We are in 1 Peter this morning, continuing to look at Peter's instruction to wives and husbands. Even though we're spending three weeks on wives and one on husbands, it's not because wives need more than husbands. It's because Peter saves one verse for husbands. At the end, they're in verse seven, which we'll look at in two weeks. And so we're considering verses three and four, as we looked at one and two last week, but I'll read the first four verses. Hear now God's holy word, congregation. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husband so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives. When they see your respectful and pure conduct, Do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry or a clothing you wear, but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious. Amen. When we come to this middle section on beauty and what true beauty is, remember the context that Peter is addressing Christian wives in the church with non-Christian husbands, which was very common in the first century as Christianity expanded. And because of what was expected of husbands and wives in those days, that would have caused a very tense situation at home, as we said last week. Husbands were expected to be able to control their wives, and to tell them how to worship and what to worship. And it was expected that the wives and husbands would worship the same gods together. But once the woman had been converted and worshipped Christ and not the gods of her husband, that would have created a very tense situation at home. And so Peter's first response is if they're tempted to divorce, that that's not the answer. The answer is to go and be a good wife to your husband. And if they're tempted to preach at their husband or to always try to explain the gospel when they have already said no, they don't want it, Peter says don't do that either. Instead, by your character, by your conduct as a good wife, let them see what the gospel has done to you. And then you will win him without a word, Lord willing, is the goal. And without a word would mean he sees that you're different. And that you serve a different master for a different reason, and your character is different. To the point that they would ask the question, what happened to my wife? Remember, she's newly converted. She would have been worshipping likely with him earlier, whatever gods he worshipped. And so what changed my wife? And the goal then, Peter says, is for them to see by your conduct your new faith. Now in that context, Peter continues, and do not let your adornment be. Now obviously, Peter is not in themselves against these things. As if he's saying, do not ever wear jewelry. Because at the end, notice he says, even clothing. He's not saying don't wear clothing, obviously. And so he's talking about marriage. And so the question would be, why does Peter introduce adornment here when he's talking about Christian wives with non-Christian husbands? Well, in Roman culture, and you probably know if you've ever studied the art of Roman culture, looks were very important. Appearances were very important. You certainly see that in the art and the sculptures. And so it would be tempting for the Christian wife to think, if I want to win my husband back on my side, I'll do it through appearance. I'll do it through looking as good as I can look outwardly in order to please him because that's what people valued, not unlike today. And so maybe if I can be the most attractive wife I can be every day, I can ease the tension at home. Peter's response to that is, do not spend your energy with outward things. That is not the beauty that he should be seen. Now, it would take hours, by the way, where it says gold braids. That would take hours to do. And so it would be somebody who's really dedicating much of their day to looking just right. And so, Peter is saying, your husband may value that which is outward and external, but you don't have to play that game. You don't have to adopt his values of what is beautiful. That's not the attractiveness you should be worrying about. For one, we see in verse 4, that is perishable. Looks fade. They are of this old creation. Your husband may be shallow enough that that would win him over, but do not adopt those shallow values to do so. There's nothing wrong with looking nice for your husband. The point is, do not rely on appearance to win him over, is what Peter is saying. Instead, show him what true beauty is. And notice how he defines true beauty here. That which is the hidden person of the heart. Now it's hidden because it's produced by the Holy Spirit and you cannot see the Holy Spirit inside Christians. It's also hidden because to carnalize it doesn't matter. What matters is how you look. Peter says, but let them see that which is truly beautiful and that which is what the Holy Spirit produces inside your heart. Now for those of you like me who grew up in the public schools, you know that appearances mean a lot. And it can be a very cruel world to realize how differently people are treated based on appearances. That's the values of this old world. And Peter says, I don't want you as a Christian to adopt those values. to try to ease the tension with your non-Christian husband. Let the beauty you focus on, the beauty he sees, be, and then he writes, a gentle and quiet spirit. That word gentle in the Greek is the word meek. Blessed are the meek, it's the same word, for they shall inherit the earth. Now men are to be meek also, so it's not excluding men in other contexts. But here it's let them see your humble or meek attitude. Quiet doesn't mean the amount of words you say. The word really references peaceful or even friendly at times in the New Testament. And so, it's another way of saying, he may be harsh, but don't match his harshness with returning harshness. If he yells at you, do not yell back. Do not match his anger with yours, his vindictiveness with yours. Commentator Peter Davids, he writes, gentle in the Greek world was an amiable friendliness that contrasted with roughness or bad temper. In biblical perspective, the term indicates a person who does not attack back with vengeance or bitterness. But the term quiet then conveys a sense of calmness, of being peaceful opposed to rebellious. So oftentimes we talk about in the church men who are abusive to women, and that's a huge problem. But sometimes it's the opposite. Sometimes the power person is the woman in the home, and the man is walking on eggshells with his wife. And so in that sense, she's the one, by her own attitude, is making things difficult. Peter says, don't overpower him that way to get what you want either. Let them see a gentle. and friendly spirit in you as you seek to be a good wife. That is true beauty and you want him to see that which is truly beautiful in God's sight. And notice how Peter ends that verse, that which is precious in God's sight. You might have expected him to write, that will be precious in your husband's sight. Show him true Christian beauty and he will love it. Well, he doesn't say that because the husband may not appreciate true inward Christian beauty. But who does appreciate it? God. This type of beauty is precious in God's sight, Peter writes. Whether your husband cares or not, you don't really live for him anymore. You live for Christ. And so here is what God considers beautiful. Not outward, but what is inward. Proverbs 31 30 