Christian psychologist Mark Laaser estimates that 30 percent of Christian pastors and leaders struggle with pornography. Among Christian men in general, more than 60 percent are estimated to struggle with continual sexual compulsions of some type.
Those are scary numbers. I wouldn't share them with you if they hadn't been substantiated repeatedly.
My husband's ministry involves helping men of all ages live lives of mental purity‚ÄĒa battle he himself wages daily. Bob gets into the faces of other men and asks them to name the specific distractions they need to remove from their lives in order to live in sexual integrity.
You'd expect them to name temptations such as the Internet, R-rated movies, magazine covers, even the giant Victoria's Secret display ads in the mall. But sadly, they often point to a surprisingly different pit‚ÄĒand they fall into it every Sunday.
I find it interesting that what is in style for men would be considered suitable for attending church services, yet what is 'fashionable' for women promotes the sexualization of women.
The change in fashion trends is part of an industry money maker often referred to in sociology as 'perceived obsolescence'; the change in fashion most often causes the consumer to acquire the perception that there is something wrong with their clothing because it is no longer 'in style'. Thus, the consumer will discard useable clothing and purchase alternate goods which they believe will cause them to fit in socially.
I used to work at a thrift-shop when I was young and was disheartened to see dumpster upon dumpster full of women's clothing sent to the garbage dump (often two a week) as the clothing was not perceived as stylish. As women, I believe we need to stop being victims of the fashion industry, by spending countless dollars and wearing fashions which may ruin the reputation.
In essence, as women we need to pay special attention that we do not conform to this world, in areas such as fashion and behaviours.
If a woman has a fashionable 'bob-cut' see or blonde dyed hair or wears high heels or mini-skirt-or many of the latest fashions from Cosmopolitan or follows Hollywood? Why and when did short skirts become fashionable-the 60's? When did men look like women-70's.
Looking at how certain things become fashionable might help us to see what is worldly fashion and what is not.
If a homosexual pop singer is singing about 'lurvvv..love' how can we be sure that we should be humming along?
Liza J and Gayle and others, the good thing is the Lord has given you the desire to remain faithful to His Word and Counsel, that's very encouraging. much what the saints over the centuries have walked through.
MG, you are so right about church nit bring there for the saints. Too many churches have turned their backs on the faithful and started this new way of preaching salvation every week. In our area of MD you are hard pressed to find a church preaching the whole counsel of God.
Men and women both have a responsibility to dress and behave modestly ‚ÄĒ men and women equally, have a moral responsibility to abstains from worldly lusts ‚ÄĒ Example: I have been to churches where the the women are ALL dressed modestly (with long dresses, skirts, and long sleeves) and the majority of the men looked like they dressed straight out of a GQ magazine, all in nice suits with slick hair. In more modern churches I have seen men in the worship team and pastors dressed like rock stars. I have seen both men and women dress and behave immodestly in church settings, particularly, with men wanting to lay hands on women to pray, or making sexually inappropriate jokes. Our christian men need to step up, and help congregations obey and love God in wholesomeness and in truth!
These "30 percent of Christian pastors and leaders struggle with pornography" need to immediately inform their wives, congregation and broader faith community of their sin. This way the congregation can be knowledgeable of their lifestyle of sin as when one's engaged in adultery. If a congregation has three ministers, one is very likely hooked on porn.
I admit, Jessica, that I'm coming from a home church perspective, so don't think there needs to be some special "women's ministry" in place. In terms of us men not falling into temptation, I totally agree! However, even Godly men have struggled with this issue right from Genesis. We are all being sanctified!
MG wrote: Jessica, you wondered how pastors are going to help women who come into churches with sexual sins that need dealing with. Well, can I ask: do they need to, and should they? I think it would be unwise for them to "minister" to these women. Surely there would be some Godly women who could guide these other women! We've been reading of men falling after trying to deal with some of these issues by themselves. It's dangerous and foolish from my perspective. There is an enemy trying to catch anyone like this unawares.
I agree, yet most churches I have been to do not have women's ministries in place, and women are left trying to ask the male pastors for spiritual help. The men as well as women need to be transformed by the renewing of their minds, and see women as sisters and mothers (1 Timothy 5:2) and not objects of sexualization as the media portrays them.
"Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." ~ Matthew 26:41
Jessica, I would have to disagree that church is for the lost. It's for the saints. Now the gospel, that's for the lost. The great commission is for us to go not for them to come to us. And if church is full of lost people how are the saints suppose to get the meat when the milk is constantly beinh preached over and over again.
Jessica, you wondered how pastors are going to help women who come into churches with sexual sins that need dealing with. Well, can I ask: do they need to, and should they?
I think it would be unwise for them to "minister" to these women. Surely there would be some Godly women who could guide these other women! We've been reading of men falling after trying to deal with some of these issues by themselves. It's dangerous and foolish from my perspective. There is an enemy trying to catch anyone like this unawares.
I agree, as christian women we need to dress in a chaste manner ‚ÄĒ however, the church should be prepared for unsaved women visitors who need the knowledge of salvation ‚ÄĒ the church needs to be a place where visiting unsaved women (who may be dressed immodestly) get treated as more than sexual objects for once in their lives ‚ÄĒ if 30% of christian pastors struggle with pornography, how are they going to be able to effectively minister to women who are stuck in sexual sins who walk through the church doors, and this, with the grace and dignity as Jesus treated women of reputation?
If the women in the church can freely dress this way then the leadership needs to take it more seriously and confront the issue. If they are unwilling I would question how serious they are about sin and the protection of the flock.
1 corithians 7 deals with thos issue directly at home as well.