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Breaking News Home | All | Religion | Society | Tech | Choice | SA News
FRONT PAGE  |  5/27/2015
SUNDAY, APR 27, 2014  |  21 comments
How Women Can Make Church a Safe Place for Men
Christian psychologist Mark Laaser estimates that 30 percent of Christian pastors and leaders struggle with pornography. Among Christian men in general, more than 60 percent are estimated to struggle with continual sexual compulsions of some type.

Those are scary numbers. I wouldn't share them with you if they hadn't been substantiated repeatedly.

My husband's ministry involves helping men of all ages live lives of mental purity—a battle he himself wages daily. Bob gets into the faces of other men and asks them to name the specific distractions they need to remove from their lives in order to live in sexual integrity.

You'd expect them to name temptations such as the Internet, R-rated movies, magazine covers, even the giant Victoria's Secret display ads in the mall. But sadly, they often point to a surprisingly different pit—and they fall into it every Sunday. ...


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www.charismamag.com

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COMMENTS | show all | add new  
    Sorting Order:  
· Page 1 ·  Found: 21 user comment(s)
News Item4/29/14 12:04 AM
Jules  Find all comments by Jules
1 peter 3:3-4
Golden verse for this topic
21

News Item4/28/14 4:10 PM
Jessica Dawson | Canada  Find all comments by Jessica Dawson
I find it interesting that what is in style for men would be considered suitable for attending church services, yet what is 'fashionable' for women promotes the sexualization of women.

The change in fashion trends is part of an industry money maker often referred to in sociology as 'perceived obsolescence'; the change in fashion most often causes the consumer to acquire the perception that there is something wrong with their clothing because it is no longer 'in style'. Thus, the consumer will discard useable clothing and purchase alternate goods which they believe will cause them to fit in socially.

I used to work at a thrift-shop when I was young and was disheartened to see dumpster upon dumpster full of women's clothing sent to the garbage dump (often two a week) as the clothing was not perceived as stylish. As women, I believe we need to stop being victims of the fashion industry, by spending countless dollars and wearing fashions which may ruin the reputation.

In essence, as women we need to pay special attention that we do not conform to this world, in areas such as fashion and behaviours.

God bless, hope & peace to you all!

20

News Item4/28/14 11:35 AM
necktied  Find all comments by necktied
If a woman has a fashionable 'bob-cut' see or blonde dyed hair or wears high heels or mini-skirt-or many of the latest fashions from Cosmopolitan or follows Hollywood? Why and when did short skirts become fashionable-the 60's? When did men look like women-70's.

Looking at how certain things become fashionable might help us to see what is worldly fashion and what is not.

If a homosexual pop singer is singing about 'lurvvv..love' how can we be sure that we should be humming along?

The worst fashion is 'power' women in business suits. For a professing Christian woman not to see this Fashion editor who loves dressing like a man is indeed most sad.

'Androgyny is the combination of masculine and feminine characteristics. Sexual ambiguity may be found in fashion, gender identity, sexual identity, or sexual lifestyle.'

See the former Cosmopolitan editor's reference to 'androgyny' and if the world of fashion can see the obvious-how come Christian ladies have any difficulty or excuse?

19

News Item4/27/14 8:09 PM
pennnned  Find all comments by pennnned
Liza J and Gayle and others, the good thing is the Lord has given you the desire to remain faithful to His Word and Counsel, that's very encouraging. much what the saints over the centuries have walked through.
18

News Item4/27/14 7:58 PM
Liza J  Find all comments by Liza J
Gayle, we live out west and we cannot find a doctrinally sound assembly either
My how it is fallen.
17

News Item4/27/14 7:53 PM
Gayle | Maryland  Contact via emailFind all comments by Gayle
MG, you are so right about church nit bring there for the saints. Too many churches have turned their backs on the faithful and started this new way of preaching salvation every week. In our area of MD you are hard pressed to find a church preaching the whole counsel of God.
16

News Item4/27/14 7:02 PM
Jessica Dawson | Canada  Find all comments by Jessica Dawson
Men and women both have a responsibility to dress and behave modestly — men and women equally, have a moral responsibility to abstains from worldly lusts — Example: I have been to churches where the the women are ALL dressed modestly (with long dresses, skirts, and long sleeves) and the majority of the men looked like they dressed straight out of a GQ magazine, all in nice suits with slick hair. In more modern churches I have seen men in the worship team and pastors dressed like rock stars. I have seen both men and women dress and behave immodestly in church settings, particularly, with men wanting to lay hands on women to pray, or making sexually inappropriate jokes. Our christian men need to step up, and help congregations obey and love God in wholesomeness and in truth!

