role, you speak unadvisedly with your lips, then you know what happens? You spoil God's type. God does not take that lightly. And there are many Christian homes that have just decided to do it their own way rather than God's way. And they are ruining God's type. They will never enter into the promised land of God's ultimate blessing because they speak unadvisedly with their lips. All right, now remember that you are teachers and you have to be careful of what you say. and you particularly are going to have a problem in the area of the tongue. We all sin, we all fall, but especially we fall in the area of the tongue. I want you to look again at Matthew chapter 26 for a moment. Look at verse 69. Now Peter sat outside in the court, and a maid came unto him, saying, Thou also wast with Jesus of Galilee. And he denied it before them all, saying, I know not what thou sayest. When he was gone out into the porch, another maid saw him and said unto him that were there, this fellow was also with Jesus of Nazareth. And again he denied it with an oath, I do not know this man. After a while came unto him they that stood by and said to Peter, Surely thou art also one of them, for thy speech betrayeth thee. Then he began to curse and swear, saying, I know not the man. And immediately the cock crowed. And Peter remembered the word of Jesus, who said to him before the cock crows, Thou shalt deny me thrice. And he went out and wept bitterly." Peter was a good man in many ways, but Peter had a problem that we have. He should have shut up or else he should have said the right thing. But to stand there and deny and to lie was the wrong thing. It proves again that we can sin unadvisedly with our lips. If you ever thought maybe we could just turn to it over in 1 Peter 3 for a moment. It says, you wives, be in subjection to your own husbands, that if any obey not the word, they also may without literally a word, not the word, but a word, without a word, without preaching to them, without saying anything to them, may be won by the behavior of the wives. All right, now, I want you to think for a moment, though, about that, but I want you to place it in the context. look at those words in the same manner. Now that points us backward into the second chapter. I want you to look at the second chapter. It says, In verse 20, for what glory is it if when you're buffeted for your faults, you should take it patiently? If you do something wrong, this is what happens a lot of times, wives say, well, I'm being submissive to my husband, and then they tell, that here they haven't been the kind of wives they should be, and their husbands are getting back at them for that, and they're taking it patiently, and they think that's really a big deal. because they're suffering for Jesus' sake, you know? They're really suffering for their own sin. They're suffering for their own stubbornness, their own willfulness. You have to be super careful in this regard that you remember that there's suffering that's deserved and suffering that's undeserved. And undeserved suffering comes because of your own stupidity. Or deserved suffering comes because of your own stupidity. Undeserved suffering comes as a blessing from God. And so he's making a distinction here between the undeserved and the deserved suffering. What glory is it if you're buffeted for what you do wrong, your faults, and you take that patiently? There's no big deal about that. But if when you do well, if you do things God's way and still suffer for it, And you take that patiently, this, it says, is acceptable with God. The word is charis, literally grace. This is grace. This is a demonstration, a reproduction of God's grace. When you don't do anything wrong, and you really, your husband really takes it out on you, And he buffets you for what you've done right. You've got the house clean. You've fixed him good meals. You've been a loving wife. And your husband just is ruthless to you. And you take that patiently. That is a demonstration of grace. You are an illustration, a living illustration of God's grace. But now look further. This is gonna excite you. For even here unto where you called, How many of you knew that you were called of God to suffer? That's what this text says. For even here unto where you're called, you're to live your life right. You're to do the right thing. And when you do the right thing and there is suffering for it, then you're to take it patiently and trust God. And when you take it patiently, it's a demonstration of God's grace, and it is God's purpose, it is God's call of you to go through that whole sequence. That's exactly what this text is saying, but it goes on even more. Because, here is the key, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example that you should follow in His steps. Now, that does not mean that we are to follow Christ's example and that brings salvation. That's not what it's talking about here. It's saying that Christ is an illustration that teaches us how to suffer properly. Want to know how to suffer properly? Here it is. Who did no sin. When he suffered, he didn't sin. He's perfect. Let him reproduce that in your life. Neither was guile found in his mouth. Talking about the tongue again. No guile in his mouth. Who when he was reviled, he reviled not again. When he suffered, he threatened not. Now most women, and men, but most women, since I'm talking to you, violate these very principles. Guile, hypocrisy is found in your mouth. And when you're reviled, you revile again. After all, if he says something to me, I'm gonna say something back. Some of you know what I'm talking about there. It's just, I'm not gonna be a doormat. I'm not gonna let people walk on me. And if he says something, well, he's gonna get it back. All right? That's reviling. Christ didn't do that. When he suffered, he threatened not. If you do that again, I'm gonna leave you. You do that again, I'm not gonna cook you supper anymore. You do that, something else, you know? You threaten because you aren't as strong physically and you can't punch him out. You find other ways and you threaten him. I'm gonna get you for that. All right? Now, isn't that the attitude? But see, Christ, when he suffered, never threatened. But what did he do? Now get this. He deposited himself to him that judgeth righteously. He took himself and he placed himself in God's hands. He said, I'm trusting you to work it out without my help. See, Christ had the power to come down from that cross. From the standpoint of his divine power, he could have come down from the cross. Can you imagine what he could have done to those men that were hitting him? To those that were falsely accusing him? You know, zap! Just like that, he could have wiped them all out. He had the power to do that. He didn't do it. He rested himself in the hands of God. Now, you see, in this regard, we get sidetracked. This is why very seldom do people notice what the context is here. Because then it goes on and tells us some good things about Christ, who his own self bore our sins in his own body on the tree, that we being dead to sin should live unto righteousness by whose stripes you were healed. For ye were as sheep going astray, but are now returned unto the shepherd and bishop of your souls." And in the process of those two verses, we kind of lose the thought that Christ was giving us an example of how to suffer. But the author didn't forget. He says, in like manner, you wives. Later on, in like manner, you husbands. When you suffer, What are you to do? When you're suffering, you don't threaten. When you're reviled, you don't revile again. When you speak, there's no guile found in your mouth, no deceit found in your mouth. And what do you do? You commit yourself to him who judges righteously. You say, boy, that's a tough, tough thing. The problem is one basic problem, tongue control. Most of you don't have much of a problem with doubling up your fist and trying to hit your husband. You know that the weapon that you use most of the time is your tongue. And you know that there are many times where you've gone into your bedroom and wept because of things you've said that you knew you shouldn't have said. And you see, this text is gonna help us. Get those tongues under control. God does have an answer. The tongue can no man tame. But as we read in the book of Isaiah chapter six, God can take the tongues from off the altar. He can place them upon your lips. You see, Jesus Christ died for your sin. He died for the sin of your tongue. just as surely as he died for the other sins. It's for the very purpose of the death of Christ. This very purpose is the purpose for which Christ died. Christ gave his life so that you could have a controlled tongue, so that there could be the inner spring of your life changed, so that out from it comes beautiful words. sweet words, kind words, understanding words, words that are not harsh and cruel, because from the same fountain can't come both blessing and cursing. Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaketh. And God wants us to understand the tongue, and then he wants us to understand the way that the tongue can be controlled. And we want to understand then as well that when the tongue is controlled, a great many other things in our lives are controlled. And so let's bow, shall we, for a moment? And let's just take a moment to talk to the Lord. Let's just ask Him, can we? Lord Jesus, please, I recognize I have unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips. And Lord, right now, I want you to take the coal from off the altar, and I want you to cleanse my tongue. I want to concentrate my life upon those things that are wholesome and right. So I want to consecrate my tongue to you. Will you pray that prayer right now?