Before we dive into Genesis 33, just a point or two. If you're a visitor, and I neglected to do this, we'd be delighted if A, you'd either fill out one of the visitor cards in the pew in front of you, or within the bulletin, you'll see a QR code that you can scan and respond that way. We'd love to know more about you. We'd love to meet you. Then also in the back of the bulletin, you'll notice a date for the couple's drop-in shower. Actually, so that's a church-wide shower for John and Christy Van Steenburg as they're due. with a little baby girl at the end of May, but note, focus on the event. The date may have some wiggle, and we just weren't quite sure about that this morning, but if you'll note, hey, there is a baby shower coming up for them, that'd be great, and then we'll square up the date on that, I think, very shortly. Well, if we can turn back to Genesis 3, 33, and as we'll consider this text, let's not miss the table in front of us, and so the idea of preparing our hearts to together proclaim the Lord's death until he comes. It's a communion meal that's a meal of remembrance, and we're gonna do that together in about 40 minutes, hopefully, so just to prepare your hearts for that. Well, tonight's message I've entitled Reconciled or Not? And you know that sometimes distance is simply more easy or easier than nearness, and we're tempted to remain from and to be in conflict with others. I thought I'd do this, and you don't need to do this big hand raising, but I wanna ask a question that will help us get a sense of this. Who would say by the raise of your hand that there is someone that you feel a degree of separateness from or brokenness in your relationship? that either it's totally broken and you'd like it to be reconciled, or a relationship you once had is not what it was, and there's been some mileage, some challenges, some issues, and you wish that things were better. Who would say, if you're in any one of those categories, you could raise your hand? I'm gonna raise mine, that's okay. Just wanna look around. Yeah, and I probably saw 12 or 14 hands Part of the brokenness of our world in the fall of sin is this separating, this isolation, the broken relationship, coldness, iciness. And it brings us to our big idea, and that is that every attempt at human reconciliation makes us long for the perfect reconciliation, which is only available through the cross. And so later tonight, when we take communion together, I'll actually take us to the end of 2 Corinthians 5, where five times you find some form of the word reconciliation or the verb to reconcile. And so that the theme of our communion will be that when we proclaim the Lord's death until he comes, we proclaim a reconciling death, that through the blood of his cross, the Son of God made peace and so that we're a reconciled people. And we might say that the way to the Father is to make peace with or through his Son. And Ethan, as Jesus has said in John 14, six, I am the way and the truth and the life. And he says, no one comes to the Father except through me. We'll see later how the way from Haran for Jacob, the way all the way back to Bethel is going to take him through this meeting, this moment of reconciliation, this day of coming together with Esau. There's no way to go ultimately from Haran to Bethel without that. You might have heard something like this, those two just can't get along. Or, we've always had a rocky relationship. We're constantly at odds. Those two would fight about anything. They can't find anything to agree about. And the world is full of men and women, boys and girls who are in conflict. Even teachers know sometimes. that they need to put one student here and one student there. Even homeschooling parents recognize that the dynamics sometimes that they need to have a little spacing between their children. And that's not because they're human, but because they're fallen humans. They're in need of a savior, right? And we talk, when you think about all the ways that brokenness in relationship looks like and that we need to be reconciled, it's many colors. It's like this collage of brokenness. We talk past one another. We listen poorly. Yesterday I was on a phone call with a brother. And he was going on and on and on. And I tried to, I think he was giving me a little bit of a picture of what it must be like to talk to me. And it was humbling. And he had that moment where he said, I think I should stop and listen to you. I think I need to stop and listen to you. And I paused like, oh great, okay, you take a breath and I'll talk. But we sometimes talk past one another. We listen poorly. We won't forgive. We put the worst possible construction or we assign motives to what others do rather than simply looking at what they've done. It's as though we have an x-ray machine and can read their mind and understand what's moving them on their inside. But there's something we never fumble. There's something that we have a firm grip on often that is a grudge. and Grudge's first cousins, resentment, bitterness, and unforgiveness. On Friday at about three, I'm thinking over this message. I was really almost done with this sermon largely, and I just paged Jamie and I said, can you believe this? You're gonna be in Romans 12, 14 through 16. I'm gonna be in Genesis 33. You're gonna be talking about bless those who persecute you, bless and do not curse, all this. and I'm gonna be with Esau and Jacob. I said, only God could orchestrate you coming to Romans 12, 14, and 16 and me hitting Genesis 13 and us intersecting there on this day, all right? But we often live in this stony silence. We won't talk about the thing. the elephant in the room, or acknowledge