Your post was too funny to remove so I took the liberty to edit and repost.
Islamic Black Magic via the Qur'an
For bullet‑proof vest, Islamic style, write the entire Sura Ya Sin (Sura 36) on an Islamic shirt, and wear it. No bullet will pierce this Islamic vest .http://www.islam-watch.org/AbulKasem/IslamicVoodoos/Part5.htm
Then show ur self to the yanks and the brits,tell them ur a jehadi soldier come to kick there rear, and see if the vest works.