says, charm is deceptive, beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Now, where does this inward hidden beauty come from, this meek and gentle spirit? Well, it comes through believing in the gospel, believing in Christ for salvation. What is meekness? Meekness is admitting I am a sinner. I do not deserve any good from God. So in meekness you're accepting the truths of the gospel as it is explained in the Bible. I live by God's grace. because I am not better than others. That's a meek attitude. And when my husband does things that are not right or he deserves worse, the meek person remembers I deserve judgment from God too. I need to be careful in how I treat others. And then where does the kindness come from? Well, Christ is kind to me and I sin against him every day. And so it's God's love, his kindness through the gospel that is now in us. And so there's no way to sort of produce a beautiful spirit. You must go to God for it. And when you believe in the gospel, that is what results in your life. You have a meek and gentle spirit. from the gospel, from a new heart. Your original heart in the Bible is called a heart of stone. It was a dead, cold heart. It was ugly to God. But when you believe in Christ, he gives you a new heart. It's a heart of flesh. That new nature is now beautiful to God. Think of it this way. When God looked at the first creation, what did he say? He says, it is good, or it is very good. When he looks at you as a new creation in Christ, he says, now that's beautiful. And that's what Peter says here. When God sees that which he has created through the gospel, he says, that's beautiful. Look what I have done. through the Holy Spirit and through Christ's death and resurrection. God calls that beautiful. And notice how Peter ends, it's costly or precious to God. Man values money, appearance, outward things. God values that which he produces through the gospel in sinners. And so Peter is saying, your husband may value the outward, But don't be tempted to play his game. Don't be tempted to try to be accepted by him through your looks. But show him what true beauty is that God produces. Show him so he sees what God really values. Now that's the summary of the text. I'm going to close with five points from this text. The first one, when it concerns clothing, it seems whenever women's clothing is brought up in the church, it's always men saying, you women have to be careful what you wear for us. That's not a biblical concept at all. And so lust, men, is your responsibility. It's not the responsibility of anyone else. It comes from your heart, James says. Nobody can cause you to lust. Remember in Muslim countries where we have a huge problem with sexual assault and lust, women are covered head to toe. And so it's not about what others do or wear. It's about the heart. If you love people with Christ's love, then you do not lust after them. So when you have a problem with that, men, do not blame anyone else. Go to God and ask for forgiveness to give you a mind and heart that is Christ-like. The answer is always to repent and go to Christ, not to blame others. Secondly, now I know that first point is so not what you've heard, so we can talk more about that privately if that's new to you. Secondly, when the subject of dress comes up in the New Testament, you have to decide as a Christian what's proper to wear. The Bible always focuses on motivation. It's why you dress that matters. In our passage, it's not whether you wear these things. Matter of fact, there would certainly be times for the wife, the Christian wife, to dress like this. Let's say you're in a wealthy family and they're hosting someone important. That's how you dress. You braided your hair. You put on your gold jewelry. It was a very nice dinner. That would be expected. But notice Peter's concern is not with what you wear, but why you would wear it. If the purpose of what you wear is to show off, and that can be show off financially, Because that's how dress was looked at in the Greek Roman world. How much money you had, you wanted to show that off in your dress. If that's why you're doing it, or even to seduce, if that's why you're doing it, then it becomes sinful. So if you're asking yourself, is it proper to wear something, the first question to ask yourself is, why am I doing it? That's really the key question more than the details. Third. Now that we know what true beauty is, that is the beauty you should be seeking. If in God's eyes what is beautiful is a meek and gentle spirit, and Christ himself said, I am meek and gentle. If that is what being Christ-like is, then a regular prayer you can have is give me a heart, give me an inner character that reflects Christ. I want to be beautiful to God too. Now he makes us that already in the new heart, but we grow in maturity and we ask him to make us beautiful to him. So that's the beauty, Peter says, to think about, to pray about, to have as a goal. When that ugliness comes out, that flesh takes over, you can confess it and ask for forgiveness. Fourthly, the hidden, the true beauty of God is hidden from the world. And so don't expect them to be impressed. Don't expect them to care too much because the world has a different value system. And that's the way the world considered Christ. It says in Isaiah 53, no form or outer appearance did he have that we should desire him. Christ outwardly was not impressive. He was not beautiful to the world. And because of that, the world rejected him. But when you see him going to the cross in the scripture, what do you see? You see beauty. You see a man dying for your sins. You see God's love for you. What the world thinks is nothing with their value system, you see is beautiful. And so by valuing Christ, you have rejected the world system. And so don't expect them to appreciate what you appreciate. You are operating on two extremely different views of what beauty is. And that brings us to our fifth and final point. How we treat each other in the body of Christ should always reflect the values of the new creation. The values of God and not the values of the world. And so we should not treat each other differently based on outward appearance at all. We should value the inward character of the heart. That's what we're impressed with. That's what's important to us. That old system is under judgment, valuing people by how they look. Now, women can do this, but men can do this too, or we can value men wrongly. James brings up an example, right? A rich man in a business suit comes into church. Everybody likes that, and so after church, everybody's welcoming them. But a poor 18-year-old comes in sitting alone, and he's not impressive how he looks, and most of the people stay away. And James says, don't treat people differently based on appearance. Those are the values of the old world you've been redeemed from. That type of thing shouldn't happen in the body of Christ. And so here, what matters is the beauty of what Christ brings in the heart, not how people look or how they dress. We should show the world what true beauty is. not only by what's important to us, but how we treat one another. And so may God, through this passage, teach us what true beauty is, may it be found in what Christ has done in the gospel, and may unbelievers see our new value system in Christ. What is really important to us is that which lasts forever through the gospel. Amen. Let's pray.