that our relationship was once warmer, more affectionate, more caring, and that we were more interested. Sometimes we'll say, we'll look to each other and we'll say, man, I was really wrong, please forgive me. And instead of saying, of course I will forgive you, come here, let me hug you. It's not any doubt, we kind of give a hmm. We kind of cross our shoulders and turn. And things cool off if the fire of the gospel is not fueling our emotions, is not shaping our heart. And like living with a broken bone that is never said and never mends, we are willing to live with perpetually broken relationships. And it's wrong. When we proclaim the excellency of love to the world and we want to quote John 3, 16, but we are completely satisfied to remain apart, passively stiff-arming one another rather than embracing one another through a reconciliation that reflects what God did through the cross of his Son. And my fellow Christ follower, that's wrong. That's wrong. That's wrong. If we say we love God, whom we cannot see, how can we hate our brother whom we see? And many of you know, the opposite of love does not often look like out and out vitriolic hatred. It looks like indifference. Or low grade, you can hide it for a long time, bitterness. and resentment, and unforgiveness, and marginalizing of others. And I want to challenge us with that tonight as we look at Esau and Jacob. So first, the outline. You'll notice that there is this first, just beyond Penuel, meeting Esau at long last, the first three verses, and then the reconciliation in the following eight verses, then they're heading home, verses 12 through 17, and then finally, El Eloha, Israel, home at last, in verses 18 through 20. Jacob will see passes through Penuel. And Moses uses this word behold there in verse 33 to encourage us to see the scene that unfolds through Jacob's eyes. And I want you to imagine a space, something like the size of the sanctuary in this east parking lot, because you understand that from the south, there is Esau with 400 men. And coming from the north, from Haran, is Jacob with his whole group. And we'll lay this out now. The long night on the bank of the Jabbok is over where Jacob wrestled with God himself. And he received this new name, Israel. He received a renewed vision of God and this permanent physical reminder of the one who held him firm. For God touched his hip. And from that point, we think Jacob was something like this. It was like a permanent limp to remind him that his issues were not ultimately with Laban, his issues were not with Esau, but it was God. with whom he would need to wrestle. And 20 long years is almost over, no doubt filled with fear and regret and wondering what would happen when he saw Esau again, his deeply offended brother. How would Esau treat his scheming younger brother? And the parties come together. Esau and 400 men on this side, and Jacob with his servants and wives and their children on the other side. all those animals, maybe some 550 or 580, those goats and sheep and camels and cows and donkeys were stopped, each in their respective flock or herd. Just imagine this scene, this was not paved, all right? So there's the sound of animals and dust and all those smells that we come to associate with livestock. And then Jacob divides the children among all the mothers, Rachel, Leah, and the servants. And he places them, you'll notice this, if for a moment we could imagine that this is Esau and his band of 400 men coming from Seir. Imagine how Jacob then divides them from the less important near the front, those two female servants, to more important in the rear, Rachel, and her only child, Joseph. And I want us to see how Jacob then moves forward towards Esau, and he's bowing himself down very demonstrably on his way. Now he is nearer Esau. Pastor Jamie and I have been to India. You see this degree of bowing, the way that physical movement, getting low, communicates this respect, a desire to receive favor. That's the picture here. And the application for the moment is this. There's no reconciliation without movement, without action, and without initiative. Someone must make the first move. It's like on any project, you have to write the first line. You have to pound the first nail. So I wanna ask you tonight, what move do you need to restore? What move do you need to make to restore a broken relationship? Why are you waiting on the other? And I like this imagery that you see. It is Esau coming, and he's sending a message down to Seir, or it's Jacob sending the message, and Esau comes, and they meet. And it's no small thing. Esau and his band traveled about 130 miles from that location southeast of the Dead Sea up towards Jabbok, all right? East there of the Jordan River, but yet not in Canaan. Well, second, I want us to see the reconciliation accomplished in verses four through 11. Esau doesn't stand at a distance. He doesn't walk at a normal rate of walking. It says, he runs toward his longest estranged brother and he embraces him falling on his neck. And Esau kisses Jacob. It's almost embarrassing. I'm kind of thinking about this. I can just imagine tears are going and Jacob's probably feeling almost mortified because he probably had this legitimate fear that he might kill him. He might exact his revenge. But of Esau and Jacob at long last coming together, Derek Kidner says, the meeting is a classic of reconciliation. Now I want to ask you a question. When you see this verse, when you read in verse four, but Esau ran to meet him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him and they wept, what does it remind you of? Does it remind you of a parable somewhere? What does it? The prodigal son. And