Church pastor resigns; admits to having affairs

15

News Item4/27/14 6:57 PM
yilpslich  Find all comments by yilpslich
These "30 percent of Christian pastors and leaders struggle with pornography" need to immediately inform their wives, congregation and broader faith community of their sin. This way the congregation can be knowledgeable of their lifestyle of sin as when one's engaged in adultery. If a congregation has three ministers, one is very likely hooked on porn.
14

News Item4/27/14 6:54 PM
MG | the Land Down Under  Find all comments by MG
I admit, Jessica, that I'm coming from a home church perspective, so don't think there needs to be some special "women's ministry" in place. In terms of us men not falling into temptation, I totally agree! However, even Godly men have struggled with this issue right from Genesis. We are all being sanctified!
13

News Item4/27/14 6:30 PM
Liza J  Find all comments by Liza J
SF and MG....I agree
12

News Item4/27/14 6:24 PM
Jessica Dawson | Canada  Find all comments by Jessica Dawson
MG wrote:
Jessica, you wondered how pastors are going to help women who come into churches with sexual sins that need dealing with. Well, can I ask: do they need to, and should they?
I think it would be unwise for them to "minister" to these women. Surely there would be some Godly women who could guide these other women! We've been reading of men falling after trying to deal with some of these issues by themselves. It's dangerous and foolish from my perspective. There is an enemy trying to catch anyone like this unawares.
I agree, yet most churches I have been to do not have women's ministries in place, and women are left trying to ask the male pastors for spiritual help. The men as well as women need to be transformed by the renewing of their minds, and see women as sisters and mothers (1 Timothy 5:2) and not objects of sexualization as the media portrays them.

"Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak." ~ Matthew 26:41

11

News Item4/27/14 6:24 PM
SF from TX  Find all comments by SF from TX
Jessica, I would have to disagree that church is for the lost. It's for the saints. Now the gospel, that's for the lost. The great commission is for us to go not for them to come to us. And if church is full of lost people how are the saints suppose to get the meat when the milk is constantly beinh preached over and over again.

MG, in total agreement.

10

News Item4/27/14 6:06 PM
MG | the Land Down Under  Find all comments by MG
Jessica, you wondered how pastors are going to help women who come into churches with sexual sins that need dealing with. Well, can I ask: do they need to, and should they?

I think it would be unwise for them to "minister" to these women. Surely there would be some Godly women who could guide these other women! We've been reading of men falling after trying to deal with some of these issues by themselves. It's dangerous and foolish from my perspective. There is an enemy trying to catch anyone like this unawares.

9

News Item4/27/14 4:59 PM
William S. Sutherland | Houston, Texas  Find all comments by William S. Sutherland
A great little booklet that deals with this issue is entitled The Sin Of Bathsheba by Charles L. Church. Highly Recommended!
8

News Item4/27/14 4:47 PM
Jim Lincoln | Nebraska  Find all comments by Jim Lincoln
I just read the introduction that SA put up, when is it a Pastor's duty to run a Catholic type confessional? This article has several bad points to it, and most superficially to how women dress.
7

News Item4/27/14 4:34 PM
Jessica Dawson | Canada  Find all comments by Jessica Dawson
I agree, as christian women we need to dress in a chaste manner — however, the church should be prepared for unsaved women visitors who need the knowledge of salvation — the church needs to be a place where visiting unsaved women (who may be dressed immodestly) get treated as more than sexual objects for once in their lives — if 30% of christian pastors struggle with pornography, how are they going to be able to effectively minister to women who are stuck in sexual sins who walk through the church doors, and this, with the grace and dignity as Jesus treated women of reputation?
6

News Item4/27/14 2:11 PM
Gayle | Maryland  Contact via emailFind all comments by Gayle
I personally think it is shameful of these girls walking around today in these skimpy outfits. They obviously think very little of themselves.
5

News Item4/27/14 2:08 PM
Gayle | Maryland  Find all comments by Gayle
It's obvious to me if women disagree with this article than she either is completely ignorant as to how men are wired; or else she doesn't care and chooses to be a stumbling block to her brothers.
4

News Item4/27/14 10:44 AM
JSC | Illinois  Find all comments by JSC
If the women in the church can freely dress this way then the leadership needs to take it more seriously and confront the issue. If they are unwilling I would question how serious they are about sin and the protection of the flock.

1 corithians 7 deals with thos issue directly at home as well.

3

News Item4/27/14 7:55 AM
Strat  Find all comments by Strat
Nice to see women given some instruction on their responseabilities and obligations for a change.
2
There are a total of 21 user comments displayed | add new comment |Subscribe to these comments
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