when you see Jesus tell the parable in Luke 15 and verse 20, it makes you think that this history of the reconciliation of Esau and Jacob helped shape and give raw material for Jesus to tell this parable. Let me read Luke 15, 20. It says, and he arose, that is of the prodigal son, and he came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And in both cases, whether it's Esau running towards Jacob or the father of the prodigal son running towards his long lost son, it's the greater party, the offended that runs and moves to the offending party. And these two brothers wept. Nothing and no one else mattered in the moment. Where had all those years gone? And it was like all the bitterness drained away in one single soulful moment. Imagine Esau looking up and wondering how all this came together for his younger brother. And so he asked some questions. Who are these with you and what do you mean by all this company that I met? All right? Not a lot of words, not an overwhelmingly long conversation. After all, these are men. Imagine this. And they got all this done in the free 40-minute Zoom call, essentially. It was done. It was like, let's meet, detente, and then they went back home. And group by group, Jacob directs his family towards Esau. First, the servants, no doubt Bilhah and Zilpah and their children. Then Leah and hers, six sons and a single daughter. And finally, Rachel and Joseph, each bowing before Esau in imitation of Jacob. Remember the scheming, heel-grabbing younger brother who blew up the family peace and blew up the family by stealing his brother's birthright and rightful blessing? He now draws his own family near to the brother that he had so greatly offended. And now the second question, what do you mean by all this company that I met? Let me translate. Jacob's answer, I want your favor, so please accept this gift I have prepared for you. For Jacob, Esau's acceptance of his gift was the same as Esau's acceptance of him as a person and a brother. And the men have this bread like tete-a-tete about having enough and no respective need for Jacob's gift. Look at this, Esau in verse nine, I have enough my brother, keep what you have. And then Jacob to Esau in verse 11, please accept my blessing that is brought to you because God has dealt graciously with me, and here's the same words, and because I have enough. Each can do without it. They sound almost identical in their expressions, but there are differences. And I want us to note the differences in how the men are interacting first. It's Esau who addresses Jacob as my brother. But see another feature, Jacob twice, here in verse 11 and then in verse 5, acknowledges that what he has is God's gracious gift. God has graciously given him children. God has graciously prospered him with wealth in the form of numerous livestock, okay? And you want to notice here that here are two men willing to reconcile. One is this patriarch that God is at work forming faith in him, even such that he twice gives credit to God's grace as having given the children to him, verse 5. And then verse 11, it's God who has dealt graciously, he says, with me. But Jacob presses. He presses his brother and Esau concedes. I can just imagine Esau thinking, what's another 500 plus animals, all right? And there's so many applications here as we think about reconciliation, that is making friends with one another, all right? Actually, too, the idea biblically of to reconcile is to make someone a friend with God. And we don't find the word reconciliation in the text. We'll see that later in 2 Corinthians 5. But what we see here is a picture of reconciliation. So just for a few moments, some applications from just this section first. I want us to see the power of physical affection. These men embrace. Esau, he closes the distance between him and Jacob and he braced and leans on him and kisses him. Second, I want us to see the sweetness of terms of endearment like my brother. Let my brother and my sister always be appreciated here, and not just viewed as something that's sickeningly sweet and southern, but that's legitimate, that we find in the New Testament, the use of adelphoi, brothers and sisters. We really are. If you're a Christian, I'm your brother, all right? And you're my brother or sister. We're family. We're in this together. We have the same Heavenly Father, the same Shepherd King, and the same eternal hope. All right, not only do we see the power of physical affection or the sweetness of terms of endearment, but we see this practice of contentment, a willingness to give but also yield. What Pastor Jamie talked about this morning, this sweet reasonableness, an ability to be entreated, a willingness to listen, a willingness to consider, something that we haven't heard before, or that we might have had a misunderstanding, or that we might actually not be the deposit of all the knowledge and wisdom in the world. I also want us to see the blessedness of both giving and receiving, they almost duel here with, and eventually, of course, not surprisingly, Jacob prevails, and Esau yields and says, okay, I'll take the gift. But also the idea of not requiring more than you might have a legitimate right to demand, that if we're going to be reconciled, love, even the idea of atoning is the idea of covering something. There's a sense in which to be reconciled, our forgiveness must mirror that that describes our heavenly Father in Psalm 103, that as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. And when both men express, I have enough, there in verses nine and 11, we receive this word of instruction, and hear me, in the middle of conflict, we discover that we are often more alike than we are different. And that's what helps us. Let's move on to verses 12 through 17 and heading home. The reconciliation. is complete between these long estranged brothers. And I say complete, not as an absolute statement, but you might say a relative statement, as far as we know. They've made their peace. Esau's come a long way with a big group of men. You'll notice that he never brought up the deceit or trickery of his younger twin from so many years earlier. He refused to dig up the past and kindle old grievances. We hear no mention of Esau's angst, no haranguing with his brother with unforgiving hatred. He doesn't remonstrate his brother. He doesn't lecture him. You don't see him trying to have the last words. And his actions illustrate Proverbs 17 and verse nine. Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends. And again, we see he even calls him my brother. And you get the impression that this is a one-day detente or peace summit. Esau, the older brother, takes the lead, now heading south. And the idea here is something like, let's travel along, get going, let's be on our way. And the us here is both parties, Esau and his band of men, and Jacob with his servants, his wives, his children, his livestock, and his belongings. Jacob is understandably sensitive to all for whom he bears a responsibility. And he concedes that, that Esau understands. And I like this, he says, think about how he acknowledges and he commends his brother's understanding. He says, my Lord knows that the children are frail. You go on ahead Esau and we will take our time. We just don't want to push it too hard. You have to remember, right, that Jacob and his group had now covered some 500 plus miles after leaving Haran. He even promises to follow Esau to Seir in the country of Edom. And we might think it's a certainty that Jacob would follow Esau, especially if you'll notice how deferential Jacob is towards Esau. Even three times, Jacob speaks. of his longing to find favor in the sight of my Lord. Very deferential. He speaks of my Lord and your servant. But Jacob continues west towards Canaan and he sojourns for what could have been several years in Succoth, or what we call Booth, given that name because Jacob built a home and shelters there for all his livestock. but yet he hadn't crossed Jordan. He hadn't yet entered Canaan. And it's fair to ask, why did Jacob not follow Esau south to Seir? And I'm going to give you three factors, maybe three ideas why Jacob did not do what he represented he would do with Esau. First, perhaps there was lingering fear of his brother It was still resident in his heart. Second, there might've been this legitimate concern for the welfare of his wives, his children, and livestock. They did represent, and we shouldn't forget this, they did represent the fruit of 20 long years in Haran, a guy that had crossed the Jordan going east with nothing but the clothes on his back, and he comes back with two servants, and two wives, and I think it's 11 children, right? Does that sound right? 11 sons and one daughter. Or third, maybe it was this inner magnet. There's this inner pull that propelled Jacob towards Canaan and back to the homeland of his father and mother. Had Rebekah not said in Genesis 27 and verse 45, arise, flee to Laban, my brother, and Haran until his anger turns away, that I will send and bring you back from there. And the Lord himself swore to Jacob at Beersheba in that angels and ladder dream. He said, behold, I'm with you and will keep you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land. And I believe that meant more than Canaan, but even specifically Bethel. And Jacob pled with his father-in-law Laban for a ticket home after Joseph's birth to Rachel in chapter 30, verse 25. He said, he pled with Laban, send me away that I may go to my own home and country. And then the Lord gave a very direct command to Jacob after Jacob prospered. when it was displeasing Laban. And the Lord said, return to the land of your fathers and to your kindred and I will be with you. And that's in 31 verse 3. And I want to take a moment and put an asterisk on that and correct a statement I made a week ago when I said that the Lord had never directed Jacob to return to Bethel. I was wrong and I want to acknowledge that to you. Please forgive me. That's an error It's very clear that he did right here. And so forgive this pastor for a really glaring error And it was that command, the one in 31.3, that Jacob referred to when he prayed in chapter 32 in verse 9, O Lord, who said to me, return to your country and to your kindred, and I will do you good. Well, finally, we come to the last three verses, Eloha Israel, home at last. We must understand that a lapse of several years takes place here between Jacob's arrival at Succoth, verse 17, post the meeting with Esau, all right? There were several years then between Succoth and then his crossing the Jordan, entering Canaan and his arrival in Shechem. And truth be told, he was really still not there, not quite as far as Bethel, probably less than 30 miles, maybe closer to 20 to the south. And we might say, in a sense, that Shechem, like Succoth, was a compromise for Jacob. He didn't make it all the way to Bethel, but it was a particularly tragic compromise. And when you read here these words, there in verse 18, and Jacob came safely to the city of Shechem, which is in the land of Canaan. That sounds innocent enough. So far, so good, but I want you to know with me just two concerns here for Jacob. First, Shechem was not Bethel. And it was Yahweh who had promised to bring Jacob back in chapter 28, not just to Canaan in the land of his fathers and his kindred, but back to Bethel, that special place where Jacob heard the promises as given to his grandfather Abraham and to his father Isaac. Back to that place where the Lord applied the blessing of those same promises to him and said, they apply to you, they're yours as well. To the place where Jacob exclaimed, surely the Lord is in this place and I did not know it. And how awesome is this place, this is none other than the house of God, Bethel, and this is the gate of heaven. But there's a second reason this was a compromise to land and stay in Shechem and not make it to Bethel. And we'll see it next Lord's Day. The city of Shechem became the scene of an unimaginable horror in violation for Jacob's only daughter, Dinah, and the entire city. Shechem's wicked violation of Dinah came with a great price for his family in the city that bore his name. But for a mere 20 or 30 miles from Shechem, south to Bethel, we could better appreciate the beauty and richness of the name that Jacob gave the altar, El Eloha Israel, or literally, God, the God, of Israel as he embraces his new name and new identity. Well, in conclusion, I think by most standards, Esau and Jacob were reconciled. They made their peace. But was it a perfect reconciliation? with perfect restoration. And I don't think I would place it in that category. Jacob had to leave Canaan for 20 long years after facing Esau's anger and the prospect of dying at his brother's hands. Esau's stolen birthright and blessing were never returned. That scar never healed. And Jacob's less than honest habits surfaced again when he let Esau return to Seir while he continued straight to Succoth, thinking that like when someone's following you, you think they're right behind you, and it wasn't the case. Esau would remain in Seir, his life and heirs fading from the scene, while God would take Jacob, the son of God's free and unconstrained electing love, this one whom God said, Jacob, I love, and Esau, I hate it. And God, through Jacob's loins, would build a nation after Jacob's new name, Israel, from whom we, brothers and sisters, would receive our Savior, Jesus Christ, and perfect reconciliation. For as we see in our big idea, right, every attempt Every attempt at human reconciliation should make us long for that perfect reconciliation which is available only through the cross of Jesus. And I wanna pause here just for a second. Some of you know this. You know the pain of broken relationships that apart from a miracle in this life, they will never be restored. And one of the things that should make us long for heaven is all the brokenness, the alienation, the isolation, the bitterness, the unforgiving, the coldness, the stiff-arming that we know in this world that's groaning under the weight of sin will be no more, will be no more. And we can look forward to that. For all human reconciliation at the end of the day is but a weak copy of the greater and perfect reconciliation that God has accomplished through our Lord Jesus. So husbands and wives, when you fight and you argue and you reconcile and you find yourself two, three days later and it's happening again, Okay, right? The righteous man gets up. He falls seven times and he gets up. You remind yourself as you're thinking, wow, we just did this three days ago, that all human reconciliation is just a very dim copy of what's going to be perfect in eternity in the day of Christ Jesus. Do you want a radical faith? Like, do you really want a radical faith? Reconcile and take away the alienation and coldness between you and another. And I'm gonna put this in quotes, get naked, get honest with someone, get honest with those with whom you're broken. But take the low spot. Let them be my Lord and you be your servant. You come. And you be prepared to ask questions, not make statements. to not make demands, but to bring offerings, to not bring the spade that digs up all the crap of the past, but looks to the brightness and the blessing of what life can be like in Jesus Christ. We, of all people, are not most to be pitied, but to be envied, because we have the hope of the gospel that allows us to start again a new tomorrow. Go in humility to your enemy. See your adversary as more alike you, more like you than different from you. Yearn to find favor in the sight of another. Stop this idea of, I don't care what they think about me. Actually, long. that you're so sweet and compelling and the aroma of Jesus, the fragrance of Jesus comes off you in the way you love, the way you pray, the way you reach out, that they're gonna like you even if you don't want them to. Come in this posture of I have enough, I'm not gonna require anything from you, I'm only coming to love you. Require less than you have the right to ask. Give more than your brother or sister could expect. Remember this morning from Pastor Jamie's sermon from Romans 12. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly, never be conceited. God. Give us grace to know that true and lasting reconciliation that comes only through Jesus. Where God, the offended, reaches out in mercy to us, the offender, and makes peace with us through the blood of the cross. This was Paul's concern, his ministry, the great stewardship he received from the Lord Jesus. to beg men and women to be reconciled with God, to stay no longer out in the dark and the cold on that side of the door, but with this invitation to come on in and be reconciled to him. Tonight, we may not perfectly judge how well Esau and Jacob reconciled. but a gracious heavenly Father offers a perfect, unqualified, life-giving reconciliation to you. Those of you who are here, those of you who are watching, come in and become friends with God through Jesus Christ. Amen.